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Note I Wrote My Sister


Guest raydub

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Guest raydub

i can use a little constructive criticism. i wrote my sister a note (coming out as trans) last night.

i didnt want to be too thorough, cause i want her to talk to me at some point about it.

but can i have your opinions on what i wrote?

thanks guys. :blush:

Ray

Subject: hrm... (warning: LONG note)

Body:

so.. i got your last comment and thought i'd write you. its the first way we discovered how to talk to each other, so i guess its not all THAT weird.

ive been wanting to talk to you. to tell you about me. let you know that im transgender. i havent exactly known how to approach the subject, though ive thought hard about it and almost brought it up the last couple times i came over. i talked to dad about it some and he doesnt seem to mind..but we both know that that's how he is. mom of course doesnt care cause she just wants us all to be happy.

having discovered this about myself is kinda funny since everyone was expecting that i'd be a boy when i was born. you were all right.. i just so happen to be in a girl's body. over the next couple years i plan to change that - transition to be male. im sure we can discuss what all of that entails in the near future, if youd like. i just.. wanted to tell you. so you'd know what was going on with me. and kinda understand why im so awkward sometimes. its difficult, feeling like a boy, or a man as it were.. and people not seeing you that way.

so i open the floor for discussion.. if you want to call me you can...im up and available. im sure youre probably doing music stuff though, so whenever is cool. i just hope you arent too weirded out by the circumstance. ...grr..and i have NO idea how im going to tell *my other sister*. sigh...(we've been here before eh?)

uum.. so, im going by Ray... short for Raymond. i plan to change my name to Raymond . not sure about having a middle name or not.. but i'll go by Ray since our nephew goes by Raymond.. and that's kinda weird.. all the guys in the family having the same name. ...i asked dad about the name thing.. asking if it was weird that we'd all have the same name (Raymond) and he said, "you can go by Ray".. so Im pretty set on it. *smile*

yeah.. hrm.. ok.. i guess that's it. good night SUPERSTAR!

i love you.

Ray

-the baby

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Guest StrandedOutThere

It seems like you were very straightforward and honest. That's good.

I don't know your sister or you or anything, so I can't say much here. With my sister, I don't know that I'd mention transitioning right off the bat. My style is to let one idea sink in before I bring up another one, but that's just me. I think my situation is different because I am not out to anyone in my family in any sense of the word. As far as my family knows, I am a nice hetersexual girl. Yup, I'm afraid some bombshells are gonna get dropped at my house... *BANG* *POW*

So, did you send the note already? You'll have to let us know how she responds. Coming out is hard, but it feels so good to finally be honest with people. I hate having secrets.

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Guest raydub

haha.. straight-forward and honest.. really the only way i know how to be.

im not really good with beating around the bush.. and i generally have NO tact.. which is why i wanted to know what people thought of this letter...

i thought id mention transitioning because i cant think of any other reason i would want to be called Raymond (or Ray, as it wer) and her not to refer to me as "Lil Sis" ...which is what sparked me writing the note anyway.

I sent it. And she hasnt responded yet. we'll see eh?

Ray

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Guest raydub

ha! after i posted last i checked for a response from her.. and i got it!

wow. that was a lot even for me. still digesting it all, but I want you to know that I love you very much and as long as you love yourself then I support anythng you want to do with your life.

The only thing I really care about for you is that you get to a space where you can put that classic *birthname* (ray) smile back on your face.

I haven't seen it in a long long time and I don't know where that person is who used to smile like that and be free-spirited like that.

I don't care what you do, but bring that person back, and love yourself!

i dont think i could have asked for more. :D

*sigh of relief*

Ray

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Guest StrandedOutThere

That's awesome! I'm really happy for you! You have one really awesome sister! She sounds really mature and cool! :P

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Guest jessi72

Hey Ray,

I am so glad to hear that it went that well. Sometimes the best gifts are right in front of your eyes. You are so lucky to have a sister that just wants you to be happy. Reading that response actualy made me cry. I have been there. Thought the same as you and dreaded the outcome. I have also discovered the happiness that comes from a response like that. It was the same with my sister as it was with my parents.

Again, CONGRATS!!!

Nicely done, and I wish you the the best and happiness,

Jessi

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Guest Jack Solomon

Very cool, Ray. Your sister sounds like she took it very well, and it's great that she just wants you to be happy. I just talked to my aunt last night and she also took it much better than I could have expected or hoped for. It's a great feeling. :)

Solomon

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Guest raydub

aww.. thanks guys. :lol:

yea my eldest sister is awesome. now ive got to work on the other sister.. she's the middle child and takes EVERYTHING kinda hard. we'll see though. never know. .... ... i think i'll just bask in THIS response for a while though first.

:D

Ray

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Guest GoldenKirbichu

It's wonderful that your sibling is so supportive. I hope the rest of your family will take the news so well.

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Guest StrandedOutThere
aww.. thanks guys. :lol:

yea my eldest sister is awesome. now ive got to work on the other sister.. she's the middle child and takes EVERYTHING kinda hard. we'll see though. never know. .... ... i think i'll just bask in THIS response for a while though first.

:D

Ray

Oh...the middle child...that's a tough one. My sister is the middle child in my family, and I'm the oldest. My sister takes everything really hard too!

Yeah, bask in this for a while. Your eldest sister really is awesome. I'm sure your other sister will come around in time too.

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Guest VLee

Congratulations, we could form the sisters celebration club, hehe. Saw your post saying things went well and just had to say that I'm like you in this. She is the first family member to be told, it sure helped a lot. She even volunteered to be there with me when I am ready to tell my mom and dad. I do have a couple of close friends that know, but I think its made a big difference having someone that has known me most of my life being supportive.

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Guest raydub

my mom and my eldest sister are really close. in the letter i wrote her, i put in much more information than me and my mom had the chance to talk about. when i talked to my mom today.. she called me Ray instead of my birthname. that pretty much confirmed what i knew would happen.. my sister talked to my mom about it. its cool, cause she knew i felt like a boy..she just didnt know.. everything else.. about transition and everything. i DO wonder what all my sister said to her.. but maybe i can strike that conversation up next time i see her. either way.. things are going good on the "coming out" front.

just sharing happy stories because they DO happen. i dont know how often.. but they do! see.. proof!

:lol: again with the late night delirium.

Ray

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Guest Sheila

hi ray,

i remeber the letter i wrote my sister. i put a lot time and emotion into that letter and you know, she still has it. she keeps it because she said it was of most beautiful letter she's ever read. my sister was in my corner from way back. she used to let me wear her dresses when we were childern so it wasn't much of a shock to her. on the other hand, when my family found out how i wanted to live, they reacted in the typical manner, outrage, rejection and worse.. you're so lucky to have understanding parents and one sibling, for now anyways, who love you and care for your well being. that will go a long way.your sister's reply is just beautiful man. she speaks her mind so well. i wish you the best of luck dude. i hope you don't mind me calling you dude, which i'm fairly certain you won't, just a habit, i call a lot of guys dude when i address them. a habit from way back. i'd like to add, that i'm through caring what people think of me. if they don't like it, too bad. :)

sheila

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Guest raydub
hi ray,

i remeber the letter i wrote my sister. i put a lot time and emotion into that letter and you know, she still has it. she keeps it because she said it was of most beautiful letter she's ever read. my sister was in my corner from way back. she used to let me wear her dresses when we were childern so it wasn't much of a shock to her. on the other hand, when my family found out how i wanted to live, they reacted in the typical manner, outrage, rejection and worse.. you're so lucky to have understanding parents and one sibling, for now anyways, who love you and care for your well being. that will go a long way.your sister's reply is just beautiful man. she speaks her mind so well. i wish you the best of luck dude. i hope you don't mind me calling you dude, which i'm fairly certain you won't, just a habit, i call a lot of guys dude when i address them. a habit from way back. i'd like to add, that i'm through caring what people think of me. if they don't like it, too bad. :)

sheila

Sheila, thank you for your support. I totally dont mind you calling me dude...i rather like it.

And GOOD FOR YOU for not caring about what people think..that's the way to live!!!

Welcome again to the forums...stick around!

Ray

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