What about the non-binary?

[Guest SouthernBelle]

Am I the only one on here identifying as non-binary? Not that it would be a bad thing, but I would love to know of those that fit somewhere between the classifications of male and female. I know the prevalence of my 'condition' is relatively rare within our community, but I would love to hear what any/all have to say about my kind. Do you fit somewhere in between? Do you know someone that does?

LP is such a great community and I think it would be cool to meet others, such as myself

HUGS

Belle

[Charlize]

I rarely use labels except trans for myself. The classifications seem to flux between individuals and in different settings. I present and live at this point of my life as a female and have for about two years at this point of time. I also spent 63 years of my life presenting as male. While i much prefer the life i live now and find it convenient to chose one gender to use in presentation. I don't want to be male again but i realize that my years of being male will not disappear completely. I don't regret them. Parts of me were formed as a male and will most likely never go away. Looking at this i also remember that many women like to farm, do wood work and many "male" pursuits. Maybe i was such a feminist all my life because i knew i would end up female.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Drea]

Am I the only one on here identifying as non-binary? Not that it would be a bad thing, but I would love to know of those that fit somewhere between the classifications of male and female. I know the prevalence of my 'condition' is relatively rare within our community, but I would love to hear what any/all have to say about my kind. Do you fit somewhere in between? Do you know someone that does?

There are certainly plenty of non-binary folks who frequent this site. Some are gender fluid and feel they change, some like being right in the middle.

[Guest sally-jane]

it aldepends where you look as for me i fit somewhere in between male and female with my body at the moment me where it has male and female parts naturally and in thats sense i am non binary

sally

[Guest HughE]

I identify as bigender. I'm definitely not a woman, but nonetheless there's a part of me that is highly feminine and identifies quite strongly as female. I suffer from secondary hypogonadism too, which has given me a body structure that's a lot like a cross between a man's and a woman's. I think all this is the result of a hormone exposure incident during the second trimester of my mother's pregnancy with me, that caused the early stages of my brain's sexually dimorphic development to go down the female pathway instead of the male one.

[Guest devida]

I identify more with non-binary than any other label. I don't think of myself as a man. I don't see a man when I look in the mirror even though my sex is male. I don't see a woman either and I'm not transitioning MtF. I do wear a lot of women's clothes, including a bra, women's shape wear, make up, and small breast forms. I do prefer women's clothes but I don't think my mannerisms and walk are quite those of a woman. I wear women's clothes because I find them more comfortable and because they are a sign, at least to myself, that my gender is not male. Gender, particularly for those of us who are not born into the sex with which we associate our gender, is greatly based on the stories we tell ourselves about who we are, the personal and internal narrative. We use external cues to support this narrative, like, in my case, bras and panties. I am certainly transgender but I'm more comfortable with non-binary because transgender is often assumed to refer to a person in transition from one sex to another. That's not quite a correct usage of the term but it is common. Transgender is the umbrella term. Non-binary is the specific term within that umbrella. Let me give a shoutout to the absolutely fabulous tumblr Ask A Non Binary. This person is doing awesome work helping to develop the vocabulary that non binaries like me need to describe ourselves. I am grateful to everyone who does this because I did not know how to describe myself before this vocabulary was developed which was really only in the last few years. And the ability to describe myself to myself and to others makes me happy.

[tracy_j]

Mentally I am non-binary. I drift around or even at times jump back and forth but when I think I do not think (perhaps does not sound to make any sense). Physically I am male and sexually I must be (I love children so if I ever get the chance for another baby, which I would love, I would have to be as I am). That said, I have little feeling for differences between male and female. I never have had and always wondered why there should be. The physical differences in my view are fundamentally geared toward sexual reproduction and gender encompasses far more than this basic function.

Tracy

[Guest SouthernBelle]

Well, all of that is simply heartening. It's weird having once thought I was a boy, then a girl, and then knowing I am neither. It only complicates things to realize that the internet is full of information on any of the binaries, but lacking on information regarding MTF-style non-binaries... Basically, I'm neither male nor female. I'm like a boy-girl? I want to be pretty, but I don't want to have to give up being a man. I like my goatee, but I'm looking forward to breasts... lol, so complicated... Anyway, thanks for replying. It's nice to see some variance

HUGS,

Belle

[Guest SouthernBelle]

But do any of you no also identify as transsexual? Perhaps therein lies the true question

[Guest devida]

Google defines transexual as:

a person who emotionally and psychologically feels that they belong to the opposite sex

Since I do not feel like I belong to either binary even though I would say I am more femme in my presentation and the way I think about myself than most biological males I cannot see how this definition applies to me.

Here's a definition from genderqueerid.com/gq-terms that comes close to the way I would identify myself though I'd shorten it to trans-femme

Transfeminine: “A term used to describe those who were assigned the male gender at birth, but who feel wholly dissociated from male gender identification, and who, if not wholly female-identified, are at a place much closer to that end of the binary spectrum, either through a preference towards behavioral or physical “femininity,” or through being in a state similar to that of a demigirl, where they may feel “weakly female,” but not very attached to the idea of being a “woman.” [*]

[Guest Lindt]

I am genderfluid. Sometimes I identify more or less female and I am okay with my birth sex. Other times, like now, I feel super masculine and trans, and I wish I could just have a perfectly flat chest and be stronger and stuff. The trouble is that I know I might switch or drift at any time, so there isn't a permanent "fix" that would make me feel better, like surgery and/or T, because I know it would change. <| Also, I like my face the way it is, and I think genitals are gross (I'm asexual). Lol...

My feminist side sometimes tries to guilt trip me into thinking I'm "deserting my people" or something, which is really annoying.

Also, my birth name (Belinda) is a cool name to me, but I like being called Lindt because I feel like it suits me more. I am still debating pronouns...

So, to answer your question, yes.

Just keep in mind that there are lots of us out there, and we all support each other no matter how things go down. <|

Hope that helps, Belle.

-Lindt <|

P.S. haha it's cool we have the same name, sort of... <|

[tracy_j]

I may call myself transexual to explain myself a little to society at large (although thinking about it I never have!) but do not like to be held to definitions and as my thinking jumps about so I stick with androgyne or non binary in the main.

[Guest Nick]

Sometimes I'll feel strictly FtM, but I find more often that I identify as neutrois. Like I'm male, female, and other genders, but I'm also none of those at the same time. (Though I sometimes do lean slightly towards male even then, which I guess would make me transmasculine neutrois) That probably didn't make much sense, but it's how I feel. Kind of gender-neutral, I suppose.

[Guest abigus]

I'd definitely identify as non-binary... Though I was born male, and tried my best growing up to be the boy everyone wanted me to be, I knew I was always far more feminine. Once I realized I didn't see myself as male, I tried seeing myself as female. But that didn't lessen the confusion I felt inside any... finally, I've realized I'm neither. Best way I can describe it is like drama class... This body, this life, is just an act. I can act like a male, or I can act like a female. In that sense, I can be gender fluid at times; sometimes I'm more aggressive and masculine, and sometimes I'm more gentle and dainty. Personally, I lean more towards the feminine, but (and perhaps it's only because of being forced to be male my whole life), I can't get rid of my masculine side either. And ya know, I don't like terms... none of them really fit xD I just wish we could all just be the varying degrees of who we are, ya know? In my mind there is absolutely nothing wrong or unnatractive about a woman with a beard, or a guy with make-up. I think humans are more androgynous than a lot of people realize.

[Guest noeleena]

Hi,

In simple terms a person who is both male and female and theres no difference between the two for my self , or an intersexed person ,and in my case a non sexual person, no sexual organs, if you can live with that then your content with who you are,

For the records legel im a female born, or an intersexed female , for those who know me, they really dont care ,

im just noeleena,

[Guest ZombieDracula]

I'm a genderfluid woman myself. I've been all over the spectrum. This is what fits me most. I also cross-dress, though not too often these days (mainly because I have to do this adult responsibility called "laundry"; whatever that is ).