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Sometime I think that we are our own worst enemy especially when it comes to passing! Today I decided to go shopping the first store I went to was a plus size store that I normally shop at, the sales ladies are friendly and helpful. I picked several top and was let into a dressing room after I put on the first top the sales lady ask me to come out so she could see how the top fit, when I came out a lady customer saw me and said "that looks very good on you ma'am ". After trying on other tops and other ladies giving me their opinion on the tops I bought 2 tops and a dress. All of the the customers and sales ladies only used she, her..... After that I decided to go to a major chain store. I looked around for a while, when I got to the jewelry department I saw a pair of earrings I liked. The sales lady was busy with another customer,  while I waited others woman customers started to show up. After the sales lady finished with the first customer she turned to us and said "who is next"? One of the other customer said "she is" and pointed to me.  On my way out I stopped in the woman's restroom, it was busy but no one played any attention to me. With all that happened to day I'm starting to think that I may pass better than I thought?. 

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All of us reach a fateful but exhilarating point when we hit


That day when we find that our True gender is what others have no trouble seeing.  May not be perfect "passing" which is a concept that I turn up my nose at, but a day when we no longer set off alarms for others,  Congrats.

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Yesterday really boosted my confidence. Now I have a lot less self doubt about passing?

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Yep, total male fail.  Congrats, folks are seeing the real you now! :) 



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I love that "male fail", it's a really confidence booster !

Yesterday, I had to go to an official appointment. I had a summon titled "Mr. xxx"

I presented me with the summon, the man asked me. "What's your name Madam?" I tell him my family name... then he said "OK, Madam, but we need to talk to MR. xxx" then I explained I was a trans women and that the "MR.xxx" was in front of him.

He didn't trust me! He insists : "No, Madam, it's not possible. I have already seen MR.xxx and he doesn't look like you, so please contact him and tell him to come ASAP".

I had to show him my medical certificate to convince him I still officially was "MR.xxx". He reads the doctor's paper 3 times, he shows it to some colleagues during several minutes before coming back to me. During that time I was laughing and felt very good.

Then he was pretty cool, told me that I should ask for a name change ASAP because I will have lot of problems with that appearance. He continues to address to me as "Madam" and wrote the whole report with feminine pronoun.

But as I am still young into my transition I am still afraid thinking "ok, today I seemed to pass, that's nice, but what about tomorrow?"


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I'm starting to love the "male fail" more and more I am being called by female pronouns, doors are held open for me... Before everything that happened up above I doubted that I passed, now I have very little doubt.   ?

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The first time I got a "Madam" in very early transition was a huge break point. I will remember that moment for the rest of my life. I thought I could never pass without long months of HRT and some surgery. From this moment I couldn't switch back to male mode... and I never switched back! 

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With my employer non discrimination policy getting ma'am, she, her...it was not a big problem, but out side of work it is very meaningful to me, people in general are seeing me as a woman.

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I love it when random strangers compliment my outfit! That means a lot to me.

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