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KymmieL

Good morning All. Coffees on.

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JustineM

So in meeting with my therapist today I hadn’t realized I never told her my new name. 😳🤔 I just mentioned something kind of off hand about someone meeting Justine, “Oh, you never told me your new name.” Oops lol. 

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Ellora
2 hours ago, JustineM said:

So in meeting with my therapist today I hadn’t realized I never told her my new name. 😳🤔 I just mentioned something kind of off hand about someone meeting Justine, “Oh, you never told me your new name.” Oops lol. 

Over a year ago, when I told my Doctor I was interested in starting HRT, she was a bit surprised, cause I had never mentioned anything to her before. I mentioned to her that I had started using an initial starting several months prior, cause I had been slowly moving away from "my old self.' We had a good laugh about it, cause she had noticed it, but never thought to ask. 

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TammyAnne
On 5/25/2020 at 11:03 PM, Mx.Drago said:

I missed my morning cup cuz spent the whole night up and spent most the day trying to rest with the neighbors blasting music that was so loud, the house vibrated from the bass. Looks like I got two black eyes, I'm so tired. But need coffee otherwise I start getting a headache. Use to be terrible, drinking up to 5 cups easy. Now I can barely have 2. My gut can only take so much abuse from acid.

 

I understand.

I just stay with my two cups in the morning and all goes well. Mess with that and all goes awry.

Sorry about the neighbors. I'd have been tempted to roll my guitar amp into position aiming their way and crank it up (mine only goes to 10, but it's 245 watts of 10) and serenade them a bit.

TA

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Ms Maddie

Morning.

Didn't sleep much again, but feeling brighter

And bearded ;) A friend from forums referred me towards their electrolgist. They have reopened this week and want to look over my face today.  Free consult yeah!!.  Interested what they notice and if they have opinions about the results I have from the work done on me already.

 

If it doesn't storm I may take a hike afterwards.

 

 

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Mmindy

Good:coffee: morning everyone,

 

Yesterdays therapy session was very good, and filled with tips on how to bring my wife up to speed on my push to open the closet door. She and I sat at the dinner table last evening talking about my pinned up emotions, the tough man who consoles everyone else with positive motivation, hides and doesn't take my own advice. She said that the world she knows, sees me as this happy go luck guy ready to cheer anyone up with a smile and quick witted quote. Never suspecting I was really spending my alone time sad, afraid, and hidden.

I told her I was about to show her the depth of my true emotions, and as side of me that I hope will not run her off. I kept reinforcing that my long term goal is for us to continue to grow old together. That made her laugh because we're both in our mid 60's and make noises when we stand up from the arm chairs. I'm still a few weeks from coming out to her... It won't be long and then we'll see if it's a smooth slow ride into transition or an explosive I'm out of here reaction.

 

>Hugs< and love for everyone,

 

Mindy🐛🌈🦋

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Erikka

Good morning all. I used to drink two or three 20oz triple red eyes daily until my doctor asked me if I was attempting suicide by caffeine. Now I drink 8oz in the morning and occasionally a 16oz red eye when out and about with DD1.

Behind the house I shared with my ex was a rental house that was always rented out to college students. One night their party was sooooooo frickin’ loud that even the dog was not happy. Their party died about 3 am and when I got up at 5 am to go to work I did wheel my 100 watt Marshall stack out to the back deck, cranked it to the max and serenade the neighbors with the intro to “Iron Man”. Wheeled back into my studio and end to work.

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Mmindy
30 minutes ago, Erikka said:

Their party died about 3 am and when I got up at 5 am to go to work I did wheel my 100 watt Marshall stack out to the back deck, cranked it to the max and serenade the neighbors with the intro to “Iron Man”. Wheeled back into my studio and end to work

Erikka,

 

It's amazing to me how much in common we all have here. I did a similar thing to my across the street neighbors, by firing up my Harley inside the garage acting like an amphitheater to their bedrooms. I don't mind a Friday or Saturday party in the hood, but weeknights need to have a respectable quiet hour.

 

Have a great day,

 

Mindy🐛🌈🦋

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Susan R

Good Morning all. Having a Carmel Pecan cup of Java today. It’s been awhile since I’ve had this flavor. It’s pretty good. It’s an absolutely beautiful day here in the Pacific Northwest. I’m going to spend a day with a old friend of mine in my old stomping grounds on Port Susan here in Snohomish County. It’s a beautiful area. Should be a good time.

 

Susan R🌷

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Willow

@Patti Anne @ShawnaLeigh @KymmieL @Jackie C. when the comment was made about being single etc I as just trying to play into the whole I know a secret but I’ll never tell.  I hope I didn’t stir up any controversy.  I just want everyone to be who they are.  Share some good times and ask for help when we need it.  And otherwise use this coffee clutch as a ay to have a good conversation with good friends even those we’ve not met in person.

 

hugs and smiles to all

 

Willow

 

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Willow

Hi. Had my coffee this morning when I was greeted by the news that the storm headed up the coast had skipped the part about being a tropical depression and jumped to a tropical storm.  That’s just a hop skip and jump from Hurricane and it was headed right for us.  Well it slipped on shore south of us then tried to sneak up from the land side.  But we escaped with no flooding or wind damage.

 

When coffee was drunk, my wife says to me, can we talk.  Now we’ve had a rocky way to go since I came out to her.  But we are working things out and she wanted to talk about my needs and trying to accept that I am who I am and have needs that even if she is embarrassed by them she has to get past that. Also we can help each other like we have for many years.  
 

A small break through but Rome wasn’t built in a day.

 

Willow 

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Jackie C.

That's great news Willow! Not flattened by a storm, but more importantly your spouse made another step toward acceptance! So happy for you!

 

Hugs!

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Emily michelle
1 hour ago, Willow said:

Hi. Had my coffee this morning when I was greeted by the news that the storm headed up the coast had skipped the part about being a tropical depression and jumped to a tropical storm.  That’s just a hop skip and jump from Hurricane and it was headed right for us.  Well it slipped on shore south of us then tried to sneak up from the land side.  But we escaped with no flooding or wind damage.

 

When coffee was drunk, my wife says to me, can we talk.  Now we’ve had a rocky way to go since I came out to her.  But we are working things out and she wanted to talk about my needs and trying to accept that I am who I am and have needs that even if she is embarrassed by them she has to get past that. Also we can help each other like we have for many years.  
 

A small break through but Rome wasn’t built in a day.

 

Willow 

That’s good news willow. That seems like a big break to me.

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KymmieL
2 hours ago, Willow said:

@Patti Anne @ShawnaLeigh @KymmieL @Jackie C. when the comment was made about being single etc I as just trying to play into the whole I know a secret but I’ll never tell.  I hope I didn’t stir up any controversy.  I just want everyone to be who they are.  Share some good times and ask for help when we need it.  And otherwise use this coffee clutch as a ay to have a good conversation with good friends even those we’ve not met in person.

 

hugs and smiles to all

 

Willow

 

Willow,  no you did not stir the pot. LOL. I started this thread for that reason, for us to have fun, have a conversation about anything. With in the rules of course. We are a family here. and like a family we pick on each other in all good fun.

 

Kymmie

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Tessa

Hi, 

 

Today will be another 9 to 5 grinding out car and credit card extensions. I am noticing more people are paying now and many report getting back to work. This is a good sign. Still no news of my Gap job that was furloughed. I think I’m going to drop a text to my boss for an update. 
 

My trans daughter is having trouble with my ex’s boyfriend. He wants him to mow the lawn. Carters excuse is she has anxiety over loud noises. This could be true because I’ve tried to vacuum once during a visit and he couldn’t handle it. 
 

A CPS case started against my ex for abandoning children. I wasn’t the one who called it was a teacher. My kids are teens. It was moving in my favor until recently. My ex has convinced the lady that the kids are the problem. So she has threatened Carter if she doesn’t obey she could be put in a foster home and I am not an option. I need to speak to this lady and find out the truth. Last time we actually had a visit before Covid she said I was an option. Carter needs to live where she is accepted and loved. This boyfriend is demanding and why is he in this CPS case at all! I guess he’s aloud to be because apparently my ex needs him for support. They have already tried to say I was a bad personal because of being transgender. The lady we worked with broke me she does not look at that. As I try to get to know myself more I have this to deal with. 
 

Lately been dreaming a lot of Trans dreams where I am female. I’m not even thinking about trans things before bed. I talk to my therapist tonight hoping to clear my head. 
 

I can’t let my ex control me or my kids. CPS for that matter. I have to be who I am or I am nobody at all. I’ve been told feelings don’t matter. I wrote in my diary that if feelings don’t matter than I’m a stone and you might as well throw me into the ocean. Feelings do matter because we are human not robots. Why does everyone want to control me? Can’t they just accept who I am? I accept them. NO! It’s a problem that needs fixed. I’m a problem that needs fixed. My family will never understand what it’s like to be Tessa but forced to be someone else when I’m around them. 
 

Washed clothes at Uncles. I use to fold in downstairs but I miss talking to them. So I have become brave and I will fold my clothes upstairs They saw my dresses and mini skirts. My Aunt said it’s ok we won’t judge but I know they don’t fully accept. I lived with them for a year rent free. They knew of my female desires. I felt guilty then and threw away my female clothes but they were soon replaced when I got my own apartment. The room my Aunt let me stay in had some of her old clothes still hanging up. She will never know that I would put on her nightgowns and try on some of her dresses. I know this was probably wrong but it was late and my stuff I threw out. I was glad to get out of that place and on my own but I do miss people. I’m single. 
 

I had a lot on my mind! Up to quite a few chapters in my story. I hope to win the thousand dollars. Well it’s now 5:21 AM. I started writing a little after 4:00 AM. How time flies. 
 

My good friend called me last night but called me male and ended with I’ll call you tomorrow bro. I’ve told him I’m a girl not a boy! I didn’t correct him last night but I will today. Why can’t people just respect you? 
 

Hot bath. I’m going to wear a dress with tights since we have been having colder weather. Yesterday I wore my striped mini skirt. Feels so good to be feminine! Talk to therapist at 6:30 PM. 
 

I know I share a lot because I don’t have anyone else to share things with. Thanks for listening to me. 
 

Love you all!

 

Tess

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Kaltia_Atlas

Good morning. Another day of hot furnaces and waiting on others to get their work done. Really wish I was on HRT already... I hate getting out of bed and out of my comfy clothes! At least the sports bras help with a little pressure. 

 

Have a good day my friends. 😊

 

Hugs ❤️

Kali

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lauraincolumbia

Good morning all,

Another busy day after a night with serious insomnia.   I think i may have only slept 3 or 4 hours..

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Emily michelle
2 hours ago, lauraincolumbia said:

Good morning all,

Another busy day after a night with serious insomnia.   I think i may have only slept 3 or 4 hours..

I hate when that happens I’m just miserable then.

Another day in paradise hopefully today is better than yesterday. I hate being a prick at work but it seems that is the only way I can be if I’m nice there are certain people that take advantage of you. Well see hopefully it’s better they are talking more rain again. Have a good day everyone!

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KymmieL

Morning all, up early for no reason at all. just couldn't get back to sleep. I hate my body.

 

One forecast is 67 another is 72. meteorology isn't really an exact science though.  Starting my 5 days off today. I'm needing it. work has been really stressing me out. Only 5 people to run the front. After my little vacation the manager is canceling all vacations until we get more counter help.

 

May get my grandsons again this weekend. My middle son and his wife are wanting to go camping. so we will be watching my 2 month old grandson, and maybe my 5yr old grandson.

 

Have a great day guys and gals. stay safe and healthy.

Hugs,

 

Kymmie

 

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KayC
13 hours ago, Willow said:

But we are working things out and she wanted to talk about my needs and trying to accept that I am who I am

That's great news, Willow!  I am hoping for the same turnaround with my wife.


@Jackie C. Love your new profile photo, Jackie!  You look great❣️

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Jackie C.

Hey! Just wanted to say THANK YOU! to everybody who loved on my new profile pic. One of the benefits of having an autoimmune disease that attacks my hair follicles is the ability to change up my look when I feel like it. Also it saved me a fortune in electrolysis.

 

Hugs!

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Emily michelle
48 minutes ago, Jackie C. said:

Hey! Just wanted to say THANK YOU! to everybody who loved on my new profile pic. One of the benefits of having an autoimmune disease that attacks my hair follicles is the ability to change up my look when I feel like it. Also it saved me a fortune in electrolysis.

 

Hugs!

Your pic is nice I like it too!

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Sally Stone

 

"… Plucked her eyebrows on the way
Shaved her legs and then he was a she"

 

If only it was that easy, right?  Thought I'd pick a song quote for this morning and let you all try to remember the song name and the artist.  Using a search engine to find the answer is cheating; see if you can recall from memory.  Although, I bet a lot of you "youngsters" may struggle with this one.

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Mx.Drago

Not the greatest of wakenings but it works. Got some sleep and have me sincere cup of Jo at my side, freshly made by me. Have really vivid dreams, and it makes sleeping mentally exhausting but still need sleep.

Got a new bed frame recently, that's a far better improvement then the old one. Sadly it's very flat for me and I'll either need to get a new mattress, or topper. Would love a new side pillow, but maybe later for 4th July sales, if there are any this year.

I have bad allergies, that require I turn in my sleep and my head remains elevated, so I don't have phlegm build up in my chest. Partner still doesn't understand cleaning is important, and I end up having to make the rounds cleaning all the filters. If the weather is very humid and wet, I end up coughing a storm in the morning. So much phlegm, but have had these problems since I was young, it's just getting worse the older I get, so tired.

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TammyAnne
23 hours ago, Susan R said:

Good Morning all. Having a Carmel Pecan cup of Java today. It’s been awhile since I’ve had this flavor. It’s pretty good. It’s an absolutely beautiful day here in the Pacific Northwest. I’m going to spend a day with a old friend of mine in my old stomping grounds on Port Susan here in Snohomish County. It’s a beautiful area. Should be a good time.

 

Susan R🌷

My coffee hasn't kicked in yet.

I read that as "Camel Pecan"?!?!?!?

TA

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ShawnaLeigh

Had a hard night. Little sleep. No pain but I’m a person that tosses and turns all night long and I had to sleep solely on my back with my legs spread open.  So I would start to cramp in my back and felt like restless leg syndrome.  I did not take pain meds at all but by 2am I took some Tylenol PM just to sleep.  
Now coffee is long gone and doing the ice pack thing for a bit.  
It’s difficult to not be packing and organizing with having all this time off.  But lifting is a big no no.  Lol

i hope everyone has a great day!  

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      Liz, I’m sorry this happened to you today. Some people are just very self involved and don’t notice the proper cues no matter how obvious they are to others. They don’t understand how much being correctly gendered means to us. Also, you can rant anytime you want. It’s a very therapeutic release and we all need to do it on occasion.   My Best, Susan R🌷
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      I’m an open book here so it’s completely up to you. The forum is the best place to discuss most things as others can benefit from reading it. If you have a topic or question too personal for the forum, you can PM myself or any of our great staff here anytime. We are always here to help.
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      Welcome Robin, Many of us here have had events in our lives that suddenly cause us to look inward a little more closely than normal. When it’s is a less than gradual event and the result changes you at the core, I call it a trigger....at least that’s how I refer to it in therapy...lol But many of us here have experienced this and it is what leads us to where we are today. My transition started with two such triggers both occurring about a 18 months apart. The last trigger finally got me to a point of needing to finally make a change toward becoming myself. I needed to do what I couldn’t do for over 50 years. It sounds like that might be where you’re at right now. This is where the rubber meets the road and you may decide to make some life changing decisions toward becoming the real you very soon. I wish you the very best on this possible upcoming journey. We are here to help and support you in this in any way we can.   Warmest Regards, Susan R🌷
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      Thank's @Susan R I'd really like to talk about that experience with you, just checking in the best forum/message way of doing that. 🤟
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      Welcome to Trans Pulse, Robin.  Yes, recognizing the truth of who you are and taking that first step are huge milestones, and scary ones.  We've all been there and know how you feel.  You are in a safe place, and among friends who understand.  It is a long road but one successfully traveled by many.  I started my journey at the age of 55, and 11 years later I'm doing fine and am happy.   No one can predict what your path will bring, least of all me.  But we can help out with answers, advice, support and resources.  Ask and ye shall receive.    HUGS   Carolyn Marie
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    • IcamoutofthePANtry
      I have never heard the name Loic Nice and unique! I like it
    • Astrid
      @ElizabethStar Hugs for you, Liz.  Lots of hugs.  Absolutely, you're right to vent about an experience like that.     Astrid
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      Hi @Holly92, nice to meet you. I have likely experienced some of the same things you have. I am also a bisexual woman but that is only part of who I am so we probably have many more differences than likenesses. I would enjoy learning more about those differences if you feel open to sharing them. I’m sure many others here would also. Thanks for sharing a part of yourself today.   Warmest Regards, Susan R🌷
    • Mary Jane
      also im 16
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