It's good to hear you have some close friends you can be out to. Coming out is a very personal experience. It's ok to stay in the closet until you feel you are ready and safe to. In the meantime, cherish the friends who are loving and supportive of you, and the SAGA club, community is important! 💗
I am in a high school that is not totally known for its trans acceptance, but hasn't had any attacks or anything. I am part of the SAGA club (sexuality and gender alliance) there, and it is not like I am super closeted. However, I just can't seem to work up the courage to tell anyone but a very small, close knot group of friends that I am ftm and/or bi. People will just say she/her, and while my euphoria screams "say something!!", my anxiety retorts with "dig yourself a hole and just live there!!" I could realy use some advice on how to get over this.
Well, since I also wanted to share a bit more about myself:
I am bisexual, with a lesbian twin, which makes things a little interesting. She is very involved in the community, being an administrator of her school's pride club. I kinda got into it because of her, which is kind of how I learned that I was trans. Now I am trying to navigate my transition, both physical and social, with quite a bit of resistance from my parents. My mom yells at me whenever I correct her for saying she/her, calling me her daughter or by my deadname. My dad has just kind of taken a break from talking to me, and he is not taking all of this very well. Any advice?
My cousin just sent me this, in reference to me asking how my grandma was dealing with me coming out as trans:
Grandma said that she is supportive and that it's not a choice, it's how you were born and whatever makes you more comfortable. If you really feel like you were meant to be Dillion, then Dillion you will be. She is very supportive. When we are wrapping your one gift grandma picked the specific one because it says "you will never outgrow my heart." And grandma said "I want to write Dillion's name on it because I want him to know that I will be there for him."
And before, I was scared she might disown me! Still haven't mentioned that I'm bi, but plan to soon.
Such wonderful advice from you both, my heart goes out to Belle but I think you both have so much more to offer her in terms of much more recent experience. My kids are in their late 40's and early 50's, so there's been a lot of water under the bridge since I began transition and they were in their 20's then so it was just kind of who cares on their part.
Many years ago I was faced with staying in a marriage that was slowly killing me - for the children's sake - or leaving and trying to build a safe space for my children away from their mother.
It was very difficult but I chose to leave rather than suffer "for the children" knowing that staying only demonstrated for them what an unhealthy relationship looked like.
For nearly a decade it seemed like a disaster, my children taking their anger out on me for hurting their mommy. Then they grew up, made adult decisions, began to appreciate the safe space away from their controlling, clinging, smothering mother.
I have a very good relationship with one child. A not very good relationship with the other, who was damaged emotionally by "mommy".
None of those outcomes were predictable from the initial decision I made, nor were they indicated by the first decade after my decision.
Presuming you decide to do what is best for you - whatever that might be - stay focused on making a good life and creating a good environment for your children. Even if it seems futile, there will come a time...
Busy day today. Went to my wife’s MS Christmas luncheon, did some grocery shopping and just finished baking several dozen cookies. Made triple chocolate Nutella stuffed cookie with macadamia nuts. Tomorrow I make some Turtle cookies. It’s for a baking competition at work on Monday. I haven’t baked in quite some time. Forgot how
much I enjoy it. I hope everyone had a good day. *hugs*
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Well thought today was going to be a better day than it turned out. Work went fine,even getting the front room freight put away before I opened the the door. took about 20 min to do. Good thing Sat is a light freight day. However the backroom freight was still in the cart when I left. The downer I looked into trading my 99 Explorer on a 06 Wrangler. Didn't have enough to put down. God I hate car dealers.
Debra, glad it worked out for you at the funeral. May she rest in peace.