Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

How am I supposed to deal with the kids in my class


Clara

Recommended Posts

Right now I'm still in high school, and I'm taking a welding course at a technical school (unladylike I know, but its a means to an end). The kids in my high school are wonderful, all of them are accepting, using my preferred name, using my pronouns etc. The real problem is the kids in the tech school, they constantly harass me, I often times get things thrown at me (tin foil, paper, welding rods). they are also just nasty to me in general, making comments, acting hostile, patronizing me. I try speaking with the teachers about it but that kind of just makes them dislike me more... Im just getting tired of it...

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Oh hey, I went to technical school in High School too. A million years ago... but it happened. (It was a course in COBOL and RPG II programming if you were curious, we had an IBM System 36 to code on. Why do I remember that?)

 

I have no good advice here. Kids that age are just the worst. The kids that were doing automotive and welding were extra bad. That magical combination of too much testosterone and insufficient supervision just brings out the absolute worse in the male animal at that age. On the plus side, most of them outgrow it. Most of them.

 

Your best bet is to not feed the trolls until they get bored and go back to daring each other into feats of self-mutilation (<-- I so wish I was making this up). It sucks, but if the teacher is unwilling or unable to keep order in the zoo your options are basically quit or suck it up. You might win a little respect that way. Maybe.

 

I so wish I had better advice, but sadly life does not run on after-school-special rules. (Do they still have those? I bet they're just Disney movies now.)

 

Hugs!

Link to comment
  • Admin

If they are throwing the stuff you mention around in an active shop, they are committing industrial safety violations that the teacher MUST correct by Federal OSHA law.  If the teacher reams them out on that point it is the teacher's duty and they can make that point.  I still do "male" stuff including metal work and wood work so it is not anything I would question about your being trans,. Good notice to the screw-up types that they would get fired and kicked from unions for that type of baloney in paid jobs is fine for them.

Link to comment
  • Admin

Clara, ignoring the abuse is dangerous; it could make the other students feel empowered to go even further in their bullying, perhaps as far as physically attacking you.  Second, as Vicky said, what they are doing now is making that "classroom" a dangerous place where you or anyone else standing around might get hurt.

 

What they are doing is bullying you.  I believe that every school in every state has rules and/or education code laws that prohibit bullying.  If the teacher won't look out for you, then you or your parents need to notify the school, in writing, that this is going on, and demand that it be stopped.  Standing up for yourself may not win you many friends, but it will keep you safe(r).

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie

Link to comment

Stand up for yourself but do it in a way that is smart .  If the school has camera , have them through stuff at you so it can be filmed .  The bully in the end is a coward , remember that , cool now in some ways for the small circle they live in ,  but years in the future the real loser of the future .  

Link to comment
On 11/4/2019 at 4:07 PM, VickySGV said:

If they are throwing the stuff you mention around in an active shop, they are committing industrial safety violations that the teacher MUST correct by Federal OSHA law.

My teacher has corrected it, they have stopped it in the shop and has now been relegated to the classroom, had a piece of breaad hit me in the back of the neck

Link to comment
  • 2 weeks later...
On 11/5/2019 at 9:22 PM, Clara said:

My teacher has corrected it, they have stopped it in the shop and has now been relegated to the classroom, had a piece of breaad hit me in the back of the neck

is there any way for you to report this to a higher staff, like the principal? this should never happen to anyone. if the school doesn't deal with it, try your parents/carers if you can, or there is usually a committee thing for anti-bullying somewhere

 

good luck ?

Link to comment
  • 3 months later...

I remember those horrible  times... I ended up dropping out of school, getting a GED, then finishing my diploma in Adult School then went on to a community college then University majoring in CS.

 

My heart goes out to you; I feel what you're going through since this very thing happened from the 4th grade onward. I wouldn't recommend going my route since one loses valuable time accomplishing goals, but I highly recommend using the existing powers that be to fight the battles for you if possible because the important thing is for you not to be isolated (they're hoping you'll do just that so it makes tormenting you easier). It's a power game, so it's important to have the rules and institutional power on your side so you can use them. Be strategic and learn all your options. Document everything, and like one person said: use the cameras to your advantage. Evidence is important.

 

Trust me when I say that this sort of skill will be critical once you're in the workforce, as unfortunately bullying doesn't end in school. Those who understand the rules the best, while acquiring allies ultimately win the power game.

 

It might sound weird, but allow yourself moments alone where you can express your frustration. Before I used to bottle up my emotions, as they were often used against me, but that only caused long-term damage that I am still trying to recover from. Take moments to draw, write, cry, meditate, and so on. Allow yourself to process and to feel.

Link to comment
On 11/14/2019 at 4:56 PM, AnnaD said:

is there any way for you to report this to a higher staff, like the principal? this should never happen to anyone. if the school doesn't deal with it, try your parents/carers if you can, or there is usually a committee thing for anti-bullying somewhere

 

good luck ?

I agree with appealing to higher up the authority ladder, but do so in writing, such as an email or registered mail. If, god forbid, the higher ups do nothing, you'll have documentation of the harrassment and your attempts to get the staff to do their jobs if things get bad enough to litigate. 

Link to comment

Or, if you're in a passive aggressive mood, you could cc a local lawyer's office. 

Link to comment
  • Admin

Just a reminder to folks that this thread is four months old, and the OP hasn't posted again in that time span.

 

Carolyn Marie

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   5 Members, 0 Anonymous, 198 Guests (See full list)

    • Adrianna Danielle
    • awkward-yet-sweet
    • KayC
    • Maddee
    • VickySGV
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.8k
    • Total Posts
      769.7k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,077
    • Most Online
      8,356

    gender_equality_nccu
    Newest Member
    gender_equality_nccu
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Billie75B
      Billie75B
      (67 years old)
    2. Chloe Cloud
      Chloe Cloud
      (32 years old)
    3. Hannah Emma
      Hannah Emma
      (41 years old)
    4. Joan Arbour
      Joan Arbour
      (77 years old)
    5. Liz B
      Liz B
      (49 years old)
  • Posts

    • Adrianna Danielle
      Did go in my shop and fix my truck,new front brakes.I got that done before it got worse.Luckily I did not drive it when it first started.Drove my car to work instead
    • Willow
      @KymmieL do they have you on anti depressants?  Are they certain they are the right ones for you?  Has a psychiatrist been involved?  My physician first put me on an anti depressant and when things got worse for me he added one that was the initial cause of my cancer.  My therapist recommended I had a different need changed things. My psychiatrist agreed with the particular underlying condition and the choice of medications.   everyone is different but if one medication isn’t working there are many different types and different underlying conditions that require different treatments.  No meds mentioned because what didn’t work and what did all depends on your case, not mine.   Willow
    • Cynthia Slowan
      To me loving myself means having the courage to live the way I want and to be me.     I hardly ever really like how I look but I feel good knowing I am trying to be the best version of myself that I can be. It is definitely a struggle sometimes though.  💗Cynthia 
    • Cynthia Slowan
      When I am sitting out on my patio in a nice pretty dress, full makeup, with a glass of wine watching a storm roll in!       💗 Cynthia 
    • Cynthia Slowan
      I had a five hour road trip today.  I’m trying to grow my hair out so I just pushed it back with a pink hair band, lipstick and gloss, no makeup.    White spaghetti strap top, short black skirt, white sandals with pink toenails!  A couple of rings and bracelets, necklace and hoop earrings.   I felt like a hot mess but it’s my favorite way to travel!  
    • KymmieL
      Glad you had a good day, @Willow Mine on the other hand sucked. I have been screwing up again, I even got written up. I may have to educate them on major depression and disability. not that it will work.    OH, well. May be another job I lost because of me. Yes, my depression is about down at the magma level   Kym
    • Lydia_R
      This bag is really working out for me.  I had worn out the back on my yin-yang bag so I picked this one up.  It wasn't long before I cut off the flap on it and braided a hemp strap for it.  The zipper is the best feature.  I can spin the bag around and I'm not afraid of losing anything.  I've taught myself to keep all the essential things in it and nothing more.  Here is what made the cut:   Notepad Sharpie Ballpoint Pen Teaspoon Glasses Phone (most of the time) Wired Headphones and/or Bluetooth Carmex and/or Lipstick Flash Drive Current Braiding Project Wallet Hair Clip   And on my keys I have my one inch Swiss Army Knife with scissors and a bottle opener that I like using with mason jar lids.   I don't miss pockets at all now.  The bag is fun and practical.  I can set it on the ground to get everything off my body.  If I need something, I'm looking for a fairly large object.  I always have something to work on with the braiding project.
    • Ivy
      Just keep up with your blood work
    • Abigail Genevieve
      You can ask a moderator to make the change for you.
    • missyjo
      started Spiro very recently..told to expect it like Lasix  you'll pee, a lot. have some other complications so we're taking this cautiously . heard something about slightly higher risk for OA too. hugs to all. 
    • MAN8791
      Mine was Hatshepsut, an Egyptian pharaoh who had to carry herself as a male in order to rule. I was completely facinated by her as a student.
    • Willow
      Well it was a good day at work I got everything done I needed to do. My audits came out right and everything.  I had to fix the printer on one pump. It wouldn’t cut the paper and needed two parts replaced.  The District Manager left us Thank you bags,  Murphy Bucks and candy.  We can use Murphy bucks to buy things in the store, or pay for gas.  I guess next week the Area Manager will be around to check on things.  He would be the next layer higher.  Well my eyelids are starting to get heavy, time for a nap.thats the only thing about opening the store it definitely causes me to need a nap.    
    • Vidanjali
      Interesting point. I was raised Catholic and was intensely intrigued by the lives of saints. Similar to your obsession with Mulan, I was particularly drawn to Joan of Arc, a 15th century saint who took on the guise of a man to lead the French army to victory over the English in the Hundred Years' War. Later, she was sold out by the Burgundians to the English who brought multiple charges against her as a heretic, including claiming she could communicate directly with God (which undermined the church's authority), and wearing men's clothes. At one point, while imprisoned, she was made to dress in women's clothes, which she did, but was later found again in men's attire which she said she preferred. She was eventually burnt at the stake at age 19. Rather gruesome tale, but not atypical of the stories of Catholic martyrs. 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I just read something a FB friend posted about guilt.  I am changing it somewhat for here.   There are things you should not feel guilty about because they are not wrong.  Being transgender is one. People like to send us on guilt-trips about it, intentionally or unintentionally.   There are things you have actual guilt about whether you feel guilty or not.  If you murder someone, you may not feel any guilt.   The FEELING of guilt can be widely separated from objective guilt. All of us need to train ourselves to not feel guilty about things we are not guilty of,, and to feel guilty about the things we are guilty of.  It is not easy.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Jeans, t-shirt, flip-flops.

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...