Sounding My Age

[Guest Eth]

I'm back to working on my voice. I need this so badly. I know it'll make me a lot happier and help to get me out of the miserable state I've been in lately. I think that if I could just sound like what I want to sound like, then I'd be able to express myself more when I'm speaking to, say, my parents, my therapist, and stuff like that. I'd just like to not get weird looks when I order a cheeseburger, and stuff. Well at least not for my voice.

I sent a voice clip to my therapist at her request the other day. She and I both agree that I sound too young when I speak en femme. I definitely can get to where I sound female... I just sound nine years old, too. My question is- has anyone else experienced this problem, and what did you do to fix it? I need to sound my age (which is 15- 16 in October) so I don't like, just seem creepy every time I say teenage stuff, lol. So if anyone has any advice, please let me know. Thanks!

愛 Eth

[Sally]

Good Morning Eth,

I haven't heard your voice to know what it sounds like now but I can tell you tha most of us tend to aim for a pitch that is way too high.

You could probably drop it back down a little closer to your male voice and just add the inflections of typical women's speech patterns.

The 9 year old sound is basically just a little too high so try for something half way between your male voice and where your female voice is now and see how that sounds to you.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Eth]

Thanks for the advice Sally. I've heard that before- that I need to go lower, or bring more of my male voice into it. I've been trying that A LOT but with no luck. Every time I try to go lower, or "bring more of the male voice into it", I just sound either like a weird boy, or like my voice is harsh and raspy. I can sound totally female now pretty easily, it's just... way too young. I have no idea how to make that older since every time I try to go deep, it totally messes up (and I've been trying for weeks now to lower it or bring some male back into it with no success at all).

I'll see if I can upload a voice clip here of what my voice sounds like now.

愛 Eth

[Guest Elizabeth K]

Voice!

Wow - I have my female voice but it is too soft. I am working on projection. Sally is partially right - we tend to try too high in the range as a consistant voice. A womans voice is all over the range where a man's is more monotone. Try talking like you were singing a song. Drop the lower range a bit. And try for a more forceful projection.

Just some ideas.

Lizzy

[Sally]

Eth,

This is the whole trick - it sounds too simple but don't be fooled it takes practice.

When you lower the pitch - do not bring one aspect of your male voice into it - the chest resonance!

Women talk more forward in the throat than men do and the resonance is in the head some refer to it as nasal - keep the back of the throat and the chest out of the sound board for your female voice.

See how it feels when you are talking in the female voice and keep that feel as you slightly lower the pitch, don't do it all at once, slowly and have patience that is the key as always.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Eth]

Okay, I deleted the last voice sample I had up (from my 2 months of recording thing. It's been about 2.5 weeks since then and I've gotten a bit better) and I'm uploading a current one now. I just read out loud the first paragraph of this post. Tell me what you think please, and what I should do to make it better.

Also thanks for all the advice so far. I'll try that with the male voice without the chest thing.

愛 Eth

[Guest mynw]

Hi Eth:

one things that giving good result,,

that we call box throat training for songs,

what are giving you good control to your sound levels,,

and it will making your practice more easy,,

there are CDs,books,and trainers,,

also you can doing that through CDs,and working on your home

like beautiful Bulbul(small cute bird).

I know that cause I like to song,with harp,,

good luck

honey

love

[Guest Eth]

I can't get any CDs or videos due to my parents.

愛 Eth

[Sally]

I think that lowering the pitch about a third will do it - for non musical people remember the song do a deer.

do, re, me, fa, so, la, ti, do starting at your current pitch as the upper do work down to la!

I hope that makes sense.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Evan_J]

Actually there was another teen that submitted a voiceclip and sounded 9 (I think it was Monica?) . Anyway, the truth is some young genetic girls (teenagers) do sound "9". Its going to develop as you enter adulthood. Remember that. Also, "do what Sally says" lol . She's real good about voice

[Guest Eth]

Okay, here's a second clip now. Please let me know what you think of this one; is it more age-appropriate for me?

It was harder to do. I'd have to practice a lot before I'll be able to do this without any trouble. The other one I can keep going like a smooth melody, but this one feels like it's just barely touching the edge between male and female, and any slip means it'll sound like a guy again. I did have to record this a few times because I slipped- especially at the "laugh" (you can hardly tell I'm laughing. It's sad) at the end.

Please let me know what you think, like if I should pursue this course and practice until I can use this voice without trouble.

愛 Eth

[Sally]

That is much better you're past 13 now!

Seriously that is a lot better as you practice it try to use some of the lower tones I think that the top end is as high as you would ever need so that's fine now just add a few lower variations when you speak = not a lot because that is pretty good right now.

Good work in such a short time.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Eth]

Thanks Sally ^^.

It'll be tough to get it quite right ... I need to find some way to stay on that line without going under. If I go under, I'll sound male. On the other hand, if I go over, I'll sound like a nine year old. It's a big balancing act... I'll just have to figure it out.

愛 Eth

[Guest Eth]

I'm still having some trouble getting the right sound. I can't seem to go lower at all without sounding male, and I'm not sure what to do. I can sing incredibly smoothly and when I do that my voice sounds just fine, but for some reason I can't translate that into speaking. It's weird.

I can speak in a fairly high pitched voice but again I sound 9 years old. Does anyone have any suggestions on what I should do?

愛 Eth

[Sally]

OK, this is going to sound very weird - it did when it was mentioned to me but the best way to keep that male resonance out of your voice is to imagine the sound is rminating from the tip of your nose not in the throat at al.

It is strange but it does keep your focus away from your chest and throat.

Try it.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Eth]

Well, it helps a little bit by pulling it back into the female range... but it also makes it sound young again. I don't get it, it's like the lower I go, I sound older but also more male. The higher I go, the more I sound female, but the younger I sound. I'm not sure I CAN sound like I'm 15 and female at the same time.

>_<

愛 Eth

[Guest Jeannine Bean]

Well, it helps a little bit by pulling it back into the female range... but it also makes it sound young again. I don't get it, it's like the lower I go, I sound older but also more male. The higher I go, the more I sound female, but the younger I sound. I'm not sure I CAN sound like I'm 15 and female at the same time.

Here's something I notice...

Sometimes my girlfriend will talk pretty low, especially if she's relaxed and breathing deeply. She normally has a voice slightly on the high end for a 6' 1" tall woman, IMHO. The thing is, as she gets lower she gets breathier and huskier. Also, most women don't make consonant sounds as hard as men do..

For lower voiced female examples... Listen to Patti Smith Sing When Doves Cry, LOL.

--Jeannine

[Guest Rain]

Well, it helps a little bit by pulling it back into the female range... but it also makes it sound young again. I don't get it, it's like the lower I go, I sound older but also more male. The higher I go, the more I sound female, but the younger I sound. I'm not sure I CAN sound like I'm 15 and female at the same time.

>_<

愛 Eth

To be honest sounding of age is in the ear of the beholder. I have heard all kinds of grown female voices, some sounding like there voice box did not continue to grow with their body. Then of course you the other spectrum, where their voices are almost as low as the average man. I understand your voice has to pass, but I am just saying voices are so different in every shape and form. Your voice really is not bad, the only thing is can you use to project. I am pretty sure you will be there in no time.

[Guest Eth]

Thanks everyone.

Problem is.. I can't live with a deep voice. I'm "well, that's kind of sucky" if I have to have a high voice, but I absolutely CAN'T deal with a deep one. It doesn't fit me and I don't like it.

This is more about me feeling comfortable with myself, than me passing to anyone. Of course, with what I want, yeah it'd pass, but that's just an added 'bonus'. To me it's all about being happy with the sound *I* hear coming from me.

So yeah, I know there are women out there with very husky voices, and girls out there with very very high pitched voices, but I don't want either of those. If I'm going to be practicing so hard, I should get something at least close to what I want, right?

愛 Eth

[Guest Jeannine Bean]

Thanks everyone.

Problem is.. I can't live with a deep voice. I'm "well, that's kind of sucky" if I have to have a high voice, but I absolutely CAN'T deal with a deep one. It doesn't fit me and I don't like it.

This is more about me feeling comfortable with myself, than me passing to anyone. Of course, with what I want, yeah it'd pass, but that's just an added 'bonus'. To me it's all about being happy with the sound *I* hear coming from me.

So yeah, I know there are women out there with very husky voices, and girls out there with very very high pitched voices, but I don't want either of those. If I'm going to be practicing so hard, I should get something at least close to what I want, right?

愛 Eth

In my last post I meant women don't usually make vowels as hard as men do. I teach English, I should get that right.

From reading your posts, it sounds like you're being kind of hard on yourself. My girlfriend, as I said, I think has a quite high voice for a 6'1" cisgendered woman. But when she talks low, she has certain characteristics.... Not that she has a low voice.

humans have a wide range of ways of speaking. Neil Young sings higher than most women talk, and certainly higher than Patti Smith or Joan Jett BUT he sounds unmistakeably like a man.... and my girlfriend will sound low and husky if she's relaxed ... and sound like a woman. Patti Smith on When Doves cry actually sounds like a man to me... and Cher sometimes sounds a bit androgynous to me. Or for that matter, Kate Bush is very feminine in my opinion but sometimes she could pass for a throaty male singer. (Running up that hill) "and if I could, I'd make a deal with God" some parts sound like a Neil Young-ish man to me.

It's all about resonance and breathing, as well as methods of inflection... and a woman will often sound a lot like a man if she breathes into her belly and speaks from her chest.

But in my opinion you should take your time in order to get there faster. You're speaking in really absolute black and white terms about things in a way that sounds to me as if you're boxing yourself into a tight space. No one sounds as natural and good when they're uptight...

--Jeannine

[Guest Leigh]

well....i can't give technique advice, but what i listened to, your tone sounds good, and i think that once you practice and get some more control over inflection you will be solid. best of luck, love.

peace&love

leigh