Why Me?

[Sally]

This has nothing to do with why am I trans - no this is about my eating problem.

Most of my friends get depressed and cannot eat - I however eat when I am depressed, lonely, bored, happy, hungry oh let's just face it - when I am awake I am foraging for food.

I am doing pretty well with what I am eating but I don't know how good it is to eat a prepared salad that says 5 servings in two meals.

I guess I am asking if anyone has any suggestions on what else to do - I don't drink or smoke or anything else - I can be on here with a sandwich in one hand so it is not the answer - I even munch while talking on skype - it must annoy the other folks but I cannot seem to stop.

Any advice would be appreciated.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Lynnx]

This has nothing to do with why am I trans - no this is about my eating problem.

Most of my friends get depressed and cannot eat - I however eat when I am depressed, lonely, bored, happy, hungry oh let's just face it - when I am awake I am foraging for food.

I am doing pretty well with what I am eating but I don't know how good it is to eat a prepared salad that says 5 servings in two meals.

I guess I am asking if anyone has any suggestions on what else to do - I don't drink or smoke or anything else - I can be on here with a sandwich in one hand so it is not the answer - I even munch while talking on skype - it must annoy the other folks but I cannot seem to stop.

Any advice would be appreciated.

Love ya,

Sally

When i realize i'm stuffing my face without cause, i switch to "stuffing my face" with low calorie drinks... coffee... tea... or any low cal/ diet drink you can buy. Perhaps not as satisfying, but you're still putting something in your mouth.

[Guest ~Brenda~]

Sally my dear

As with so many things, we first have to admit that something is not right.

You have done that.

Your over-eating is the same for those who drink and/or smoke.

Something is bothering you, and food is your way of dealing with it.

I don't have any answers for you, but I would make a suggestion.

The next time you feel like eating, ask yourself....

"Am I really hungry?"

"When was the last time I ate?"

"Which meal is this then if I am going to eat now?" - You should only need three meals a day (breakfast, lunch, dinner). Only one of those meals can be heavy. The other meals should be light.

"Why do I feel that I need to eat now?"

Sally, the following is a typical day for me with respect to food.

breakfast - typically just fruit - apple, orange, or a banana.

lunch - typically a huge ceasar salad (I love those salads)

dinner - typically a sandwich of some type.

Thats it. That is what I eat on a typical day. Now, if I go out with my co-workers to a pizza place and we have pizza for lunch, I'll skip dinner entirely.

I hope this helped a little. At the very least, please know that I care about you

Love

Brenda

[Guest Donna Jean]

Well, Sally......

You know what and how I eat and I wouldn't expect you to eat that way....

Back when I was trying to lose weight I turned to sugarless gum...It's satisfies the "sweetie" that I crave and gives my mouth something to do so I'm not craving food.

But, that is just a "trick" to help.....

What is needed is a complete overhaul ...a change in your entire life...

I changed my entire way of eating so that now I enjoy the things that I eat....and I do not crave the old things...

T bone steak? I used to love those...can't even eat one anymore...I'm not a vegetarian, but I do eat mostly veggies and fruits.

It's not easy to do, Sally....but, it is doable...

With much love....

Dee Jay

[Guest Alex Blitzen]

*hugs*

It's a vicious circle... you eat because you are depressed, and you are depressed because of your eating habits. I would suggest a nutritionist if you can get to one. I've recently got one and I am on track with eating throughout the day instead of trying to starve myself.

Also...

Identify what triggers your eating habits the most. In order to stop doing something you have to understand it. If you realize exactly what triggers it, it will be easier to fight it.

Eat slowly and eat 5 small meals a day... cut up vegetables are a good snack. Vegetables have less sugar than fruit. Cucumbers are good because they have very low calories and carbohydrates. Almonds are high in protein and fiber so those are also a good thing.

Scheduling your meals can also help. Setting a general time when you should eat.

Find something that you enjoy doing. When you feel like eating, when it isn't a meal time, do that instead.

Of course it will be difficult, but you are strong. I know you can do it *hugs* I hope this helps.

[Carolyn Marie]

Sally, there have already been some great suggestions.

I'll add just a couple more.

As you know I'm diabetic. I have been told that it is much better to eat 3-4 small meals or snacks during

the day than wait until you are really hungry and then binge. So perhaps scheduling such small snacks

during the day, and keeping to just those scheduled snacks, might help. I know that is harder to do while

at work, but its possible.

The second suggestion is to switch to very low-calorie snacks, like fruit or vegetables. That would satisfy

your need to masticate (OK, no complaints please. It just means chewing ), will fill your tummy,

and still not put weight on.

I'm not sure about accepting any advice from the Popsicle Queen about proper diet (Yes DJ, I do mean you )

Carolyn Marie

[Guest Donna Jean]

I'm not sure about accepting any advice from the Popsicle Queen about proper diet (Yes DJ, I do mean you )

Carolyn Marie

Hey, Carolyn!

I'll have you know those Popsicles are calorie free!

Basically flavored, colored ice with no calories...

I especially like the Asparagus flavored ones!

Yummy!

Donna Jean...The Popcicle Queen

[Guest Elizabeth K]

Ask Dee Jay about the watermelon and anchovie flavored popsickle. It is so awful it takes forever to finish one, therefore cutting back on intake.

Seriously (yes seriously - a mod to mod serious exchange - they do happen!)

Sally?

A million suggestions! If one size fit all there would only be one thin book in the store shelf under DIETING.

Opinions, like rear-end somethings, everyone has one. Same with diets.

My opinion (AHAH - you KNEW that was coming):

Dieting? Doesn't really work, what happens is you have to change your lifestyle to accomidate what you feel is a better body size for you. This is NOT dieting, it is behavior modification - DANG HARD TO ACCOMPLISH! HARD HARD HARD!

Okay - that said...

Helpful things that augment this decision:

(1) Either watch calories, or fat, or carbohydrates. You CANNOT watch them all at the same time or you will just have to survive on water and air! Try to find which work best for you.

Personally, I found almost no carbs, and NO processed foods (sugars , white rice, white breads) works best for me for losing weight - and limiting their intake (NO WHITE SUGAR EVER) works as maintenance. Also, logic must be used. For example a woman's metabolishn (you are on HRT now) is different froma man's. Research what works for your height/weight/body type. Personally - to lose weight I have to go from a 2000 calories (male) to a 1200 calories (female) daily intake - for my height and weight - which is hard, because my mind is set on no carbs - not calories. Difficult to trnslate sometimes.

You must become a label reader - on EVERYTHING

(2) Exercise - daily type? nope - walking 2 miles is good - but you need 30 minutes a day of airobic exercise to lose weight. It triples the effectiveness of your change in eating habits. And really, joining a gym for a short time, getting a trainer and finding out what works for you - then doing it on your own - MAY be necessary.

(3) I also learned, you cannot skip items you crave! But you have to eat just a 10th - or find a substitute (fresh fruit, sugarless gum, and protein in nut and other non-fat forms). And there are 'empty calorie' items (potato chips, dip) - spend your food allowance on the good stuff that you love. Eat a slice of ham instead of a bag of chips!

And buy GOOD TASTING foods that are diet related - don't try to buy at cheap prices, and try to cut down. Buy premium ham insstead of bargain ham, for example. Maybe the food budget hurts - but try buying 1/3 of what you usually do , but goooood stuff you look forward to eating? That really motivates... and I am not talking about premium fudge instead of Miss Debbie! NO EMPTY CALORIES.

(4) Contrary to common sense - eat when you are hungry - especially when training yourself to new eating habits, BUT don't eat any really large meals, and consider what you already ate as a part of your basic meal. Yikes that hurts making you consider snacks verrrrrry carefully.

(5) Shrink your stomach gradually - don't go for the gold - it takes about a month to reasonably half your intake.

(6) You can check you weight - but DONT set a target weight because once you reach it you will feel you can slack off. You can generally weigh to see if things are moving up OR down - which is going to happen - and SLOWLY adjust to see what is needed to balance out.

(7) DON"T CHEAT - ever! This is hard at restarurants, and parties, and when with others. Your biggest problem? Someone brings in a really good dessert ot snack to work or at a meeting. DON"T YIELD

(8) Have fat friends - they make you look thinner!

It takes fine tuning - get where there is a consistand weight loss going on - never more than a pound a week, once you get established - and that makes it doable.

Sally - this isn't personal and is addressed to everyone who isn't a skinny-minnie. I have no idea what will work for you, personally - I just wish you the best.

Lizzy

[Sally]

(8) Have fat friends - they make you look thinner!

Now I am beginning to understand why you and Dee Jay want me around!

I would like to thank everyone for their suggestions and I do appreciate them all, I will work on this and get it fine tuned - I like the trim it down slowly idea, but I have been doing it way too slowly.

Alex, I appreciate your kind words but most of the time I do not feel very strong at all - I do know a nutritionist and I may talk to her - it will mean telling her that I am on HRT if she is going to be able to help.

The watermelon and anchovy Popsicles are not too bad if you add some jalapeno peppers and salsa but they tend to melt really fast! !

I am seriously considering having salsa around the house with celery to dip it instead of tortilla chips - it works for those skinny model types but I am never going to be able to consider one Tic-Tac as a meal!

Thank you all so much.

And Brenda - admitting something isn't right is the first step in correcting any problem even in discovering your gender issues.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Naomi Stardust]

...um... what Lizzy said...

also try to only replace one food at a time

get used to eating carrot sticks or almonds instead of chips

then move on to replacing soda with iced tea

or whatever

and refer back to Lizzy's response any time you feel your will power slipping

love you

Naomi