Legally Changing My Name Before Transition?

[Guest Cricket]

So, I am going to start school in a few weeks as I have posted in the FtM forum. In case you haven't read it, I have to wear my school ID at all times (it acts as a key into various buildings and we get random security checks because the campus is not in the safest area). I will be able to get Xander written on it, but my birth name will have to be above it, like this:

Lady Name

(Xander)

Last Name

The problem is that my first name is REALLY girly unless you live in Medieval France. It was considered masculine back then but most people today don't really know that, so it's not like I can say "Oh, my parents are French" as if that will explain it.I wasn't sure what to do when I posted yesterday, but I do have a little money squirreled away for a convention coming up and I'm thinking of putting that toward the fees for a legal name change instead. Then I can get just Xander and my last name written on my ID.

I haven't been able to find any concrete information online, just forms that I can buy to download. I'm keeping my last name the same, because my parents have been really great working with me through all of this and I want to keep that connection to them, just changing my first and middle names. I'm going to talk to my therapist about all this next week. The only thing is, while she has had experience working with transgendered people, she is not a certified gender therapist, so I don't really know if she can help me with this in particular (I AM planning on seeing one in the future, just no regular in flow of monies right now and I can see the one I have now for free). I'm going to call her tomorrow to ask though.

I was born in a different state than I live in now, and I can't find anything saying whether or not I can change it here (I've been living here for two years) or if I have to go back to the state where I was born. Some things are registered there (birth certificate, bank account, for example) and some here (voter's card, ID, etc). I know I won't be able to change my gender on my ID or birth certificate or anything until I get surgery, but I'm okay with that. I also usually fly once a year to visit family, will this cause a problem? (Having a male name but female gender mark, while hopefully passing as male.) When I fly should I just be a lady with a guy's name (which is not uncommon) to avoid confusion or should I be Xander there as well?

I know for certain that this is the name I want and that sometime in the future when my finances are more stable I am going to start HRT and eventually get at least top surgery, and hopefully bottom if the options have gotten better at the time I have the money. I am completely certain that this is what I want and I don't care how long it takes for me to get there. I guess what I'm asking is this; is it a good idea to change my name now or would it cause more problems worse than the one I'm trying to solve? And what do I do to get it changed? Does anyone have any websites to suggest where I can find real information about the process? Where to go, where to get the forms, who to talk to, if I have to go back and do it through the state I was born in? I know it's uncommon (or at least I think it is) to get your name changed before HRT, but my looks and mannerisms pass as male and I'm getting better with my voice, too. I am going to talk to Student Services about everything on Monday but for legal purposes my legal name has to be on my ID (I understand why, even though I'm not happy about it). But if I change my legal name to what I want to be called, I can get that on my ID instead. I just want to know what I'm getting into before I make a rash decision and the best way of going about all this.

Any help or suggestions would be appreciated! Thanks everyone. =)

[Guest Evan_J]

Whether and when you change names is actually up to you Many guys do it before physically transitioning. Some at the very start. The fact that you actually are a minor doing it (at least where I live) would be an advantage to you. Not just cuz you'd enjoy having it on your ID and peeps callin you that either. Because its EASIER to change the name of a minor than an adult. A lot of states have extra requirements and stuff you gotta do if you are an adult. Basically, for minors, one parents consent is whats called for. The fee. Filing out some papers (name , address, whats the old name, what name do ya want). And showing up the day they grant it. THATS IT. Yes there's a line that says "why do you want to change it?" but an answer as simple as "because I prefer it" is sufficient esp since you're not on T AND are a minor.

[Guest Donna Jean]

YEP! Evan has it...as usual...

Being a minor ..getting a name change is easier...

The problem with being an adult and doing it is that they want to make sure that you aren't doing it for the wrong reasons...

Like, skipping out on bills and other obligations...and to make sure that you're not changing it to avoid the law some how...

Although, I do think it's a far stretch to change one's name from Don to Donna just to beat a Visa Card bill....

Donna Jean

[Guest angie]

You can go to the court house and ask for the paper work

to have your name change.Do all the foot work,pay the fee,

go before the judge,and taaa daa,you will then be Xander.

Took two weeks.

I have a good FTM friend that did his recently.

He isn't worried about the marker yet,as long as his name reflects

who he is,he is a happy man.

[Guest Batsu Maru Otoko Yo!]

I didn't even go to the courthouse, ehehe. I just went to my district's website and found the document there. I filled it out, mailed it in with a check for $39, waited to hear back about my court date...you just go in front of the judge and tell them 'no I'm not trying to dodge debt, the law, or anything else'.

Easy-peasy! And my mom's friend paid for it, as my birthday present.

I can't think of any reason to put it off, if you can afford it. It's a pretty amazing feeling, to have your name be YOUR name.

[Guest Melanieshaman]

good to know this info... as i am not ready yet..but really feel like i am not far off. Definitely need voice work before i go full time.

Melanie

[Guest harvester52]

I did my name change about a year ago. It's different for every county. I didn't have to go before a judge. I went to the courthouse, got the paperwork, paid the filing fee, then had to post it for 14 days on a bulletin board in the courthouse. After the fourteen days, the judge signed the first decree as there were no objections, then I had to post it for another 14 days. After that, I received my certificate of change of name in the mail (the paper to take to the DMV, the bank, etc. to change all my documents over.) It was a relatively easy process, just lengthy (and expensive! $104.00 total!)

I'm in Clackamas County, OR so it might be different for anywhere else. When I lived in Clark Co. WA and was looking into it, it was only $50 and you had to stand before the judge. I would go to your local County circuit court and ask the information person there. That's what I did, worked like a charm.

-BC

[Guest Cricket]

Thanks so much everyone for the quick replies! Actually, I know I seem really young in the way I talk, but I'm 24 so am definitely an adult. xD I don't have any debts or anything, and no criminal record, although I DO have a loan out for school right now. I hope that won't be a problem since I won't have any payment due for about two years and am willing to follow up with it so they can have my new name and track me down after I finish school. I'm still trying to figure out the fee, but if it's under $45 (fingers crossed) I'm going to definitely do it! I know I will have to get a new ID which will be another $20, and it seems from my research I can get a new social with my name on it without a fee. The courts are closed now but I am going to call my circuit court first thing tomorrow and figure out just what I need to do (rather than running around in circles and it taking longer.)

I'm really excited about this. Thanks everybody!! =D

[Guest Evan_J]

I didn't even go to the courthouse, ehehe. I just went to my district's website and found the document there. I filled it out, mailed it in with a check for $39, waited to hear back about my court date...you just go in front of the judge and tell them 'no I'm not trying to dodge debt, the law, or anything else'.

Easy-peasy! And my mom's friend paid for it, as my birthday present.

I can't think of any reason to put it off, if you can afford it. It's a pretty amazing feeling, to have your name be YOUR name.

Why do I live in a place where this is so expensive? $150.00 +$30.00 sheriffs fees +$50.00 posting fee in the legal news. Why? (and no, there are no fee waivers , they don't care how poor you are. They're like if you can afford to want it changed you can afford to pay for it)

[Guest angie]

I'm really excited about this. Thanks everybody!! =D

Smiiiiiiile...Your welcome Cricket.

Hugs and good journey,

Angelique

[Guest Liam]

Why do I live in a place where this is so expensive? $150.00 +$30.00 sheriffs fees +$50.00 posting fee in the legal news. Why? (and no, there are no fee waivers , they don't care how poor you are. They're like if you can afford to want it changed you can afford to pay for it)

Dude. Mine cost $355 to file, plus $120 to post in the newspaper for four weeks. It was absolutely ridiculous. And there were fee waivers, but you basically had to be receiving government assistance to qualify.

Good luck, Xander! I hope it goes well.

[Guest Cricket]

Oh man, I am such a sad panda right now. =( Once I add all the fees up it's going to over $500 (not including a new ID or social or anything!)! So I'm not going to be able to do it any time soon. My plan is just to squirrel away $10 here and $20 whenever I can ...so it's looking more like it will be the end of the year, ish, depending on what my other expenses end up being between now and then. And it takes about 8 weeks. Argh!!! At least now I know so I can start saving up for it. Sigh. Thanks again everyone, though.

[Guest mrgeof2m1991]

I have been looking into this myself. And what I would need. A FtM friend of mine gave this link that was helpful, but it would still be good to talk to someone about it.

http://etransgender.com/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=33

It should have every state listed.

Good luck.

[Guest NatalieRene]

I didn't even go to the courthouse, ehehe. I just went to my district's website and found the document there. I filled it out, mailed it in with a check for $39, waited to hear back about my court date...you just go in front of the judge and tell them 'no I'm not trying to dodge debt, the law, or anything else'.

Easy-peasy! And my mom's friend paid for it, as my birthday present.

I can't think of any reason to put it off, if you can afford it. It's a pretty amazing feeling, to have your name be YOUR name.

That's what I'm planning to do in a couple of months. Although rather then going before a judge I'm hoping that I can just include a short letter to the judge along with my application that says, yes I have a mortgage, car loan, and a student loan and that my changing my first name is not in any way me trying to get out of my debts and I still intend to pay without interruption of the monthly payments. Hopefully it won't complicate things.

[Guest angie]

If you are planning on spending 500 dollars...

Why not just go through a lawyer? Let them

take care of everything but SSI,which only

takes your time.And the new DL is only for

the cost of a new one.JW

Angie

[Guest Girl Emily]

Cricket,

Because the constitution guarantees equal protection poor people are alowed to file lawsuits and other legal filings such as a petition for name change. You request from the clerk of the court for the foms used to file "in forma pauperis." It is a Latin yerm that means in the form of a pauper. I am going to court tomorrow and will be filing my petition for name change in forma pauperis. The only money I need to dish out will be to have the motion to show cause published in an ajudicated weekly newspaper four weeks in a row. The cheapest I found was $65 and the hearing will take place between 4 and 8 weeks, usually around 6 weeks to allow the newspaper to send verification of publication to the clerk of the court

PM if you need more info. I have had a lot of experience with the court my divorce was done pro se and numerous custody problems were as well

Huggs

[Guest Arielle]

I know in California you have to have your name published in a news paper for 2 weeks. Another reason why it's easier as a minor is that you have no bills, or debt, or a dozen or more documents or places to change your name on (simply admin stuff, not that hard). SS office I was told is the hardest place to have your name changed as it depends on the person with whom you're talking. Some of them are super nice and see a legal court document and treat it as such. Others see it and still question what's really going on and will (I've been told) ask you several questions. Great thing about legal documents are they're legal, and no government agency can really question them or their validity.

The hardest thing I've been told is to convince a judge if you have to, that you're really female or your target gender. Some of them are really cool about it and will do it with just a lettre from your therapist and some are the term asses, which they believe what they see along with a lettre. So if you have an donkey for a judge, go in looking very much like a standard girl. Somewhat formal clothes are recommended.

[Guest Melanie Dawn]

Took two weeks.

TWO weeks! wow i wish it was such a shirt time here, it'll take 6 weeks for me...two week, i wish!

Melanie Dawn

[Guest symempathy]

I can understand that changing name legally must be a challenge for you guys before actual transition. I'm Vietnamese, and I don't intend to Americanize my name even though I am an American citizen. Only Vietnamese people are usually able to tell whether my name is feminine or not. I don't think I will have transition any time soon. However, like you, Cricket, I want to change it to lighten my future long steps of transition. THe only problem is that my parents may be ballistic if they find out I change my name without their consent although I'm old enough (25 years old exactly) to make my own decision. Good luck, my friend.

Minh