Have You Thought About Changing Last Name Too?

[Guest Sabine1]

I have been playing with the idea of change first and last names. Both would probably be family names, and my mother and I already have different last names (I was from an earlier marriage).

Are there reasons or considerations why I should or should not do this? I can see some professional considerations, but they may not apply in my case, or at least not in a serious way.

I should think that the steps are the same. Am I missing something?

Sabine

[Guest Aurora Christy]

Tanner did it. He changed his last name to to mine right before we got married.

[Guest Janis]

I have considered changing my last name. My reason is because my family is not supportive of my transition. I was thinking about taking my partners surname. Ultimately I decided to retain my last name.

My personal thoughts on the changing of your last name really comes down how you feel personally. I know some do to try to have that additional layer of stealth.

my .02

Janis

[Guest Donna Jean]

.

Sabine....

Honey.....one's name is a very personal thing.

It can be one that you just happene to like, one that you've had basically your life (like me) or any number of reasons.

Many people here change their names many times before finally setteling on something.

I really don't think that there are any rules on last names, though...again, a personal thing.

I can see that some people may want to split from their family, because of problems of non-acceptance...

The name change would be the same legally if you just changed the first, last or the whole thing...

Do what you need to do, Hon....

Huggs

Donna Jean

[Guest Opal]

Hi Sabine,

Yes, I am seriously considering doing that for myself. I do not know what the legal aspects are of changing both versus a first name only change. I will be anxious to see what others post to your topic.

Hugs,

Opal

[Guest OneOutOfnOne]

I've given a lot of thought to this myself, and still haven't decided if I am going to keep my birth surname or adopt my mother's.

As far as professional considerations go, you should ask if it would bother you if someone could dig up your 'past life' through your former name. I have a very, very rare last name and if I kept it, it would be very easy for someone to find former me. Beyond letting it bother you, though, keeping the name potentially leaves you open to much more discrimination.

In my case, I am worried that my father would take it as a personal insult if I changed my surname. And maybe it would be, just a little bit.

Also, there are two types of transpeople: there are those who, after transitioning, will still think of themselves as transpeople, because their past is what makes their present. And then there are those who consider their trans status a temporary disorder by which they were born the wrong sex, and afterwards will think of themselves only as their present sex. I am guessing the former group is more likely to keep their surname than the latter.

[Guest BrandonIThink]

I don't imagine changing a last name would be much different from changing a first.

I'm definately changing my last name as well. But it's mostly just a preferance thing for me-I really don't like my last name right now, and Brandon + mom's last name sound great together. It may become a non-acceptance thing though, because I'm really not expecting anything but negativity from my father when I come out.

Also, as someone said, if you're looking to go stealth, changing both names sets you further apart from who people used to know you as.

[Guest D.V. Faust]

I DID change my last name (first, middle, and last, actually).

It was something I had to do as an effort to put the past behind me and keep it there.

[Carolyn Marie]

I agree with the others, Sabine. I don't think changing your surname is any more difficult or complicated. Many women change their last names when they marry, so all the government and financial institutions make it realtively painless.

It really is a purely personal decision. I will keep mine, as it goes well with my chosen first and middle names, and I don't have any other reasons to change it.

Carolyn Marie

[Guest sarah f]

As of right now I am keeping my last name. I can see where I might change my mind if things got ugly and I didn't want someone to find me.

[Guest Elizabeth K]

Elizabeth Anne Jenkins is rather generic already. Also - my son has the surname and I would not abandon him.

BUT my t-girl friend Veronica Daniels changed the last name. She discovered she was adopted, and uses her mother's last name now.

So it happens.

Lizzy

[Guest Ree]

Hey Sabine,

I will be changing it completely as it is the name I should have had when I was born.

My name has been Rachael Elizabeth Evans, since I could remember myself, (June 12th 2010).

My fake *or* present name was one of Family History, but I have never felt a part of my family at least not that I could remember.

So for me I am R E E.

That's me

Your Sister

Ree

[Guest Lizzie McTrucker]

This has always been a touchy subject.

Do you change your last name because your family is unaccepting? What happens if you do and then they come around?

Do you not change your last name to keep with the family tree?

Do you change it your partner's last name? Do you change it something you personally like?

Do you change it to honor someone very important to you?

Do you change it to a maiden name of someone in the family?

I went back and forth about this for months. Keep the family last name..change it to something else.

Finally I decided that, you know what, family is family and they're going to be stuck with me regardless. I'm keeping it. So like it or not, they're stuck with me!

..turns out they're working towards acceptance so it all worked out in the end.

[Milly]

I'll be keeping my last name. Would be too much of an insult to the 2 people who have accepted me fully. Plus I kinda like it. I don't really care much if people wanna dig up info like that, I figure eh whatever floats their boat. Cause their are already 3 people with the name I've chosen.

[Guest Evan_J]

IF your state is like mine, the technical process is exactly the same and can be done on the same form. The only difference in examining the request for approval (I think) is that past a certain age, assuming the person to have created a credit life, a little more scrutiny may be given an adult changing a last name just to insure its not to avoid bills.

As far as professional considerations go, you should ask if it would bother you if someone could dig up your 'past life' through your former name. I have a very, very rare last name and if I kept it, it would be very easy for someone to find former me. Beyond letting it bother you, though, keeping the name potentially leaves you open to much more discrimination.

In my case, I am worried that my father would take it as a personal insult if I changed my surname. And maybe it would be, just a little bit.

Also, there are two types of transpeople: there are those who, after transitioning, will still think of themselves as transpeople, because their past is what makes their present. And then there are those who consider their trans status a temporary disorder by which they were born the wrong sex, and afterwards will think of themselves only as their present sex. I am guessing the former group is more likely to keep their surname than the latter.

Your past life may not be so easily linked to the name just because you could have family members. Even "rare" names are held by more than just one individual in the world. There (arguably) would be a mother, father , cousin...... You may be attaching more tracing power to the name than it justifies

Would your father be insulted? Very likely. Men (from what I've seen ) take the possession of their last name very seriously . At least with children from marriage.

I could be an oddity, but I'm not one on the "my past creates my future " bus. For me , the past dies 9 minutes after it gets shipped to the "the past" void. But I think I would keep my last name. Just because its the hypest last name in the world in my opinion

[Guest OneOutOfnOne]

Would your father be insulted? Very likely. Men (from what I've seen ) take the possession of their last name very seriously . At least with children from marriage.

It's worse than that... my father gave me his first name, too. What was he thinking?

[Guest Sabine1]

Hi -- thanks!

I have been thinking about who the last name change would affect. I think my father would be upset, but the last name change would be within his side anyway, meaning another family last name in his line. He will be upset enough with the change, especially as I am his only son, though I am not worried about rejection.

As I am thinking about making the choice of the first name with my mother (though I have a name in mind now and a middle one), I may talk with my father about the last name.

I'm not worried about being googled. My existing name is common and I get mixed up will all sorts of others already. Ironically, I'll probably be the only one with the new name. I will probably have to transition quite openly anyway, and the ones I worry about are not friends and neighbors but family. Professionally, I'm going switch careers now as well, which makes it much harder anyway.

Sabine

[Guest vertigo]

Well, the thing is that my last name represents my gender [and even my maritial status], so I'll pretty much have to. It would be great if I could change them at the same time. However, I don't know if this is very... possible here.

Sometimes I just can't stand my country. It just encourages you to emigrate.

[Sakura]

i changed my last name from my dads to my grand fathers ( my mothers dad ) personal reasons. i would have done it even if i had planned to keep my first name

Sakura

[Guest harvester52]

I changed my last name to my mom's maiden name. The Fords, the ENTIRE family... and I'm talking a huge family... all accepted me 100% from the get-go, and we have a really unique bond in the Ford family that I haven't really seen anywhere else. The Halls did not accept me one bit, have not come around (it's been three years since I came out) and are extremely conservative, anti-gay-marriage people that I just can't relate to. It wasn't hard to make the choice to change my last name, and it was easy enough. In Oregon, you can do your entire name all in the same paper/filing.

-BC

[Guest JeanVier]

I'm changing my first, middle, and last name-- I hope to file within the week! I thought for a long time about my last name, I think I even have a post on the board somewhere about it, and I eventually decided to change my birth last name to my great-grandmother's maiden name. She's an important figure for me, as a full Cherokee woman, and I wanted to stress throughout the process that I am -NOT- changing my name to sever any connection with my family but rather just to fashion a name I am happy and comfortable with. So, my last name will be my great-grandmother's, my middle name will be one my partner spontaneously created for me (because I need to keep him feeling good and important about our relationship and it is a great name he came up with, combination of Japanese "young man" and Hebrew "pearl," oddly enough), and my first name I chose with my partner's blessing for its meaning and sound/look.

Take care!

-JV

[Guest Felicia Anne]

i plan on changing my name completely, if i wind up becoming a full time woman. my full name i'd like to be known as?

felicia - inspired by both the character on general hospital in the 80's and the character black cat in the spider man comics, both of them were early icons of femininity for me. also, i think it is the most feminine and romantic name i could ever hope for!

anne - for both my friend anne in high school and anne hathaway, two women that have inspired me with their grace, beauty, kindness and poise

james - for my father, who has passed, and who i want to honor

[Guest Haidos]

i plan to change my surname to that of my grandfather on my mothers side purely out of respect for him as a person and because i dislike my current name.

[Guest angie]

My bff changed both her first and last and it alienated

her family.They cannot accept that she changed her family

name,like she was embarrassed of her family.I Know Sue read

the Transexxual Roadmap that strongly suggests you change

both.That way it is harder to leave a trail.Well,to me that

is only if you have something to hide,or are considering full

stealth.She is regreting her decision,neither her bother,nor

sister,or her father,ex or child,will have any thing to do

with her,and she is feeling lonely and hurt.

I was considering taking my Mom's maiden name,because of my heritage

I look Latina.But it was my family that made me see the negatives.

They asked was I ashamed of them?Did I not lead an honorable life?

Was I not proud of my last name? And after hearing their arguments,

I decided to keep my last name the same,and like who I am now,proud

of being a woman while keeping my family heritage alive.

Just food for thought,

Angelique

[Guest Melissa 67]

I wanted to change my last name as well as my first from the start. Not only because I want to get away from my old self or so no one can tye me to him. I also have no personal connection to it because of the ways my parents think of me.

Melissa 67