Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Slipped Up On My Diet Again


Guest Opal

Recommended Posts

Well, I thought if anything, I would have an even greater incentive to stay on my diet now. However, I just slipped up and feeling overstuffed and a bit nauseous.

Do I beat myself up mentally and emotionally over this, or just accept that it happened and move forward? :(

Well, at least I am out of the specific junk food item I binged on, so will just have to refrain from purchasing any more from the store.

Huggs,

Opal

Link to comment
Guest Elizabeth K

Opal - only you can enforce eating habits.

I use a maintenance diet - and if I binge I can have a bad sugar reaction (diabetis II) so that is incentive for me. I work with Sally - she needs to lose one pound a week for almost two years to be eligible for SRS - which is a real incentive, oh my yes.

I suppose you have to think incentive. I am trying to get into a size 12. I am just between 16 and 14 now - wow - my choices of women's clothing available as a 16 is so much better than when I was a size 18.

More incentive!

If I lose the 15 pounds I am trying to lose by Christams - I will have a really fine waist - SEXY! Size 34" I think - and when I was starting transitioning 20 months ago I was a 42" inch waist. I have lost 24 pounds since then. YEAAAA

On HRT - the male belly disappears when we MTF diet. BUT losing weight is harder to do when on estrogen...

So take a deep breath - resolve to eat to live, not to live to eat. Become a woman and just watch your figure! Actually - forever, from now... NO empty calories like chips, no snack foods, no soft drinks, no candy bars EVER! Think of that stuff as RAT POISON!

Lizzy

Link to comment
Guest therisa

Except, when we are battling depression, these types of foods, become comfort foods for us. And yes, I know the struggle, which a Type II diabetic faces, in regards, to these type of foods, being one, myself. Opal, slip ups happen, don't beat yourself up. Just have to start over again. That's all.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Opal,

Many of us have emotional relationships with food. And feeling guilty only brings on more eating. Or wanting to eat.

Slipping once in awhile isn't bad-it can actually kick your metabolism up a little and make you lose faster.

In fact that's often what the binges are about-if you don't up your intake once in awhile your body believes it is starving-regardless of actual nutrition level and shuts your metabolism down further.

But dieting and losing weight is a complex issue-almost as complex as trans and the source of immeasurable suffering and loss of self esteem. for some people Lizzy's way works. For others it doesn't.

Some of us are addicted to food, some of us use food as a coping mechanism and some of us have medical conditions that cause weight gain or eating issues.

If losing and controlling weight was a matter of willpower and determination there wouldn't be a fat person in the country. Not a fat woman anyway. Society enforces enormous sanctions against being overweight-fat people are openly humiliated and descriminated against. They can't go out of their homes without some humiliation. Yet these are often people who show enormous determination and willpower in everything else. Organized disciplined people also get fat and have eating issues. It isn't the stereotypical lazy overindulgent person. Scientific research has indicated that some people have blood chemistry issues that make eating as imperative as breathing. Each one of those people has to find a weight loss system that works for them. And it can vary enormously. Sometimes the only solution is exercise-lots of exercise

For some weight loss is possible with a regime and close supervision of their activities. But that has been shown to be effective only as long as the supervision remains. UNLESS physical activity is dramaticlly increased as weight decreases because the eating will eventually revert some.

What I'm really saying is find what works for you -if something fails try something else. if you binge once in awhile-ignore it and go on. A lot of really fit and thin people have 1 day a week that they eat anything and everything they want. Keeps your metabolism up and keeps you from cravings or giving in to them. And in truth your body eliminates calories above a certain amount when it is an infrequent indulgence.

But if you find you just CAN'T do it then talk to your Dr. and keep trying other approaches. But don't beat yourself up. Don't blame yourself-and seek help. Controlling weight isn't always a matter of logic or willpower. Sometimes like being trans it's not your fault.

Love

JJ

Link to comment

Sorry to hear you are having a problem with your diet Opal. All you can do is to learn where you slipped up so you won't do it again. My weakness is salt water taffy and one of my favorite places to shop, Sunflower Market has over 30 flavors. So I think we all struggle with this to some degree.

Love Jenny

Link to comment
Guest NadineB

Don't worry about binge eating occasionally. I have been trying to loose weight since February and believe I am doing pretty good. Lost 28lbs so far. The reason I say don't worry is cause firstly you now feel yucky and will think twice about it next time. Secondly you can't quit food so if you are constantly craving something you are going to be miserable and hate your diet, so have it, just portion your self and have just enough to satisfy yourself. One of the tricks I use is too vacumm seal small portions of danger foods so it makes it a little more difficult to get to it or you end up thinking twice before opening it. Get a small bowl to use for snacks, that way you don't eat huge amounts. Try eating smaller portions with your meals too, increase veggies and decrease meats. Try avoid white breads and white pasta, try whole grains. Substitue one meal a day with a salad but avoid creamy dressings.

My wife and I joined weight watchers back in feb and it works. We learnt which are bad food and which are filling yet good foods.

Just keep in mind that if you only loose 1 pound a week for a year it totals 52 lbs. So do it slow and sure, and if you slip up don't worry just don't give up.

From the future skinny Nadine

Link to comment
Guest Donna Jean

.

Opal....sweetheart....

Just one thing from me....ok?

If you slip up on a diet...do NOT look at it as starting all over again...

Look at it as picking up where you left off!

G'luck, Hon...

BIGG HUGGS!

Donna Jean

Link to comment
Guest NatashaJade

I've been pretty bad on my diet recently and have finally resolved to rejoin the battle and get to it (rebooting P90X next week!). We make mistakes. We're human. Don't try to be perfect. Just be really really good and don't punish yourself for overeating by eating more.

luv

Gin

Link to comment
Guest KimberlyF

Do I beat myself up mentally and emotionally over this, or just accept that it happened and move forward? :(

This board is all about moving forward. You can't undo the past but you can work on the future. Full speed ahead.

Kim

Link to comment

Dear Opal,

Over eating for many of us is not a need or even desire for food it is an emotional response to things around us that effect our lives.

I realized that the reason that i ate so much for so long was due to being depressed and lonely - in effect food and Huggy were my only true companions who always were there for me.

I should have depended more on Huggy and less on pizza, hamburgers, fried chicken and chicken fried steaks - any comfort food at all and when that didn't work it was desserts!

The truth is you do not need the food you are trying to fill an emotional void and it will never work - find a friend to help you when you feel the need to binge call them and talk instead of munching.

You may PM me if you would like.

Love ya,

Sally

Link to comment

Thank you all so much for your kind and thoughtful replies. It was just while I was doing it, I seemed to push the rational for not doing it completely aside.

I guess I at least resisted the urge to try to purge. Was not as strong as the last time I did this, but resisted purging last time, but I really have better sympathy for those that do purge and become bulimic.

Yes, this is related to SRS for me as well. Right now I am ten lbs over, would like to be ten pounds under while on HRT. Guess SRS was only a pipe dream until this week.... wait, that does not sound quite right.... SRS was more or less an abstract notion for me, figuring I had better not get my hopes up too high in case HRT was out of the question.

Anyway, it is so touching how you all responded. Wish I could give you physical hugs, but feel fortunate that we have the virtual kind.

Big Huggs,

Opal

Link to comment
Guest ~Brenda~

Opal hon :)

Dieting is actually a way of life. Falling out of your diet now and then is not a problem. When your lifestyle changes so that you are not ever on your diet is a problem. I usually wath what I eat and stick to my diet (my way of life). However, if I am out at a dinner with friends or at a prty where food is served, I don't worry about my diet. These ae rare occasions and not a consistent part of my life style. Therefore, I know I have nothing to worry about.

Don't worry honey :)

Love

Brenda

Link to comment
Guest JustShelly

[

So take a deep breath - resolve to eat to live, not to live to eat. Become a woman and just watch your figure! Actually - forever, from now... NO empty calories like chips, no snack foods, no soft drinks, no candy bars EVER! Think of that stuff as RAT POISON!

Lizzy

Lizzy is right on this!

Don't cut yourself down. We all have enough on are plate to get us down. Try to take a walk or walk in place if you can't. It may not burn off all the calories you consumed, but its a start. :)

I fortunately am trying to add a few pounds (not many though).

My fist weight loss regiment was about 7 years ago. I wasn't too much overweight the heaviest I got was 165 I'm 5'7"-8". I just didn't like myself and I didn't want to get bigger.

I never went on a diet, I just made better choices and eliminated things. I did start to exercise more, mostly push ups but nothing too serious. I managed to get down to 145 in 6-8 months.

The main reason for my wight loss I believe was eliminating soda and cutting back on cheese, (I'm from Wisconsin) :P I also switched to skim milk as I drink alot. I also snacked on dry fruit and nuts. I wish I could eat fresh fruit, but allergic to most fruit unless dehydrated.

I still eat this way to this day. That is probably one reason I don't gain any weight. I do indulge in treats quite a bit. I just don't over do it. When I do I try to exercise a little more.

I did manage to lose an additional 20 pounds. I went through (and still do) major depression due to my divorce and other things (gid). I was the opposite of alot of other people, instead of going to food for comfort I just couldn't eat at times. I definitely don't recommend this diet. :unsure:

Hang in there. Maybe you can just give up or cut back on one certain food. After awhile its like quiting smoking you don't even miss it much, difference is you can at least try it again once and awhile with out getting hooked.

Best wishes

Shelly

Link to comment
Guest sarah f

Opal it is ok to slip up every once in a while. What is important is that you recognize that and you will do whatever it takes to lose the weight you want to.

What you need is to just go walk it off and you will feel better about yourself. Anytime I eat too much food, I just really commit myself the next week or two to make up the difference.

Link to comment

Thank you, everyone for your kind and thoughtful replies! The extra salt did probably help me yesterday out in the sun.

I did take up Sally's kind offer and we discussed some possible underlying causes on PM. Sally, thank you so much!!

The urge is still there, but no further binges.

Huggs all!

Opal

Link to comment
  • 3 weeks later...
Guest Miss_Construe

sweetie,

I would also encourage you to reflect and honor the effort and progress you have made in all of your work. When I slip up in anything I just remember that 90% is still an 'A'. When exercising I know that I can go until I can't go anymore, then I must stop and rest. I remind myself that if I choose to not get into my head about having to take breaks and focus on forward movement I can succeed. I let myself work up to my goals, even if that means starting from an embarrassingly neophytic stance.

Every day you get out of bed is a victory. Every time you stick to your diet, it is a victory. Every time you slip off your diet, but allow yourself to have that moment of rest (even enjoy your moment of rebellion), is a victory.

What you are doing is very difficult, please don't loose site of how great your effort, strength and will are.

I hope for the best for you,

Amy

Link to comment

sweetie,

I would also encourage you to reflect and honor the effort and progress you have made in all of your work. When I slip up in anything I just remember that 90% is still an 'A'. When exercising I know that I can go until I can't go anymore, then I must stop and rest. I remind myself that if I choose to not get into my head about having to take breaks and focus on forward movement I can succeed. I let myself work up to my goals, even if that means starting from an embarrassingly neophytic stance.

Every day you get out of bed is a victory. Every time you stick to your diet, it is a victory. Every time you slip off your diet, but allow yourself to have that moment of rest (even enjoy your moment of rebellion), is a victory.

What you are doing is very difficult, please don't loose site of how great your effort, strength and will are.

I hope for the best for you,

Amy

Thank you so much, Amy! Your words of encouragement apply in so many ways!

Huggs,

Opal

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   1 Member, 0 Anonymous, 198 Guests (See full list)

    • MaryEllen
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.8k
    • Total Posts
      769.9k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,085
    • Most Online
      8,356

    blakethetiredracc00n
    Newest Member
    blakethetiredracc00n
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. FullyHart
      FullyHart
    2. MariPosa
      MariPosa
      (65 years old)
    3. pechenezhka
      pechenezhka
      (17 years old)
    4. Rubycd
      Rubycd
      (59 years old)
    5. Yana
      Yana
      (31 years old)
  • Posts

    • VickySGV
      He has also vowed to NOT ACCEPT the election results even if they  clearly show he lost.
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://watermarkonline.com/2024/05/13/trump-vows-to-reverse-transgender-student-protections-on-day-one/     Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://www.nbcnews.com/nbc-out/out-politics-and-policy/mississippi-reeves-transgender-bathroom-ban-public-schools-rcna152036     As in every such case, who will check birth certificates at the restroom doors?  This law will not, and can not, stand.  We'll see you in court, governor.   Carolyn Marie
    • Carolyn Marie
      I've been looking forward to the legitimate medical groups coming out strongly against Cass' biased and one sided report, so I'm really glad to see the article you posted, @Davie.  Unfortunately, it won't get nearly the coverage that Cass has gotten.  She has done her dirty work.  Hopefully the pushback and investigative reports on her and her support network will result in her work being shown for what it is.  She is a fraud, and sooner or later all frauds are found out.   Carolyn Marie
    • KayC
      CONGRATULATIONS, Jessica!!  That's really BIG! I myself did not experience a huge emotional roller coaster.  It was more like a smooth slide into emotional comfort.  The biggest effect I felt is when my Dr put me on T-blockers first.  I felt a bit 'empty' for a couple of months, but then realized it was just because the 'T-monster' was no longer running around inside of me.  Then I felt it was my new 'normal'. I feel like the estradiol was the 'frosting' on my transition affirmation.  It's been only positives.  I do cry a lot more, but it's only because I finally feel free to allow my emotions to come out.  To me it's not 'hormonal' ... it's FREEDOM!   Everybody is different but it sounds like you are under great care.  I hope you have a beautiful first year in transition on HRT (keep us updated if you can).
    • Desert Fox
      Yeah, whatever happened to “good morning”?  I think “hey you” can also work to address people without offense…”you” can be single or plural so that works for any gender, non binary, or any group of people, and can be pleasantly offensive or neutral.   And I am very familiar with the experience of being “ma’amed” while in boy mode, particularly on the phone by customer support people located outside north America for some reason. 
    • KayC
      I'm hoping this election cycle might finally cause 'that' party to pay a price for such nonsense.
    • Desert Fox
      So nice to hear things are going well for you. Support is huge and that is especially great when it comes from your SO as well as your family and son. I think being happy with one’s own life’s direction can set the stage for not only other successes but attract others who are in alignment with one’s own ideals. it sounds like you are definitely on a positive trajectory!
    • Desert Fox
      There is some progress being made, some positive awakening from those who understand the difference between biology and the societal roles and rules that have been created by humans to separate, restrict and control other humans. Unfortunately so many people are still set in one way of thinking about gender, whether it benefits them directly to do so or they just fail to think about things for themselves for whatever reason, and they often cite religious or other historical sources to try to back up their argument, sources which typically could be open to various interpretations.   Pushing boundaries is what makes progress and it’s what we are meant to do…but most everyone that has pushed a boundary also gets pushback. Most everyone who has disagreed with conventional thought is called a fool or worse; those who invent something get ridiculed and laughed out, then their ideas are stolen for someone else’s profit. We suffer tremendously to push boundaries but ultimately it’s what society needs to evolve.
    • Ashley0616
      Goodness! You sure have been busy! That's really crappy of what your oldest pulled. That part about the talking about getting asked if it's an enhancement was funny. I guess your boss is going to miss you and just has a funny way of showing it? 
    • Desert Fox
      I read this thread with great interest…thank you, Sally for sharing your life in this detail. As I too identify as bigender, I suppose I am also looking for validation of my experience because I don’t know many transgender individuals that stay in a long-term part-time situation. For most, bigender seems to be a temporary step to fill-time transition or it is more of something someone puts on, as in cross dressing or drag. I have always struggled to explain how someone could legitimately have two identities sharing one body, yet that’s basically how it has been for me for my whole life, all the way back to early childhood.    You and I are roughly in the same era, and growing up with gender variance was different than it is nowadays. Some of our experiences were similar, but generally your life went quite differently than mine.   Back in the day, a part-time person was called a transvestite and a full-timer was called a transsexual (often committing to bottom surgery as well), but I’ve really come to dislike the cross dresser/transvestite label because it tends to be associated with those who are fine with being cis, but like to dress in drag for fun or fetish. And that doesn’t describe all part-timers. I would say that I’m actually a transsexual who chose never to transition, and presenting female part-time is how I have coped with lifelong gender dysphoria. I don’t like myself being male, and never did, I simply accept that I am and have lived most of my life that way and just don’t care to put in the effort and money to transition.  I’m naturally a pretty girly male but I have to add hair, makeup and clothing to present female and I also try to “tone down” my girliness in male form. True androgyny never worked for me; I always switched between male and female looks, but at least that allowed me to use public bathrooms without issue.     I’m very curious - did you have a set of people, ie friends, family, coworkers, who only knew you as “male” and another set who knew you as Sally, with only a few (like your wife) knowing both sides? Such was more or less the case with me. 
    • mattie22
      I feel like a fake sometimes I am not really transfeminine WELL UNDER THEAT UMBRALA but whatever i call it. Like i do not deserve it others know ealer than me and did not identify as their gender at birth well It is more like just enough of me did to get by growing up and there were not many other options on what else i could be and when i got older i just found out about the standard trans people feel like they're born in the wrong body and i saw my self as a male so this could not be me even though it did not comply fit me. even though there is a part of me that likes to be seen and treated like a woman and ideally would probably like to live at least 70 percent of my time as one and perhaps the rest as male but what does this make a freak. also, I am around people who do not like people like me and they are family and do not know. this makes me feel even worse. Sometimes I wonder if I m just some gnc male, who is just using this as an escape if I become a woman for real I do not have to deal with all the crap that comes with being a feminine bisexual male. There are so many layers.
    • MaeBe
      I bet you looked every pennies worth of that million! I'm sure, even beyond the courtier's interactions it was a very fun evening.
    • MaeBe
      I haven't been posting much, it's been a bit of a whirlwind: My wife took a job in WA State, meaning we're moving halfway across the country by the end of the Summer. I was told "it would be good if you had a new job by the end of the month", meaning I'm getting laid off at the same time. My eldest snuck booze while we were at our friends' house, had a bad interaction with his anti-depressants, and then had the huevos to lie that he wasn't drunk while accusing us of not trusting him. There's been a lot to process lately.   That said, I got called ma'am for the first time today while out. Twice! I can't stop thinking about it. Later, my dad showed up without plan to watch the Liverpool match and I was way more girled up (see ma'am) than he's ever seen me; hair, makeup, tight top, skinny jeans, and brand new sandals. At one point he pointed at my boob and asked, "is that 'enhancement'?". If you call a t-shirt bra enhancement, I guess? "Nope, that's just me!". Later, my boss came at me all passive-aggressive via chat after hours, too. I'm kind of tired with his -crap-. I won't have a job in two weeks, so it's cool to just assume I'm sabotaging things? K. /eyeroll   It's been an interesting day.
    • Sally Stone
      Post 12   “First Kiss”   It was October 29th, 2003.  My dear friend Willa had purchased tickets for the two of us to attend “Red Hot Halloween,” a public Halloween party held at the Sanctuary in downtown Pittsburgh.  The event was a fund raiser benefitting the Pittsburgh AIDS Task Force.  It was a great cause but it was also the perfect opportunity to let the adventurous side of my feminine persona have a little fun.    My first question to Willa was: “What should I wear?”    “Are you kidding?” She responded.  “This is your opportunity to be the Sally of your dreams.  I suggest you dress to impress.”   My first thought was to dress naughty.  It was Halloween, so it could be the perfect venue for something with an erotic edge to it.  I thought about going as a dominatrix or a naughty French maid.  After we talked about it, and weighed the pros and cons, Willa and I decided against naughty, and instead, chose to wear the fanciest evening gowns we could find.  Willa bought an expensive, silver sequined gown, and matching high-heels just for the event.  Me, on the other hand, I couldn’t justify spending big bucks on an evening gown for a single event, so I took a less expensive route.  It is amazing what you can find on the sale racks at big department stores when you look hard enough.  For a mere 30-dollars, I found a black, sleeveless column gown with matching bolero jacket.  The dress had a slit up the right leg, and it went all the way to my upper thigh, very sexy.  Being a column dress, it was form-fitting, and hugged my curves like a glove.  To complement my dress, I wore black patent high-heel pumps, a long blonde wig, and a set of long red fingernails.  As I recall, it took me three-hours just to do my makeup.  The end result, though, was worth the effort, because I felt like a million bucks.  It’s so obvious, why girls love dressing up – it’s an unbelievable high!   Inside the club it was a sea of bodies and the costumes were amazing.  At one point, I was standing on a balcony that overlooked the dance floor.  I was nursing a cocktail and watching the crowd.  Suddenly, there was a gentleman standing next to me; I didn’t notice his approach.  He told me I looked fabulous and he offered to buy me another drink.  I declined his drink offer, but we struck up a conversation.  Being a little slow, it took me a while to realize he was hitting on me. I never imagined anyone would ever actually be attracted to Sally, which I think contributed to my cluelessness.  So, I was shocked, and initially, a little creeped out as well.  After all, I wasn't into guys, and this was new to me.  As we continued talking, and he kept throwing accolades my way, I went from being uncomfortable to actually being flattered.    The event, being an AIDS fund raiser, had me assuming this guy was hitting on me because he was gay, and he thought I was, as well.  I wanted to set the record straight, so I casually mentioned that I wasn’t gay.  To my amazement, he responded by saying: “neither am I.”  Okay, now what was I supposed to do?  I didn’t want to be rude, but I didn’t want to send the wrong message either.  While I was trying to decide how to tell him I wasn’t interested, he asked if he could kiss me.  Not sure what I was thinking at that moment, I said “okay.”  He kissed me, and as strange as it was, I gave into it, not pulling away or disengaging.  It wasn’t a super passionate kiss, but it was more than a friendly peck on the lips, and I actually enjoyed it.  When we separated; however, I got the sense his passion had cooled.  I could only assume that my response to his kiss sent some kind of message that I wasn’t interested.    Whatever it was he picked up on, it let me off the hook, and I didn’t have to rebuff any further advances.  For this I was grateful, but at the same time, I was actually a little disappointed.  Clearly, I wasn’t going to lead him on, but it was so gratifying to know I had sparked his interest.  Despite his diminished passion, and his obvious realization I wasn’t going to be his girl, he remained the perfect gentleman.  We chatted for a few minutes more, then he gave me the nicest smile.  Again, he commented on how terrific I looked.  Then he added, “maybe I’ll see you later.”    It was hard for me to reconcile how I could have garnered the attention of a man.  In my mind’s eye, I knew my feminine presentation didn’t completely mask my birth sex, so why would a self-proclaimed straight guy actually be interested in me?  Had it been the only time something like this would happen, I would have chalked it up to random chance.  But it wouldn’t be the last time a man would hit on me.  It doesn’t happen often, but it still occurs more than I would have guessed, and I'm always surprised.    I have never asked, but I have always been curious to know my would-be suitor’s motivations.  Were they hitting on me simply because they happened to be fond of trans women, or was their attraction triggered by connecting with my inner woman?  And, however unlikely, did they mistake me for a cis woman?  I guess it really doesn’t matter much one way or the other, because ultimately, I’m not looking for any kind of a relationship.  However, I’d be fibbing if I said I wasn’t at least a little interested in another opportunity to get kissed.   Hugs,   Sally
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...