6 Weeks After Starting Rle

[Guest jamiejcmo]

Hello all, sorry it's been a while. Things have been crazy last few months but worth it. As most have read I did my name change in July and had everything changed over by end of August. End of July was my 9 months on HRT and the Dr. started me on a small dose of Provera. I was an A at this point and then things started happening fast and furious. By end of Sept I was a small B and fat distribution started happening(I'm 46 years old), by my Oct. Dr. appt. (12 month) I was a B and couldn't hide them any longer. People had started calling me ma'am in boy mode so I asked the Dr. about going full-time and she said "go for it".At this point my Dr. increased Provera to max dose. I gave my employer 2 weeks written notice(I have been out since January so they were expecting it. Nov.8th I went full-time and it took a couple of weeks for coworkers to adjust but everything is cool now. The last couple of weeks have been great. I just get up and go about everyday as female (work, shopping, grocery store, and even auto parts store(story behind that). The whole thing just snowballed and I was trying to keep up. It has not been easy and there were some situations that had to be dealt with but you just deal with them and roll on. Now I understand why they tell you to be sure of your decision before comitting to go full-time. Once you make that decision your life will change drastically and quickly. If you asked me 15 months ago if this could happen I would have said you are crazy, but if you want it bad enough you can do it. I was 45 years old 250 pounds(mostly muscle) 5ft 10in, huge shoulders. Now 5ft 8in down to 200lbs, 38 full B, still huge shoulders but less muscular,and size 18 on top and 14 on pants.I still make an ugly woman but at least I pass as an ugly woman. LOL I wish eveyone the best and have a wonderful Christmas, Jamie

[JenniferB]

Jamie, Isn't that a lesson for everyone. Do what you have to do and prepare for the consequences. That is what I am going through and am a few steps behind you. You are an inspiration and I admire you for your courage.

Jenny

[Guest jamiejcmo]

Wow, that is great Jenny. I wish you the best,it's not easy but it is so worth it. Poeple ask me now if it I regret it (losing family and friends, all the funny looks and remarks) and I tell them "HELL NO" it was all worth it. I have never felt better about myself. I do not know if I would call it courage, I look at it as determination. Congrat's on getting to where you are and take care, Jamie

[Guest BeckyTG]

Hi Jamie,

I love to hear you tell your stories. I remember your name change story well and am happy that you're now full time. I know what you mean about being sure. You have to get up at least 45 minutes earlier to moisturize body, do hair and makeup. I love how it makes me look and feel. Yes, there are mornings when you don't want to, but you can't get the paper off the porch without fixing your face. Once you're in this territory, there is truly no going back.

I don't know if the change in your medication has as much to do with your physical development as time does. I felt like I was developing at at a nice pace up to about 9 months. I was a 36A and felt good about it. At 10 months, I tried on a pair of jeans in a store and looked at my backside in a mirror...OMG! That was no "boy bottom" that I saw. I am woman from that angle now. Now, I began to notice I'm getting a figure. A month later, I tried a B bra and it fit, so I bought 4. A month and a half later, those are getting tight, so I tried a C bra and it fit. This is, just like you, in the space of about 3 months. I put on clothes and they fit. Dang.

I no longer think of discovery or passing. I am woman and I'm just out and about, doing what women do, just like all the others out there. I am truly comfortable as myself and living my life.

I am so happy to hear that you are at this stage. It *IS* all worth it, isn't it?

Keep us posted and forge ahead.

Hugs,

Becky

[Guest jamiejcmo]

Hello Becky, It seems as though I have been following one step behind you. All I have to do is wait and see what you do next. LOL! Yes it is the most wonderful thing to just be yourself and not worry all the time. Life is beautiful every day now. I just got back from buying some more sweaters for work. I cant wait til spring gets here and I can buy some really cute outfits. Big girls have to look good also.LOL. Well, what do we do next? Talk to you later, Jamie

[Drea]

When you said you gave your employer two weeks noticed I was confused. Sounded to me that you had gone full time by quitting your job. Then I read on and realized that you gave emoployer notice of changing gender roles which they were expecting at some point. Ah that is very different and sounds like you planned well.

Unfortunatly the moment of confusion was based on way to many past examples were the trans person either quits their job without first finding a way to support themselves or "retire" even though they don't have the money to retire. All in order to achieve that arbitrary point of becomming full time.

[Guest jamiejcmo]

Hello Drea. Sorry for the confusion, yes I gave them a written memo explaining what date I was going full time and that it would not interfear with my job performance. I also asked that they try to use the proper pronouns. As far as planning ahead.. yes and no. I planned to do this stuff in a certain order but the time frame was not even close. I started hormones last Oct and told my boss about what I was doing last Dec. and told him that I was planning on being on hormones a year and then would come out to coworkers. That would have been this coming Jan. Well last Jan. word got out and went thru the shop like wildfire. So I was "out" a year early and it worked out great giving everyone time to adjust. Then the name change in July and the effects became obvious by Sept. so I gradually started changing my appearance. Then contacted HR in Oct after 12 month Dr. visit and told them of my plans. They thanked me for doing this slowly and giving everyone time to adjust to it. On Nov. 8th I went ful-time and never looked back. I had heard of horror stories and I was prepared to lose my job but I have been there 23 years and only have 6 more til retirement. The employers only concern was if I could still do my job. I work in a factory type enviorment running big equipment. Other than being a little weaker I have had no problems. My coworkers treat me like any other female...I get the usual girl remarks and the blue collar male comments. Hey I'm a girl now I can take it! LOL

[Guest Lacey Lynne]

Jamie & BeckyTG:

You two amaze me, and I really admire both of you.

Consider yourselves fortunate, ladies. Truly, I marvel at your development. It's great that you two are transitioning at relatively younger ages. Time can be a "killer" for those starting really late.

Heck, this very day, I saw the doctor who oversees my HRT for hormone levels, blood chemistry tests, an examination and a possible HRT titration. Mind you, my doctor is herself a fully-transitioned MTF. Far out!

Anyway, she's doing my breast examination and says I'm a small A cup but told me I'm doing great for my age and that us later transitioners are only going to get A or B cups at best ... unless we're really lucky. Check out my profile pic and that's me without a bra. Yeah, it's sad, and I know it. Mind you, I'm A YEAR and two weeks on HRT. Oh, well ... sigh.

I meant to go fulltime on 31 October 2010; however, had a job loss and had to stay in guy mode to get another one. Also, I'm scared to go fulltime. Why? Because, I KNOW that I DON'T pass.

I'm happy for you Becky and Jamie. Way to go.

[Carolyn Marie]

Thank you so much for the update, Jamie. You are truly an inspiration, and a timely one too, as I plan my own workplace transition for

just 3-4 months from now (if I don't lose my nerve first ). I hope things turn out as well for me as they have for you.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Guest BeckyTG]

Jamie & BeckyTG:

You two amaze me, and I really admire both of you.

Consider yourselves fortunate, ladies. Truly, I marvel at your development. It's great that you two are transitioning at relatively younger ages. Time can be a "killer" for those starting really late.

I don't know about Jamie, but you're right about me starting young. I was only 62 when I started and I'm so glad I didn't wait until I was older.... I'm getting great results.

Heck, this very day, I saw the doctor who oversees my HRT for hormone levels, blood chemistry tests, an examination and a possible HRT titration. Mind you, my doctor is herself a fully-transitioned MTF. Far out!

Having one experienced to guide you and care for you is very valuable.

Anyway, she's doing my breast examination and says I'm a small A cup but told me I'm doing great for my age and that us later transitioners are only going to get A or B cups at best ... unless we're really lucky. Check out my profile pic and that's me without a bra. Yeah, it's sad, and I know it. Mind you, I'm A YEAR and two weeks on HRT. Oh, well ... sigh.

A small A can become a decent A with a pushup bra from Victoria's Secret. I had one and it really helped me out at the time. Many natal women have small breasts, don't obsess over it. One woman whom I consider to be a good friend and very much a woman is flat as a board. After I came out to her, she told me that she'd had a double radical mastectomy and being flat never bothered her.

Just look at other women. Some are really flat. Your photo looks very girly to me. Suck up some confidence. Walk tall and be proud of who you are. You can't help how you were born. Just work to make the best of it. Besides, just because you're small now doesn't mean you won't develop some later. Naturally born girls take 5 years or more to develop, others take up to 7 years. Don't be so impatient.

I meant to go fulltime on 31 October 2010; however, had a job loss and had to stay in guy mode to get another one. Also, I'm scared to go fulltime. Why? Because, I KNOW that I DON'T pass.

I'm happy for you Becky and Jamie. Way to go.

Thank you for the compliments. I'm working on this like everyone else and doing what I can each day.

Remember, this is a marathon, not a sprint. Each day, do what you can, with what you have, where you're at. Do it with every fiber of your being. Do it as if the house were on fire.

Imagine how productive our lives could be if we each got as much done each day as we did on the day before we went on vacation....

Hugs,

Becky

[Guest jamiejcmo]

First off, Carolyn you will be fine. After the first couple of weeks the shock is over and it becomes routine. Next, I wish I looked as good as Becky does. I started out at 5-10 250lbs of upper body muscle and 15 months later I'm 5-8 203 lbs still have another 50lbs of muscle to lose. On Thurday the Dr. said she would approve me for SRS as soon as my year of RLT is over. That gives me about 9 months to lose that 50 lbs and get the money for SRS. As for Lacey you have been on hormones almost as long as me and you look great. I don't see how you can go back to boy mode. You definitley look female. Thanks for teliing me that 46 is starting young. When I look at my 26 year old son I feel pretty Gosh darned old. I remember my first psyc. telling me I shouldn't do this because I will make a very ugly woman and I remember telling her "I would rather be an ugly woman than a boy any day"

[Guest Emily Ray]

I have 6 months full-time and for the first three I felt like I was trapped to an office chair with a rocket atached. Things are settled now thank goodness. As far as my chest development goes I am on a slow train. They are a small B. I have been wearing an A cup pushup bra from victorias for three months and I am starting to not fit so well. I really want to be on injections because the pills are a pain.

You look great and I am so happy things are working out for you!

Huggs

Emily

[guest]

I was 45 years old 250 pounds(mostly muscle) 5ft 10in, huge shoulders. Now 5ft 8in down to 200lbs, 38 full B, still huge shoulders but less muscular,and size 18 on top and 14 on pants

Wait wait wait...you shrunk?! I thought the height thing wasn't affected by HRT?

[Guest jamiejcmo]

Yes, I was surprised also. The Dr. measured twice. She said bone structure doesn't change and it is not unusual to lose 1 inch due to muscle loss. I also went from a woman's size 11 shoe to a 10.