Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

A delicate situation


Guest Amberley_Vail

Recommended Posts

Guest Amberley_Vail

Since moving out from my parents place, my transition has gone pretty well. I can wear what I like, dont have to do washings in secret and generally be me.

I went back home for a visit today, and arrived when only my younger sister was in. We got to talking and I told her that Im seeking the help of a therapist, though I didnt say what for. baby steps.

A little later on she told me that my parents arent talking, and havent been for about a fortnight.

I dont know what to do. Im thinkinh having a son / daughter in a situation like mine might be either the catalyst to get them talking again or the straw that breaks the dromedary.

Link to comment
Guest Leah1026
I dont know what to do. Im thinkinh having a son / daughter in a situation like mine might be either the catalyst to get them talking again or the straw that breaks the dromedary.

Do what you must for you. Don't guilt trip yourself over what your parents may or may not do. They are responsible for their own lives, not you.

Link to comment
  • Admin

If this is a serious rift between the two of them, it has been coming on probably longer than your GD, because it started long before you were born. No bet, but my experience makes this seem safe to imagine.

As Leah said, do what you have to and do not try to let them guilt trip you. They are both over the legal age to vote and buy booze just as you are (or will become). You may even get to see them from a "parent's eye view" which will teach you something. I doubt that your coming out will have any impact on what they do in regard to each other, but if they are shooting at each other, you could get hit in the crossfire. Let them keep their minds on their issues and you stay out of them. You are out of the house. I know you care about them, but my kids say that I and their mother's divorce made things easier on them by quite a distance.

Link to comment
Guest MsGsptlsnz

I'd try to find out what "not talking" means. My mom and dad dont "talk". My mom tells dad what to do and he grunts. They are doing fine. Well, fine for my parents... They're going on 45 years married, and I don't know if my father has ever spoken a complete sentance to my mother.

Are there evil looks? Glares? Thrown ashtrays? Shots fired?

Might just be my own screwed up childhood speaking here but I don't see a problem until something gets broken. You should leave them alone to work out whatever it is, until one tries to kill the other. Then maybe get involved. If it's safe...

Link to comment
Guest lostflower

I learned the hard way you can't let yourself get dragged into a fight between your parents

It's not up to children to fix their parents

They need to fix their problems all by themselves if they haven't figured out how to communicate without talking at each other instead of to each other and ranting and screaming

You have your own problems and a life of your own to live.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   8 Members, 0 Anonymous, 253 Guests (See full list)

    • Mmindy
    • Nonexistent
    • MaybeRob
    • missyjo
    • MAN8791
    • VickySGV
    • Ashley0616
    • Adrianna Danielle
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.8k
    • Total Posts
      770k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,089
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Kai P
    Newest Member
    Kai P
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Britton
      Britton
      (53 years old)
    2. chipped_teeth
      chipped_teeth
    3. james-m
      james-m
    4. jenny75
      jenny75
      (34 years old)
    5. KASS13
      KASS13
  • Posts

    • Mmindy
      Good evening Blake.   Welcome to Transgender Pulse Forums.   Best wishes, stay positive and motivated.   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Nonexistent
      Thank you.    Trans men and trans women each have their own struggles for sure, but I agree, it can be a hard time to be a non-passing trans guy. There is no specific "man clothes" that only men wear. People could just think I'm butch (which sucks to think about, if people think I'm a lesbian when I'm a dude!!). I mean I would feel better if I got gendered correctly even if I don't fully pass, it would maybe raise my confidence to think maybe I do pass well lol! Instead I'm just reminded I don't.   Though I may just focus on the times I don't pass and ignore the times that I do. Because I rarely remember getting gendered correctly, but I hone in on the times that I don't. 
    • Nonexistent
      Thank you, I'm glad to be here. :)   I have been in therapy for 9 years but still can't seem to accept myself. I think it has to do with growing up trans in a world that hates us, especially in the south. I mean I was discriminated against by adults and ostracized as a kid/teen due to being trans. My family is accepting, but the rest of the world is not. I realize now a lot of people are accepting (even unexpectedly, like my partner's conservative republican Trump-loving parents lol), but it feels like my brain is still in survival mode every time I exit the door. I am a very fearful person.   My body still may change over time, but it feels like I haven't met the same 'quota' (don't know the right word) that a majority of other trans guys have on far less time on T. Most trans guys pass easily 1-3yrs on T, I'm double that and still don't pass well except my voice.
    • Nonexistent
      Thank you. I am just used to seeing trans guys who pass at like... 6 months to 1 year, at the most 3 years. And I just don't meet the mark, all the way at 6 years. It is possible with time I will masculinize more, but it's frustrating when I'm "behind" and may never catch up. It threatens my mental health mostly, possibly my physical health if I'm visibly trans (though I don't ever go out alone). 
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Boss is happy with everything with me and said I will be the only one that works on one customer's truck.This customer saw me clean a small grease spot in the inter of his Kenworh last week,on the steering wheel.A new customer too,saw me walk out with my tub o' towels wiping that grease stain off.This one,he cannot stand a grease spot in the interior.
    • Nonexistent
      Yeah, I am grieving the man I "should" have been. He will never exist, especially not in my youth. But I don't know how to healthily go about it instead of fixating on the life that could have been.
    • EasyE
    • VickySGV
      Going to the conventions has been one of my ways to deal with this stuff. 
    • Nonexistent
      Sorry it took me a while to respond!    I would like to get to know you. :) I only have mental disabilities. Schizoaffective disorder, depression, and anxiety. The last two are severe and very treatment-resistant. I did have physical problems for some time, but it was caused by an antipsychotic medication (Invega). It basically crippled me, muscle weakness/fatigue, basically could barely walk (used mobility devices) and doctors were useless since they didn't suspect the medication I was on! I've finally ditched antipsychotics (hopefully for good, unless my symptoms come back). I usually don't share like this, especially in person, but hey, I'm anonymous. :)   I'm not expecting reciprocation at all btw, these things are personal. There is more to us than disabilities, so tell me about yourself if you still wanna talk!
    • EasyE
      thanks for the insight ... good to know things are being well thought-out ... it is no easy topic for sure, as many of us on here have been wrestling with this stuff for years and decades...
    • Ashley0616
      @KymmieLWOW! He is absolutely horrible! Definitely one of the worst boss's. 
    • KymmieL
      Well the boss is at it again. They misplaced a work order thinking I was the last one who had it, yesterday morning. I know where it is. Last thing I did with it was put it back on the counter. He accused me a couple times of having it last and put it somewhere. Come to find out, the other boss (his wife) had taken it. she put the work order paper in the recycle box.   Has he apologized about the accusations. He!! no. I am waiting for hadies to get frost bit.   So that was my morning.  But it is finally warming up here. currently 63 and windy.   Hugs, Kymmie
    • MAN8791
      I am gender fluid, leaning heavily towards trans masc. My eldest is male and despite all the "stuff" we deal with with him (autism, speech delay, etc) I found him to be easy to raise. When my middle kid (female) was born, literally the first words out of my mouth were "I don't know how to raise a girl!" And I really felt I didn't know. She showed me. She's still showing me how to exist as comfortable and completely secure in her gender expression. It is entirely awe inspiring to see all three of them feel so settled in their bodies in ways that I never, ever felt or feel to this day.
    • Ashley0616
      That sounded like an awesome opportunity to dress as your actual self. I have to say I'm a little jealous lol. I never got compliments from people and definitely haven't been kissed. I can imagine that part was still really nice and boosted your confidence.
    • Ashley0616
      Welcome what kind of gaming do you like?
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...