Back and coming out at work (at last!)

[Guest Mori]

For some reason I have not been on this site for awhile. mostly because nothing has been happening I guess...

anyways...

I have been thinking seriously about coming out at work for a few weeks now. I keep backing out at the last moment though...tonight I'm feeling really ready to do it tomorrow. I know my company is great and there should be no danger in losing my job. One of my co-workers knows (she's genderqueer and on T) and having someone at my back makes me feel more ready. I'm going to take a note book with my own notes so I dont trip up and so I have some links for them if they need more info. My plan is to go to HR tomorrow and tell them, then a meeting with HR and my managers soon after. (Store and department.)

The main issue I am worried about is bathrooms (but I guess thats pretty normal) Ive never gone into the mens room (due to not feeling brave enough.) Luckily the employees have a seprate bathroom from the one shoppers use, so I feel less worried.

another issue is binding. I cant do it everyday for various reasons...so what if they think im not serious? Perhaps some tips on hiding a chest when I cant bind or wear a lot of layers?

Any tips on how to just do it and not back out? Basicly i need some way to not chicken out because I am ready to do this

-Vincent

[Carolyn Marie]

Vincent, do you know what the company policies are, if any, regarding workplace transition and non-discrimination? Do you know what the local or state laws are? You should know those before you approach HR, just to be on the safe side. Do you plan to transition immediately, or wait to prepare some training for managers and staff?

I know that at the time you feel you're ready, you want everything to happen as fast as possible. But there are consequences to rushing. I would get some of the information I mentioned first, then talk to one trusted person in HR, and take it slow. Preparation, training, education, and process can be critically important to making this a success. Have you changed your name legally? Do you need to do that before your personnel records can be changed? There is a lot more to it than just making the "big announcement" and having everyone embrace the new you.

I'm not trying to throw a monkey wrench into your plans, I just want you to be sure this is necessary now, and to really plan for this. I wish you luck.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Guest Mori]

I know that their policy on anti discrimination covers gender identity just as the local policy does. I can't afford to transition fully just yet but I'm saving up for it. I already live every other aspect of my life as a man. As for a name the only thing i care about right now is my nametag and the way i am addressed. My name change is not legal yet so i know none of my official records can be changed just yet but they have no problem if our name tag is different from the official stuff. I don't know the exact policies on transitioning at the company because they are not laid out in black and white in my handbook. That's the sort of thing i need hrs help to find out.

Mostly i just want HR to know so we can start planning.