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Guest John Chiv

I know that I believe that sometimes there is this indefinable connection that goes beyond description or definition. And I have only felt it once in a lifetime.

And maybe when I can finally look in a mirror and see the real me i will be able to accept it should lightening strike twice and it come my way again

Johnny

Johnny,

Once again a thought-provoking post and thread from you and I look forward to the responses. What I wanted to say was that while your entire post was wonderful, the above sentences stood out and I hope lightining strikes twice for you.

Your lil bro,

John

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Guest EvenClose

My g/f was getting dressed for a shopping trip. She goes into the closet to grab a pair of activewear pants. Comes out and continues getting dressed....UNTIL..the pants didn't fit. She couldn't get them on and at that moment she looked at me and realized they were not hers....Priceless.

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Guest Krisina

Yes the ways others react are funny and sometimes not so funny. If you are looking more attractive and all.

I have lost a a friend i had known for years who had said I looked scary. That was about the first time I dressed up in front of him years and years ago at Halloween. He said this to me last year. He said I looked scary because I looked like his ex girlfriend, who was good-looking too btw. He said I was scary because I looked better than her. I subsequently talked all about my transgender stuff about going to see a GT gender therapist going to do this and that. Showed off some outfits. Needless to say I don't know if he wanted to hit me or jump on top of me. He is a straight guy and I messed him up mentally in regards to his own thinking of his sexuality. He doesn't see me as a woman with wrong plumbing but as a guy looking like a woman. I think that is what he thinks. I was attractive to him and that confused him.

He is no longer a friend and doesn't call anymore or return calls. Confused guy.

Krisina

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Guest CattalieChan

oh and sonic shuffle was really really bad.

and i prefer to think of sonic as aromantic, as that is mostly how he's portrayed... but that's just me.

and sonic generations is going to be so good!!!

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Guest ignota

Hey Riana :)

Just found this.... i had a few thoughts.

Tucking is something you might want to try - it allows you to forget about the thing down there and makes it look smoother. There's plenty of info floating around on that subject. There are even transgendered models who use surgical tape so they CAN wear swimsuits. I guess it just takes practice.

I can completely understand the motherly instinct, i think i've had that before. In any case, perhaps there are men who need women like us to look after them :P

I hope this doesnt post twice :S

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Guest Lizzie McTrucker

If you have a big frame, avoid small jewelry as it won't be that noticeable.

Conversely, if you have a petite frame, avoid large jewelry.

Gold looks good on warm skin tones. Silver looks good on cool skin tones.

Pearls and diamonds look good on anyone.

A necklace that lays at or above your bosom would be great. If you want to draw attention down to them, wear a longer necklace or something on a gold or silver chain that falls right at the bosom to draw the eye right to the girls.

I don't see many older women wearing hoop earrings. Usually studs or dangly earrings.

Bracelets are tricky. They can either be something that goes with the outfit you're wearing, or something in a gold or silver tone that you really like.

And I forgot who said it, maybe Elizabeth Taylor? Once you're all dressed and ready to step out of the door, take a look at yourself in the mirror and take one of your accessories off.

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Guest Julie T

Angie

You can really make me go all over the place [me laughing]. Imagine me laughing about cancer, and how you are about all that. But it's to keep from crying, mostly. And I laugh when I think of how strong you are, and you don't even know it, And I laugh at your vanity about the avatar, and I laugh that I completely understand what you are thinking, and agree. It's all you have of the old you. The cancer treatment was brutal, I know.

But Angie? The old you? She was a pretty woman, alright, but not as beautiful as the real you, what you are now. I see you shining through, a nova in the dark night, visible even in the daytime. I see you. Your profile on Facebook, your photo gallery, they show the scars, they show your battle.

You don't hide there, not on Facebook. Maybe because like me, you feel a certain need to go gently on Laura's Playground. Too many fragile souls here, we both feel that. You want to be less in the forefront, yet the old memories of what was past? they haunt you so.

But yes, keep your avatar? Or no, show the real you? Or put up a photo of a left-handed aardvark. I don't really think it matters to us here. It's what you feel is best, that matters.

Angie, you are so respected. And Angie? You are so loved.

Julie

I cannot get this duplicate moved to the trash pile - it just ignores the command.

Sorry

Edited by Julie T
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Guest toni2007

There are a number of facial depiliants formulated for men with sensitive skin that are prone to razor burn and razor bumps. Check at any beauty or barber supply. Being a chemical treatment, however, they can cause a chemical burn. I used one years ago, don't remeber the name, but it's got a picture of a man in top ahat and tales as the trademark.

Can't use it anymore, I've developed a sensititvity to it due to some medications I used to take.

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Guest AshleyLauren

Not legally an Adult? Pretty sure that's the legal age for 90% of the planet, the other ten percent are ridiculous places with no law saying when you are an adult....

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Guest DEW1995

Ty all for the warm welcome ! I think I came on a little strong and confusing in my first post, but you all still gave some great advice. I have never worn any womans underwear in public, but today I'm going to give it a try and see how I feel about it. Again Ty for those heart warming words of wisdom. If I have any questions after today I will be sure to check in with all of you!

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Guest CattalieChan

I'm in pretty much the same situation as you. I don't know why your mom won't accept you, but for my mom it was because she doesn't believe in trans people. Try to talk to her about it, but if there seems to be no future you may need to leave her in order to be yourself, like i must do when i turn 18. I wish you the best, and hope that you will stay strong through whatever happens.

just remember that, even if they never accept you, your family loves you.

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Guest CattalieChan

I'm in pretty much the same situation as you. I don't know why your mom won't accept you, but for my mom it was because she doesn't believe in trans people. Try to talk to her about it, but if there seems to be no future you may need to leave her in order to be yourself, like i must do when i turn 18. I wish you the best, and hope that you will stay strong through whatever happens.

just remember that, even if they never accept you, your family loves you.

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Guest CattalieChan

I'm in pretty much the same situation as you. I don't know why your mom won't accept you, but for my mom it was because she doesn't believe in trans people. Try to talk to her about it, but if there seems to be no future you may need to leave her in order to be yourself, like i must do when i turn 18. I wish you the best, and hope that you will stay strong through whatever happens.

just remember that, even if they never accept you, your family loves you.

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Guest MissErika

I wasn't happy until I embraced my femminity, and started to transition. I am still in the early stages and I am so much more happy than I was before, I can't even imagine going through the rest of my life as man.

Just be sure what you do is right for you.

Erika

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Guest Gabochi

Subtle. ;)

Dunno friend, all the forums I ever admin'ed died horrible painful deaths.

Yeah same here. But ill be spreading the word a bit more this time :)

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Guest Gabochi

Subtle. ;)

Dunno friend, all the forums I ever admin'ed died horrible painful deaths.

Yeah same here. But ill be spreading the word a bit more this time :)

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    • Vidanjali
      I appreciate this so much and it's one of the reasons why this community feels like home - a rare treasure among the world wide web. 
    • VickySGV
      As far as things being lost on the Web, accidents happen, Just here alone, I have 20,825 posts showing in my number count, but probably only 19K of them are still actually here to view.  There was a change to a new server a number of years ago, and a segment of the data base they were in became locked and could not be transferred to the new drive in the servers we use now.  Why or how that segment of the data base became locked has not been figured out in the time since but at least we know what happened and it was not intentional or aimed at a single element of behavior here.  Data accidents happen with not one single person really responsible for them or for that matter even the computer itself.  Frustrating as all get out when it happens, but it does happen.  Some other electronics I work on as a hobby had their similar problems here a couple days ago because of the Solar Flares, and power outages or dips in voltage can make electronic life miserable.
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      This is very true, Jani.  The original owner of this site, Laura, and her chief assistants, developed our community rules more than 15 years ago.  They have been modified many times, to take into account changing tastes, mores, technical issues and legal issues.  Sites such as TikTok and X didn't exist then.  Our naughty word filter, as just one example, has been modified many, many times.   On this site, as on most private sites, in order to become a member one must agree to the T's & C's and abide by, in our case, the "Community Rules."  If you seriously violate those rules your membership can be terminated.  So, yes, freedom of speech here is restricted.  Some sites are lax about enforcement, but that has never been the case here.  We guard the safety of members, and your emotional comfort, zealously.  We aren't perfect and sometimes let things get out of hand, or we go too far with restrictions, but those instances are uncommon (IMO).   Every site has different standards.  Luckily, for every interest there are numerous sites and it's usually easy to find one that fits your needs and temperament.  When it comes to the Internet, one size does not fit all.   Thanks for your question, @Ladypcnj.   Carolyn Marie
    • Ladypcnj
      Thanks Jani and Vidanjali, it helps me understand more. 
    • Vidanjali
      If I take time to type something up which I find personally important or impactful, I will first type it on a Word document or on the notes app on my phone and save it before sharing it online if the intention of the writing was to be shared in that way. Indeed, it is extremely frustrating for that sort of work to vanish when it was an emotional experience to have recounted and written it. But if it does happen, my advice would be to try to focus on having had the personal catharsis of transforming the thoughts into words. Even if the writing has vanished, your intention was acted out. You cannot control the results, whether it disappeared or not. So we can try our best to focus on gratitude for having been able to express what was expressed in the way it was expressed, rather than disappointment over it not bearing the fruit we expected it to. From a higher point of view, all things of this world are non-permanent. So when something like that happens, at best we can view it as an opportunity to practice mitigating grief over non-permanence of all things. All this is easily said - I acknowledge it is challenging. But without challenge, we do not grow.   As far as freedom of speech is concerned, my view is that implicit in freedom of speech is duty in exercising that freedom responsibly. That means applying ethics to speech. One may ask, "whose ethics?" which is a valid question. The answer is, your ethics. If you wish to participate in a community with a specific code of rules or ethics, it is up to you to use your art and skill to express yourself within that framework. Of course in certain contexts it becomes imperative to speak up, breaking the rules - blowing whistles as it were. But that likewise should be done skillfully as much as possible. If one feels unduly constrained within a community ethical framework, one may also exercise their freedom to not participate in that community. It is a balance, like anything else in life. There is no ethical framework which is ideal because this is not an ideal world. So, tldr; do your best and make good decisions.
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      As a private platform the owner can limit what is said on this space.   I'm sure someone with more authority and/or insight into this issue will chime in. Jani   “A few narrow categories of speech are not protected from government restrictions. The main such categories are incitement, defamation, fraud, obscenity, child pornography, fighting words, and threats. As the Supreme Court held in Brandenburg v. Ohio (1969)   The Freedom of Speech is one of the most essential tenants of American democracy, yet that right is not absolute. The First Amendment prohibits States from passing laws that “abridge the Freedom of Speech.” Thus, because Platforms are private businesses, individuals cannot use the First Amendment to pursue recourse against censorship on a private platform.”
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    • Willow
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    • Vidanjali
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