Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

creating depth a year after


Guest Sarah

Recommended Posts

Guest Sarah

Is it possible to still create some extra depth more than a year after SRS? Or is the depth I lost gone for good?

Even though I don't enjoy penetration at all, have a really low libido (borderline asexual) and am in a lesbian relationship, my GF thinks that with more depth I might enjoy it more.

So, can I ceate more depth a year and a half later with daily dilation (1 hour) or does it need to be more? Should I not even bother and stay at my twice a week?

at the moment i'm dilating 1 hour every day for 3 days now, but I haven't noticed any increase yet (it's probably too early to tell, and I'm not good at seeing progression ^_^').

Thanks in advance,

Sarah

Link to comment
  • Admin

A couple of things affect post op depth that can change it a very tiny bit. My depth has been reduced by maybe 1.5

cm due to the increase in the circumference of the dilator I use, which means I basically have the same volume the surgeon put in there, but it is in a different direction. I actually tried my smaller dilator a couple of days ago (my current one is 3 cm wide and inserts to 14.5 cm just inside my labia majora) and the 0.5 cm decrease in width did give me about an even 15 cm of depth. This may be where you think you lost some depth. I am at 15 months and only dilate for 15 minutes per day, and things are staying very stable. I cannot figure out why my depth would affect my libido, My sensations in the area are at the front edge of the vagina where my prostate gland exists in greatly reduced size, and finally beginning at 11 months, my labia minora, clitoris and clitoral hood nerves came into play in positive ways. I am not terribly interested in sex either, but the people who have interested me the most have been the ones who do not immediately go for the place between my legs. Good communication, cuddling and light, affecttionalte touch in many parts of my body can give me a lot of pleasure, but the idea of dilation has taken my focus off of my vaginal area. Maybe increase your dilation back to daily for a shorter time, and involve your SO so it becomes playful and you may not regain a full libido, but it will be fun. Relax on the worries too, the brain is the single largest sex organ, and if it is busy, you will not be able to use it for being happy.

If you must regain a higher libido, my suggestion is to see your endocrinologist and see if your T is too low and could be adjusted by using a prescribed medication. If you are happy though, just ask the Endo at your next regular appointment. We do not have the same type of erotic reactions to life that we did pre-Hrt and GCS.

Link to comment
Guest NatashaJade

I was actually talking with my new doctor about my hormone regimen and we got on the subject of progesterone, which I started taking after GRS. Where prior to it, my libido was very low (not surprising considering my near flatline t-level), afterwards, it has become quite...healthy. This is not an uncommon reaction.

As for depth, I'm right there with Vicky. If I use a narrower dilator, I get greater depth than #4, which is all the girth. What I have found, however, is that with your standard jackrabbit style vibrator, I have all the necessary depth for proper use. So really, I'm not all that concerned :D

Tasha

Link to comment
  • Admin

Tasha got it right about the toys making life more interesting.

Link to comment

If depth has been lost, I don't know how successful people have been at regaining it. I have heard of people achieving reasonable results fairly close to when they had surgery. A year, I don't know.

I suspect one question is if this is depth you are trying to re-gain that was lost, or more than what you had after surgery.

Link to comment

I found that natural dilation works way better than the plastic. I have gained well over half an inch after I became sexually active. It does take a very patient partner in the beginning, but now sex seems just, well, normal? I suggest you call your surgeon and ask their advice on what to do. Dilation doesn't have to be a solo thing either. If you have a willing partner, you can make dilation much more pleasurable and therefore push a little harder if it is incorporated in natural ways. It's kinda hard to be G rated when talking about this subject.

Call your doc.

Talk with your partner about adding toys.

Best of luck

N

Link to comment
  • 2 weeks later...
Guest Sarah E

In theory Sarah you can regain any depth that has been lost to you, but you'll have to work hard to do it and I guess it won't be a pain free experience either :( I'm 8 years post op now but half an inch shallower than I was to begin with despite regular dilation. Our vaginas have a natural tendency to atrophy over time as a result of what our bodies sense as an injury. I also lost depth because I too am fairly low in the libido stakes (despite having normal oestrogen levels and a boyfriend) and because I find penetration to be uncomfortable and dilation is sometimes quite painful too. Rather than a rock solid stick of plastic I find certain size and shaped vibrators are a lot easier for me to insert and they're pleasurable too :) As a woman, you can discover plenty of ways to find pleasure from your body without needing deep penetration. I would say that rather than worrying too much about lost depth, just find the right mood and then encourage your GF to explore your body and to have fun finding out what works nicely for the both of you :)

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   2 Members, 0 Anonymous, 124 Guests (See full list)

    • VickySGV
    • April Marie
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      769.3k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,057
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Aleksandria
    Newest Member
    Aleksandria
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Conner_Sent_By_Cyberlife
      Conner_Sent_By_Cyberlife
      (22 years old)
    2. CtN1p
      CtN1p
    3. heyim_finn
      heyim_finn
      (21 years old)
    4. Jayn
      Jayn
    5. joni_girl_1988
      joni_girl_1988
      (51 years old)
  • Posts

    • Ladypcnj
      Thanks Sally Stone
    • KymmieL
      Thanks, Mindy. It has been so far. Tomorrow, work some more on the wife's grand monkey. Got the right side of the hood primed, just need to do a little more work on the left then I can prime it. Then a 600grit wet sand.   I promised the wife we would take out the bike this weekend.   Kymmie
    • JessicaMW
      During my last visit with my psychologist (who has agreed to provide required letters of recommendation along with a colleague to provide the second) we discussed the shift towards my wife's acceptance. It was a long discussion but one point I mentioned was how much the two of us sitting down and watching this documentary helped:  The Kings | A transgender love story (2017)
    • Betty K
      Oops, I did not mean to post that comment yet! I was going to also say, having read a mountain of commentary on the Review, I think Julia Serano’s response (linked by Vicky above) is the most accurate and thorough. You can also read a non-paywalled version at Substack: https://juliaserano.substack.com/p/the-cass-review-wpath-files-and-the   To me the three key areas in which the review is deficient are:   1. As has already been said here, its views on social transition;   2. Its attempts to give credence to the “ROGD” theory (without ever actually mentioning ROGD because presumably a canny editor knows that would be too transparently transphobic);   3. To me, most crucially, its claims about trans youth and suicide, which are dealt with summarily in about five pages and do not stand up to any deeper scrutiny.    I will be writing about each of these issues in isolation over the next few weeks and appearing on a radio show and podcast to discuss them late in the month. I will post links to these on TP later if anyone is interested.   All that said, I actually think it’s dangerous for us to respond with outright vitriol and condemnation to the review since, like any effective piece of disinformation, it does actually contain some factually based and even helpful recommendations. The Tavistock Gender Identity Service really was underfunded and understaffed and certain staff were not adequately trained. Trans kids really were funnelled away from mental-health support once they started gender-affirming care too. So yes, more investment in youth psychology services would help, as would a less centralised model of care, more training in treatment of trans kids, and more research.   One last thing for now: beware the claim that Cass ignored 98% of studies. That’s not strictly true. She seems to have taken other studies into account but leaned heavily on the 2% that met her standards. Nor does she ever claim that only randomised controlled trials are good enough evidence to justify the use of blockers for kids; just as with ROGD, she strongly suggests this, but is too canny to say it, because she knows such trials would be impossible. For now, I think the best response to this comes from the Trans Safety Network: “[…] we believe there to be systemic biases in the ways that the review prioritises speculative and hearsay evidence to advance its own recommendations while using highly stringent evidence standards to exclude empirical and observational data on actual patients. “ (https://transsafety.network/posts/tsn-statement-on-cass-final-report/)   To me, the scariest aspect of all this is that, if it follows Cass’s recommendations, the NHS will very likely follow Finland’s recent model of trans care, which seems to amount to a prolonged form of conversion therapy. I can’t find the link right now, which is probably lucky for anyone reading this, but I bawled my guts out reading the testimonies of kids who had been mistreated by that system. Truly horrific. To me, at least from my Australian perspective, the Cass Review is the most frightening development in trans rights in recent years. To me, the safe care of trans kids is THE number one issue in politics atm.   Ruth Pierce has a good summary of responses from trans folk and their allies sk far: https://ruthpearce.net/2024/04/16/whats-wrong-with-the-cass-review-a-round-up-of-commentary-and-evidence/    
    • Sally Stone
      Welcome to the wide, wild world of transgender, M.A.  It can definitively be overwhelming, but everyone here is amazing, so no doubt you'll get bunches of wonderful support. I think you'll be happy you found us.   
    • Sally Stone
      @Ladypcnj  This is so true.  I think all of us here have had a post or two that didn't get a response.  Sometimes, it's as simple as adding to your original to post for a clearer explanation, or re-reading what you wrote originally, and rephrasing it.  But don't despair, we aren't ignoring you.   Hugs,   Sally 
    • Willow
      So, we left for lunch in our Taos, talked and went to the dealer and came home with the Cadillac.  
    • Betty K
      I have just finished reading the Cass Review, all 380-odd pages of it, and am totally open to questions including via DM if anyone wants more information on it
    • Abigail Genevieve
      What season are you?  If you don't know, look around on the internet. Or ask a girl friend..  Maybe someone here is even a color consultant?   And there are guides on figure-flattering clothes for all shapes that you should look into.    Abby
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Just know that your kids will probably turn out OK, in spite of the chaos.  One of my partners was widowed in her very early 30s, left with 3 kids.  They're teens now, and one graduated a year ago and is working, but still living at home.  A few bumps in the road, but the three are turning into responsible young adults.  It is amazing how resilient kids can be.  They should be able to handle your changes as well.
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Had my time with my 2 long friends I was in the Army with.We went through the photo books and talked memories.They also found about the guy that bullied and sexually assaulted me.He is in prison,sexually assaulted and raped 2 women off base.Doing a 40 year sentence for this and was dishonorable discharged
    • Cindy Lee
      I've been transitioning now for eight months but have been wearing women's clothing for 2+ years. I am over weight and approaching my 72nd birthday. I have purchase my solid color clothing online and recently graduated to 'V' neck tops. I have been hesitant to get anything more girly due to family issues, though with my hair style I am able to totally pass when dressed in a skirt and blouse.   About two  months ago I finally went and got my nails done (which I truly which I had done long ago) though not red nor pink (again family issues). To date I don't think I am having problems with being trans unlike others seem to have. The biggest problem I am having is with my clothing. Any suggestions my girl friends might have would be greatly appreciated.   Cindy
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Umm.... if a post is ignored, live with it?   My stuff gets ignored sometimes, and its OK.  My life is different, and may seem kind of wacky to others.  Some folks just can't relate, or if I'm needing advice they just don't have it.  Diversity is like that sometimes.  If your post gets missed, don't take it personally.  Also, stuff that is new on weekends seems to get ignored more, since most folks are busy with family or other stuff during that time.  Overall, I think people here are pretty helpful. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      I'd really love a professional stove.  There's actually one I want at Lowes, but its like $6k.  I've got plenty of money, the issue is that I'm not the queen (king?) of my den.  Or even of the kitchen.  My partner (husband's wife #1) owns that territory, and she's very attached to what she's got.  One of our stoves has 6 burners and a large oven, the other has 4 burners and a regular household sized oven.  And of course, there's always the wood-burning equipment.    Today was interesting.  We had the first campaign fundraiser for our sheriff and my sister.  My sister is running to be constable of our township.  Pretty sure she'll win, as her opponent is an old dude who is mostly running on "Don't elect a woman for a man's job"    What's weird is our sheriff is running as a Democrat, but he's conservative.  And his Republican opponent sounds like a leftist.  Welcome to Upside-down-ville   And of course all the kids got the chance to sit in a sheriff's car, and play with the lights.   We had a barbecue lunch and a dessert auction.  I baked three apple pies for it, and I was shocked that they sold for $20 each, since my cooking isn't that great.  My partner made her famous "Chocotorta."  It's like a chocolate layer cake with cream cheese, sweetened condensed milk, and it tastes amazing.  Usually we have it for Christmas and other really special occasions.  Two guys got into a bid war, and it sold for $175!!!    Yep, this is politics in the South.  Barbecue, pies, and police cars.  A great way to spend a Saturday
    • Davie
      Yes. That report is part of a conspiracy to torture and murder trans people. It is a lie. It is evil.
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...