An eye opener for me

[Guest Faith gibson]

Hi,

If you've read my intro you have seen that I'm an educator and love my profession.

A short while ago I was contacted by another school's counsellor and advised that she had been able to bring a person from a larger center to our small community to talk about transgender issues with their grade 8 students and asked if I'd like to bring our kids over.

This presenter also was willing to give a talk on the preceeding evening to any concerned parents.

This was big news for me, and very surprising as this community is very conservative in their views. I, of course, told her I was very interested in her endeavors and congratulated her on initiating this much needed presentation.

I attended the parent evening and the turn out was very small but the presenter did an excellent job talking about the gender spectrum.

The next day was the presentation for the kids.

Before I am able to engage in something of this nature I have to obtain parental permission. I talked to the kids and told them their attendance was voluntary. Take home the permission and information slips and have your parents look them over. They all came back positive except one and that boy changed his mind when he saw everyone else was going.

The kids went, listened politely and when I questioned them about it afterwards, they all had positive things to say about what they heard.

Here's what was the eye opener. A number of parents phoned to complain about this even after their kids opted to go. This was kind of expected I guess but several more staff members raised their concerns to me saying school wasn't really the place to introduce this to children so young. They had such negative comments, both parents and teachers, that I was a little taken back. My argument to them was that the kids all said they took something from the presentation and felt better because they felt they now knew more. How could it be a bad thing to teach acceptance of others?

I was hurt. Especially by the staff members. All good people and people who attend church and do a lot for the community in other areas.

I guess our children (their children) may develop into more well rounded people than the parents. I guess that will depend though on how much negative influence, regarding this issue, parents and others will be able to exert on them over the next few years.

[Charlize]

I think you should be commended. 13 is certainly not to soon to at least begin to see that differences exist in the world of gender. Hopefully the children will learn a tolerance that should also be found in the churches their parents attend.

Best of luck.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Carolyn Marie]

I don't think it would matter the age of the children, the parents who complained would still complain. And they complained even after giving their consent to their children's attendance?

A lot of people have their ideas shaped by the media. All they hear on the stations they likely listen to are horror stories about bathroom predators and psychologically damaged, confused transfolk with a "social agenda." They are preconditioned to distrust and fear.

More's the pity.

Carolyn Marie

[Guest]

Hi Faith,

The ignorant ones will fear and mistrust us. Some folk are willfully ignorant, but most are simply uninformed. It takes a lot of education to change a mindset that's existed forever. Teaching the younger generation is a good place to start. Some of those kids may teach their parents as well. Keep up the good work, dear!

Love, Megan

[VickySGV]

NONE of the parents who complained had been to the parent's night before!! Of that, I am very certain. Parental ignorance that is countered by their child's educated view of the world is frightening to the parent. I have been there as a parent, and would like to think I did not let the fear cripple me when it occurred.

Having a 37 year old child who is an expert on nuclear reactor control systems is a bit intimidating, and the fact it is OK for me to know little about nuclear power ( by comparison) has been a matter of self discipline on my part. Nuclear reactors though are not the "most basic information" a parent thinks they need to raise a child. Parents today have little information on human biology and behavioral physiology compared to what is out there. Even I was comfortably given "all I need to know" about "the facts of life" at the time I became a parent. If you believe I really knew enough, it damn near killed the kids long ago!! I have had to be learning for over 40 years and its been hard. Most parents won't keep learning, especially from their children, lest the child realize how ignorant the old folks are.

[Guest]

Thank you for your wonderful Post. Faith.

I didn't realize that you were teaching in N.B..
(Sorry, couldn't resist.)

I am being presumptuous. Congratulations to your School Board for being willing to at least broach the subject.

It is "never" too early to teach people about gender. This is a natural subject which should be taught.

Ignorance is unfortunately passed down from generation to generation. It is usually from the fear of the unknown.

I am happy to hear that at least your students are willing to listen with an open mind.

Keep up the wonderful work. Live your own life to its fullest in spite of what your community believes or thinks.

Huggs,

Joann

[Guest LizMarie]

They signed the permission slips, gave permission, and then complained anyway? There is absolutely nothing nice or polite that I can say about such nonsense, so I will simply say that I support you, Faith, and your efforts to educate.

[Ravin]

They had opportunity to comment and ask questions beforehand, AND signed permission slips, and then complained after the fact? I have no sympathy. If I sign a permission slip for my kid to go on an educational field trip, the only thing that would be complaint-worthy about the content would be if it was different from what was advertised before hand, or otherwise disseminated misinformation. A reasonable person can distinguish "disagrees with my religious/personal worldview" from "not factual" when it comes to misinformation as well.

Sounds like the presentation was a worthwhile one, though--in the end it's unlikely any of those after-the-fact whiners will actually do anything more than complain. They're obviously not all that proactive.

[gennee]

Faith, I congratulate you for what you did. Part of education is to learn and discover things that perhaps the students knew little or nothing about. At times, those things may be controversial. Too many parents shield and shelter their children from any kind of controversy or when an opposite viewpoint is presented. They will find this out in the real world.

The students took it as a learning moment and I'm sure they came away better prepared. Sorry that the parents reacted negatively. They cold have learned something themselves. Too many administrators play both sides and that doesn't lend to a united and cohesive environment.

Faith, be thankful for the students' positive response. Perhaps they can teach their parents and school administrators.

[Guest Faith gibson]

Thank you so much for your support everyone!!!!!

I am proud of the students in our grade 8 classroom and overall I feel very good about the experience.

I have to tell you one more part of the story.

At the beginning of the presentation for the students, before it actually started, I went up and introduced my to the presenter. She remembered me from the previous evening. We chatted fro a bit, no big deal. As the presentation progressed and she got to the part where she was describing the gender spectrum, she decided to call on me and asked if I'd come up and indicate where I fell on the spectrum. I guess she felt because I'd shown such interest in everything, idk. I did not tell her anything about me. I was momentarily in a state of shock. I said no right away and she looked a little surprised that I wouldn't do it.

I've since emailed her and told her why I didn't feel comfortable doing showing where I felt I am. I guess I could have lied but I know myself well enough to know I'd never feel good about that.

Anyways, thanks again - Faith

[Guest]

Honesty is the best policy.

for sharing, Faith.

Huggs,

Joann

[Ravin]

Yikes. Putting someone on the spot and maybe outing them is probably not the best way to illustrate! I'd suggest to get she have audience volunteers who know when volunteering what is being asked do it.

[Guest GUEST..]

I can see why you are a teacher. Its your job and you saw an opportunity to educate. Congrats to you and forget the inability to understand by the parents. There needs to be more open minded people such as you Faith. Again good job girl. Amber L.