Big Day Today, Name and Gender Marker Changed

[Guest sydney]

Today my court order for my name change became official and I already had my letters and forms for the gender change. First stop was the NJ DMV. The first person had to verify with the supervisor, but he was really nice. He was more confused on the court order than the gender change. He initially gendered me ma'am then kept switching back and forth after he saw my paperwork, but he was trying I will give him credit. The woman who actually made the changes had to also check with the supervisor, but gendered me correctly the whole time. (She had never done a gender change and had to check on it.) She let me take the picture a few times (they don't let you smile in the pictures), but it wasn't a bad picture. 30 minutes after walking in, I walked out with my new name and that wonderful "F" gender marker on my license. The first time in my life to happily get an "F" on something, LOL.

Second stop was the Social Security office. There was a 30 min wait, but once my number was called, I was fortunate to get a window that had a seat and was around the corner for the main waiting area for a little privacy. The woman there was super nice. She looked over everything and said, no problem and wanted to make sure it was put in the system properly. She had not done a gender change since the rules changed last. She said it was much easier now for her to do it as they have thankfully become more progressive. After she was done with the paperwork, she shredded my old card and gave me letter with what was changed and to expect a new card in the mail. Then she took a few moments for a friendly chat about my transitioning. She asked how long and how it went for me. She was very curious about it and we talked about it for a while. She commented on how great I looked and could tell how happy I was. She also congratulated me and wished me luck. She was so nice and pleasant to deal with. Still can't believe that happened at the social security office.

Third stop was my bank (Chase). My wife had to come in because of it being a joint account. (Something they require now for the signature cards.) The cool thing is that they print the new debit cards right there in the branch. He updated the name, but the machine kept printing the old name on the card, so he had to disable the card number and issue a new debit card number and my new name was on it. Success!!!

Fourth stop was a late lunch at California Pizza Kitchen with me using my new debit card in my new name for the first time. Now I didn't have to out myself by paying the check with my old card with my old male name. :)

The rest of the financial updates are on the phone. The easiest was Geico Auto Insurance. I didn't have to send them anything. They just pulled the DMV records and that was it. 30 min later my account had my new name, printed temporary insurance cards and the permanent ones will come in the mail. Everyone else I had to FAX a copy of the court order, which I did tonight to them all (2 cars loans, one credit card, medical insurance and House Insurance.) I still have to do my life insurance policy (and my wife will need to update the beneficiary on hers.)

What a great day

[Carolyn Marie]

Outstanding, Sydney! I'm glad it went so smoothly for you. Your new life really has begun in earnest. The name change is probably the single biggest thing that marks the change in ones life. You were lucky to find so many helpful and knowledgeable government employees. There are quite a few of us around, actually.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Cyndee]

Congratulations Sydney, it's a wonderful feeling, you might find yourself pulling out your new driver's license just to look at it again So empowering when you take control of your identity !

Hugs

Cyndi -

[Charlize]

Well done dear. You were one busy girl. It took me a few days more to get to the social security office. I cheated though and went to DMV right after i left court. You have to advertise the court decision for all to be official but they didm't notice that and Charlize walked out with that same F and felt so good. First time i ever felt good about an F. They were nice to me at Social security office in Somerville a few days later when it was actually official. Other things are coming around and yesterday i got my new Passport. Wow it feels great. Birth certificate may have to wait until we get a new governor. But i don't need that anyway.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest ashleynikole]

YEEEEAAAAAA!!!!!!

So happy for you girl. I'm researching name and gender changes in my neck of the woods as my goal is to get that done this fall.

Have fun sporting that new ID and debit card around. You deserve it.

God bless

Ashley

[Guest LizMarie]

Congratulations!!

[Guest sydney]

Thank you everyone!!!!!

Congratulations Sydney, it's a wonderful feeling, you might find yourself pulling out your new driver's license just to look at it again So empowering when you take control of your identity !

Hugs

Cyndi -

Birth certificate may have to wait until we get a new governor. But i don't need that anyway.

I was born in TN, and they will NOT change the gender marker for ANY reason and on the name, you get a copy back with the old name crossed out (but visible) and the new name above it. Hopefully this will change one day and fortunately I don't have to show it as long as I maintain a passport, which I need to do soon. I will still update the name since I may need a TSA clearance soon (for development software in the air cargo industry.)

YEEEEAAAAAA!!!!!!

So happy for you girl. I'm researching name and gender changes in my neck of the woods as my goal is to get that done this fall.

Have fun sporting that new ID and debit card around. You deserve it.

I love TN (Knoxville), but I'm glad I did my transitioning here in NJ. It made it so much easier between resources in NYC (right across the river from me) and LGBT protection laws here.

[Guest Carla_Davis]

Congratulations Sydney.

Hugs,

Carla

[JenniferB]

Congratulations Sydney. The court order for my name and gender change was one of the most exciting and best days of my life. It's a wonderful feeling.

Jenny

[KathrynJulia]

Congratulations Sydney

Your never going to forget this day. The sights and sounds and how you felt inside. That was me to a year ago. People outside our community will never understand how big this day is. They've never felt the humiliation of presenting as a women and showing ID that screams WRONG.

One month from tomorrow I'm boarding a plane and when I return that little bit of maleness that I have detested my whole life will be gone. The journey of baby steps over. I will just be one of the girls. Sydney, this next 12months will fly by for you. When you complete that year, wearing a dress, makeup, and enjoying a good cry over a sad movie will be just another as one of the girls. You will wake up in a year from now and lie there in bed knowing that there is no doubt in who you are. The past year confirmed that your parents gave birth to a daughter who will embrace her future. Congratulations Sydney for having courage to embrace change and seek happiness.

I look forward to your anniversary announcement this time next year. Hugs. Kathy