Getting Reckless...

[Guest ashleynikole]

So I have a friend who plays keyboards in an 80s entertainment band here in Nashville. I love 80s music with a passion. It's only natural that I would attend his shows. Problem is, that for 2 years, the opportunity was always in competition with something else and I had yet to make it to one of his shows...until tonight.

His group invited me to an event on Facebook earlier this week and when I realized it was tonight and I wouldn't have my kids, I jumped at the chance to go. Even better, another friend of ours, a girl I just admire so much (we'll call her Robin), said she might be going, so I messaged her and begged her to come so I wouldn't be the only girl there.

Time rolled around to get ready and leave and I was somewhat nervous but mostly just excited to get to go out as myself. When I got to the bar, I was seated at a table in the back as the show had already started. The waitress brought me my drink and I sat and watched for about 10 minutes. About that time, I looked up and noticed my friend Robin sitting at the bar (little girl squeal EEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!). I was so happy to see her and within a minute or so, she saw me and came over and gave me a hug. She said she was gonna get her stuff and come back over, but her food came out so she decided to eat it first. After a few minutes, the seat next to her opened up and she motioned for me to come over and sit by her. I grabbed my drink and gladly moved.

See, I gladly moved because there was a table diagonally in front of me with 3 couples at it and one of the guys who apparently was getting a kick out of seeing a transwoman (read: me) sitting at a table nearby, would not shut up talking about me. I could read his lips. I couldn't help but chuckle and shake my head, mainly because I thought that his life (and apparently his date) was so boring that he had nothing better to talk about than me. I should've got up and walked over and said, "since you are so enamored by me and won't stop talking about me, wanna dance?" I refrained...lol.

So I spent most of the evening with my friend Robin at the bar having a great time, a great time that felt so natural. There were a few "incidents" that were more humorous than anything, but also gave me a pretty amazing insight into the world of being a woman.

So the first thing was that I got initiated into womanhood. I was hit on by a drunk old man. He tried to get me to get up and dance, but that was NOT going to happen. Robin thought it was the most hilarious thing, but her "just desserts" was coming later, little did she know. Later we witnessed the old man sitting at the bar talking to the empty chair next to him. All in a moment I felt amused and saddened for him. No telling what demons he is wrestling with.

The second thing that happened to me was a woman motioning to me from the dance floor to come dance. She eventually came and got me and pulled me to the dance floor. I have never had so much fun dancing at a bar in my entire life. I danced for a while but then I came back and sat down because Robin had an admirer (we'll call him Jay) who was doing a bang up job of hitting on her. He was kinda cute and very adorable. He was also very funny and the "twerking" moment on the dance floor from him was priceless and had us in stitches. He hung around for probably the last hour entertaining both of us.

During the time Jay was bringing the comedy to the table, I became keenly aware of all the people around me. It was like one of those moments in a Sherlock Holmes movie (the Robert Downey Jr. ones) where he's assessing the room before he makes a move. It was like I was in all places at the same time noticing what each man was doing or how he was acting. In that moment I came to realize what most women must feel like when they say that as a woman you must be alert to your surroundings. I was definitely hyperaware of every possible threat in that place and it was kind of empowering and yet somewhat unnerving. Either way, I really felt like a woman in that moment.

The 3rd moment happened about the last 15 minutes of the band playing. We were sitting at the bar and 2 girls walked in. One went to the restroom while the other ordered 2 beers. I knew right away they were lesbians and after a few minutes, Jay said it in the midst of a conversation and Robin was sort of surprised. I agreed with Jay and said I knew it right from the start. Fast-forward a couple of minutes and the girl that ordered the beers was standing around talking with us and started pulling on me to go dance. As I went to get up, the band ended their last song, but we convinced them to play one more so we could all dance. Jay was able to drag Robin to the dance floor as well (which, believe me, was a feat in and of itself). The fact that he was hitting on her pretty hard and was acting all goofy towards her, made me feel okay at laughing at her in return for her laughing at me earlier. Later Robin asked me how I knew they were lesbians. I said I didn't know how I knew, I just sensed it.

Once the band ended, we paid our tabs, said bye to our friends in the band and headed to our cars (Robin didn't want to walk alone in case Jay was still hanging around). All in all, it was one of the most fun nights I've had in my entire life.

Also, I did learn one thing. I know how to dance in 3" heels.

God bless and enjoy life

Ashley

[Charlize]

What a wonderful story about an enchanted evening. Thanks for sharing Ashley. It brought back some fond memories of some of the gay bars i used to enjoy. I also remember those first dances as a woman and some outrageous young women who enjoyed playing with me. I enjoyed it too! Unfortunately at the end i was most like the old gentleman at the bar talking to an empty seat. I'm afraid that part of life is past me now. Enjoy as you can and remember not to dance on wooden decks in heels.

Hugs,

Charlize

[VickySGV]

Most admirers I ever met were generally nice up to a point, but I did have some funny moments with them. One tried buying me drinks which I was NOT drinking, and instead of letting a drink go to waste, was drinking them himself, although I had sorta been switching glasses on him (I had my tonic water on the bar). Three rounds of drinks, and his buddy and a bouncer had to pick him up off the floor and get him to a cab.

It is so much fun to be out and not give a damn about how we look or if we are clocked, and it does make real life much more attainable as it comes.

[Guest Kayla Grace]

So jealous ashley! I'd love to hit a bar as a woman

Dreams DO come true, don't they?

Natalya <3

[Guest]

Sounds like a priceless experience, Ashley.

for sharing.

Huggs,

Joann

[Guest LizMarie]

You go, Ashley! Great story!