2 weeks of living full time as Marie

[Guest]

I wanted to share this with you all. The major thing i've realized in those 2 weeks in my context is that nobody really care about what you identify as. What they care about really is how you assume what you are. I was so unassuming of my false male image that the switch to female has been a positive for me. Don't be mistaken, I'm not on HRT, still have a beard and still got a male's body. I still manage to get trough the day without anybody seeing 5 o'clock shadow (since I have red hair it's far easier to hide I think).

I've organized an evening with 4 girls from work last week, over here we call that "souper de fille". It was so great. I've also been on a date with a guy (who knew I was trans). I lived those 2 weeks without avoiding any social activities even creating more occassions and been far less reclusive. Everybody where I work accepted me as I am. Pretty much everybody now call me Marie at work and in my family.

My first and more important goal is to live as myself as much as possible and is not to "pass" for now. Right now I must surely look more as androgyne then a girl. I plan to start HRT pretty soon and to start the second evaluation for the surgery. But still what i've done so far as been very positive for me.

I've been very open, even writing a blog about being trans (in french). I know we all have our own way of coping with our issues but I just wanted to tell a little what I've been trough so far so that people that plan to do it a little like me know that it can work and you can be happy without any medical help. My local support group for transgender people also been very helpfull. I've been there just one time for now but they already helped me a lot.

To be honnest all of that is a little hard on my nerves but still i've realized that i've been less nervous overall. I was sooooo nervous as a male, always being on the defense and trying to hide so many things (post traumatic stress stuff). Being Marie helped me overcome this stress...

I just hope the best for everybody.

[Guest rexxmarksley]

It's good to see people being happy and confident as they are, sometimes coming out and going full time so to speak is a big relief.

I hope it continues to be just as good for you

[Guest]

for the wonderful update, Marie.

I hope your "dinner with the girls" went well.

Keep living as your true self. It only gets better.

Huggs,

Joann

[Charlize]

Thank you for your update. I want to thank you for mentioning that we can transition and live full time as ourselves without HRT and still find some relief and acceptance both in the world and even better of ourselves. Many of us seem to think HRT and surgery is all important. It is but just accepting ourselves is an even greater step.

I would love to join you for a "souper de fille" and use my rusty french. I spent a summer in Reims at a lycée and only spoke french

but that was over 50 yeas ago.

Keep enjoying the journey it only gets better or perhaps i should say more natural.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest]

my diner went veerrrrryyyy well. I just looove to be "one of the girls"

yeah for me accepting myself is the first and biggest step because I was very very very unaccepting for a very long time. I'm sure i'm not the only one and that everyone know how I felt.

After reading the effects of HRT and surgery I felt that I wanted that very much but that it was not magic and that I needed to do many things on my own before...

(I have to say that by nature i'm very girly in how I express myself (and that's what caused me a LOT of trouble in school and landed me post traumatic stress))

like knowing how makeup work, how to take better care of my hairs and my skin, what style I will have as a girl (because as a guy I was carring so very little about life, I had no style)

how to deal with social interactions as a girl (with other girls, guys, etc)

and many other things....

since surgery and HRT will take a long time and that I feel so much better as a girl (it gives me a bit of internal peace)

I said to myself that I would start by accepting myself, going full time and look like a trans girl and not a cis girl (I try to be realist here )

because, to me, it's ok and even kind of cool to look like a trans girl instead of a guy. I can express myself a lot more like that.

xxx

Marie

[Guest Mickey]

Yes, accepting ourselves is the most important step we can take. I have not the words to express how much better I felt after I accepted the fact that I was trans. It was almost a year later that I started HRT. In that time period I got even more relief by coming out as trans to my family, friends and the whole world. I also felt better when I started seeing a gender therapist. I didn't feel like I needed to see her but I knew that if I wanted to progress further down the trans pathway, I would have to see one eventually. When I started having sessions with her I realized that having somebody I could talk things over with was very beneficial for me. Over all I feel much much better than I did this time, 2 years ago.

All of that progress started with me just accepting that I was trans. After acceptance I just figured out what path was best for me and following that path is bringing me much happiness. So I will continue along this path and see just where it leads me.