insights from observing myself on video

[Ravin]

For the legal practice clinic I'm involved in at school, this semester, we have to watch recordings of our performances on various practice exercises.

Some things I've observed that are outside the intended scope of the exercises:

1. I look like a guy. My binder does it's job, my face is pretty masculine now. It's wow.

2. I sound like a guy. On a recording it's blown me away how much my voice has changed. Definitely in guy range.

3. I talk with my hands. It's something that is both distracting and comes across as effeminate in a "stereotypical gay male" way. Which I don't mind, but feel I do need to work on for professional reasons. When the time comes to deal with a jury, I don't want my performance of gender to distract them.

Anyway, the video camera let me step back and evaluate where I'm at in transition in a way the mirror doesn't. I highly recommend it.

[StephanieVikingGirl]

Thanks Ravin,

Excellent recommendation! I will need to see if Alex can video me, and play it for me. He has already recorded our voices, and played it back. His voice is still androgynous, but getting more male all the time. I sound like a woman. It really surprised me. He thinks that is helping me pass so easily. That and according to Alex: I talk with my hands like a girl, my sentences are girly & almost musical sometimes, and my body language is all woman. However, I want to see me on video now just to confirm what he has been saying. I am kinda still self conscious, and besides I know that Alex is biased. Not tooo surprising that I am still a little unsure of my presentation, I have only been living full time as a woman for two months after all. Yep maybe video as well as photos tomorrow.

hugs,

Stephanie

[Guest]

That's a wonderful idea, Ravin.

Congratulations on realizing your progress.

Speaking with your hands. That can also be a cultural issue.

Huggs,

Joann

[Guest Lizzie McTrucker]

3. I talk with my hands. It's something that is both distracting and comes across as effeminate in a "stereotypical gay male" way. Which I don't mind, but feel I do need to work on for professional reasons. When the time comes to deal with a jury, I don't want my performance of gender to distract them.

Okay, so you're animated. Many really good public speakers talk with their hands, usually to emphasize points their making. Worst case you can just latch on to a podium or the legal briefs to keep your hands busy. I wouldn't necessarily consider it a hindrance but that's just my unprofessional opinion.

(also ask for some feedback on that from people in the industry that you trust or have worked with and respect. Maybe it's not as bad as you think or if they say "yeah, you should probably tone that down a bit", maybe could offer to ideas or suggestions for that)

[Guest sydney]

Looking at videos on oneself does a lot more than still pictures. My voice therapists video recorded me reading "The Rainbow Passage" before and after my series of sessions. Part of her sessions is on female mannerisms, but for me I already had them.

[StephanieVikingGirl]

Yep, video footage is very helpful in self evaluation. Alex video taped me, and yeah it kinda proved to me that yeah I am kinda girly, and my voice matches perfectly with what I look like. Thanks Ravin for giving us the idea!

hugs,

Stephanie