Job interview- how femme to go

[Guest Raya]

So, I got a call back from a potential construction employer, was referred by a friend. Trades and/or management tbd. Phone interview went well. Employer knows I am trans, and I told him I understand it is a business, and will present a good image, not weird- currently male presentation, changing to female this year. (I started HRT last August, and it's working! I need an undershirt or cami, and may need a sports bra soon. Hips and rear building too)

My work (self employed in residential construction) look now is ladies plain jeans with a blouse and sweater, close shave with no makeup, clear nail hardener. This IS my male presentation- And I'm wondering if it works?

[SoSarah]

Raya, it did for me. I eventually added mascara, ear studs, woman's earth spirit shoe's and pushed up the volume and growth of my hair note : ball cap in my truck for precived situations. I worked with small town utilities employees in the Ozark's. This helped me make a living and stay sane. I,did have to deal with the c-cup sister's in the Summer because of HRT therapy so I just threw the color black at them, no vertical lines. Never had a problem for 6 year on HRT. Smile's...Sarah

[VickySGV]

The outfit and presentation sound great for the field you are in. It is femme clothing but it will not draw super attention to it being "girly", just good sensible clothing that wears well that could be on either gender if the brand names are not showing.

[Guest Raya]

Thanks, ladies! I've worked on my own so long, I just lost the intolerant clients and gained new ones. For this I need to adapt to their clients.

Sara, I like the black/no stripes tip. I'm guessing the darker colors deemphasize the curve shadows.

[Charlize]

Ray the great thing about women's fashions is that you can dress as a man , do a man's job and still be a woman. The cis female farmers i know dress just like i do for the same work. A dear young farmer friend of mine just won the outstanding young farmer of the year award from the FFA. I was amazed at the picture on Facebook. She looked like a movie star with a beautiful gown. (Her biceps gave her away). Normally she is a jeans and t shirt gal. Unisex clothing seems to be the norm now in many professions. Be comfortable and yourself and i'm sure you'll have the job if you want it.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest Raya]

I like that, Charlize, thanks

[Guest Denise007]

Raya, in construction, it depends allot on where you work .. in the field or office? I wear makeup, the rest is female drab as I call it. I've been in the HVAC business all of my 2 lives with nearly 25 years on each side of the gender "fence" the latter being the best part of my life!

Guys will test you, (hopefully they won't) The gender jokes and insults may seem cruel and intentional but eventually die down. Many of us (opinion) are very thin skinned and get real upset but eventually, find a way to turn wise cracks and insults into fun or positive ways to help them understand it's not about them and we are just as human as anyone. . One day you will be old news! Kudos to the Employer for being open to your application. .

One thing (opinion) that really hurts many of us, is this "need" to make everything about TGism in just about everything and everywhere. Seems like it's the only conversation some of us ever make or have. Personally, I don't ever talk about it in real time unless some asks something very specific.

Good luck!

[Guest Clair Dufour]

Any time any place, dress like most of the women there. Setting up Pride Prom last week, some of the

lesbians and transmen were there tool belts and all. Consider it an easy pass! There are so many women in the trades

in the trades now that you can even buy women cut work clothes. Carharts has great fashions.

[jeanniesauve']

I am really rooting for you,Raya.Did you include this info before hand,or tell during your phone interview?I like your choice of attire;I almost cut my nails back down to nubs,but it made me cry...and I put it off....and your solution sounds great!My hair grows thick and curly,but I have shaved my head,for years.I tell you the truth,I can't go back...all the way...if at all!So,this sort of thing is very important to me!I hope your approach is as successful as it is practical!Perfect question at the perfect time!

In your corner...love jeannie

[Guest Raya]

Denise, wow, 25 years in as a gal?? You go girl!

I think it will be mostly field work, with some estimating and pm thrown in. I agree we can focus too much on the TG aspect. In this case we did all the usual talking, and got thru salary discussion first. I brought up being TG to ensure I would fit in there, and start off with open communication. If I was full time now I wouldn't have to do a work transition, but I'm still doing a fade in to my female life. It seems to be a good way for me to go. Partly (mostly?) due to fear, partly an acclimation for me and others.

Jeannie, thanks for the encouragement!

Prior to the call, I wasn't sure if they knew, but I sent my resume with the old name as a big clue. Since I hadn't heard back, I assumed they were put off by the trans issue. Turns out he lost my info, and contacted my friend who initially referred me. I'm generally out to friends, so I was not surprised when the owner said he "did hear something about that" from her.

Incidentally, the owner said he had "different beliefs" but that didn't matter to work. Bravo! Now, I gotta represent...

[Guest Denise007]

oh thank you, there's no edit function on our posts Raya so I couldn't correct the 25 year thing. it's actually much longer. I went full time in late 1983 and GRS in 1988

Seems like you have handle on things already Raya! congrats!

[Guest Raya]

So, I interviewed with the owner and manager, they were very interested, but were balking at the rate I was asking. They wanted a week to think it over, but called back the next morning, and offered a somewhat lower starting salary. I said yes, with the proviso that I expect to ramp up quickly as I help them build their business.

They want me in management, not trades, which is great except for the starting rate. And they said it would be easier to transition as a manager- I'm not too sure about that, but I am getting older, and less wear and tear looks good. And the clothes could be nicer

So, I am pretty excited- and looking forward to working a regular job again.

[Charlize]

Fantastic Raya!!!! Sorry the salary isn't up there but hopefully it will rise with a bit of time. The acceptance is worth a bit as well. Your nails can be better if your not breaking them at work.

Best of luck.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest KerryUK]

That's fabulous news Raya,

Now, I realise that the rate was not what you hoped for but look at it this way. You can stay there for as long as it takes to get well and truly into your transition and who knows? Perhaps you might stay past that. Either way, it's good experience with an employer who is going to be on your side. Once you are settled, there would be nothing to stop you looking elsewhere for a better paid job BUT, you would already be established as YOU and a move to another employer may be a good thing. You know, a fresh new start and all that.

I was a year into 'official' transition when I changed jobs. I went to the interviews as me and was offered the job (that was soooo kewl). I have continued my transition with my current employer and have been through my surgery with this employer too. I am well and truly accepted in my workplace and am really happy. So, make the most of what's on offer and who knows what new horizons may open up for you.

Kerry

[StephanieVikingGirl]

Groovy news Raya!,

Management can be better long term, and saving your nails is good, lol. I have discovered happiness with my job even though I barely make a living. I work in tourism as a wine tour guide, and my co-workers are also counted among my friends. It is a groovy job, and quite fun to do, but it really doesn't pay much, and is seasonal. I am happy with it though, as long as I can make it work. Congratulations on finding a job in which you can transition, it really is quite nice to be accepted, liked, and valued at work.

hugs,

Stephanie

[Guest Raya]

Lots of appreciation of acceptance here! And I agree, it is a big plus, and will help me far beyond just a paycheck. A part of me wants to scream that acceptance should be automatic, and not part of my decision. But there are many haters in the world. I was on a job about 10 years back where a manager got his tires slashed- because he was black. So it can still be a redneck industry, but this looks like a good team. And they want me on it.

[Guest Raya]

And it would be nice to keep a good set of nails, but I expect I'll be field help sometimes, too. So I plan on keeping a pair of workboots handy...