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What Is One of the Worst Things that Trigger Gender Dysphoria


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Guest Alicia Rose

For Shopping.. I just use eBay and Amazon online. Going to the stores still bother me because I see some good deals and just feel too ...embarrassed to buy it because I've never really done that. Heck, I work at Target and we always have good deals on woman's clothing plus my employee 15% off bonus is an amazing deal BUT still I feel like I can't.. grrr!

Just dysphoria making me feel held back.

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1 hour ago, JealousMoon said:

For Shopping.. I just use eBay and Amazon online. Going to the stores still bother me because I see some good deals and just feel too ...embarrassed to buy it because I've never really done that. Heck, I work at Target and we always have good deals on woman's clothing plus my employee 15% off bonus is an amazing deal BUT still I feel like I can't.. grrr!

Just dysphoria making me feel held back.

Hi Jealousmoon,

When I go shopping I just tell myself that if anyone asks me what I'm doing I will tell them I'm buying a gift. That helps me justify being in the women's department. Hope this helps. 

Hugs 

Shawnna 

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1 hour ago, JealousMoon said:

Just dysphoria making me feel held back.

For me, it is gender dysphoria that pushes me forward, and it is family and faith that holds me back.

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I sometimes feel awkward when my wife is buying an A cup and she's clearly not an A. Only one sales asssistant has caught on that i know of. I'm conscious when i browse by myself as well. Like Shawnna though i say to myself if anyone asks, it's a gift

I'd love to be able buy girls tshirts n hoodies (too far for the mrs). The colours are so much nicer than mens for a start

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Goodness...there are several things that trigger it for me. Here are a few:

1. Seeing all those masculine angles on my body when I see myself in the mirror

2. My body hair...ugh! So annoying

3. Seeing hair styles, fashion, accessories, make-up, etc...all things girly that is in-line with my style.

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  • Forum Moderator

I am fortunate to not be bothered as much as i was before transition but i still have a body that is far from my ideal.  At times it gets to me and triggers some of the old melancholy and pain but fortunately i'm happy most of the time and am mostly content with my life and gender.  Mirrors have even become somewhat friendly.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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LIST TIME!

1. Whenever my dad greats me with 'Hello, my son'

2. Whenever I'm compared to my dad, primarily that I look similar to him

3. Whenever I'm called a 'handsome young man'

4. Being told how tall I am

5. Whenever I shave and and I get stubble by sundown

6. Hair in SO MANY PLACES

7. My oily, rough skin

8. My masculine build

9. Whenever I look in the mirror and see a guy

10. My voice

11. My genitalia... The fact that testosterone is made in my, ehem, you know whats... it's almost enraging to me... I almost think of them as saboteurs... 

12. (This one hurts a lot) Feeling excluded from my mum and sister and activities they do because they assume that as a 'guy', I wouldn't want to do those activities with them, so, instead, I'm left with my dad, and we don't have much in common at all.

 

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At this point I think I only have two triggers.

1. Someone using my old name or misgendering me. It happens very rarely, and mostly at work, but I had a coworker say my old name the other day and it was like a knife going through me.

2. When my husband touches me "there", which fortunately he tries to be very respectful of my feelings, but it happens. Otherwise I'm pretty at peace with that part because I've accepted the fact that I need it for my grs this summer.

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Hello EmilyJ,

Why don't you take a moment and make a post to the Introductions Forum.  We'd love to hear from you!

Jani

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  • Forum Moderator

Hi Everyone,

What gets mine going is my very dark facial hair that still leaves a shadow immediately aftershaving it, and those hideous things downstairs.

 

Lots of love,

Timber Wolf?

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  • 2 weeks later...

I wish I could identify the causes of my dysphoria so that I might take some preemptive action (if indeed some form of mitigation was a possibility).  I can go weeks, sometimes even months, and then it comes upon me like a tidal wave.  I generally go on a shopping spree of sorts, but so often the purchases fall short of expectations.  Or perhaps more precisely, the items fail to achieve the desired outcome (silk purse, sow's ear syndrome).  Sleep becomes elusive.  Frustration is in the air I breathe.  Eventually the weariness ( or illness... like bad cold) brings at end to the episode, but my, what a ride.  

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest BobbiLee

Wow, what timing!  Just last night I was watching TV with my wife and daughter and it really hit me out of the blue!  No reason, just hit me really hard for some reason.  Like you Kati, I wish I could put my finger on the trigger and at least have some warning it is about to hit!  I will say that it hits me more now than it did before I told my wife last summer!  Maybe it always did, now I simply can tell her it is hitting!

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