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KymmieL

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5 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

We did discuss name usage. (I don't know if I mentioned it before). I'll be introducing myself with my legal name. If anyone (my wife) uses my dead name, it's nothing more than a nick name. And if anyone asks, I will tell them that I am her wife and the term husband is nothing more than a role in our marriage.

 

Thing between us are getting a lot better. She is getting comfortable with the idea that she is kind of the guy, in spirit at least. She's a tom-boy at heart but also has no issues having a female body. With the new level of understanding and acceptance I can finally be more myself, more femme around her without any issues.

I love that your wife is supporting you now. The hair looks great !

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That’s great @Elizabeth Star, I hope your weather cooperates and your party is all you hope it to be. 
 

Hugs,

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The real question is: Why is the cat wearing a Fluttershy t-shirt?

 

Hugs!

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Good evening everyone the outside movie ? ? night.

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@Mmindy I love your outdoor movie setup!

 

Thanks everyone for your kind thoughts and prayers for our missing cat.  They worked!  He just showed up a few minutes ago, considerably the worse for wear, but alive. ?

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1 hour ago, KathyLauren said:

Thanks everyone for your kind thoughts and prayers for our missing cat.  They worked!  He just showed up a few minutes ago, considerably the worse for wear, but alive. ?

 

Glad to hear it! I'm glad this story has a happy ending!

 

Hugs!

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2 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

The real question is: Why is the cat wearing a Fluttershy t-shirt?

probably because he didn't get to select his outfit. ? :)

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1 hour ago, KathyLauren said:

Thanks everyone for your kind thoughts and prayers for our missing cat.  They worked!  He just showed up a few minutes ago, considerably the worse for wear, but alive.

YAY !!!!!!!! ??:)

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2 hours ago, Mmindy said:

Good evening everyone the outside movie ? ? night.

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We did that last night for our neighbors   Streamed Black Widow!  I like your setup. 

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@Jamie68 once we find the magic dose it should keep me good for about three months.  Whether it will ever clear up completely, I don’t know.  
 

We don’t consider radiation as the poison it really is. You can’t see it, taste it or feel it.  It doesn’t hurt when your getting it.  And know one tells you what to expect three or four years later.  Heck, they really don’t know that you will survive the cancer so why worry about the treatment.  But I think you already knew that.  The first set of shots I had not issues from the shots, and I stopped having spasms almost immediately they started coming back in about four weeks and got worse.  
 

double the first dose, will they last 8 weeks? 12? Or longer?  I will say that this time I felt worse after getting them.  I could not have stood up and walked out immediately.  We sat there and talked for a little while .  On the drive home I was feeling bad and had to stop.  At one point I took a drink of water and chocked, I couldn’t swallow.  That is to be expected since they numb you before the shots.

 

so if we make it to your place, and I happen to have a spasm, I’ll just point and you’ll know why I stopped talking.

 

Omaha is looking unlikely, but Laramie is still a fairly good bet.  Ft Smith is going to depend on the hurricane situation as much as anything. 

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7 hours ago, KathyLauren said:

@Mmindy I love your outdoor movie setup!

 

Thanks everyone for your kind thoughts and prayers for our missing cat.  They worked!  He just showed up a few minutes ago, considerably the worse for wear, but alive. ?

I'm so happy to hear he's back safe and sound.

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Had a wonderful day yesterday with my wife. Started with a walk over to a meditation garden where I first came out to her 355 days ago. We reflected on the year of growth and developments and had a very open and constructive discussion about our relationship and the things we need to do (and are doing) to keep it strong.  

Then we went mushroom foraging in perfect 72 degree weather for a couple hours. 

Then in the afternoon, our local community  (where we did Pride) was having a Roots Musical Festival on the lake plaza which featured a bunch of folk/bluegrass/appalachian inspired music.  We met a pair of sisters and instantly formed new friendships. We spent 3 hours dancing, talking and just having a great time together.  A friend took a few pics on her Iphone in "live" mode which were fun.  I'm not sure if it will load properly or just be a "still" pic here on the forums.  

I also got some great new earlings from a local artist who was at the event!

 

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10 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

I'm so happy to hear he's back safe and sound.

Great, Elizabeth Star! ?

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Sounds like a fun day, Bri. Me and the wife hit the trails yesterday. Of course first stop was for homemade Ice Cream. then to the trail. which wound up being closed on one end. So back track. went a different way home. drove through last years forest fire burn area. talk about depressing. such devastation.

 

Well back to the grind today. but only a 6 hour shift. going to help my youngest hopefully finally get the motor out of his project car. whom ever designed the exhaust on the 77 GM A body should be shot.

 

Hugs

Kymmie

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Our party went pretty good. The couple of people I was worried about causing problems never showed. I had an old friend from high school , that I hadn't seen in 15 years, make it. My brother and his wife showed. The rest were my wife's friends. Although everyone got my name right, I was misgendered by pretty much by everyone all night. I would have though with my almost fuchsia colored hair, cut-off shorts and the lace-up front t-shirt my wife lent me misgendering would not have been an issue. After a couple hours I shut down, stopped socializing, went on auto-pilot, and played the happy hostess who has no thoughts or opinions or anything.

 

The things that saved me. One of the friends brought his daughter and her wife(?). I don't know she's trans-masc or just that butch. Another brought her enby daughter (she/they). I think I was the only one to use They/them pronouns. Later my wife tried to tell me their haircut wasn't very femme or attractive on them. I tried to explain they're non-binary and it suited them just fine. Apparently I know nothing about gender non-conforming people.

 

At the end of the night it down my wife and her BFF. They asked me how I thought it went. I explained the misgendering thing but apparently I'm wrong to be upset. I mean really?!? People I have never met before have a right to misgender me? I shouldn't have to wear a freakin' pronoun pin at my party. Part of me wants to cut-off IRL socializing if this is what it's going be like or do I start correcting people? I just don't want to be that woman.

 

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Sounds like things went fairly well for you.  Unfortunately misgendering is something we have to live with a lot of the time, although it hurts.

1 hour ago, Elizabeth Star said:

I just don't want to be that woman.

As for being that woman, I've just learned to embrace her.

Some things I can't change.

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3 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

Our party went pretty good. The couple of people I was worried about causing problems never showed. I had an old friend from high school , that I hadn't seen in 15 years, make it. My brother and his wife showed. The rest were my wife's friends. Although everyone got my name right, I was misgendered by pretty much by everyone all night. I would have though with my almost fuchsia colored hair, cut-off shorts and the lace-up front t-shirt my wife lent me misgendering would not have been an issue. After a couple hours I shut down, stopped socializing, went on auto-pilot, and played the happy hostess who has no thoughts or opinions or anything.

 

The things that saved me. One of the friends brought his daughter and her wife(?). I don't know she's trans-masc or just that butch. Another brought her enby daughter (she/they). I think I was the only one to use They/them pronouns. Later my wife tried to tell me their haircut wasn't very femme or attractive on them. I tried to explain they're non-binary and it suited them just fine. Apparently I know nothing about gender non-conforming people.

 

At the end of the night it down my wife and her BFF. They asked me how I thought it went. I explained the misgendering thing but apparently I'm wrong to be upset. I mean really?!? People I have never met before have a right to misgender me? I shouldn't have to wear a freakin' pronoun pin at my party. Part of me wants to cut-off IRL socializing if this is what it's going be like or do I start correcting people? I just don't want to be that woman.

 

Glad the party went well for the most part. You're farther along than me with your clothing. My wife won't go along with me wearing fem clothes in public yet except for important appointments. She worries too much about what people will think of her. I get misgendered everywhere. At least I get called by my correct name in public and sometimes at home. I was "Jim" and "Male" for 67 years, I guess I can put up with it for a little while longer. At some point within the next year or so that will no longer be the case.

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Be that woman Liz!  You have a right to be addressed the way you want.  It's not even a gender thing, woman have corrected people on whether they are a Ms, Mrs etc. People correct people on name pronunciation. Why not correct people's use of pronouns? I pretty much always correct people in a non judgemental way. They will never get it right if I don't correct them so... I'm not willing to bear misgendering long term so.....

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20 hours ago, KathyLauren said:

@Mmindy I love your outdoor movie setup!

 

Thanks everyone for your kind thoughts and prayers for our missing cat.  They worked!  He just showed up a few minutes ago, considerably the worse for wear, but alive. ?

Thank you @KathyLaurenand @Bri2020 ? movie night went well, with only light sprinkles. The overcast weather made the projection show up better on the screen. Teddy the older of the two, was really amazed by my remote mouse. This morning the two boys cooked breakfast.

 

Kathy, it’s also good news that your cat ? is back home. 
 

The coffee was HOT, black, and strong Folgers Black Silk.

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@Elizabeth StarI agree with @Bri2020on this, “Be That Woman”. I’m glad you think the party went mostly ok. They should get better as you do more entertaining. 
 

Hugs,

 

Mindy??️‍⚧️???‍?

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7 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

At the end of the night it down my wife and her BFF. They asked me how I thought it went. I explained the misgendering thing but apparently I'm wrong to be upset. I mean really?!? People I have never met before have a right to misgender me? I shouldn't have to wear a freakin' pronoun pin at my party. Part of me wants to cut-off IRL socializing if this is what it's going be like or do I start correcting people? I just don't want to be that woman.

 

I usually just give people my sweetest smile, giggle and maybe a "really?" when they mis-gender me. My presentation isn't especially butch. I walk, talk and stand like a woman. I even got my doctor to knock it off, and he's known me for close to 40 years now.

I generally don't correct people unless they're being obnoxious about it. I don't want to be THAT girl either.

 

Hugs!

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Liz and Jamie, in a personal setting it can be upsetting when people who know about you misgender you.  But don’t let it upset you.  Some may do it on purpose, some may just have trouble getting it right.  I have to admit I have a friend who I have never known as anything but female.  Yet I can’t count the number of times I have misgendered her, and I really don’t know why.

 

out in public, I’m sure I get questioned or down right clocked. But I pay no attention if I catch them looking at me, I just smile and keep walking.  I know I’m not a pretty or sexy woman.  But I look a lot better than a lot of women.  But I still have some male characteristics and I will until the day I die.  I have no intention to spend money on electrolysis.  I shave as close as I can and use make up to hide the rest.  
 

so expect to be misgendered by people but don’t ever let it get under your skin.  You are better then they are so don’t let them upset you.

 

Willow

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