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KymmieL

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1 hour ago, Kylie said:

@Mmindy let me echo; thanks to all the service members. My grandmother whom raised me was Marines, she raised me with such stringent upbringing. So I have so much respect for those who took that oath ♥️

? Kylie, we are very luck to have family and friends who stood up and took the oath.

I did not serve in the Military, because I pursued a job in the Fire Service and Public Safety.

 

This day is Veterans Day and I so proud of those who served honorably.

 

Mindy??️‍⚧️?

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@KathyLauren I am the same as you. I served for 9 years. Never went to combat.  I was never called to play in the sand box. only ones taken from my base where the volunteers which were the glory boys. With my career as Security Police and on the Air Base Ground Defense flight. I could have been flown to anywhere in the world with a 2 hour notice.

 

So yes, Kathy. You are a veteran, pure and simple.

 

I too am a lesbian. I find the male body to be gross. No offense to our FtM members. I find the female body more pleasing. Only female body that offends me and should all woman is the ones who let themselves go to heck. The trashy nasty ones, we have all seen.

 

@Willow As far as your gender marker. For me it was easier to change it on my license that it would have adding veteran status. I just had my GYN fill out a state form. Wa la Now in the eyes of the state of Wyoming I am female.

 

I want to wish all of my sister and brother veterans a happy Veterans Day or Remembrance day. No matter what if you raised your right hand, no your other right. and took the oath. You are a veteran. plan and simple.

 

Kymbrill Lorain Hunter Sgt USAF Security Police. 1983-1992

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4 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

@rachel w I'm proud of you! you go gurl!

@Elizabeth Star did you ever doubt that? 

I am starting to question my own sexuality though.  I've never been attracted to men, in fact, I could never understand how anyone is. That always included myself. I was always amazed anyone "wanted me" physically when I posed as a man most of my life.  The male anatomy to me is outright gross.  However, I've always wondered what it would "feel" like to be "penetrated" as a woman, especially now that I'm closer to having the right parts.  I still feel like a "man being on me" would make me throw up though.  Here's where things start to get weird for me though, I can finally see why people are attracted to certain men.  As I've transitioned and been hanging out with more women as one of the girls, I can see through their eyes more.  So, is it that I am just becoming more open to the attractiveness in all humans or have I just suppressed and rejected my attraction to men because I buried and rejected my female nature most of my life?  Is my abhorrence of "maleness" just a rejection of all those traits that I hated about myself?  Psychology is Soooo interesting.

Thoughts of being penetrated have always brought a quicker resolution for me during intercourse, although I haven’t partaken in it in over a year now. We sleep in separate rooms. I initially suggested it because my wife was having panic attacks over catching Covid. She has since stabilized since getting on adhd medication but I really don’t have a desire to move back. I actually enjoy the freedom that comes with sleeping in my own bed. I think my wife feels the same way. She has accepted my new identity and calls me Agnes and doesn’t seem to mind it at all for which I am grateful!  So do my 3 daughters.


I go for 6 mile walks with my walking clubs a couple times a week and talk to men and women about a variety of subjects. I haven’t formally told anyone my new name except for a couple of folks, but I’m pretty sure they know it’s coming.
 

I am finding myself becoming a lot less competitive in my dialogue, more collaborative. I talked to one fellow for about 3 miles on Wednesday about lawns, gardens and fertilizer and found it quite enjoyable to listen to him expound on his knowledge and admit my own lack in that department and probe for details. Not in any sexual way, just in a shared communication way, being the recipient at the end of the conversation, the sense of someone who had something to offer and was excited to impart it. It felt strangely comfortable and enjoyable. I didn’t feel the need to one up or show off. I don’t know if that makes sense? With others I can also banter back and forth in conversation and that can also be enjoyable. If I come off on the short end of the stick it doesn’t bother me nearly as much as it once did. That may also be a side effect of getting older too! Talking with the women is a lot more intimate in some ways. It’s a lot less guarded than it used to be, I’m more vulnerable. I no longer feel the need to project a male persona which somehow always created static in the conversation with both genders.

 

All in all I’m thrilled with how far I’ve come, even though I’m still pretty much a work in progress. I think most people get that intuitively even though it feels a bit concerning to me in my impatience.

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Hi again. 
 

let me say I for one am disappointed with the lack of veterans benefits. I served from 1968-1972 the height of the conflict in indo China aka Vietnam to most. I served 18 months in Indo China. I had a non combatant duty but I was still in a relatively dangerous place at an unstable time. The Vietnam war was not limited to the country of Vietnam and anyone who thinks it was doesn’t understand military history very well. We were ALL promised VA benefits back then but congress decided not to stick to that promise and changed the rules when they realized how many baby boomer veterans there were. 
 

as far as being a family that served my father was a World War One veteran he was in France on this date in 1918. On my mother’s side I have a grandfather (a few generations ago) who served in the revolutionary war. And with a name like Stewart many of my ancestors were in battles in England and Scotland. Most well known would be Robert the Bruce.  
 

As for being with a man another big discussion today I have played with that fantasy in my mind, but honestly I could never kiss a man. So I must be a lesbian at heart but should I outlive life with my wife there won’t be anyone else. 

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9 hours ago, Erica Gabriel said:

For the most part I think men are stupid. Occasionally I’ll find one that I can’t take my eyes off of wondering “hmmmmm”.

Me too. I wonder also, what kind of stupid game is that joker trying to play off?

 

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1 hour ago, Willow said:

many of my ancestors were in battles in England and Scotland. Most well known would be Robert the Bruce.

Interesting! That is the name on my birth certificate, first name and middle name!

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1 hour ago, AgnesBardsie said:

Interesting! That is the name on my birth certificate, first name and middle name!

 

Oh that's funny. I got named after him too. My sperm-donor is a giant history dork.

 

Hugs!

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1 hour ago, Jackie C. said:

 

Oh that's funny. I got named after him too. My sperm-donor is a giant history dork.

 

Hugs!

The Bruce got around! LOL!

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10 hours ago, KathyLauren said:

I do not consider myself a veteran, as I did not see any combat or peacekeeping duty, but I did serve in the RCAF.

 

.....Thank you for your SERVICE!

 

.....PS. That makes you a veteran!!

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Good morning everyone,

 

Winter is making a real attempt for a cold weekend here in central Indiana. The coffee is really tasting good this morning as the cats and I watch the birds at the bird feeders. The increased activity confirms the weather person's forecast of a dramatic drop in temperatures.

 

Best wishes, and Positive thoughts,

 

Mindy??️‍⚧️?

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Morning started with a beautiful, sunny, cool sunrise. 

 

Several Hot perked coffees later, it has clouded over and heading for a cool, rainy, late day and evening.

 

Plan to finish moving winter and summer items from one shed to other, and putting away hoses into warm basement, then on to do maintenance on 7 aquariums that I have been neglecting the past 10 days. 

 

Time to put behind me, the being misgendered circumstances of the past weekend and get on with ME being me again JUST for me.

 

Have a great day all.

 

Big Canadian Hugs all around

JoniSteph

 

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Good morning 

 

Sorry about the rant yesterday.  Guess we all have pet peeves and that’s one of mine.

 

Yes there are an enormous number of descendants from Robert the Bruce.  When you consider he would be around 900 years old and they all had large families and mistresses who also had his descendants.  My ancestry was Roberts Daughter, Margaret married Robert Stewart the first Stewart King.  Their first born became James the first The second born was John.  I come from John.  James, John, William, Alexander and Bruce are frequent names through the generations.

 

The reason I left northern Ohio was cold snowy winters with frequent bad Thanksgiving snows for warmer states.  After a 35 year pause in Virginia, here I am in South Carolina.  Been here 5 ½ years and I’ve been through several hurricanes and a once in ten year snow storm.  Guess I brought it with me.  We are supposed to cool off this weekend but get warmer again next week.  It all depends on where the jet stream is if we get warm Gulf air or cold northern air.

 

Coffee was good this morning.  @KymmieL my mother always drank her coffee sweet with milk.  My father always drank hot tea that way.  My sister and I, black and strong.

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1 hour ago, JoniSteph said:

Big Canadian Hugs all around

JoniSteph

:coffee:???‍?

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1 hour ago, Willow said:

Sorry about the rant yesterday.

Good morning Willow,

 

Rants are good for the soul, even if no one wants to hear them. Never think you have to apologize for a good heartfelt vent. When someone apologizes to me in person for a rant, my response is this.

 

"I use to call BINGO for 500 smoking old women and none of them were good looking. They were all smoking! Over the 15 years of calling BINGO, I learned one thing. The grumpy ones lived forever and the nice ones died off early. So don't hold back, vent, rant, and know it relieves stress. This easing of stress adds to your years of living." Oh and don 't for get we have BINGO here at the Mapaville Firehouse every second and fourth Saturday, the VFW is the first and third Saturday. If you don't mind the sermon the Knights of Columbus hosts a BINGO every Wednesday.

 

Short story of my life,

 

Mindy??️‍⚧️???‍♀️BINGO!

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Most of my life my parents drank their coffee straight. Now a days my mom takes a little creamer. I never drank coffee until I was married a few years. When I went for coffee with my friends I would drink pop.

 

So, right now my visiting my oldest around Xmas is in the hands of my daughter in law. From what my wife says. She talked to our oldest and he has to talk to the wife. I can understand. Either way it will be a year since I have seen them. Seen my grandkids. it hurts. He has pretty much ostracized me from him and his family. I get nothing from him unless I start it first. I don't know what he wants from me. I am pretty much back to my old self. It is breaking my heart. I doubt he knows how much he is hurting me. If he does he must be getting a huge kick out of it. 

 

Sorry form my pathetic drivel.

 

Hugs,

Kymmie

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1 hour ago, KymmieL said:

Most of my life my parents drank their coffee straight. Now a days my mom takes a little creamer. I never drank coffee until I was married a few years. When I went for coffee with my friends I would drink pop.

 

So, right now my visiting my oldest around Xmas is in the hands of my daughter in law. From what my wife says. She talked to our oldest and he has to talk to the wife. I can understand. Either way it will be a year since I have seen them. Seen my grandkids. it hurts. He has pretty much ostracized me from him and his family. I get nothing from him unless I start it first. I don't know what he wants from me. I am pretty much back to my old self. It is breaking my heart. I doubt he knows how much he is hurting me. If he does he must be getting a huge kick out of it. 

 

Sorry form my pathetic drivel.

 

Hugs,

Kymmie

 

No sweetie, you're fine. You're feeling lonely and shut out because your family members are being passive-aggressive little shits. You tried to come out of the closet and they kicked you back in. The thing is, no matter how much you try to change yourself to be what they want... they know you're not. It's the nature of a phobia. It's irrational. It's the whole, "One drop of ink muddies the pool," philosophy. They know you harbor "wrong thoughts" and they can't accept you any more because of their close-minded tribal mindset. They're hitting all the notes. They're excluding you from things. They won't let you near the children. They won't talk to you.

 

I had a similar experience with a transphobe over here. One of my friends finally asked him what his problem with me was. He said, "I don't want that around my grandchildren." My friend blinked a couple of times and answered, "Then don't bring them here and introduce them." The point being that it's irrational. It's hate for it's own sake and you'll tie yourself in knots (long) before their hearts melt to let you in.

 

I have a friend in a similar situation to yours: She is limiting her transition to fit within what her wife will accept. She's a lot like you really. She can be herself at work. She's changed her name, but her wife won't use it. She's forbidden from pursuing any medical intervention or dressing as herself in the house. She keeps saying, "It's fine," and "That's alright," but I can hear her heart breaking and I can't help but think, "Who are you trying to convince?"

 

I guess what I'm trying to say is that you need to love yourself first. Save yourself. Do what you need to do. Other people will accept you or they won't. You don't have any control over that. Don't stress over it and absolutely don't contort yourself into fun-house shapes to fit the person THEY think you should be. Work to be the best version of yourself.

 

Hugs!

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@Willow and @Bri2020 Thank you for your service.

In regards of my orientation I to may end up a lesbian, I was talking to a girl friend and told her I had no interest in men what so ever and she asked why. I told her because men are disgusting, she looked at me puzzled and I told her I have lived in their world I have heard their talk when women are not around you see girls like me we have been the ultimate spy as we have been in the inner sanctum of maleness and it is not a good place. She first laughed but then stopped and said ohhhhhhhhh!  

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1 hour ago, Billie75B said:

She first laughed but then stopped and said ohhhhhhhhh!  

Truth Billie, except for my business partner, I've separated from all the toxic males in my life. If timing works out, I'll only be connected to him for another year, and 5 months. I do have one guy crush from high school, he's gay and the sweetest person on earth. While I love being in his company, I'm not looking to be with him. My real dream is to stay in a relationship with my wife, and convince her I'm with her because I love her, and not using her as a shield in front of the closet door.

 

Hugs,

 

Mindy??️‍⚧️?

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1 hour ago, Billie75B said:

 I told her because men are disgusting, she looked at me puzzled and I told her I have lived in their world I have heard their talk when women are not around you see girls like me we have been the ultimate spy as we have been in the inner sanctum of maleness and it is not a good place. 

?
 

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@Jackie C. thank you, Hun. that is exactly it. I am female at work, at the VA and when I am out of town, by myself. but male just about any other place. especially with my wife, and anymore, my youngest.  He kind of accepts me.

 

Our middle son is having our family over for Thanksgiving. He invited his older brother and family to come. Our oldest turned it down saying he was on call at work on T day. I think if he really wanted to come he could have asked a co-worker to cover. Probably the main reason was that I was going to be there. If I find out that my oldest goes to his inlaws, who live in CO. I will be lived.

Believe me I would love to attend Tday at my middle sons in a nice dress. but alas I cannot.

 

Kymmie

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2 hours ago, KymmieL said:

Believe me I would love to attend Tday at my middle sons in a nice dress. but alas I cannot.

 

I don't know. It's cold as heck here and dresses are BREEZY. I've got a pair of nice fleece leggings and if we go anywhere I'll be attending in a sweater. Dresses are more of a warm-weather thing for me. ?

 

Seriously though, I don't know if I'm doing Thanksgiving this year. If I get an invite, great. I'll bake something and attend. Otherwise I'm probably going to do a turkey breast in the crock pot (it's sinfully moist), mashed potatoes and instant veggies. Maybe pie. I don't want to have to eat an entire pie though, so maybe not.

 

Hugs!

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Hi

 

had a pretty good day today.  I’ve had a water leak in the area of my water tank pressure pump and plumbing.  I finally moved everything that was in the way.  I could see water and hear it but it took a while to find it.  Turns out the pressure regulator tank had a pretty significant leak. I eliminated the tank for now and ordered a new one. 
 

For my appointments with the hospital for the preop testing and the surgery itself I needed to have something to wear.  We went to the mall and I found a nice simple dress.  Talk about easy on and off.  I had several choices,  this one is a little like a leopard print.  We got hi ladies every where.  Very refreshing for me.  
 

Willow

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You know that you lived in Canada long enough if it takes you a second to understand why people here are talking about Thanksgiving in November. I thought we had it already, last month? Oh, wait, of course it´s the American Thanksgiving, duh ?

 

For those who don't know: yes, there's such thing as a Canadian Thanksgiving. It's in October, and it was actually celebrated before the American: " Sir Martin Frobisher and his crew are credited as the first Europeans to celebrate a Thanksgiving ceremony in North America, in 1578."  Thanksgiving in Canada | The Canadian Encyclopedia

 

Fun fact Friday ?

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1 hour ago, Annette said:

For those who don't know: yes, there's such thing as a Canadian Thanksgiving.

 

Well yeah, it's on all the calendars.

 

Hugs!

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      I haven't been posting much, it's been a bit of a whirlwind: My wife took a job in WA State, meaning we're moving halfway across the country by the end of the Summer. I was told "it would be good if you had a new job by the end of the month", meaning I'm getting laid off at the same time. My eldest snuck booze while we were at our friends' house, had a bad interaction with his anti-depressants, and then had the huevos to lie that he wasn't drunk while accusing us of not trusting him. There's been a lot to process lately.   That said, I got called ma'am for the first time today while out. Twice! I can't stop thinking about it. Later, my dad showed up without plan to watch the Liverpool match and I was way more girled up (see ma'am) than he's ever seen me; hair, makeup, tight top, skinny jeans, and brand new sandals. At one point he pointed at my boob and asked, "is that 'enhancement'?". If you call a t-shirt bra enhancement, I guess? "Nope, that's just me!". Later, my boss came at me all passive-aggressive via chat after hours, too. I'm kind of tired with his -crap-. I won't have a job in two weeks, so it's cool to just assume I'm sabotaging things? K. /eyeroll   It's been an interesting day.
    • Sally Stone
      Post 12   “First Kiss”   It was October 29th, 2003.  My dear friend Willa had purchased tickets for the two of us to attend “Red Hot Halloween,” a public Halloween party held at the Sanctuary in downtown Pittsburgh.  The event was a fund raiser benefitting the Pittsburgh AIDS Task Force.  It was a great cause but it was also the perfect opportunity to let the adventurous side of my feminine persona have a little fun.    My first question to Willa was: “What should I wear?”    “Are you kidding?” She responded.  “This is your opportunity to be the Sally of your dreams.  I suggest you dress to impress.”   My first thought was to dress naughty.  It was Halloween, so it could be the perfect venue for something with an erotic edge to it.  I thought about going as a dominatrix or a naughty French maid.  After we talked about it, and weighed the pros and cons, Willa and I decided against naughty, and instead, chose to wear the fanciest evening gowns we could find.  Willa bought an expensive, silver sequined gown, and matching high-heels just for the event.  Me, on the other hand, I couldn’t justify spending big bucks on an evening gown for a single event, so I took a less expensive route.  It is amazing what you can find on the sale racks at big department stores when you look hard enough.  For a mere 30-dollars, I found a black, sleeveless column gown with matching bolero jacket.  The dress had a slit up the right leg, and it went all the way to my upper thigh, very sexy.  Being a column dress, it was form-fitting, and hugged my curves like a glove.  To complement my dress, I wore black patent high-heel pumps, a long blonde wig, and a set of long red fingernails.  As I recall, it took me three-hours just to do my makeup.  The end result, though, was worth the effort, because I felt like a million bucks.  It’s so obvious, why girls love dressing up – it’s an unbelievable high!   Inside the club it was a sea of bodies and the costumes were amazing.  At one point, I was standing on a balcony that overlooked the dance floor.  I was nursing a cocktail and watching the crowd.  Suddenly, there was a gentleman standing next to me; I didn’t notice his approach.  He told me I looked fabulous and he offered to buy me another drink.  I declined his drink offer, but we struck up a conversation.  Being a little slow, it took me a while to realize he was hitting on me. I never imagined anyone would ever actually be attracted to Sally, which I think contributed to my cluelessness.  So, I was shocked, and initially, a little creeped out as well.  After all, I wasn't into guys, and this was new to me.  As we continued talking, and he kept throwing accolades my way, I went from being uncomfortable to actually being flattered.    The event, being an AIDS fund raiser, had me assuming this guy was hitting on me because he was gay, and he thought I was, as well.  I wanted to set the record straight, so I casually mentioned that I wasn’t gay.  To my amazement, he responded by saying: “neither am I.”  Okay, now what was I supposed to do?  I didn’t want to be rude, but I didn’t want to send the wrong message either.  While I was trying to decide how to tell him I wasn’t interested, he asked if he could kiss me.  Not sure what I was thinking at that moment, I said “okay.”  He kissed me, and as strange as it was, I gave into it, not pulling away or disengaging.  It wasn’t a super passionate kiss, but it was more than a friendly peck on the lips, and I actually enjoyed it.  When we separated; however, I got the sense his passion had cooled.  I could only assume that my response to his kiss sent some kind of message that I wasn’t interested.    Whatever it was he picked up on, it let me off the hook, and I didn’t have to rebuff any further advances.  For this I was grateful, but at the same time, I was actually a little disappointed.  Clearly, I wasn’t going to lead him on, but it was so gratifying to know I had sparked his interest.  Despite his diminished passion, and his obvious realization I wasn’t going to be his girl, he remained the perfect gentleman.  We chatted for a few minutes more, then he gave me the nicest smile.  Again, he commented on how terrific I looked.  Then he added, “maybe I’ll see you later.”    It was hard for me to reconcile how I could have garnered the attention of a man.  In my mind’s eye, I knew my feminine presentation didn’t completely mask my birth sex, so why would a self-proclaimed straight guy actually be interested in me?  Had it been the only time something like this would happen, I would have chalked it up to random chance.  But it wouldn’t be the last time a man would hit on me.  It doesn’t happen often, but it still occurs more than I would have guessed, and I'm always surprised.    I have never asked, but I have always been curious to know my would-be suitor’s motivations.  Were they hitting on me simply because they happened to be fond of trans women, or was their attraction triggered by connecting with my inner woman?  And, however unlikely, did they mistake me for a cis woman?  I guess it really doesn’t matter much one way or the other, because ultimately, I’m not looking for any kind of a relationship.  However, I’d be fibbing if I said I wasn’t at least a little interested in another opportunity to get kissed.   Hugs,   Sally
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