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What are you wearing today?


Ann W

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So good to see you Betty.  You rock your style!

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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  • Forum Moderator

Betty that dress looks great on you!  You got style!  

 

Hugs, Jani

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17 hours ago, Betty K said:

Hi everyone, please excuse me for breezing in once a year and disappearing again. This is me currently, pink mohawk trying to hide the need for hair transplants, but feeling fantastic and free and fortunate. 

Good evening Betty K,

 

You're always welcome to drop in and out whenever you choose. I won't lie, we're in great company when you're here. I love the pink mohawk, and your dress look comfortably cool, as do your gloves.

 

Best wishes, stay positive, and motivated,

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

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@Betty KYou look beautiful! I wish I had your confidence! I’ve yet to buy a dress - skirts and blouses for me - but hope I can find something that looks as good as you do. Thank you for your inspiration!

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Thank you, @April Marie! If it makes you feel any braver, I find people are generally very accepting. I’ve been dressing quite flamboyantly and not passing for a few months now, and have had virtually zero kickback. I also get lots of compliments — almost all from women, of course. I think it inspires them, to see a proud transfemme living her best life.

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5 hours ago, Donica said:

You all look wonderful! @Maddee, It's so wonderful to see you again. You are looking stunning.

Donica!!  Thank you hun. Big HUG :)

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9 hours ago, Betty K said:

I also get lots of compliments — almost all from women, of course.

I do as well, and I don't really "pass" very well.  But they will complement my outfit, nail color - stuff like that.  And yes, it's almost always women.  Can't really remembering a guy doing it.

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32 minutes ago, Ivy said:

But they will complement my outfit, nail color - stuff like that.  And yes, it's almost always women.

 

Isn't it lovely? I find it really heartening.

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Not ready for the full body shot yet but thought I'd share pics of the flats I'm wearing today with my skirt/sweater. For those of us with larger feet - I wear a 10.5 to an 11 in men's sizes - I found this brand (Ataiwee) on Amazon that offers some larger/wider sizing options. I have two pair that are slightly different in design - these are black - and the women's 11.5 Wide fits me perfectly. They were $36.

 

 

Black Flats 1.jpg

Black Flats 2.jpg

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1 hour ago, April Marie said:

Not ready for the full body shot yet but thought I'd share pics of the flats I'm wearing today with my skirt/sweater. For those of us with larger feet - I wear a 10.5 to an 11 in men's sizes - I found this brand (Ataiwee) on Amazon that offers some larger/wider sizing options. I have two pair that are slightly different in design - these are black - and the women's 11.5 Wide fits me perfectly. They were $36.

 

 

Black Flats 1.jpg

Black Flats 2.jpg


Yes those are a score!

 

I look for flats too

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10 minutes ago, Maddee said:

Yes those are a score!

 

I look for flats too

I looked at Amazon and the flats there, while very nice, tended to only run up to 11's.  

Sigh…

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15 minutes ago, April Marie said:

It looks like a chilly day there, too!! I hope you enjoyed your shopping trip!!

It's my Old Hag aesthetic.  Babushka? IDK

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8 minutes ago, Ivy said:

I looked at Amazon and the flats there, while very nice, tended to only run up to 11's.  

Sigh…

Look for Ataiwee Women's Wide Flat shoes - the normal widths only go to an 11 but the wide ones go up to 13W.

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Every day, I get here swearing I'm going to post a full body shot of what I'm wearing or of an outfit I've worn....only to chicken out. It will happen, though!! I'm still just very self-conscious....and a bit fearful since I'm not out publicly.

 

In the meantime, here are the ankle boots I found on-line at DSW in size 12. For next fall and winter, I'm hopeful I can find a pair of knee-high brown boots to wear with my skirts. But, I'm loving these ankle boots with jeans.

 

 

Boots 1.jpg

Boots 2.jpg

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Some pix from the last few months…AA83E876-C677-4A12-AF33-F5140F1D5EDA.jpeg.24e25f2c149dc74570617849e7106ff5.jpeg

shopping day

A665A5EE-E921-4EC9-8A8A-54F65458CDB2.jpeg.2b5e19a38a12c41ec4d880f9cf3a3a9a.jpeg

date night

4A0730A1-B28E-456E-A053-6787FBCE7BFE.jpeg.3a7eb330e0406de59c4a946f342eebd6.jpeg

at work

03091DF4-4FF9-49F2-813A-8D2CD99C2EDB.jpeg.59a8b66ed7d1a4d39cd9a61bff1577b7.jpeg

Costco run

D55FF149-AC9C-42A1-80F3-8D4A9C37E7CA.jpeg.6a05b85da17f03595475c545b411329d.jpeg

another work outfit

3BD9F0AF-0E8B-41FC-8BFD-C1EAB2B17640.jpeg.264bd6057aeb551ba2b3388ada99a186.jpeg

shopping with my wife

01A5ACCC-3867-4C10-96B2-300330572879.jpeg.cc7bbeee7ec503c038972467fd2cf077.jpeg

becoming a wife in Hawaii

25F415DF-61D7-431C-B5BD-3C3841DFC38E.jpeg.dca9526339418729a3da35198733f533.jpeg
bartending at work

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On 2/21/2023 at 8:54 AM, April Marie said:

Every day, I get here swearing I'm going to post a full body shot of what I'm wearing or of an outfit I've worn....only to chicken out. It will happen, though!! I'm still just very self-conscious....and a bit fearful since I'm not out publicly.

 

In the meantime, here are the ankle boots I found on-line at DSW in size 12. For next fall and winter, I'm hopeful I can find a pair of knee-high brown boots to wear with my skirts. But, I'm loving these ankle boots with jeans.

 

 

Boots 1.jpg

Boots 2.jpg

Luv em 

 

 

@Emily Michele

Nice pics

my faves are your pink work top, and the lil black dress number

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44 minutes ago, Emily Michele said:

Some pix from the last few months…AA83E876-C677-4A12-AF33-F5140F1D5EDA.jpeg.24e25f2c149dc74570617849e7106ff5.jpeg

shopping day

A665A5EE-E921-4EC9-8A8A-54F65458CDB2.jpeg.2b5e19a38a12c41ec4d880f9cf3a3a9a.jpeg

date night

4A0730A1-B28E-456E-A053-6787FBCE7BFE.jpeg.3a7eb330e0406de59c4a946f342eebd6.jpeg

at work

03091DF4-4FF9-49F2-813A-8D2CD99C2EDB.jpeg.59a8b66ed7d1a4d39cd9a61bff1577b7.jpeg

Costco run

D55FF149-AC9C-42A1-80F3-8D4A9C37E7CA.jpeg.6a05b85da17f03595475c545b411329d.jpeg

another work outfit

3BD9F0AF-0E8B-41FC-8BFD-C1EAB2B17640.jpeg.264bd6057aeb551ba2b3388ada99a186.jpeg

shopping with my wife

01A5ACCC-3867-4C10-96B2-300330572879.jpeg.cc7bbeee7ec503c038972467fd2cf077.jpeg

becoming a wife in Hawaii

25F415DF-61D7-431C-B5BD-3C3841DFC38E.jpeg.dca9526339418729a3da35198733f533.jpeg
bartending at work

What wonderful pictures!!! I love your style - and I want a LBD so badly!!!

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334043955_1026672858294074_8658105073978162663_n.thumb.jpg.d77dfe76dce165a0f4154f21ef53ead7.jpg

 

I bought this dress from my friend's vintage store the other day, and wore it to see her sing at a warehouse party (where this old car was stored) on Saturday. Someone at the gig told me the dress is a copy of a "mud" dress, from Mali. I had no idea, but he seemed impressed. Later that night I sprayed habanero sauce all over it courtesy of a clogged-up sauce bottle and had to go home and change before attending a Pride party. It was a lovely night.

 

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    • Heather Shay
    • April Marie
      Thank you @missyjo! You do wonders for my ego.   It turns out that pastel colors were the "thing" at Kentucky Derby Day so my dress was perfect. I went with white 5" heeled sandals and a wide-brimmed fuscia hat. Dinner and Mint Juleps added to the fun of watching the (recorded) festivities and races.   Perhaps, we'll repeat it for the Preakness in 2 weeks.   Right now it's just blue striped sleep shorts with pink flowers, a pink t-shirt and flip flops. I can't tell you how much wearing  sleep-rated breast forms at night has done to quell my dysphoria. 
    • April Marie
      I can still rock 5" heels.
    • April Marie
      Good morning, everyone!!   My wife and I had our yearly Kentucky Derby Day evening. Dresses, heels, hats, Mint Juleps and a light dinner while watching the festivities and races. Relaxing and fun. I think we'll do the same for the Preakness in two weeks.   It's rainy and cool here today so it's pretty much going to keep me indoors. Ahh, well. A day of rest.   Enjoy and be safe!!
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    • JessicaMW
      During my last visit with my psychologist (who has agreed to provide required letters of recommendation along with a colleague to provide the second) we discussed the shift towards my wife's acceptance. It was a long discussion but one point I mentioned was how much the two of us sitting down and watching this documentary helped:  The Kings | A transgender love story (2017)
    • Betty K
      Oops, I did not mean to post that comment yet! I was going to also say, having read a mountain of commentary on the Review, I think Julia Serano’s response (linked by Vicky above) is the most accurate and thorough. You can also read a non-paywalled version at Substack: https://juliaserano.substack.com/p/the-cass-review-wpath-files-and-the   To me the three key areas in which the review is deficient are:   1. As has already been said here, its views on social transition;   2. Its attempts to give credence to the “ROGD” theory (without ever actually mentioning ROGD because presumably a canny editor knows that would be too transparently transphobic);   3. To me, most crucially, its claims about trans youth and suicide, which are dealt with summarily in about five pages and do not stand up to any deeper scrutiny.    I will be writing about each of these issues in isolation over the next few weeks and appearing on a radio show and podcast to discuss them late in the month. I will post links to these on TP later if anyone is interested.   All that said, I actually think it’s dangerous for us to respond with outright vitriol and condemnation to the review since, like any effective piece of disinformation, it does actually contain some factually based and even helpful recommendations. The Tavistock Gender Identity Service really was underfunded and understaffed and certain staff were not adequately trained. Trans kids really were funnelled away from mental-health support once they started gender-affirming care too. So yes, more investment in youth psychology services would help, as would a less centralised model of care, more training in treatment of trans kids, and more research.   One last thing for now: beware the claim that Cass ignored 98% of studies. That’s not strictly true. She seems to have taken other studies into account but leaned heavily on the 2% that met her standards. Nor does she ever claim that only randomised controlled trials are good enough evidence to justify the use of blockers for kids; just as with ROGD, she strongly suggests this, but is too canny to say it, because she knows such trials would be impossible. For now, I think the best response to this comes from the Trans Safety Network: “[…] we believe there to be systemic biases in the ways that the review prioritises speculative and hearsay evidence to advance its own recommendations while using highly stringent evidence standards to exclude empirical and observational data on actual patients. “ (https://transsafety.network/posts/tsn-statement-on-cass-final-report/)   To me, the scariest aspect of all this is that, if it follows Cass’s recommendations, the NHS will very likely follow Finland’s recent model of trans care, which seems to amount to a prolonged form of conversion therapy. I can’t find the link right now, which is probably lucky for anyone reading this, but I bawled my guts out reading the testimonies of kids who had been mistreated by that system. Truly horrific. To me, at least from my Australian perspective, the Cass Review is the most frightening development in trans rights in recent years. To me, the safe care of trans kids is THE number one issue in politics atm.   Ruth Pierce has a good summary of responses from trans folk and their allies sk far: https://ruthpearce.net/2024/04/16/whats-wrong-with-the-cass-review-a-round-up-of-commentary-and-evidence/    
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      @Ladypcnj  This is so true.  I think all of us here have had a post or two that didn't get a response.  Sometimes, it's as simple as adding to your original to post for a clearer explanation, or re-reading what you wrote originally, and rephrasing it.  But don't despair, we aren't ignoring you.   Hugs,   Sally 
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