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Still Job Hunting Mid-Transition


KieranD

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I'm in a tough spot with my transition, which I've been in for a really long time. I can't afford a name change, even with the waiver and I've been on the look out for jobs. It's one terrible predestination paradox that I'd like to get out of. I know that the world is binary and I'm not, but I will "default" as male at work, to make things easier for other people (unless I can find a job that's welcoming to people with non binary identities). My state doesn't have trans protections, and it's been really difficult to find a job that pays anything reasonable, with a fair number of hours (part time with 20+ hours a week or full time). I've been putting a first initial on my resume, and job applications with my preferred name in quotes. When it comes to filling out the paper work for background checks, I put my legal info. It's been a tough search, but either people are paying too much/don't give enough hours or won't hire because I'm noticeably trans (at least on paper).

Has anybody been in this loop? How did you get out of it?

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Guest Sarah Faith

Wish I had some advice for ya Kieran, but you might just have to take a less paying job to build up the funds to deal with your name so you can look for better employment later. Hopefully someone who has been in this situation will be able to give some more detailed advice, but I definitely hope you can get it sorted out. :)

Hugs,

Sarah

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Wish I had some advice for ya Kieran, but you might just have to take a less paying job to build up the funds to deal with your name so you can look for better employment later. Hopefully someone who has been in this situation will be able to give some more detailed advice, but I definitely hope you can get it sorted out. :)

Hugs,

Sarah

But the less paying jobs end up being a big ol' waste. $5/hour (after taxes) means that if I work a 4 hour shift somewhere that's 20 miles away, I'm really only getting paid $10 for those 4 hours of work (because of transportation costs). Then there's the fact that I would be taking at least an additional hour or two spent commuting.

I'm just giving an example, but it's also not worth it because of the effects on my mental health as well.

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Guest Maria_B

Sometimes its necessary to take a bit of a dive to get forward, if you can handle the stress and other limiting factors well enough, it may be an idea to take a close to home, low paying job to help propell you into somewhere you'd like to be.

However, I totally understand that sometimes it really -is- too much, and thats okay, only you know what you're comfortable with and what you can handle.

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One can always find ways that it won't work.

And why not a longer shift? Nothing says part time can't be 6 hours in a day or even 8 hours in one shift..

Minimum wage is $7.25, not sure how you get to $5 after taxes.

Regardless, if you identify as transgender, are non-binary as you say, what relevance would name change have as far as getting a job goes? And since a background check may very well identify legal name change, might that cause more of a flag?

More often than not such issues aren't really a trans issue as much as basic people skills, job seeking skills and job skills issues.

The job problem won't resolve itself by demanding more pay and having higher expectations. Usually when one is at the short end of the stick, one has to do what they need to establish themselves first.

I read a report about a survey of HR personally who screen applicants and analysis of the data showed that currently one of the first screening factors has become how long the person has been out of work. The longer that period of time since last employed the less likely other aspects would be considered. For someone unemployed 15 months it was something like only 5 percent of employers would even look at any of the persons qualifications. It was quite scarey and something to be considered if one is thinking about an action that might risk their job.

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One can always find ways that it won't work.

And why not a longer shift? Nothing says part time can't be 6 hours in a day or even 8 hours in one shift..

Minimum wage is $7.25, not sure how you get to $5 after taxes.

Regardless, if you identify as transgender, are non-binary as you say, what relevance would name change have as far as getting a job goes? And since a background check may very well identify legal name change, might that cause more of a flag?

More often than not such issues aren't really a trans issue as much as basic people skills, job seeking skills and job skills issues.

The job problem won't resolve itself by demanding more pay and having higher expectations. Usually when one is at the short end of the stick, one has to do what they need to establish themselves first.

I read a report about a survey of HR personally who screen applicants and analysis of the data showed that currently one of the first screening factors has become how long the person has been out of work. The longer that period of time since last employed the less likely other aspects would be considered. For someone unemployed 15 months it was something like only 5 percent of employers would even look at any of the persons qualifications. It was quite scarey and something to be considered if one is thinking about an action that might risk their job.

If $7.25/hour is the rate, and I have 20% taken out for taxes (I tend to over pay taxes so I get a refund instead of under paying) then it's $5.80 left over, my bad on the math there. I was also giving an example with the 4 hour shift. I know when I was working part time, they only wanted people doing 4-6 hour shifts, never an 8 hour shift.

What a name change will do: make it so I don't have to explain how I identify when filling out forms with legal information. I also intend on getting my gender marker changed on ID, so when they see my ID I'm not questioned on my gender marker. Basically, people would be more willing to accept my name, and (default) gender if I have the papers that only show that name and default gender. Let's say you're a trans woman, on hormones, have breasts, etc and go to a job interview, and when it comes to filing paperwork and handing an ID over you have to say "Well, I'm waiting to get my name changed" and have the name John, and your ID has a person with a full beard or something. I know, it's not exactly the same as my situation, but it's similar.

I also have some things that I put in as filler in my resume and job history so I don't have a gap. Basically I had one large gap of unemployment after the company I worked for filed for bankruptcy where I decided to go back to school and finish my degree. I then had an internship, got a job off the books but that ended because that company shut down. I have a period after that described as self employed since a lot of the skills I have are things I can do on commission or independently.

There was one situation a few years ago where I flat out quit a job. I did put in a two week notice, but the day after I had an anxiety attack at work due to something that happened to me while on the job the day before. I wasn't able to function at work and quit. The managers I spoke to were supportive and after the incident I put in my two weeks but was told "it's totally okay if you don't want to work those two weeks."

I do have a lot of basic skills...there's only been one or two occasions where I didn't get a call back after an interview. It's usually when it comes to providing info for background checks and things like that where I get trouble.

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Guest Bellexia

Yes. I am in that scenario right now. I am too fem to pass male, and not enough legal fem to be fem. It's a awful awful situation. I feel helpless, and I live in Texas so it's pretty bad with the whole right to work thing.

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Yes. I am in that scenario right now. I am too fem to pass male, and not enough legal fem to be fem. It's a awful awful situation. I feel helpless, and I live in Texas so it's pretty bad with the whole right to work thing.

I think Austin, and Fort Worth have protections based on gender identity. Where I am doesn't have that kind of protection.

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Guest Bellexia

Yeah but it doesn't mean they still won't they just hide it under different wording. You weren't hired because you didn't meet our standards. "mcdonalds" IE showing up an hour earlier for the interview, walking the long distance to get there, and knowing how to spell.

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Guest LizMarie

Yes. I am in that scenario right now. I am too fem to pass male, and not enough legal fem to be fem. It's a awful awful situation. I feel helpless, and I live in Texas so it's pretty bad with the whole right to work thing.

Bellexia, the larger cities in Texas, even when they don't have formal laws, often have multinational companies that tend to be very GLBT friendly. The company where I work is that way and is not unique in that regard. A large portion of the oil and gas companies in Houston, as well as the financial companies are like that.

And to Kieran, Drea makes a gigantically important point - recent research is showing that employers are less and less willing to consider someone the longer they have been out of work. So it becomes imperative to get back to work ASAP in any capacity and then use that as a springboard to move forward rather than waiting for the ideal job in the meanwhile.

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Guest Bellexia

That's all well and good but I swear everyone here lives in a bubble that thinks the employees are the company. Have you even worked? Have you even left the computer? Do you see the point I make in my post or does it just fly over? A "company" may have good standards, the employees working there may not. Thus if I go in dressed as amber, and my application says "bio name" then there will be some issues and it's easy to just say " you didn't meet our standards, buh bye, thanks for playing"

That said, it doesn't keep me from trying, I know things won't work out sometimes, I know that my gap in employment is gonna hurt but it's a catch 22. I can't get a job to fill that space if you won't hire me. I won't give up, that just makes it too easy.

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Guest LuceKeagan

If you have qualifications for a job at a Fortune 500 company or larger try there. Many companies have their own policies that protect us regardless of what state protections may or may not be in place. San Antonio isn't a bad place job wise either really. Austin is more friendly to people who don't fit into the little boxes people seem to think they should. Ft. Worth I'm not entirely sure about but I have heard of a few trans friends of mine who live there having problems with employment.

Try Walmart. I know they don't really care, stocking jobs especially. In fact they really don't care about much so long as you show up on time and can be helpful to customers (if seeking a customer service centric job position).

Don't forget to add volunteer work to your resume. Attatching resumes and cover letters to applications isn't expected but it can help give you an edge over others. The job market is saturated with people looking for work and its becoming very competitive.

Before my legal name change I always put my legal information down on my résumé and all applications, because to the legal and business world that is who you are. What is on your social security card is legally who you are and legality is really all they look for. Honestly I never brought the trans/gender issue up unless asked because professionally speaking it shouldn't matter and why make an issue of it before getting your foot in the door? When introducing myself I'd always ask to be called by my nickname/shortened version of my preferred name and make a light joke about my given name being used so little I had a hard time responding to it. Have a small laugh and carry on. Chances are being trans may not even be what's keeping them from hiring or calling back.

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Guest LizMarie

I apologize if I offended, Bellexia. In my experience, companies with serious GLBT policies simply do not tolerate that sort of thing. I realize there can be problem employees and things are never simple. The best we can hope for is to try to be accepted and if someone is a real problem, to hope that management and HR are serious about enforcing their policies.

Again, please forgive me. I did not mean to minimize what you are experiencing.

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Yes. I am in that scenario right now. I am too fem to pass male, and not enough legal fem to be fem. It's a awful awful situation. I feel helpless, and I live in Texas so it's pretty bad with the whole right to work thing.

Bellexia, the larger cities in Texas, even when they don't have formal laws, often have multinational companies that tend to be very GLBT friendly. The company where I work is that way and is not unique in that regard. A large portion of the oil and gas companies in Houston, as well as the financial companies are like that.

And to Kieran, Drea makes a gigantically important point - recent research is showing that employers are less and less willing to consider someone the longer they have been out of work. So it becomes imperative to get back to work ASAP in any capacity and then use that as a springboard to move forward rather than waiting for the ideal job in the meanwhile.

I have my "filler jobs" on my resume and application. I'm not looking for an ideal job. I'm looking to get hired by people where my being trans isn't a big deal, and where the pay is over minimum wage. I only had one job that's ever paid under $10 an hour, and that was in 2005, and I got a job paying $10/hour to start in 2006 with only a high school degree. $10 in 2006 money is roughly $11.50 today.

I also worked at an LGBT friendly company for a very short time, but the managers were not okay with trans people.

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Guest Bellexia

I apologize if I offended, Bellexia. In my experience, companies with serious GLBT policies simply do not tolerate that sort of thing. I realize there can be problem employees and things are never simple. The best we can hope for is to try to be accepted and if someone is a real problem, to hope that management and HR are serious about enforcing their policies.

Again, please forgive me. I did not mean to minimize what you are experiencing.

It's fine, I just came here to give a similar post, because that's what the OP was asking, I wasn't aware it was just a pity thread because I was called out in that "I don't know how it feels because my state offers protections" almost immediately upon making my post. I get it, it's frustrating and OP is not the only one going through this. I too would like some advice and honestly drea gave a wonderful post on it. Employment gaps maybe what is killing my resume, however there isn't much I can do in regards for that. So I just can't give up.

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Guest LuceKeagan

Oh I forgot to add trying for state based jobs also, ie at the court house in the file room and positions of that nature. Federal funded employers may be another place to look since they have more rules to play by if they want their money. State run mental hospitals (in the kitchens usually) are another place, public school kitchens (mom works for our local ISD and has met four trans ladies and one transman who are coworkers of her's), and basically anywhere else that may receive governmental funding. My dad's company for example has revised it's worker's handbook to reflect gender expression protection in the work place. It's a large company that receives both private and governmental funds. So companies are beginning to change some, slowly but at least they're starting.

Bellexia have you done anything in your unemployment time like helping a neighbor fix a fence? Helping parents or friends with something that would be considered laborious? Volunteer work? Even writing programs, making and maintaining websites for yourself and other things of that nature can be considered "work" experience and may help show prospective employers that you haven't been completely idle.

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Guest Bellexia

That's a good idea actually. Maybe I can get a dog walking thing going for a friend or something. Maybe that will help, I am honestly hoping for this taco bell thing to pull through. Fast food always has such a high turn over and they are always looking so maybe I will luck out ^_^

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Guest Bellexia

I might have gotten overly emotional. I do apologize, it is really frustrating looking for work and maybe I took it out on some people, I'm sorry. Guh :c

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Yes. I am in that scenario right now. I am too fem to pass male, and not enough legal fem to be fem. It's a awful awful situation. I feel helpless, and I live in Texas so it's pretty bad with the whole right to work thing.

I think Austin, and Fort Worth have protections based on gender identity. Where I am doesn't have that kind of protection.

In my experience legal protections are fairly irrelevant.

In theory they should help, but protections can make employer see a new hire as an legal risk and companies being risk adverse will weigh that negatively. So I find the "no legal protections" argument as not having much merit. Not having protections is more a perceived barrier thank real one.

As far as company policies, they either have a policy or not. Most companies do not. And policies in place likely will be beneficial.

Now I don't care if a company has a trans policy or not. As a new applicant, if obviously trans, you are going to be at a handicap.

As someone who looks at resumes, interviews, makes recommendations as to offering a position, the number one factor is how the applicant comes across in the interview as far as fit within the organization, expectations and attitude. Those things can overcome shortcomings in work history, shortcoming in skills and many issues.

Some things you mentioned, makes it sound like your resume looks spotty and for what it is worth, "self employed" is one of those things I see in a resume that can rise red flags since it is so often used to cover holes in employment record. I probe that with questions which can sort out those who really had their own company from those using it as a cover. I would respond positively to an entry that says "various contract/temporary positions" with some detail of the work done during that time.

I know it is tempting to try and blame things as the cause, but doing such only makes one helpless because there can't be a solution to self generated barriers.

If the legal name change really would make that much difference, just how much does a legal name change cost you? Is it $50, $500 or $5000? There are ways to get money.

And how do you get by with living expenses now?

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Guest Melissa~

I can only point out the normal stuff on employment. The better fit you are for a particular job the better you should be able to demonstrate that. As shown I obviously live in a state with no protections, and yes transitioning at work terrified me, but so far so good. I do know my employers HR and management spent an extensive amount of time with consultants and lawyers when my transition was made official. The only obvious outcome is I'm still here.

An employer that doesn't want you there will find a way to get you out, rules and regs might artificially tweak things for a time, but the outcome is the same. I have been fired from a previous job before, they will get you removed if they want you out. (No worries back then, the writing was on the wall and I had another job lined up.) Fighting the situation will not result in a good outcome. Even the use of settlements when wrong doing can be proven will likely prove toxic to long term success.

Lastly I would add, I am speculating about future employment changes. I will be changing regions. If it becomes clear that moving to a new life situation will happen, then I will start applying for jobs before the move with the explanation: available on date XX/XX/201X. I have job plans I'd love, like, tolerate, then deal with. Such as: the same or better job as I currently have, similar but less rank/pay, different industry temporarily-perhaps stocking a supermarket, crap job- such as contract delivery services or temp services, then the deal with it option- something I despise like OTR trucking(which would largely defeat the purpose of moving to a new region lifestyle change.)

The job market hasn't been easy for a good fifty years, the baby boomers had too much competitions from themselves, and ever since then the world market place has been squeezing the middle class, one must do what they can. Rules and regs won't save the day.

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Yes. I am in that scenario right now. I am too fem to pass male, and not enough legal fem to be fem. It's a awful awful situation. I feel helpless, and I live in Texas so it's pretty bad with the whole right to work thing.

I think Austin, and Fort Worth have protections based on gender identity. Where I am doesn't have that kind of protection.

In my experience legal protections are fairly irrelevant.

In theory they should help, but protections can make employer see a new hire as an legal risk and companies being risk adverse will weigh that negatively. So I find the "no legal protections" argument as not having much merit. Not having protections is more a perceived barrier thank real one.

As far as company policies, they either have a policy or not. Most companies do not. And policies in place likely will be beneficial.

Now I don't care if a company has a trans policy or not. As a new applicant, if obviously trans, you are going to be at a handicap.

As someone who looks at resumes, interviews, makes recommendations as to offering a position, the number one factor is how the applicant comes across in the interview as far as fit within the organization, expectations and attitude. Those things can overcome shortcomings in work history, shortcoming in skills and many issues.

Some things you mentioned, makes it sound like your resume looks spotty and for what it is worth, "self employed" is one of those things I see in a resume that can rise red flags since it is so often used to cover holes in employment record. I probe that with questions which can sort out those who really had their own company from those using it as a cover. I would respond positively to an entry that says "various contract/temporary positions" with some detail of the work done during that time.

I know it is tempting to try and blame things as the cause, but doing such only makes one helpless because there can't be a solution to self generated barriers.

If the legal name change really would make that much difference, just how much does a legal name change cost you? Is it $50, $500 or $5000? There are ways to get money.

And how do you get by with living expenses now?

I live with family which covers basic living expenses, but when I get a job I'll be expected to pay rent, gas, and some of the bills. A name change with a waiver is around $300. My bit of being self employed did include various tasks that I did while not having a legitimate job. There's also two businesses my parents have that I also write down, as well as things I've done with both. My resume is fine, I write cover letters for every potential employer that asks for a resume instead of just an application. As I said, I go to a job interview, perform my best, charm the hell out of people, and get a call back for a second interview. When it comes to saying "hey, legal info and info I gave you don't match because I haven't had my name changed" that's when the breaks are put on and everything comes to a screeching halt.

If it was my resume, why would they call me back for a second interview? If it was my resume, why would they say "Great, you just have to fill out paperwork, take a drug test, and you're set!" It's because it's not my resume. It's not my cover letter.

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You ever consider that blindsiding them with the other shoe is a problem in itself? I sure know it would raise questions about forthrightness.

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Guest LuceKeagan

Sounds like possibly a legality issue if you got as far as a drug test and they had to pay out the money for said testing. As I said before I always put my legal name down on anything that could be considered legally binding, such as a job application, when you fill out and sign a job application there is a little note there that usually reads something along the lines of "everything on this application is true to my knowledge". What they mean by "true" is the legal part. So if you show them one shoe, as Drea said, and then lob the other shoe at them when it comes to the actual hiring process where your legal name would be found out it could cause them to wonder what else may not be true.

$300 for a name change? After waiver? =/ Is this one you do on your own or with assistance from a company or lawyer?

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You ever consider that blindsiding them with the other shoe is a problem in itself? I sure know it would raise questions about forthrightness.

If you think saying that I'm trans and that my legal name is different from my chosen name, then when should I tell an employer and how should I go about it?

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Sounds like possibly a legality issue if you got as far as a drug test and they had to pay out the money for said testing. As I said before I always put my legal name down on anything that could be considered legally binding, such as a job application, when you fill out and sign a job application there is a little note there that usually reads something along the lines of "everything on this application is true to my knowledge". What they mean by "true" is the legal part. So if you show them one shoe, as Drea said, and then lob the other shoe at them when it comes to the actual hiring process where your legal name would be found out it could cause them to wonder what else may not be true.

$300 for a name change? After waiver? =/ Is this one you do on your own or with assistance from a company or lawyer?

I'm not paying for drug testing or anything. I could put only my first (legal) initial on job applications which wouldn't be "not true." But, let's say my legal name is Roxanne (it's not but let's assume it is), I fill out the job application with "Roxanne" but when they call to speak to "Roxanne" they get a person who sounds male. Let's go further and say that they want to meet "Roxanne." Show up to the interview with some facial hair (well groomed, not unruly), again the person they get is not the kind of person that would have that kind of name. And the name is associated with a gender, as well as certain pronouns that aren't me. So, all of the things leading up to the interview, and the interview itself make them shout in their heads before hiring "TRANS!" or some other slur.

A lot of the documents that are needed for a name change are documents I don't currently have (things like a birth certificate). Then I would also have to pay for replacements with my new name afterwards.

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      Welcome to WA! Seattle and the Capital Hill neighborhood in particular have many LGBTQ+ friendly establishments. Seattle Trans Pride 2024 is June 28th ;)  
    • missyjo
      Agree, April you always look so stylish  bravo dear   maddee, do you have furry friends too? aren't they adorable? they've generated a lot of smiles.   Ashley always looking cute   daisy print skirt with white floral blouse over pink lingerie. typing today n maybe movie tonight   hugs
    • Mmindy
      Good afternoon M.A.   Welcome to Transgender Pulse Forums, I think you'll find that there are a lot of us who had their first therapist reconsidering our story and recommended us to gender or LGBTQIA specific therapist. I made my first therapist cry after asking me what was my worst experience or memory. She was not prepared for the can of worms I brought to the couch. My second therapist is a gem, she's my age and knows how to work with my thoughts.    My two kids were also involved in the arts programs in school one in theater, the other combined art and modern music.   Best wishes, stay positive, and motivated,    Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋  
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Welcome.   This can be a good sounding board and a place to say things you otherwise could not. Be yourself. Find out what that is.   Abby
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I'm wearing a white t shirt and jeans.  The t-shirt is softer than a man's and slightly girly.  Feeling kinda pretty.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      That's very common in internet forums and it is hard not to take it personally sometimes.   You might post "bump" with a smiley face to bring it to the top of the stack, or you might use the @ feature if there are certain people you would really like to have comment on it, and say something like Dear Abby, I would really like your input on this.  Please take a minute and respond.  Thanks!!!
    • Mmindy
      The same for me... That's exactly were MmIndy came from. I started choosing female skins as soon as they became available in the few games I played.   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
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