Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Good morning All. Coffees on.


KymmieL

Recommended Posts

  • Forum Moderator

Oh - I used to drink coffee all day long and told my wife it was my last true vice. I now am holding myself to 1 cup in the morning - after a month it isn't so much a craving anything but now the feeling different sort of boost I expected. Oh well - it's probably better for me anyway - being ladies seem to enjoy tea more I think I will give that a try again although in the past it was never (excuse the pun) mt cup of tea.

Link to comment
  • Replies 23.3k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • Willow

    2034

  • KymmieL

    1651

  • Mmindy

    1374

  • Ivy

    1183

Top Posters In This Topic

Posted Images

18 hours ago, Emily michelle said:

So hopefully it goes well. I would say after tonight the cat will be out of the bag among the people we talk to on our county road 

I hope so too, Emily. That must be a huge challenge you are overcoming. You go, Grrl.

I'd love to read your post about how it went, if you care to share it.

It's probably belated, but here's a wish for the best of good luck with your neighbors, and the others on your country road.

~~A good luck hug and squeeze from Leah.~~

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

I have been coming out slowly and have not shared with neighbors as I live in a very right wing type area and I don't even dress too feminine because I know I would pay dearly... Good Luck today @Emily michelle

Link to comment

I had the get together with the neighbors last night. Not one person asked me what I was wearing or made any comments. My friend decided he is going to call me princess now lol. My deadname was used quite a bit and the wrong pronouns were used but I’m not going to complain because only 2 people there know everything about me. So I can’t expect them to know when I haven’t told them. So all in all I considered it a success we stayed out till 1 am this morning and had a blast 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

I did some purging yesterday. Getting rid of clothes that I will never wear or never fit me.

 

6 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

 Tomorrow will be retail therapy. lol

Hugs

Bri 

I can just see Bri running into the store waving a credit card yelling CHARGE IT!!

LOL

 

Kymmie

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator
59 minutes ago, KymmieL said:

Getting rid of clothes that I will never wear or never fit me.

Thats' a good idea.  No need to hold on to useless items.  

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

@Emily michelle glad it went well. You are a brave girl and you got through it with little collateral damage... Good news and glad you had a blast.

Link to comment

All this talk of purging made me realize I have a lot of clothes I haven't even though about wearing in well over a year.

Link to comment
9 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

Tomorrow will be retail therapy. lol

 Yep!  As they say...shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist ?

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator
19 hours ago, Astrid said:

 Yep!  As they say...shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist ?

That would really depend on were you shop. You can spend just about as much as you want on a beautiful dress. Not that I would. Maybe if I had it laying around. LOL

 

Second day of work, so my Tuesday. Tomorrow is our annual inventory, yah. Scheduled form 7:30 to 6. but I am supposed to help the inventory team. yah.

 

No coffee until later, and I am surviving. What is this madness. Still psyched about final a girl. Why can't name changes be that easy.

 

Kymmie

Link to comment
1 hour ago, KymmieL said:

Why can't name changes be that easy.

I know..right? Here it's $15 and a trip to the DMV to change a gender marker. Don't need a doctor to sign off either. Name change costs $500+, you still have to post you name and address in the paper and it takes 2-3 months.

 

Link to comment

Good afternoon everyone!

 

today hasn’t been a very good day I was pointed and starred at by 2 women when I was riding my bicycle earlier. Too top it off the pharmacy messed up my percription not giving me enough estrogen again. I finally broke down and cried when I made it to the car. My dysphoria for some reason been at like an all time high lately. I have been going to bed wishing I don’t wake up in the morning. I don’t have the guts to commit suicide but all this is gaining up on me telling me I don’t belong. I’m sorry for the rant I just had to get it off my chest.

 

By the way Elizabeth yor new pic is nice you look beautiful!

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

@Emily michelle I am so sorry to hear this.  Please try to shrug off the idiots, they mean nothing to you.  As to the pharmacy, check why you got less.  Was the scrip written that way, were they low on supply?   Please try to feel good about yourself.  You may be in the awkward phase of transition that seems to last way too long.  You certainly do belong!!  Never be sorry for a rant.  That's why we're here, to listen to and console each other as we need it.  Today is your day.  Take a deep breath and relax.  Tomorrow you can start anew.  

 

Hugs, Jani

Link to comment

Thanks Emily.

I agree with Jani, ignore the idiots.

My experience today. I went shopping for a few things and a new outfit after I purged a few bags of "other" clothes. Anyways, as I was wandering around looking for something to catch my eye. There were two younger women in the area. as soon as they saw me they started giggling to each other. I must have bumped into the 3 or 4 times in a matter of minutes. Every time they would turn, walk away and giggle. I'm assuming I got clocked. All I could do was stand up tall, pull my big girl panties up and continue my mission. But you never know what will happen next. The cashier was very nice, chatty and called me a young lady. I think we all have bad days.

Link to comment

@Emily michelle

    There is no excuse for the way these two people treated you. There are so many burdens we bare that other people will never understand. Remember who you are doing this for. This is about you. We are all here for each other and we have a strong community. Stronger than many truly realize. Our pain isn't just from our own experience in the moment but, it is also for everyone else that endures these attacks too. If you think about it, you handled the situation with far more grace and civility than either of the two people that attacked you. Do not disregard the real strength you have within your heart for the weaknesses others would project upon you. 

Link to comment

Usually I can handle being clocked because I don’t really pass yet but it is slowly getting there. For the most part I can laugh about it and move on. This past week has been horrible with my dysphoria I had 2 episodes I guess you would call it with other parts of my anatomy. That pretty much ripped the life out of me. The entire week I just felt like a fake. I can finally see the woman in me starting to show in other parts of me, and then I see my other part and I just feel like a chick with a “beep”. I don’t feel valid then add the being pointed at yesterday it tried to push me over the edge. I tried to talk to my wife about it but she doesn’t have to worry about these issues so it’s hard for her to understand.

Link to comment

I feel for you Emily. You are more of a woman then them. I have days where I don't feel valid from the moment I wake up and it only takes someone doing a double take to push me close to the edge. I am my own worst critic. Maybe it's time to change venues. I had to. I had to find different places to shop because I was to familiar at the others. After 10 years of seeing the other me they just don't see the real me no matter how much I've changed. As far as being a chick with a ...... I'm reminded every time I use the restroom, or shower, or change outfits. The only solution to that is GCS and that is way off over the horizon somewhere. For now I just want to live and try to have fun while the hormones do their thing. I always remember Kymmie's Signature line when things get rough.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

@Emily michelle you are brave and I think you are growing not only physically but mentally. You are definitely not fake.. You are they real deal and if other aren't willing to see that it is their problem. I and the ladies here certainly understand what you are going through. My personal journey feels like I will never pass but I am not going to stop trying and I am so glad you aren't either. Continue to be brave girl and you will make it.

Hugs

Shay

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Liz, that is why I put that in my signature.

 

The way I look at it. I have seen some woman that look more manly that some men I have seen. We've all seen those, ones that you could never imagine in something feminine, like a dress. While I don't know that they are CIS female. So what somebody saw you as different. Heck we are all different. We can't be 34-23-36(OK, its my goal, LOL) or go turn back the clock and look 16. Maybe 5% of the worlds woman are that good looking.

 

Kymmie

Link to comment

I have come to realize I am my own worst enemy and it’s all in my head. I’ve put myself down my entire life and I wish I didn’t but I don’t know how to stop. My fix for it was run away and hide it but it’s not healthy to be doing that. 
As far as the shopping goes I usually don’t get much looks occasionally. Most of the time the employees have been very nice and helpful. 
 

My anatomy bothers me everyday I just have to find a way to forget its there because unfortunately it’s there for a long time because I cannot afford the surgery or downtime in the near future. I just have to remember I am valid!

 

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Good morning everyone 

 

just finished my first cup.  My body is feeling a bit strained today.

 

sorry I’m a little behind on reading and responding.  We spent the entire day on our sailboat.  It was actually a very good day.  Left the house at 8am at got home at 8:30 pm.  Two meals and lots of water and some snacks.  I got my dinghy fixed finally and we took it with us.  Used it to go from the boat to an island and back.

 

@Shay I know what you mean, I desperately want to come out but all our friends and neighbors are very right wing.

 

@Emily Michele I understand what you are going through with the increased depression And dysphoria .  I’m glad to hear you don’t have the guts to do anything about it but please seek out someone for help.   I’ve been going through a spell of dysphoria pretty bad.  I even told my doctor essentially the same thing, what’s the point.  No one should treat us like that but some can’t help themselves.  They are the ones that should be ridiculed.

 

@KymmieL again congratulations on your recent accomplishments.  Sounds like you are making significant progress towards your goals.

 

well I suppose I should try to get something done today.  After all it’s another Monday Saturday.

 

Willow

Link to comment

@Emily michelle sorry to hear about all that.  I feel you.  I've been trying to turn my filter of other's reactions and stares from- look at that freak" to "Wow, check out that 6' redhead hottie".   It works for the casual stares but not so much for the occasional snicker I get.  

 

Link to comment

I need to reach out to a therapist again I had one for a while but my schedule was too crazy and money was tight because insurance hasn’t covered any therapy. Now I feel like I need it again I would like to find one in my network for insurance. I think maybe taking through it may alleviate some of the dysphoria.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

@Willow a friend I came out to advised me not to come out to a mutual friend that we've been friends with for 50+ years. I haven't been around him in recent years except when he had a stroke - I visited and tried to help. Well the friend I did come out to accepted me wholedhearted but said the other friend had turned wide right, conservative and voted for 45 so I ain't going there - thank you very much. I've already lost several friends because of what's in the Whitehouse. I don't want to get political - I hate that - so I won't mention I am 100% + against the regime in power, I'll leave it at that.

Link to comment
6 hours ago, Emily michelle said:

My anatomy bothers me everyday I just have to find a way to forget its there because unfortunately it’s there for a long time because I cannot afford the surgery or downtime in the near future.

 

I hear you!  I've found that there are subtle ways to help, such as wearing feminine items in a stealthy way.  One tip I received here at TransPulse was to wear an anklet under my socks.  A small thing, but every little expression helps -- and it did/has.  I actually can't wait for cooler weather here, because I can't wait to be wearing leggings under my pants when out and about.  They feel great. (And I tend to wear just the leggings around the house for even the shoulder seasons, simply because I find them wonderfully comfortable.)  

 

Astrid

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   2 Members, 0 Anonymous, 98 Guests (See full list)

    • Betty K
    • VickySGV
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      769.3k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,059
    • Most Online
      8,356

    FelixThePickleMan
    Newest Member
    FelixThePickleMan
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Aelia
      Aelia
      (22 years old)
    2. Just-Jenny-finally
      Just-Jenny-finally
      (65 years old)
    3. KelcieK
      KelcieK
      (50 years old)
    4. Krimson Kya
      Krimson Kya
      (35 years old)
    5. Robin
      Robin
      (56 years old)
  • Posts

    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Some of them are us.  I view while logged out sometimes.  But I also know that so much of this forum is public.  I really wish more areas were "members only."  I'm aware that stuff I post here is publicly viewable, so I never post last names, first names of other people, pictures, or give my location.  I tend to think my husband and GF would be displeased at the few things I do post here.... and they may be right.   Our times are pretty uncertain, and it seems to be "fox hunting season" out there. 
    • VickySGV
      Welcome to the Forums Felix, enjoy yourself, but please get the homework done!!
    • VickySGV
      On May 4, the Trans Chorus Of Los Angeles did a whole 90 minutes of music that was all written by Trans composers and all of our singers and musicians were Trans / NB.  Several of the pieces were actually written by our chorus members.  (I was running a $3,500 set of video cameras on the show and am editing the the massive gigabytes they put out today. We had several guest artists either on stage or who contributed material.  One of the artists was Wrabel who wrote the song The Village which he has dedicated to the Trans Community and describes a young Trans child and the problems they had in their village.  The other MAJOR Trans Artist was Jennifer Leitham, a Bass Viol and Bass Guitar player who as a young man played with the Big Bands of the 60's and 70's in her male self into Transition, and wrote an autobiographical song entitled Manhood which tells of her love of the men she played with in the bands but her not really fitting as a man. Jennifer has played with the Chorus before and is always good music fun to have around.  Two of our members collaborated on a music and poetry piece simply entitled "I'll - - " which brought some tears with a promise to Trans Young People with the whole chorus shouting "I'll be there for you, I will be there for you" said for Trans Kids.  (We actually had a few Trans kids in the audience to hear it.)  My video editing program has about 40 minutes to go producing the main body of the edited video which has the actual song clips in the right order.  Next to put in the Title slides and the credits.  The stuff I get myself into.   The concert took place at the Renberg Theater which is part of the Los Angeles LGB Center in Hollywood.   
    • FelixThePickleMan
      Hi, I'm Felix a little trans guy from a small town. My pronouns are he/they and I enjoy music and all wildlife, I doodle on all my homework assignments. I really don't know what to say but, my favourite animal is a cow, my favourite musical genre is country, I play electric bass & acoustic guitar as well as the ukulele a little bit of piano and drums (hand drums and drum sets). I like things of all sorts and I like food, a lot. My favourite meal is French fries and a good steak. My Personal Record for dead-lifting is 310 lbs and I like to sprint and play basketball. My mum's a "bit" overbearing but what can you do. I love reading Manga, I'm currently reading Assassination Classroom, I also enjoy reading Stephen King. I plan on joining the Marines after high school and become a k-9 handler.  I think that's all. For now :) 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      I didn't use makeup even in my girl form.  And certainly not now in my boy form.  I don't even like sunscreen...it just feels greasy.  I've always disliked putting stuff on myself.  Partly because of the physical feeling, and partly because I don't want to pretend to anybody.    My partners are mostly the same...makeup isn't really a thing for our faith.  But my GF and husband have one particular vanity - covering up gray hair.  IDK if I will feel differently when I start getting some of my own, eventually.
    • Jet McCartney
      I'm ftm but I still wear makeup on occasion to cover up my rosacea. Just primer and sunscreen usually. Sometimes I'll fill in my eyebrows too
    • DonkeySocks
      I think some of "them" are just us. If I log out, I might come in and putter around the forums for a minute before I commit to logging in and reading or participating. That probably shows as a guest visit.
    • DonkeySocks
      I have the Pierre by New York Toy Collective, I think I bought it from a different online store but it is that brand. The size recommendations will say that the four-inch shaft (the small Pierre) is for people 5' tall and under. I am 5'8" and it is fine for me. The larger (regular) Pierre shaft size is way too big to wear regularly, but it is a great packer to have around for gender affirming play at home. So even if you are taller than 5', if you aren't sure and you want something easy to wear, go with the small. It is a silicone packer.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Yes, resilient, for sure.  Ours were elementary/middle school age when their father died.  The girl took it really hard, losing her father.  My husband has been there as friend, counselor, and stepfather.  He was a dear friend of their father, and he has put in a lot of effort to raise them.  The eldest son is now his secretary, aide, and driver at work.   Since I'm young-ish and not their primary parent(s), I have the role of being an older friend to them.  They don't seem to have any issues with my gender.  I'm just Jen, and everybody knows that Jen is a little different.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      If you're looking for a millennial female who might be interested, maybe contact Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez? Y'all might have some things in common, and I think she and her partner are doing the "childless" thing.      Interesting that your wife did concrete work.  My GF spent some time laying concrete for her own projects....while 6 months pregnant.   She's a very stubborn girl.  Probably the exact opposite of the millennial female you're looking for, since she's a mother of 5 (and wished she could have more.)  Interesting how folks can have similar origins, but come to opposite conclusions.  My GF grew up in dire poverty, stealing to eat and take care of her little sister.  As a young adult, she spent several years living in a commune, and was a member of an armed communist political movement.  Now she's probably the most fervent anti-leftist, anti-government person you could ever find.  Experiences really shape who we are.    The lesson I draw from this is that globalism is not the right solution, and even the USA is too large a nation for everybody to agree.  Time to downsize voluntarily, before a civil war does it for us.  Some folks suggest that the USA could become between 4 and 7 different nations.  The way the world is going, I suspect you'll get your "depopulation" wish....but it will come about through war, plagues, and famine. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      I made apple pies, since we have apple trees here.  A classic, simple recipe, everything made from scratch.  We can make just about any kind of pie here - pecan, apple, pear, peach, blackberry....    I think the 6-burner stove came from an old diner.  So, technically a restaurant stove, just a small one.  It probably came from an auction, as my partner usually has an eye for deals.    This stove has 8 burners:   https://www.lowes.com/pd/FORNO-48-in-4-32-cu-ft-2-26-cu-ft-Steam-cleaning-Double-Oven-Convection-Gas-Range-Stainless-steel/1003096398?cm_mmc=shp-_-c-_-prd-_-app-_-ggl-_-PLA_APP_186_Cooking-_-1003096398-_-online-_-0-_-0&ds_rl=1286890&gad_source=1&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIj86BiPj3hQMVeTbUAR2m5wexEAQYASABEgI9tvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds   This one is the one I would love to have...it has 10:   https://www.lowes.com/pd/FORNO-Galiano-Gold-Professional-60-inch-Freestanding-Gas-Range/5013821825?cm_mmc=shp-_-c-_-prd-_-app-_-ggl-_-PLA_APP_186_Cooking-_-5013821825-_-online-_-0-_-0&ds_rl=1286890&gad_source=1&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIj86BiPj3hQMVeTbUAR2m5wexEAQYDSABEgIt__D_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds
    • missyjo
      69 years young dear  winks it's just a number..   transcend it n be fabulous  hugs
    • Lydia_R
    • Lydia_R
      Not to bump this up or anything, but I just want to put one more note on the end of this...   Thank you for allowing me to post this here and thank you for all who have responded.  This step has been a huge help to me on my political journey.  I've made several key decisions in the last few days that allow me to run a better campaign for the next 4 years.  I worked my way off of the streets 20 years ago by writing math and computer programming on paper.  10 years later I was able to buy a house with the software engineering work that I was doing.  Now 20 years after getting off of the streets and having two failed bids for US Representative and likely another failed bid in the next couple weeks, I've come to the point of selling my house to run a very frugal campaign for vice-president (it's a thing even though it is an appointed position) for the next 4 years, all on the money I have earned from that work I did on the streets.   My policy going forward is that I'm not going to ask for money and I'm not going to ask for people's votes.  The vice-presidency is an appointed position.  I'm also not going to run for legislative offices anymore.  I'm simply going to tour the country on my own dime looking for good people and a strong millennial female who sees my logic and would like to be president.   I have reached out to tens of thousands of people on my own dime in the last 7 years.  Famous people, ultra-famous people, business leaders, civil engineers, random people, news people, educators, unions, politicians.  I certainly got less than 5 emails from those efforts.  Actually, I only really remember one person.  He is an educator and we had a good Zoom meeting.   I'm not bitter.  I'm not complaining.  Those of you who have followed me on this site know I like to keep things positive and talk about cooking and living healthy.  I hope that this post doesn't get buried.  I think the title is strong and my message is clear.  I don't want to bog this site down with the details of the whole thing.  I simply want people to know that there is a transwoman working to be vice-president.  Notice that I didn't title this a-transwoman-as-us-respresentative.  My politics are executive level.  I'm a whistleblower, not a complainer.  I aim to educate and inspire.
    • MaryEllen
      Photos posted in the general forums are visible to anyone or anything. Photos in the gallery are visible only to members. non members cannot see them.
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...