Good morning All. Coffees on.

[Maddee]

11 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

Well after a horrible night last night I got up and even though I was still crying a little a pulled my -crap- together and made it to the Lesbian Meetup kayak trip.  I was really in my head the whole drive there and worried I would just break down again but it turned out I really needed this distraction. The 8 or so ladies all were really welcoming. I ended up in a double kayak because someone forgot to reserve theirs and the only thing left was a double so I volunteered to rent the double if someone wanted to share so that the single would be available for another person.  I ended up with a lovely kayak mate and we had a great time.  This was first foray out with a lesbian group and I really felt like I found a whole new set of friends today.  We even saw a bald eagle!  

Thanks for sharing this Bri.

 

Nice catch with eagle!

[Jackie C.]

12 hours ago, KymmieL said:

Gosh, I haven't been on a trip like that since I was 7 or 8. Sounds like you had lots of fun.You said It was a Lesbian meetup group. I need to find one of those. It looks like they are totally accepting of you. That is fantastic

 

Kymmie

 

I know, right? That sounds like GREAT fun.

 

Hugs!

[Heather Shay]

@Bri2020 sorry about your tears but love your smile in the photo and the eagle. You are incredably strong and you know it.

[Jamie68]

21 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

I was really in my head the whole drive there and worried I would just break down again but it turned out I really needed this distraction. The 8 or so ladies all were really welcoming. I ended up in a double kayak because someone forgot to reserve theirs and the only thing left was a double so I volunteered to rent the double if someone wanted to share so that the single would be available for another person.  I ended up with a lovely kayak mate and we had a great time.  This was first foray out with a lesbian group and I really felt like I found a whole new set of friends today.  We even saw a bald eagle!

Glad you're doing better. Looks like fun.

[Bri2020]

It's become abundantly clear over the last 2 months that I really need more frequent and quality therapy sessions.  The challenge is my therapist with Kaiser you basically had to book 2-3 months in advance so trying to add more times has been impossible.  I finally broke down and signed up for "Betterhelp" and online subscription based system where you pay $300/mo and get "matched" with a therapist you can meet virtually every week. They are real counselors/LCSW/LPC etc with at least 3 years experience.  I didn't have much in the way of expectations but I really need something so what the hell. It's easy to cancel and they have a 2 week trial.

Well, the 'matched" therapists have mostly been people who specialize in things like addiction, PTSD and other things that don't apply to me so I had to request to change twice. Finally, one came up that hit the mark and I scheduled an appointment with her for tomorrow.  You have to send a note about what's bringing you to the session.  an hour after it was confirm she cancelled the appointment and basically rejected my saying she doesn't specialize in "LGBT" issues and told me to find a different therapist. I messaged back that my "issues" didn't related to my trans status but more about grief, relationship changes, depression etc.  Crickets.......   The next person had nothing in common with the issues I was experiencing so asked them to rematch me.  Nothing......

So I cancelled my membership.

2 hours later I get a message from my Kaiser therapist saying he's leaving Sept 1st!  Luckily I have an appointment 2 days before that so he's going to write all my surgical letters but now I've been transfered to literally THE LAST Gender therapist with Kaiser in the mid Atlantic region. I'm never going to be able to get reasonable appointment times with this guy if he's doing the work of 3-4 therapists.  

A friend of mine is a psychologist and she is appalled at what's happening in her field. Everyone is quitting the insurance plans and going full on cash private practices.  It's creating a huge inequality issue for people needing mental health. Got lots of money- no problem, need to use insurance, good luck.  

I can't afford to see someone weekly for the $160/hr rate that they are charging around here yet I can't get care through my healthcare provider because no one wants to work for them anymore when they can make so much more and see fewer patients in their own private practice. They don't even need to advertise our "build" their practices. The demand is so high they just need to list themselves on google and their practice is full in a few weeks.

 

[KymmieL]

Holey crap, @Bri2020 talk about a bunch of BS you are having to go through. Wow. I would hook you up with my family therapist she only charges $100 per session and is LGBT friendly. Maybe you could see her as a out of network provider.  With so few providers you should be able to do out of network to see a provider.

 

I got my mammogram results from the VA today. Basically telling me what I already knew. Everything was fine. What got me was on the top of the letter where it had my full actual name and address Etc. Some one whited out my name and hand wrote. "Kymmie" over it. I love my GYN and her staff.

 

Kymmie

[Willow]

Evening report

 

Hi, We are in Portland.  You have to get tickets in advance to go to Multnoma Falls and DONT follow the directions.  Directions said to get off at this exit and take old Rt 30  Yeah, don't do that.  No parking.  If you stay on I84 is where you will find the larger parking lot.

 

Been a bit of a trying day.  I ran out of my antidepressant and couldn't get any until today in Portland  so that's the better part of a week eating away at me.  Today got the best of me.

 

Finding good therapists is difficult at best and worse when you have one you can see because they are over booked.  If you are willing to pay, try looking at psychology today website.  The website is free to use and could point you to someone you like.

 

Willow

 

[Aggie1]

@Bri2020This is making me nervous. I have an intake meeting with gender pathways with Kaiser in a week. So far everyone has been responsive to my messages. However this is “keep Portland weird” territory, so my mileage may vary. Kaiser has a 5-star rating in this area which allowed me to switch to them mid-cycle. Are there any other insurance plans in your state you could switch to before the end of the cycle that might serve you better?  
 

what with the delta variant and reimposed indoor masking mandates and elective surgery postponements and medical staff jumping ship it feels nerve wracking to say the least.

 

I guess just keep pushing buttons and ringing doorbells and maybe something will turn up?

[Bri2020]

4 hours ago, AgnesBardsie said:

@Bri2020This is making me nervous. I have an intake meeting with gender pathways with Kaiser in a week. So far everyone has been responsive to my messages. However this is “keep Portland weird” territory, so my mileage may vary. Kaiser has a 5-star rating in this area which allowed me to switch to them mid-cycle. Are there any other insurance plans in your state you could switch to before the end of the cycle that might serve you better?  
 

what with the delta variant and reimposed indoor masking mandates and elective surgery postponements and medical staff jumping ship it feels nerve wracking to say the least.

 

I guess just keep pushing buttons and ringing doorbells and maybe something will turn up?

No way I'm jumping ship now. I have all my approvals for surgeries and consults are set up.  For as challenging as the mental health aspect is, they are still the best Trans-care insurance/health plan.  Their transcare setup is so much farther along where you are then here.  The midAtlantic region is just getting their systems in place.  Basically they are trying to get a full team inhouse but right now most of the care besides mental health is contracted outside. A lot of what I'm asking from them or pushing them to do is groundbreaking over here. For instance, me and another person are the first ones they started covering electrolysis for but they didn't have systems and providers in place for the approval and care.  It took some work but now I get my approvals through in a day or two and reimbursed within 2 weeks.  They approved my large volume clearing for genital electrolysis (I have to travel to do it but....). After complaining, they did approve bottom surgery consult at the same time as FFS now. I expect the next person won't have to deal with that. (We'll see since I know a person who's about a year behind me).  The mental health thing is a problem everywhere, not just a Kaiser issue.  I may file a grievance and see if they will approve an out of network provider (assuming I can find one).

My emotional therapy support is probably going to have to be out of pocket at least short term.  I may slow down my electrolysis to help cover it. I pay $30 copays for each electrolysis so if I go every other week instead of 1-2 times a week I can use that $60-$90 to help cover a therapy session.  

[Elizabeth Star]

I was able to meet up with a new friend yesterday. We met a couple months ago in a facebook, trans group and were supposed to meet up for lunch last Sunday but things  happened. I was and wasn't upset the original plans fell trough since she lives 50 miles away in the city. As it turned out she had been spending a few days at her brother's house which is 20 minute from me and I pass twice a day going to and from work. Anyways, I stopped by on my way home and we chatted for few minutes. If I just met her on the street I would have assumed she was cis, It over-loaded my little brain a bit. Our first meeting was too short since I had to get home but I hope we'll be able to hang out again soon. I was really nice to, for once in my life, meet someone I actually have something in common with. It was brief first meeting but I'm hoping we'll do it again in the near future. Maybe sit and have that lunch next time.

[Bri2020]

1 hour ago, Elizabeth Star said:

I was really nice to, for once in my life, meet someone I actually have something in common with. It was brief first meeting but I'm hoping we'll do it again in the near future. Maybe sit and have that lunch next time.

Awesome!

[Jamie68]

2 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

No way I'm jumping ship now. I have all my approvals for surgeries and consults are set up.  For as challenging as the mental health aspect is, they are still the best Trans-care insurance/health plan.  Their transcare setup is so much farther along where you are then here.  The midAtlantic region is just getting their systems in place.  Basically they are trying to get a full team inhouse but right now most of the care besides mental health is contracted outside. A lot of what I'm asking from them or pushing them to do is groundbreaking over here. For instance, me and another person are the first ones they started covering electrolysis for but they didn't have systems and providers in place for the approval and care.  It took some work but now I get my approvals through in a day or two and reimbursed within 2 weeks.  They approved my large volume clearing for genital electrolysis (I have to travel to do it but....). After complaining, they did approve bottom surgery consult at the same time as FFS now. I expect the next person won't have to deal with that. (We'll see since I know a person who's about a year behind me).  The mental health thing is a problem everywhere, not just a Kaiser issue.  I may file a grievance and see if they will approve an out of network provider (assuming I can find one).

My emotional therapy support is probably going to have to be out of pocket at least short term.  I may slow down my electrolysis to help cover it. I pay $30 copays for each electrolysis so if I go every other week instead of 1-2 times a week I can use that $60-$90 to help cover a therapy session.  

How well do they cover bottom surgery? Humana choice covers 50%. Good thing I have a maximum out of pocket of $5,500.00

[Jamie68]

1 hour ago, Elizabeth Star said:

I was able to meet up with a new friend yesterday. We met a couple months ago in a facebook, trans group and were supposed to meet up for lunch last Sunday but things  happened. I was and wasn't upset the original plans fell trough since she lives 50 miles away in the city. As it turned out she had been spending a few days at her brother's house which is 20 minute from me and I pass twice a day going to and from work. Anyways, I stopped by on my way home and we chatted for few minutes. If I just met her on the street I would have assumed she was cis, It over-loaded my little brain a bit. Our first meeting was too short since I had to get home but I hope we'll be able to hang out again soon. I was really nice to, for once in my life, meet someone I actually have something in common with. It was brief first meeting but I'm hoping we'll do it again in the near future. Maybe sit and have that lunch next time.

That's awesome. I think at this point, my wife would have a royal breakdown. Someday I hope I can actually meet someone and chat.

[Maddee]

@Elizabeth Star
 Wondering what nearly overloaded your mind.  That she passed well as cis?

Meeting new people sounds cool. Almost enough to get me back to FB.  it's been 7 years.  Gonna wait until after my surgeries I think.  It's hard for me to connect with anyone.

 

Today I'm off...have bottom hair clearing appt later.  Thinking towards clearing entire body...

Peace

[Jackie C.]

3 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

I was able to meet up with a new friend yesterday.

 

That DOES sound nice. I need to spend more time chatting with friends.

 

I wish I could help @Bri2020. I reached out to my therapist (she does telehealth), but she's only licensed in Michigan. Apparently out-of-state is more paperwork. Her referral rate was only $60 a session though. I wish I could be there for you to lean on. ?

 

Hugs!

[Heather Shay]

I did not find a therapist who accepts Medicare but found an amazing therapist near me so I space my sessions and cut corners elsewhere to cover cost and found old comic books and albums to sell and the money from eBay pays for therapy and electrolysis. It's worth it to have therapist. For me it's the most important so hopefully you can find someone. I'm glad Kaiser is covering all that stuff for you. I found surgeon who takes Medicare because I could never sell enough comics or albums to cover that.

Hugs

Heather

[Ivy]

3 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

I was really nice to, for once in my life, meet someone I actually have something in common with.

I have only been able to to this once, but it was awesome.

[Maddee]

At least in some states, counselors with a masters in social work can accept Medicare.

[Aggie1]

5 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

Their transcare setup is so much farther along where you are then here.

Cool! I’m relieved to hear that. I’m paying $100 per week out of pocket for electrolysis so looking forward to my visit with the gender pathways folks in a week to maybe get some relief for that. I don’t know what the therapist situation is out here but if they have any slack I wonder if they could accommodate out of state patients over zoom? 

[Aggie1]

5 hours ago, Elizabeth Star said:

I was really nice to, for once in my life, meet someone I actually have something in common with.

? 

[Bri2020]

2 hours ago, AgnesBardsie said:

Cool! I’m relieved to hear that. I’m paying $100 per week out of pocket for electrolysis so looking forward to my visit with the gender pathways folks in a week to maybe get some relief for that. I don’t know what the therapist situation is out here but if they have any slack I wonder if they could accommodate out of state patients over zoom? 

Even with virtual care, the provider must be licensed in the state that you are calling in from so this limits people to a fairly small window geographically. 

Electrolysis may or may not be covered for you, it depends on the plan by Kaiser that you have. If it's corporate sponsored it depends on whether your employer has "full coverage" or not. Same with FFS.  If it's a plan gotten through the AMA /obama care then it probably doesn't cover electro. Same with medicare/medicaid plans. Basically if a government is subsidizing it, don't plan on getting it. If you pay for your plan yourself then it's definitely covered. We're self employed so we pay through the nose but at least we get everything.

[Aggie1]

1 hour ago, Bri2020 said:

Even with virtual care, the provider must be licensed in the state that you are calling in from so this limits people to a fairly small window geographically. 

Electrolysis may or may not be covered for you, it depends on the plan by Kaiser that you have. If it's corporate sponsored it depends on whether your employer has "full coverage" or not. Same with FFS.  If it's a plan gotten through the AMA /obama care then it probably doesn't cover electro. Same with medicare/medicaid plans. Basically if a government is subsidizing it, don't plan on getting it. If you pay for your plan yourself then it's definitely covered. We're self employed so we pay through the nose but at least we get everything.

It’s Medicare so SOL right?! 

[Davie]

Good to hear everyone's experience with therapy, good and bad. I have to feel grateful for mine, I'd say. Though I'm not sure how it helps exactly with gender issues. I had my second episode with a gender therapist but it didn't seem very special that way—and it was not my old therapist who I said goodbye to last week. She was super, but not "trained" in gender issues. At least mine is covered by my insurance. I have Commonwealth Care Associates (CCA) which is fully accepted by Fenway Health. It's covered for twelve sessions, each week or twice a month and flexible. I heard she works through an agency of some kind and then through Fenway. She's young and enthusiastic so that's good. I have spent two weeks now just filling her in on my life and past and trying to get help with all my personal changes. My head spins, but hers doesn't seem to so far. This country needs a whole new healthcare system: single payer, everyone covered. Move the insurance companies to Antarctica, please. Anyway. So far, so good. One Day at a Time.

Wish you all the peace and freedom you deserve.

Hugs,

Davie 

 

[Elizabeth Star]

5 hours ago, Maddee said:

 

@Elizabeth Star
 Wondering what nearly overloaded your mind.  That she passed well as cis?

 

From the moment she said hi I couldn't believe I was speaking to another trans woman.  It also didn’t help that she's in her late 20s and has a daughter. When I was at that age I was stil living on the streets and couldn't even think about my future let alone having a family or starting transition. Regardless I had a good time and look forward to seeing her again.

 

It's also not helping the whole situation that this is the week I feel overly-emotional about everything. 

 

[KymmieL]

From what I have read that most of the famous Trans actors and models came out as trans after they were discovered and made it big.

 

Kymmie