Good morning All. Coffees on.

[Zelaire]

I'll jump in on a couple band-wagons: I also have enjoyed a number of Dr. Z's videos and found them really helpful. I suppose her accent is part of the charm. I tend to watch longer videos at a higher speed in general, so although I think I know what you mean by her talking in circles, those circles go by faster at 1.5X playback, so maybe it doesn't bother me as much. 😄 @Willow and others here, are there other YouTube channels or bloggers you've found helpful at various stages and would recommend?

Also, re: Starbucks, I'm in the same geographic region as @Ticket For Epic--which I agree, @Teri Anne, shouldn't be a factor in quality of service--but I've never really had a rock bottom experience at a Starbucks. Expensive, yes, but most of the folks I've encountered even at turnpike rest stop branches seem more upbeat than the average fast-food-anything establishment. So maybe it really is a geography thing for some odd reason? "Coffee culture" may be different in different parts of the U.S.?

[NashySlashy]

Good morning everyone!

 

Husband and I worked out our drama from this weekend. My issue with him now is that he doesn't want to talk about anything bothering him. And, knowing him, this is usually how he starts freaking out over everything. I talk about my problems all the time, but he doesn't want to do the same. It makes me feel bad about even bringing up my issues.

 

Oh well. I can't force him to talk. I just need to give him time. Hopefully he feels safe enough to come forward, eventually.

[Willow]

Good morning 

 

What no early birds?  I guess you gotta know it’s Monday.

 

Today is brought to me by “Morning Joe”, another of the many Starbucks variations.  
 

I was talking to a friend on FB Messenger.  Based on a FB post I realized she was also taking injectable E.  I asked where she was getting it.  I now know that I need to switch pharmacies at least for this one.  I’m going to try today and see what they say.  I was beginning to think I was (we all are) being discriminated against when it came to HRT.

 

We got a fair amount of setup done yesterday.  Got the tv mounted on the wall.  Made cabinet tops for some of the kitchen cabinets.  My wife likes to display things on top and these ha a decretive molding which sticks up above the top so a need to fill that in so she can set things on them without the bottom several inches being hidden.  I am switching my power tools to all yellow and black battery powered.  My latest was a 4 ½ circular saw. Surprised at how well it cuts and how quickly.  I do need to get used to it as it’s not conventional skill saw styling.  But I will say, even though there are less expensive battery powered tools, you get what you pay for and I don’t think you can beat the yellow and black brand.

 

I still have more to cover but they will be done today or tomorrow.

 

I see someone else has gotten on here.  Good morning NashySlashy.

 

Hugs

 

Willow

 

 

[Willow]

@NashySlashy I can understand a bit about your husband.  I always calmed up when my wife would start a discussion that was perhaps an argument.  Then after therapy I learned to speak up.  But I find my self reverting back to silence again.  I know she doesn’t like that I am a transgender woman.  It’s difficult for her to accept and the thought that someone would think of her as a lesbian really upsets her.  She went into a tirade the other day and even though I was upset, I just listened and let her blow off.

 

obviously I don’t know your dynamic but perhaps he needs to figure things out?

 

Willow

[NashySlashy]

4 minutes ago, Willow said:

@NashySlashy I can understand a bit about your husband.  I always calmed up when my wife would start a discussion that was perhaps an argument.  Then after therapy I learned to speak up.  But I find my self reverting back to silence again.  I know she doesn’t like that I am a transgender woman.  It’s difficult for her to accept and the thought that someone would think of her as a lesbian really upsets her.  She went into a tirade the other day and even though I was upset, I just listened and let her blow off.

 

obviously I don’t know your dynamic but perhaps he needs to figure things out?

 

Willow

 

He and I are in therapy together, thankfully. His refusal to speak up has been brought up before, and he justified it as not liking to share things. Our therapist has encouraged him to try expressing himself more often so it doesn't turn into him lashing out and throwing tantrums. He's...a stubborn guy. He's still trying to figure out sharing.

 

I'll give him all the time he needs. I just worry about him.

[KymmieL]

23 hours ago, Willow said:

@KymmieL if you have a bikini and want to wear it there is no rule against it. Just keep in mind that  a lot of units look at the pool and there are kids here in the summertime.  Modestly would be appreciated.

Anymore all of mine are modest. If they want to see more. (Why would they🤢) they can use their imagination. 😝

 

Well had ice cream with our oldest and family and in-laws. It was great seeing my other set of grandkids. My granddaughter is so adorable.  All though she needs to get out of diapers. At almost 4 she needs to. Heck her 2 yrs old cousin is almost out. OH, well that is my son and DIL's problem. 

 

Well work day shift today. then close Tues, Weds then the weekend.

 

Hugs,

 

Kymmie

 

YEAH, my 2000th post.🎇

[Bri2020]

20 hours ago, Heather Nicole said:

The heavy-ish accent doesn't make things easier, either.

I can't help but seeing and hearing Edna from the Incredibles when I watch her vids. lol 

[Ticket For Epic]

Morning all! 

 

How am I 42 and haven't the foggiest idea how to make friends?   I moved back to this area over 3 years ago and have met and gotten to know no one.   I work alone, I live alone have no hobbies or extra curricular interests that take me out of the house. 

 

  I've always been this way but it was never an issue because I've always had a significant other and they fulfilled all of my social needs.   My marriage ended 4 years ago and she was my entire social circle.  

 

I honestly don't know why I shared this here, other than I haven't anyone to share things with.

 

much luv

[Heather Nicole]

2 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

I can't help but seeing and hearing Edna from the Incredibles when I watch her vids. lol 

 

Oh definitely! There was one video where she even briefly commented on that. Wish I could remember which video and what it was she said. I think it was a relatively recent one.

 

I keep noticing too, she seems to really like accessories that are really large! I like her personality, definitely colorful.

 

1 hour ago, Ticket For Epic said:

How am I 42 and haven't the foggiest idea how to make friends?

 

You too?

 

Most of the friends I ever had were highly social people (or at least outgoing) who knew how to make a friend of just about anyone (even me!) But with time and physical distance we all wound up drifting apart. Not as easy to find connections once you're out of school.

[Marcie Jensen]

2 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

I can't help but seeing and hearing Edna from the Incredibles when I watch her vids. lol 

Dear Lord! Me too. I thought I was the only one who heard Edna. 

[rachel w]

2 hours ago, Ticket For Epic said:

Morning all! 

 

How am I 42 and haven't the foggiest idea how to make friends?   I moved back to this area over 3 years ago and have met and gotten to know no one.   I work alone, I live alone have no hobbies or extra curricular interests that take me out of the house. 

 

  I've always been this way but it was never an issue because I've always had a significant other and they fulfilled all of my social needs.   My marriage ended 4 years ago and she was my entire social circle.  

 

I honestly don't know why I shared this here, other than I haven't anyone to share things with.

 

much luv

Hello Ticket For Epic       I will be 63 next month and i have a few friends but no one that i really chat with on a every day thing. so i hear what you are talking about. 

[KathyLauren]

3 hours ago, Ticket For Epic said:

How am I 42 and haven't the foggiest idea how to make friends? 

...

I work alone, I live alone have no hobbies or extra curricular interests that take me out of the house.

Those two statements are related.  To make friends, you have to meet people, and to meet people, you have to get out of the house.

 

I am like you.  I don't make friends easily, and I have never had close friends.  But I tried to get out of the house doing things.  Concert band, Scottish country dance group, community theatre, were all good, prior to covid.  All three have started up again, but only the theatre is safe enough for my liking.  So that's what I am doing.

 

Find something to do that will get you out of the house.  You don't have to be good at it: learning a new skill is a great way to meet people.

 

[Ivy]

3 hours ago, Ticket For Epic said:

I've always been this way but it was never an issue because I've always had a significant other and they fulfilled all of my social needs.   My marriage ended 4 years ago and she was my entire social circle.  

Oh.  I'm very much in the same situation.  (except a bit older)

 It's been about 5yrs for my marriage tanking.  I've actually lived around here for most of the last 50+ yrs though.  But my marriage was pretty much my life.  I still have my grown kids, but they are all out of town now with families for the most part.

Most people knew me as that weird guy in my past life.  The people I'm around these days are almost all younger folks.  The town isn't all that big, and if there are any trans folx, I haven't met them.

It gets lonely, yup.

[Ivy]

26 minutes ago, KathyLauren said:

Find something to do that will get you out of the house. 

Yeah this.   I do try to get out at least once a week.  There is a deli with craft beer here.  I'll go there on Saturdays and just hang out and watch the people.  I've also started joining the protests over Roe at the court square on Sundays.  These people are pretty accepting.  

[Ticket For Epic]

2 hours ago, KathyLauren said:

Those two statements are related.  To make friends, you have to meet people, and to meet people, you have to get out of the house.

Very true!  My near crippling anxiety makes that difficult.   I get up a 6am to be at work for 11:30 because that's how long it takes for me to work up the nerve to leave the house AND I WORK ALONE!

 

I have joined a trans support group but haven't any idea how to make connections or even strike up a conversation.  Oddly, I'm amazing with perfect strangers I know I will never meet again.  Generally, I sit sit on the sidelines and pray someone will come say hello while simultaneously dreading it.

 

I'm a text only kind of gal, phones are terrifying, so that doesn't help.  Hell, I have a mini panic attacks when I see that I've been mentioned or quoted here.

 

Bottom line, I think I need professional help but don't have the means to make it happen.  Shirt is expensive!

 

2 hours ago, Jandi said:

It gets lonely, yup.

That it does.  It's a new experience for me, don't much care for it. Lol 

 

I'm glad you seem to have found some form community even if it isn't ideal.

 

3 hours ago, rachel w said:

       I will be 63 next month and i have a few friends but no one that i really chat with on a every day thing. so i hear what you are talking about. 

Yeah, seems to be a trend in the community.  That's part of the reason I'm scared to leave the prison we call "the closet ". 

 

Jammidodger (YouTube)  hit the nail on the head a couple weeks ago...  what's the worst part about being trans?...  transphobia.

[Jackie C.]

2 hours ago, Ticket For Epic said:

Jammidodger (YouTube)  hit the nail on the head a couple weeks ago...  what's the worst part about being trans?...  transphobia.

 

Well sure, but Jamie lives on TERF Island. I've run into exactly two people who care that I'm trans. I'm blood related to one of them and the other is just a butt. A lot of transphobia seems to boil down to where you live.

 

I am a tremendous introvert, but I can fake social skills for about six hours at a stretch. Slightly longer if I'm talking to geeks or lesbians. Since I've come out, I've joined several queer social groups, met a ton of lovely people, gotten my personal training license, violently changed career paths and taken up dance.

I'm also active at the local game store and have a weekly D&D game.

 

Every one of those activities has yielded friendships. Some are closer than others and I'm still looking for that BFF, but getting out there and meeting people isn't all that hard where I'm at. If your local scene isn't all that, I can recommend My Feminine Heart. It's mostly older trans women (I'm a member), but they have zoom meetings several times a week on a bunch of topics. The organizer is good people.

 

Hugs!

[WillowA113]

5 hours ago, Ticket For Epic said:

Very true!  My near crippling anxiety makes that difficult.   I get up a 6am to be at work for 11:30 because that's how long it takes for me to work up the nerve to leave the house AND I WORK ALONE!

 

I have joined a trans support group but haven't any idea how to make connections or even strike up a conversation.  Oddly, I'm amazing with perfect strangers I know I will never meet again.  Generally, I sit sit on the sidelines and pray someone will come say hello while simultaneously dreading it.

 

I'm a text only kind of gal, phones are terrifying, so that doesn't help.  Hell, I have a mini panic attacks when I see that I've been mentioned or quoted here.

 

Bottom line, I think I need professional help but don't have the means to make it happen.  Shirt is expensive!

 

That it does.  It's a new experience for me, don't much care for it. Lol 

 

I'm glad you seem to have found some form community even if it isn't ideal.

 

Yeah, seems to be a trend in the community.  That's part of the reason I'm scared to leave the prison we call "the closet ". 

 

Jammidodger (YouTube)  hit the nail on the head a couple weeks ago...  what's the worst part about being trans?...  transphobia.

I have a hard time working up the courage to leave my bedroom after I wake up 

Haha I get nervous when someone doesn’t respond to me too. I have to fight the urge not to repeat myself. 
I love Jammidoger! And it only seems like he live on “terf island” because part of his job is to react to transphobia. And I, too am an introvert with the ability to fake social skills. And I agree geeks and lesbians are some of the easiest people to talk a long time to. Of course, im extremely extroverted online! @Jackie C.

[MirandaB]

My electrologist had a zoom seminar with Dr Z, lesson on dealing with people like us, I told her to say hi from me.  

[KymmieL]

As I have said before. I don't have any friends, but my wife. Yet, I cannot talk about transgender things with her. I thought I had so best friends. Yet, I barely hear anything form either of them. One I came out to. Now that friendship is about all but gone. 

 

My therapist says I am a funny, caring, and sensitive woman. Nobody seems to want to be around me to learn that.

4 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

 I'm still looking for that BFF

Jackie, I'll be your BFF. LOL.

 

Kymmie

[Willow]

Good morning, bad night!

 

Yes, I was up again last night, couldn’t sleep.  Now I can’t wake up.

 

Congratulations @KymmieL on your 2000.  I’m a bit behind you but I’m moving along.  There was a time when I didn’t think I’d ever go over 500.

 

@Ticket For Epic I know what you mean.  I never had friends until we moved to SC.  Don’t wait until you are old and retired, it’s obvious I missed a lot.  Start with the neighbors or a group where you can feel safe.  Once you’ve made the first couple of friends, it starts getting easier.  My wife was always the one that had friends, me not so much.  Our rolls have somewhat reversed.  But since we moved into our condominium we are both meeting new people.  Going to sponsored events, ice cream social, cornhole and cookout, our just going to the pool.  It’s all working for both of us.

 

this has been brought to you by Morning Joe.  Get yours today at your local grocery store.

 

ah, maybe some breakfast will help wake me up.  Too hot to do anything more than walking the dog outside.

 

until next time

 

Willow

 

 

[Willow]

Hi. 
 

let’s see, the replacement cabinets are sitting in our living room.  Next we need the granite guy to remove the countertop so the old cabinets can be removed.  Once the cabinets have been removed the drywall people have to remove the drywall and not just in the kitchen.  The wall has to be treated with an anti mold and mildew spray.  Then everything has to be put back, painted and we can begin to put the kitchen back, the pantry and the bedroom closet. Doesn’t sound like a quick process to me. 
 

I made a batch of chocolate chip cookies this afternoon,  and like Frank Sinatra said, I did it my way.  Large cookies with chocolate chips and walnuts!  I’m the only one who will eat them.  I like all tree nuts.  Next time maybe I’ll use pecans or hazelnuts.

 

Went to the pool for about a half hour.

 

dinner next then dog walk.

 

Willow

 

[Ivy]

56 minutes ago, Willow said:

I made a batch of chocolate chip cookies this afternoon

Aaah tasty.

[Elizabeth Star]

I missed so much over the last few days.

 

On Monday I got a call from my surgeon's office. My top surgery is scheduled for August 30th. I really thought it was going to be a lot further out considering I was told it would be 6-12 months, two months ago. At work I followed proper procedure for scheduling the time off but my supervisor decided to step over the line. First he asked me if it was for "the surgery". I told him it could be but I'm telling anyone. The he had the nerve to tell me to make sure no one is on vacation that week and that I better make sure I have PTO left and then something about this just being a choice I made.  Like this is optional or something. I'm going to pay a visit to HR at lunch today, this stops now.

 

 

[Ivy]

1 hour ago, Elizabeth Star said:

I'm going to pay a visit to HR at lunch today

Sounds like it is warranted.

[NashySlashy]

Good morning all!

 

Had to endure sweltering summer heat for about an hour at the office, as last night's storm caused damage to the A/C. It's been fixed now, and it's only a matter of time before I bundle up in my blanket lol. If it's not scorching heat, it's artic cold.

 

1 hour ago, Elizabeth Star said:

On Monday I got a call from my surgeon's office. My top surgery is scheduled for August 30th. I really thought it was going to be a lot further out considering I was told it would be 6-12 months, two months ago.

 

That's great, Elizabeth! I know you must be super stoked for this, and rightfully so! Hope the surgery goes well!