Good morning All. Coffees on.

[Mmindy]

On 2/9/2023 at 12:24 PM, Hannah Renee said:

DO KNOW HARM - DO NO HARM.

Hannah, the heart longs for the love of others, even after they've passed, and we thought we had grieved enough. Hugs.

 

On 2/9/2023 at 3:02 PM, Jamie68 said:

Just checking in with an update. Surgery went awesome. (Zero depth vaginoplasty). Took 6 hours. They were amazed that I didn't need any pain meds during recovery. Healing quickly. Rush University is a great place.

Jamie68, thanks for checking in, and I'm so happy for you and your results. Hugs.

 

10 hours ago, Ivy said:

That is one thing about being retired.  It kinda takes some getting used to.  "3 Day Weekends" mean nothing to me anymore.

I have my phone set up to remind me when to change my titty tape.  I would forget otherwise

@Willow, and @Ivy, retirement is a good thing. I'm still in a semi-retirement situation. I no longer have a busy travel schedule, but I am building training equipment in my small shop. Like you I still need to set reminders on my phone so that I don't forget them. Hugs for you both.

 

19 hours ago, KymmieL said:

My GYN had me get one. Almost to show that even trans woman need one. clean and green.

Glean & Green as a PSA for all women including trans-women that you need to have a Mammogram.

Hugs,

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

[Mmindy]

@Jackie C. Hugs, and thank you for the update on @Bri2020. Like you I think @Elizabeth Star is just to busy with her life, and I'm happy for her.

 

Good morning everyone,

 

I was up early making physical visits to a couple of manufacturing vendors with Coffee on the run.

I have a few follow up emails to make, then I'm on vacation heading out tomorrow showing the wife, what the historical south.

 

Best wishes, stay positive, and motivated.

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

[Jackie C.]

1 minute ago, Mmindy said:

@Jackie C. Hugs, and thank you for the update on @Bri2020. Like you I think @Elizabeth Star is just to busy with her life, and I'm happy for her.

 

I feel that. My life has kind of taken off and I'm a BUSY little thing so I'm not on as long as I used to be, but I still try and make time to check in a couple of times a day.

 

Hugs!

[Willow]

Hi again,

 

We have mentioned several tests recently that we “need”.   We are told that because we take female hormones we need to check for breast cancer and get mammograms.  I’m good with that.  Breast cancer doesn’t follow my family, however, some cancer does and sometimes you develop cancer as a reaction to medication as I did or as a result of the application of simple things like antiperspirant and even talcum powder.  
 

As for a PSA test, absolutely a big yes from me, but there is an end point.  If you get rid of the old walnuts, there is nothing making T.  Add to that a dose of E which is often used to slow or stop the prostate cancer and needing a PSA goes away.  
 

But here’s one no one told you about, a CA125.  This is just another marker that can be used to identify a cancer, very similar to a PSA in that regard.  And clearly your pcp or even your gynecologist if you have one will say, you don’t need that.  Why not?  Because they only use it for cis women with a family history of ovarian cancer.  But it also detects other abdominal cancers such as  paratinial cancer.  That is a cancer men or women can get. It’s the membrane that holds your intestines etal in place.  If you get that, you won’t know until it’s too late.  So consider getting that checked especially if you are on female hormones and are post surgery.  
 

So, just take care of yourself and have the best life you can

 

Willow

[Mmindy]

Good afternoon everyone,

 

@WillowThank you for updating the types of cancer tests we should be looking for.

In my reply to @KymmieL I used PSA as a short for Public Safety Announcement, not even thinking about the PSA that folk should have completed. On my Twitter account I'm constantly looking up modern abbreviations. W = wining, FTK = for the kill, T4T = Trans for Trans support or relationship. These keep my google busy.

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

[Willow]

@Mmindy I admit I am not up on modern lingo and don’t even think about it most of the time.  I knew Prostate Antigen didn’t exactly fit what you were saying but to me that was what a PSA test means so oops, my bad.  My sister knew that ovarian cancer ran in my mothers side show she always got one. The very unexpectedly one year her test number jumped up.  Must be a mistake, retook the test two weeks later, even higher 6 weeks later they went in through her belly button and discovered not only ovarian but paratenial cancer and that was the real problem.

 

it can’t be surgically treated, it can’t be treated by radiation, and chemotherapy has limited success.  Because they found it early she was able to fight it for several years, but in the end, the chemotherapy killed her.  Paratenial cancer is hundreds of rice sized tumors.

 

She suggested I should also get tested.  I got a baseline so I know what would be elevated, but then thought, if it can’t be cured, do I really want to know I have it.  I still don’t have a good answer.

[Ivy]

4 hours ago, Willow said:

if it can’t be cured, do I really want to know I have it.

Yeah.  We have some DNA stuff in my family for ALS.  I lost a  cousin, brother, and sister to it.  Has it been passed on?  I don't know.  I have 8 kids.  Should they get tested?  It's up to them.  I don't plan on getting tested, what's the point?

For myself, I was the oldest sibling.  I'm the only one still living.  Going by my father and grandfather, I fully expected to be dead 3 years ago.  But here I am.  I didn't have any plans to live this long.  I don't know what to do.  It's messing with my head, to be honest.

I wonder, will I be deadnamed when I'm gone?

Life is so weird sometimes.

[Mmindy]

Good morning everyone,

 

The trip South to New Orleans, LA starts today. We just have to pack and toss the suitcases in the Explorer and go. This will be the last home brewed coffee, until we return in a week.

 

Indy to Birmingham, AL today.

Birmingham, Al to Laurel, MS on Sunday. Going to see the HGTV Hometown Shop and houses.

Laurel, MS to New Orleans, LA on Monday. Three days in and around historical sites.

New Orleans, LA to Vicksburg, MS Thursday to see Civil War sites.

Vicksburg, MS to Nashville, TN for the Grand Ole Opry Saturday Night.

Nashville, TN back home in Indy on Sunday.

Coffee reports in the AM daily.

 

Hugs,

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

 

[Marcie Jensen]

@Mmindy, Sounds like a fun trip. Be safe in the road. 

 

If you haven't been before, I think you'll enjoy the Vicksburg Civil War sites. It's been a while since I was here, but if memory serves, there is a partial reconstruction of a Union ironclad on display that is amazing.

 

And the stop at Laurel sounds like fun.

 

Enjoy!

[Willow]

Good morning 

 

saw this one and felt it was good for everyone here.

 

[Cyndee]

@Willow 🙂🙂

[Willow]

Well it rained all night.  Hard at times, but it’s not raining right now.  I woke up to being the filling I. A sandwich I was in the middle of the bed and our dog had decided to lay beside me on my pillow.  I had no idea she was there until I woke up.  Even 60 pound dogs can be gentle and like softness.

 

I had a great time at strength and stretch Friday.  I was enjoying the music and putting some extra into it.  Play a joke on the leader.  And got told by two women the wig I was wearing looked good on me.  We use 6” air filled balls for some of the workout. We were early to class so another woman and I got her equipment for her.  I went to get her a ball and thought it was stuck.  Turns out it was the one ball filled with shot.  Half way through the class we grabbed the balls and she was like oh, you got me the weighted ball.  But she used it.  After class we talked and she said I was putting some extra into it.

 

except we are going to miss a few days to doctors, I do intend to go to her aqua fitness starting next week.

 

Willow

[Ivy]

30 minutes ago, Hannah Renee said:

I've never had plans or desires to live beyond a certain point.

Of course I never expected to realize I was transgender either.  It's kinda like I really didn't expect to be where I am these days. 

On the other hand, it's kinda like starting a new life.  I'm trying to make a new life that I never planned on.  I mean, I like it and all.  It's just strange and so different.

[KathyLauren]

5 minutes ago, Ivy said:

It's kinda like I really didn't expect to be where I am these days. 

 

LOL!  None of us did.  There is an ancient Yiddish saying: "Man plans; God laughs."  That about sums up everyone's life, not just us trans folks.  The secret to a happy life is just to hang on and enjoy the ride.

 

I didn't plan almost anything of where I am now.  It has been an interesting life.  But planned?  😄😄😄

[awkward-yet-sweet]

I think a lot of life's enjoyment comes from living in the moment.  I have any plans for the future....none whatsoever.  My life has already turned out so different from what I might have expected. 

 

I spent this morning with my GF in the kitchen making cookies, and putting meat in a big vat to marinate.  Tomorrow evening is the Super Bowl, so gotta have snacks for the party.  None of us are really avid football fans, but it is a good excuse to get together with others from our community.  GF used to live in Kansas City, so sometimes she likes to watch a Chiefs game, especially the big ones like this.  We've got a projector and a huge screen at the social hall, so plenty of room.  I'll be spending most of my time with food and monitoring the kids as they run around. 

[Jani]

2 hours ago, KathyLauren said:

I didn't plan almost anything of where I am now.  It has been an interesting life.  But planned? 

I'm certain had we known, the lead up would have been much different.  Probably much less stressful.

 

[Marcie Jensen]

3 hours ago, awkward-yet-sweet said:

I think a lot of life's enjoyment comes from living in the moment.  I have any plans for the future....none whatsoever.  My life has already turned out so different from what I might have expected. 

 

I spent this morning with my GF in the kitchen making cookies, and putting meat in a big vat to marinate.  Tomorrow evening is the Super Bowl, so gotta have snacks for the party.  None of us are really avid football fans, but it is a good excuse to get together with others from our community.  GF used to live in Kansas City, so sometimes she likes to watch a Chiefs game, especially the big ones like this.  We've got a projector and a huge screen at the social hall, so plenty of room.  I'll be spending most of my time with food and monitoring the kids as they run around. 

I couldn't agree more about living in the moment.

 

Ax a Kansas City native who remembers when the Chiefs moved there, I'm all in for the Chiefs. I'm also going to Sedona later today since I live about a mile from the stadium and don't want to cope with the noise, crowds etc.  

[Lelouch vi Ushiromiya]

Hello, I'm Lelouch. I enjoy coffee every morning when I wake up. It's afternoon but I'm about ready to have my second cup. Hope everybody reading this is doing well. Even if you're not, hang in there, things will get better. ❤️

[awkward-yet-sweet]

2 hours ago, Marcie Jensen said:

I'm also going to Sedona later today since I live about a mile from the stadium and don't want to cope with the noise, crowds etc.  

I'm jealous 😉 Sedona is lovely during the cool time of year.  I'd love to go camping out there sometime.  My GF likes it there too, but going with her means staying at a resort hotel on the top floor.  Gotta have a soft nest with silky sheets and plenty of room service for my spoiled Russian.  

[Mmindy]

@WillowI love the meme 

 

Good evening everyone, 

 

We’re off the road safe and sound in Birmingham, AL it was an uneventful drive. 
 

Goodnight,

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

[Marcie Jensen]

12 hours ago, awkward-yet-sweet said:

I'm jealous 😉 Sedona is lovely during the cool time of year.  I'd love to go camping out there sometime.  My GF likes it there too, but going with her means staying at a resort hotel on the top floor.  Gotta have a soft nest with silky sheets and plenty of room service for my spoiled Russian.  

Sedona is a beautiful place. Especially this time of year. And, the camping is phenomenal. I don't have a hotel, though. One of the girls in my local support group owns property there and several of us are getting together for a Superbowl party away from Phoenix. We're even BBQing a whole hog. 

[Bri2020]

Hi everyone, remember me? lol.  Sorry life pulled me away from you all for a bit. It's been crazy busy but that's not an excuse.

Some really deep conversations going on here. My thoughts on some it are: You have no idea what your life expectancy is going to be. All my grandparents died from different things, some very young, others late. My mom passed from cancer in her early 60s.  However, most of out grandparents and even siblings had different lifestyles and risk exposures.  We live differently now.  Disease detection is far more advanced, diets are generally healthier, etc etc.  For example, every one of my parents and grandparents smoked like chimneys and never did. I stopped eating fried foods and heavy steak and potatoes with lots of butter decades ago. I have no idea what my life expectancy will be, but I do know that now that I've started my new life in the right body, I am excited to make the most of it.  So with that in mind, my parting thought on this topic is, why not pursue your best life every day no matter how close or far away from your "life expectancy date" is?

 

Besides just working myself to the bone lately (in a fun way) I decided to get back to the gym and start the process of getting back to better health.  From Sept 2022 to Nov 2023 I had four significant surgeries and that took a big toll on my general fitness, weight, etc etc.  I missed going swimming and hitting the saunas. I stopped going to the gym at the beginning of Covid and then started transitioning so I didn't feel comfortable in a womens or mens locker room/sauna situation. Now that I've recovered from bottom surgery I felt it was time to get back.

I was a little nervous at first but within a few days felt right at home.  I haven't had any negative experiences except a potentially minor one. I was in the sauna (towelled appropriately) very early on a Sunday morning and an older Middle Eastern woman came in, looked at me for a moment then sat down down as far away as possible. She glanced at me again. Within a minute she decided to leave.  Was she just hoping to have the sauna to herself or was she uncomfortable. I will never know but that's the closest it has been to there being any issue. I've even clocked ( I think) two other trans women there. 

I picked up pickleball and am now addicted. So much fun!  I'm having to slow my roll on that a bit though because 4-6 days a week was killing my knees. Now I only play twice a week.

Transition related thoughts: It's been so nice to not be doing all the interventions for a couple of months.  I was fast tracking my transition over the last 2.5 years to the point of sheer exhaustion. That break is coming to an end though. My big scar alone my forehead from FFS is going to be dealt with. Kaiser finally got an FFS surgeon in house who also specializes in scar revisions. SHe suggested an aggressive microneedling for a couple session to see if the scar will remodel. If that fails I will have is surgically revised.  Ugh.  I'm also starting back on facial electrolysis out in Chicago in March.  Hopefully only need 2 more of their marathon sessions. about 80% of my facial hair is gone but the neck is still at about 50%.  On a positive side, after 2 plus years of little to no T, my back and chest hair has finally thinned out enough that I don't deal with the back and only deal with the chest every 2-3 weeks verses more than once a week.

My vaginoplasty is now 4 months post op. Most of it has healed nicely. Dilations are down to 2 times a day. There is a bit of a granuloma formed over the clitoral hood which I may have revised but waiting a bit on that. On a deep personal level, while my neoclitoris has sensation i have yet to manage anything close to an arousal state. My surgeon said that's not unusual. He's confident that things will work with a little more time.  I think there is a mental aspect to all of this since my libido has been really low and dilations are such a chore to me the idea of playing down there hasn't been something I get excited about so a lot of this may be a mental issue.

I am however finally feeling like it might be time to look into dating again. Not that I have time  haha. 

[Mmindy]

Good morning, breakfast, then it’s on the road to Laurel, MS 
 

I remember @Bri2020 Thanks for the update. Hugs.

[Willow]

Good morning

 

Plan is to go to a new to us church today.  A couple of neighbors and friends have invited us.  We are looking for a congregation that will be transgender friendly.

 

@awkward-yet-sweet when we went to Sedona we also thought it was a beautiful place.  Wished we’d had a Jeep to drive off into the desert, but alas we had an airport rental.

 

Taliesson West outside Phoenix was quite interesting too.

 

@bri2020 welcome back.  Good to see you again.  Certainly life has been keeping you busy.  Glad to see you are happy.

 

@Marcie Jensen your whole hog bbq sounds great.  Are you burying it Hawaiian style or doing it on a spit western style?  Both are great of course.

 

Well, I guess I need to start getting ready.  I messed up my nail polish yesterday so that’s going to take some extra time.

 

hugs

 

Willow

[KathyLauren]

1 hour ago, Bri2020 said:

the idea of playing down there hasn't been something I get excited about

 

Hi, @Bri2020, good to see you.

 

I am 3 years post-op.  My clitoris has sensation and some mild arousal is possible, but I have heard that 90% of the "big O" is mental.  With no libido, I just haven't gotten there.  Like you, I just can't get excited about making the effort.