Good morning All. Coffees on.

[Maddee]

Good morning.

Justine that's a big not-easy deal.
You called with the intention of telling him.   That itself is an action you are now practiced in

[Willow]

If he was alive, I don’t know how my father would take it.  He was born in the 1890s and had a lot of family ideals based on that time frame.  Yet he had progressive ideas and would do anything for me.  My mother wouldn’t have been an issue.  If anyone thought I was different it was her.

 

i planned on telling my doctor first but chickened out.  Then it got so bad I practically begged a therapist to take me on.

 

willow

 

[TommieAnne]

1 hour ago, Willow said:

If he was alive, I don’t know how my father would take it.  He was born in the 1890s and had a lot of family ideals based on that time frame.  Yet he had progressive ideas and would do anything for me.  My mother wouldn’t have been an issue.  If anyone thought I was different it was her.

 

i planned on telling my doctor first but chickened out.  Then it got so bad I practically begged a therapist to take me on.

 

willow

 

I'm supposed to broach my status with my Primary Care doctor on Monday. I suspect he must already know since it's in my medical records. But it feels weird to have to open the topic and discuss it. But I have a written agenda for the appointment with all my topics covered. So I'll go down the list dutifully.

On the other hand, my therapist was supposed to contact him regarding his comfort level with treating a transfemme. So the eggs may already be in the pan. I'll just be cracking them again?

In other things, weird stormy weather and self-quarantine have made for odd things in life. I'm concerned over this silly plague, that it is more likely a product of Chinese germ warfare research, since the virus bears components of SARS, HIV as well as bat viruses.

TA

[KymmieL]

Well it is my Sunday. Snowy and mid 30 on the fence thermometer. looking at a high of 43 after a low of 0.

As yesterday. just plan on staying home today. futzing around with different things.

 

Have a happy and healthy day. and stay safe.

 

Kymmie

[Willow]

When I did discuss being transgender with my doctor, he knew because of the therapist.  He spent 90 minutes with me then had me come back the next week with my wife and spent 2 ½ hours with us.  For his own reasons he would not help with HRT but did refer me to an endocrinologist who has me on hrt

Willow

[Tessa]

In this isolation Tessa wants to be heard and loved. I notice I am actually craving things. One would be Oreos and milk. Another is wanting to be held and cuddled and told I love you. In my battle between Tessa and my male part it seems Tessa always wins. Went grocery shopping and bought myself 3 sun dresses. What is it when I put on a dress and fix myself up I feel so good! It’s just fabric? Here is some notes in my recent diary: 

 

“Tessa knows what she has to do and she gets it done. .....(male name) is not sure of himself and always puts himself down. Tessa and ..... have different personalities but must live together inside my head...” 

 

Being vulnerable here. To fully transition would be to hard for me. My family would turn away and I would lose to much. So my battle is in my mind. I know I have more woman in me that is a fact. I’m emotional, I love to read, write, color, romantic movies, dress up, teach, take photos, make people smile...My body is skinny and stays skinny. I shave my legs and love how soft skin feels. I love baths and hot showers. I flirt and want to be cuddled and held all day. 
 

My perfect day would be dressed in a beautiful dress and walking to the park holding my lovers hand. Them looking at me and telling me how beautiful I am! My lover would take me in their arms and kiss me! We would cuddle together and be so in love! 
 

When I’m alone like now. I am in my right element. Fully dressed as a woman accept for a wig. I want to let my natural beauty show. My hair is light brown and cut short but I have bangs which is nice. I also love refreshing smells like lavender and other fragrances. I love bright colors. When I watch a romantic movie I see myself as the woman not the man. Do you see much man in me? Because I don’t. 
 

To be Tessa is to be this amazing poetic creative person that wherever she goes she brightens the room! To be full of positive energy and to be able to show love and sympathy at the right time. To be able to be free and not worry about what people will think of you. To express an inner beauty that is innocent but provocative.

Tessa will turn your eye from whatever your looking at and demand you look at her. You want to do things for her. (This actually always happens) I can be in totally male clothes and go somewhere and people will do things for me. People have (Opened doors, free drinks and food, given me money, compliment me on my clothes...etc) Tessa is so loving when you meet her you want to dream with her. She will always make you laugh and compliment you. She can take a bad thing and turn it into good! She is an amazing artist in how she paints herself! 
 

My male side is insecure and works out of his self pity. He feels less of himself compared to others. He gets easily frustrated and tends to give up. He dwells on the past and can’t see into the present and blinds himself of the future. He talks about his pain and can’t seem to let go. He feels unworthy to be a man because he is skinny and does not have the body structure of a man either does he like the things men do. So he always feels inferior. He is kind and considerate but lacks the self confidence to use those traits to his advantage. He’s always trying to fix people but forgets that he needs to be fixed himself. 
 

Now you see the battle I face. Make vs Female inside my brain. 
 

That really felt good to get that out. I’m crying out to find the authentic me as we all are. Knowing who you are is half the battle but once you know that the battle begins on how you will live that and express it to the world! 
 

Reflection is the revelation of who you are and gives you the direction of where you should go. 
 

I love to write Babes...We are all beautiful and wonderful and gorgeous and precious and worthy of this life! Don’t let anyone tell you your not. 
 

All my love! 
 

Tessa ?‍?
 

 

[Erikka]

God morgen,  sky is darkly overcast this morning. Going to Start a new painting today. The current one I am working on I have to  wait for some pouring medium before I can finish that one. Today’s work will be a painting called “Don’t You Know This is a -censored- War Zone?” Or   I might do “Nickels, Dimes and Typhoid Fever”.  Tune into my trans support group on Zoom. Take a walk and then back into the studio. Doing a series of 12 paintings that deal with my experiences in the South Pacific and Southeast Asia during Vietnam. Not the ugly stuff but the interesting, strange, culturally different experiences to remind me that in spite of everything that was going on, it wasn’t all ugly and traumatic, but it was life changing.

[KathyLauren]

This morning, I took the garbage down to the end of the driveway.  Not a big adventure, but, at 800 feet, it's the longest walk I've done in two weeks.  I'm still finding it difficult to move around a lot.

 

Sprayed the peach trees with dormant oil / sulphur to prevent leaf curl.  PU!

 

Then, my wife and I made (tsk!) a non-essential trip into town.  We drove to A&W for burgers, fries, and coffee.  Well, it was essential for our mental health.  (That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.) 

 

The sit-down part of the restaurant was closed, but the drive-through window was open.  We parked in their parking lot and ate our burgers there, just like the good old days before drive-thrus, when you ordered by intercom from your parking spot and a waitress would deliver your food on a tray that hung on your car window.  If you remember those days, you're old!

 

Since this is the coffee thread, I'll report that their coffee is really good!

[Jani]

I remember those days @KathyLauren!  In fact my dad worked a part time job at one when I was young. They probably don't do it any longer but they used to serve their root beer in various size glass mugs.  I remember the tray on the door sill where the edge fit into the slot for the window.  I think Sonic may still do that.  I looked and the nearest one to me is either in Rhode Island or Vermont, so too far away.  I guess I am old!  Boo Hoo. 

[Tessa]

Going through drive throughs Is pretty much the highlight of “Going Out” these days. Dating these days is spending time at home cuddling and watching a movie. I’m single and all alone so I can only pretend to have someone here. I know it sounds crazy but it helps. 
 

My highlight today was going grocery shopping and buying a few dresses. I do take the kids when I see them through Sonic drive through. 
 

I just finished a movie and now I think I will do some writing. I post stories on this Chapter App on the my IPhone. (Chapters) If you and your wife want to read an exotic romance download Chapters and look for (My Crush) You’ll know it’s my story because it will have a black n white background of NY and it will say Tessa. 

 

Enjoy one another during this time. 
 

love ya all

 

Tessa?‍?

[KathyLauren]

2 hours ago, Jani said:

They probably don't do it any longer but they used to serve their root beer in various size glass mugs.

 

Actually, they still serve root beer in those glass mugs.  A "small" is pretty big, and a "large" is beyond my capacity.  I'll sometimes get root beer on a hot summer day, but mostly I have coffee.  Coffee is a treat for me.

[KymmieL]

I love A&W. Of course we don't have one here anymore. We go down to the in Burthud CO.it is a stand alone one with a drive in. Since most of the time we take the Motorcycle down. We eat inside. OF course have to get the Root beer in the frosted mugs.

 

We have started collecting the mugs and jugs. We have the 100th ann, in both mug and gallon jug.

Lets go one better, When is the last time you went to a drive in movie?

2009 for us.

Kymmie

[KathyLauren]

43 minutes ago, KymmieL said:

Lets go one better, When is the last time you went to a drive in movie?

2009 for us.

 

Actually went to one?  Hmm ... about 1976!  But there is one that is still active about 20 minutes from here.  The last one in Nova Scotia, I think.

[Willow]

5 or 6 years ago.  There is a pretty good one in Stephens City Virginia.  That’s where I lived until I retired.

 

My best friend in High School family owned an A&W.  They hired high school girls as carhops.  The menu was a billboard. When you wanted a carhop you turned on your headlights.  Baby beers were free.

[TommieAnne]

14 hours ago, KymmieL said:

I love A&W. Of course we don't have one here anymore. We go down to the in Burthud CO.it is a stand alone one with a drive in. Since most of the time we take the Motorcycle down. We eat inside. OF course have to get the Root beer in the frosted mugs.

 

We have started collecting the mugs and jugs. We have the 100th ann, in both mug and gallon jug.

Lets go one better, When is the last time you went to a drive in movie?

2009 for us.

Kymmie

Believe it or not, my town in the Ozarks has a still operating drive in movie theater. It does a booming business in warmer weather. I haven't actually been, except to drive there and gawk.

The town also has an old fashioned, not name brand dairy bar that makes killer milkshakes.

But I'm in the wildest part of the Ozarks. In a lot of ways, little has changed in the last 100 years here.

Finishing coffee. Time to get busy drawing again.

TA

 

[Oh_Kay]

In my area there was Dogs and Suds. Root beer and hotdogs brought out to your car. When I was really young, I think the girls who brought the food to your car were wearing roller skates.              

[Susan R]

33 minutes ago, Oh_Kay said:

In my area there was Dogs and Suds.

We have two popular fast food places like that here in Seattle metro. Burger master and Sonic.  They bring it to your vehicle.  Both have great menus.  Unfortunately, I no longer eat that kind of food but I still think about it from time to time. Mmmmm! So good!

[Oh_Kay]

Good Morning! I love my coffee. I say "I'm having a mini love affair with my coffee!" every morning!

 

 

[KathyLauren]

Yum!  I just had my Sunday morning double espresso: fair trade Sumatran.  Oatmeal porridge with raisins and prunes (prunes are my friend!), and toast with home-made black currant jam.  OMG, those currants are SO good!  And a glass of orange juice.

 

It's a cool but sunny day.  And it's supposed to stay clear tonight, so I'll probably be taking star pictures after dark.  THis is one from last week:

[Charlize]

Great 8 O'Clock morning coffee in sunshine this morning.  While corvid rages out there we are good today on the farm.  

I remember the last time i had food delivered to the car was at a Sonic in Mississippi.  The cute young girls there came out on roller skates.  Too cool.

Be safe

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Willow]

Good morning.

Drinking Dunkin Dark, black.

 

Tonight and tomorrow could be a repeat of last Sunday Monday.  Severe storms are predicted again. Last weeks were the worst to hit SC since 1984.  I sure hope these aren’t as bad.

 

People here are getting anxious to get out and make things normal again.  Unfortunately that will probably make things worse and take even longer to get over it.

 

The Governor did reopen boats ramps and fishing.  You can’t stop moving unless you are fishing and no more than two in the boat unless they live together.  They may reopen the beaches this week but no chairs, umbrellas or beach blankets.  Here again you have to keep moving (walking).

 

We all have to deal with a new normal.

 

Williw

[Debra Michelle]

Proud of my husband,doing good quiting smoking since his bypass.His doctor is even amazed he has done good so far.Did say it was hard at first,it has been worth it.I am glad he did it for me as well,I'm very allergic to cigarette smoke getting sick from the chemicals in smoke.Plus my husband and I thinking about us getting intimate with me as a post op for the first time next month.So far,good with my healing since I had my GCS in January.My mom,she is glad to have a daughter now.Been with my mom since my dad's death,been doing well moving on.It did take time at first knowing he is no longer in pain.She is glad my brothers and I are helping her out.I keep her car fixed.My younger brother,he fixes anything broken in the house.My two older brothers,they do invite her over for supper once in a while.

[Susan R]

@Debra Michelle A very nice update to report. Glad the healing with GCS is doing well and that your hubby is doing well also.

 

Well I got up at 7am wide awake.  Got to sleep at 2:30am so I’m gonna pay for it later today.  It’s still early but I’m trying to decide whether I should try to get another hour of sleep or start the coffee. Haha..These are the hard choices one makes during a huge pandemic...lol

[Oh_Kay]

Debra Michelle,

 

Enjoy your mom for every minute! Life is so precious! Good luck to your husband!

[Jani]

3 hours ago, KathyLauren said:

It's a cool but sunny day.  And it's supposed to stay clear tonight, so I'll probably be taking star pictures after dark.  THis is one from last week:

@KathyLauren this is so neat.  I clicked on the photo to enlarge it and it opened to a page where all the information about it was given.  Very interesting.  Thanks! 

 

@Debra Michelle Great update.  Good for your husband too!  All my best to both of yo.