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KymmieL

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20 hours ago, Mmindy said:

Suzie said she is leaning to a Quaker view, that everyone is accepted without judgement. Be kind and kindness will be returned.

Hugs for everyone (masked where required)

 

Mindy??️‍??

 

 

 

I don't know much about the various sects of Christianity but I do know that the quakers were one of the denominations that had a booth at our Pride fair and were doing face painting among other things for all the participants so they don't seem to have issues with us at all :)

On 7/5/2021 at 7:50 AM, Elizabeth Star said:

 

 

All-in-all, it went really good. There's no longer that feeling of tension in the house.❤️

 

 

Sounds like a breakthrough. 2 steps forward as they say.  Their might be the occasional step back but forward progress is being made!

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Find myself reflecting on this last year a lot.  Progress is slow and hard to see sometimes but I found a selfie of me the first or second day I presented publicly as Bri just about a year ago and made a side by side from a pic from the 4th of July.  I see a lot of changes and progress.  Now if I can work more on my patience.......

Screen Shot 2021-07-05 at 8.06.57 AM.png

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2 hours ago, Alice_Sybilina said:

@Bri2020 I can't get over how nice you look in all your pictures. 

Thank you ☺️

Helps to have lots of love and support, lucky genetics, and just as important I think is self confidence. ( and many many hours of electrolysis hahaha)

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Hi everyone 

 

waiting for my daughter to arrive. She’s getting close.  This could be interesting.  They haven’t seen me like this.  
 

I know they’ll be tired.  It’s a long drive.  
 

Willow

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7 hours ago, Bri2020 said:

I see a lot of changes and progress.

I see the changes too…all very positive changes and not only just your looks and presentation but your confidence as you mentioned. “You’ve come a long way baby!” (anyone remember that cigarette commercial tagline? lol) It fits here!

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@Bri2020@Jani@Confused1@Susan R@Shay
Thank you for your support. I believe Suzie is coming around, however I don’t know what she’ll do when she finds out that her to small Leather Harley Jacket fits me.

 

@Alice_Sybilinalike you when I came out to my wife it jarred her world. (slight understatement) She is coming around now that she knows she is still my number one love. We’ve been married 45 years and this is not the retirement she had planned. She is doing her own research on husbands who come out #LGBTQ. She knows we’re on a slow transition, ?️‍⚧️ transition is happening. The best thing about coming out to a spouse, in my opinion, is the stress relief you have because you’re not hiding in the closet anymore. We can talk honestly to one another without bombshells catching them or us off guard. 
 

Hugs for all, 

 

Mindy??️‍⚧️?

400225CD-01BC-42C3-9559-1340CAC15203.jpeg

8EB078F5-D7D0-448D-A7C3-820652875604.jpeg

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4 hours ago, Willow said:

They haven’t seen me like this.

@WillowI hope everything goes well with your daughter. 
 

Hugs,

 

Mindy??️‍⚧️?

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13 hours ago, Alice_Sybilina said:

Coming out kind of jarred my wife, but she dove right in. She let me know what she was worried about (me leaving her or deciding I liked men more than women) but she had my back from the first word. 11 years married and she's still the woman of my dreams. I'm highly empathic so I keep seeing her uncertainty but since I'm not supposed to be able to be in other people's heads I respect that she still has a few things to work through but she hasn't pulled away or asked for some time alone. I always knew she was my blessing, but every day she gets more and more amazing. 

It's nice to hear stories of acceptance.  So many ladies (and gents) here were met with disapproval from their loved ones.  I was one of the lucky girls, and my wife was more or less on board - I just learned not to rush too fast, so she has time to process.  Her dad was also accepting but had some odd concerns that I might need to bring a "third" into my marriage.

 

7 hours ago, Willow said:

waiting for my daughter to arrive. She’s getting close.  This could be interesting.  They haven’t seen me like this.  

Hang in there, girl! The wait will soon be over, and I think you're goning to do just fine!

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Being sad about the lack of any real positivity about the 20th anniversary inspired me to finally book an appointment to have my hair done by the wife of a friend I made elsewhere on the internet. About 40 minutes away. 

 

Of course it turned out to be part hair care/part therapy session. When she said how she felt the 'I didn't sign up for this' when her spouse came out to her I thought I'd get to hear how long it took her to be so supportive and had a bit of a letdown when she said it was almost instantaneously, as I hit a year and counting waiting for support and not just resignation. 

 

I said I had some gray I wanted to maybe possibly treat and ended up with a new hair color and allowed her to remove some of the mullet (I was attached to every millimeter of growth) and of course when I saw the results I got a little weepy and got a better hug from her as I sat in the chair than I did from my own wife on our flipping 20th anniversary two days before.

 

Then a powerful thunderstorm prevented me from returning home right away, I ended up in a shopping mall (remember those?) walking around in my mixed gender clothes and my new pretty hair...I couldn't even think of what I needed to shop for in a pretty sparsely populated mall...I have recently picked up a few things for my current 'lifestyle' (working from home for rest of summer at least). 

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12 hours ago, Mmindy said:

@Alice_Sybilinalike you when I came out to my wife it jarred her world. (slight understatement) She is coming around now that she knows she is still my number one love. We’ve been married 45 years and this is not the retirement she had planned. She is doing her own research on husbands who come out #LGBTQ. She knows we’re on a slow transition, ?️‍⚧️ transition is happening. The best thing about coming out to a spouse, in my opinion, is the stress relief you have because you’re not hiding in the closet anymore. We can talk honestly to one another without bombshells catching them or us off guard. 

It was the same for me too. I was retired for 2 years before I came out. I had to. My life was in a downward spiral. I had to do something quick before I couldn't change directions. For a while she kept waiting for "The other shoe to drop". When it didn't, and she saw how I could finally be open with her, her fears went away. It's still a struggle for both of us, but we are working it out. A lot of compromise on both our parts. I want to speed ahead and she wants to drag her feet. We are progressing. Yay !!!

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Good morning.

 

I can relate to unacceptance, not because of a wife, but because I've been alone most of my life.  It's like I reject myself, so that noone else can.  Noone can get that close to me.  My own doing, but it often seems like it's the other people rejecting me.  

 

Feel as though I have certainly put in my time being out in public, as an example...of...something.... 

 

Years of daily public experience have changed my passing acceptability.  But still feeling the smirks.   And sometimes worse, especially every time something trans hits the news and social media, stirring up people's feelings. 

I'm sorry anyone has to feel bad upon seeing me.  Even if it's not about me.

 

I'm at my parents apartment today.  They've known for years.  But I don't dress too femme or wear makeup here.  My dad's health is not good, and he speaks of being gone.  He scowls at me and calls me "he" always. My mom used to call me "she" and correct him, but has called me "he" for a long time now.

 

Plans for this day+  :

 

Going to a speech therapy appointment this morning.  I've written down a page of phrases that I use every day.

 

Then back here to take folks to breakfast. 

I will sleep, then I plan to attend a girls night, i'm invited to,  at a bar downtown. "Trans girls, crossdressers, and admirers".

I will try to smile a little and not worry about the lines on my face, etc.

 

My schedule is up all night, so at some point I will drive back north to home.

That morning I'm meeting a friend, from forums, who is mtf. 

We will run.

 

Have a good one.

 

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Good morning 

 

Well everything went fine with our daoghter and granddaughters.  We even went to the pool.  First time in a swimsuit.  I was a little apprehensive about that.

 

my daughter asked to borrow my computer this morning . Sure says I.  It might need to be charged.  Yup needed to be charged.  No big deal the charger is in the drawer.  No it was as the, my wife had packed it and that means it’s no computer for the next 6 months.  Well, I have several and I managed to find a charger for one i have that I don’t really like but at least it’s not packed.  She has been admonished not to pack this one.  At least she was all oh oh, I think I packed that and no one got terribly upset.  Now, pack the last one and things could change.

 

 

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@Maddee you are making progress and family is tough... I couldn't face that and both parents and brother gave passed and I don't keep up with the other so never dealt with family.

 

@Willow congrats on swim suit maybe next year for me. I hope.

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I did forget to mention that we have a tropical storm warning posted for late this afternoon into tomorrow morning for Hurricane Elsa.  The boat is safely tied up.  And the marina where it is is considered to be a giddy hole, meaning as safe an anchorage as can be found around here.  Well off the river and several miles from the coast.

 

Willow

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I totally agree with Maddee. Hunker down friend. Stay safe.

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I'm dragging my a#&^ today. I have dreams of things that had broken or been lost last night, just little snippets but all randomly connected.  I think my subconscious is expressing my insecurities around abandonment right now.  My wife and I are making some progress though.  We are trying to be more open and expressive of our needs.  She knows I need a deeper level of intimacy being expressed so we have taken to having "naked nights" where we cuddle before bed. (sex is off the table for both of us right now). It's been years since we have done this and we both agree it's been very nice (until she has a hot flash and breaks out in a massive sweat lol). 

Today I see the psychiatrist for the first time since I had that massive breakdown.  It's got me really apprehensive and worried that they might use my mental health situation and challenges to delay my surgical approvals.

My wife suggested I at least have a "pretty day" and seriously do my hair, makeup and dress fun to help me with my spirit.  I complied and it's helping.  Plus, I was able to shower, wash this mass of hair and do a full style/blow out plus full makeup in less than hour!  Progress!  I don't do those hardcore makeup routines to disguise your features and transform into more "femme". I just do a basic foundation, a little bronzer and blush, eyeshadow/mascara and lipstick.  Just enough to smooth and blend things.

 

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Well my Friday. Tomorrow is just a blood draw here in town. And forecast to be hot, 90. I know it isn't hot to some but up here at 7220ft it is.

 

Well me and my wife's conversation from last week never finished. It is back to the same cool relationship. Took a ride to Centennial for ice cream on Sunday. Wound up getting drenched in the process. but for good ice cream it was worth it.

 

At least a three day weekend for me. Saturday I have a car show to attend. I will probably get the old you was back, from my wife. I have always loved going to car shows.

 

Kymmie

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@MaddeeI think just about every time I've felt hurt or insecure it's been my fault. I sometimes project my feelings and see them in others. I've thrown a couple guys before my wife pointed this out to me.

 

Sometimes we are the only enemies we have. 

 

Stay strong. 

Stay happy. 

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Good morning 

 

I slept in a bit late.  canine alarm didn’t go off. However, the Tornado watch alarm woke me up at 2 and the tornado warning woke me up later.  Then a thunderstorm.  Right now it’s a little windy and overcast.

 

well second outing in my swimsuit yesterday we went to the beach.  I felt a little like the girl in the song itsy bitsy bikini. No I don’t have one but it is a two piece tankini.

 

I am not used to all this commotion but I love it.  My daughter told me yesterday our granddaughters wanted to respect me but didn’t know what to call me.  I told her I was ok with her still calling me dad and them calling me Gramps.  Just knowing they accept me and want to honor me is enough.  I’ve never been someone that gets real upset when people who know me miss gender me.  Switching is tough..

 

have a great day and be safe.

 

Willow

 

 

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1 hour ago, Willow said:

 I told her I was ok with her still calling me dad and them calling me Gramps.  Just knowing they accept me and want to honor me is enough.  I’ve never been someone that gets real upset when people who know me miss gender me.

This is pretty much how I feel - especially with family.

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On 7/7/2021 at 8:11 AM, Bri2020 said:

It's been years since we have done this and we both agree it's been very nice (until she has a hot flash and breaks out in a massive sweat lol).

 

Yeah, laugh it up. You know what happens for about a month before surgery? We go off our HRT. You know what happens then? Forget about sweating through the sheets, I sweat through the MATRESS. ?

 

You will feel her pain on that one. I was worried that if my spouse and I had a hot flash at the same time we'd burn down the house.

 

Hugs!

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I get miss gendered all the time at work. I am mature enough to let it slide. I am tempted to get the trans flag pin, "she, Her, hers" an wear it at work. Or try and find one, "Yes, I am female". deal with it. but that one may be pushing it some. LOL

 

Going to head out shortly to work on finding the leak in the middle of the windshield, on the wagon. Then to work on the cruise control install. Have to do some blood work today. But It is in town so I am going to take a nice ride. then back to work on the car until it gets too hot then in the house.

I preparation for the metal work on the wagon, I broke down and purchased a Mig welder from Eastwood. Now just need a small argon bottle for the shielding gas.

 

Hugs,

Kymmie

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6 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

I was worried that if my spouse and I had a hot flash at the same time we'd burn down the house.

@Jackie C.you are the master of verbal humor, and mental pictures. ???️

 

Hugs,

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