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KymmieL

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46 minutes ago, Ivy said:

Yeah, the "Holidays" are not an exclusively christian thing.

And yet, Christmas has been an official U.S. holiday since June 28, 1870 when president Grant signed the bill that made it law. 

 

Everyone is free to celebrate whatever they want, and enjoy said holiday, so enjoy the season!

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1 hour ago, Marcie Jensen said:

Christmas has been an official U.S. holiday since June 28, 1870 when president Grant signed the bill that made it law. 

Yeah.  All this talk about a "war on Christmas" is nonsense.  It's like trying to pick a fight just to fight.  Kinda un-christmasy.

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9 hours ago, Trans22 said:

@Willow Linux isn't as disk, memory, or CPU hungry as Windows - so you can play with Linux on old, but otherwise functional, hardware/PCs that are no longer supported by the latest version of Windows.

 

I was a Windows 7 user until Microsoft ended its support. That was an opportune time for me to try Linux.

 

Despite its many touted advantages, I found using the Zorin distro didn't meet my needs in some ways. I found the requirement to enter strings of coding cumbersome. Also, I'm a full-time writer who needs to respond quickly to clients, and the LibreOffice word processing program was problematic compared to the software I'd been using with Windows. My favorite image editor wouldn't work at all with Linux, and I could not find anything else that I liked. I should mention that I run a lean and mean workstation because I have to get things done quickly and efficiently. The fact that my desktop screen has so few icons is testament to the fact that I abhor bloatware.

 

I've bought nothing but refurbished PCs for years, and the latest one came with Windows 10 installed. That's what I'm using now, and I have no complaints.

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Linux is a tiny player in the personal computing market - about 2% share of market I think.  I didn't get into it by choice - using it was essential for computer science at University and for my subsequent research (PhD in applied Mathematics).  I then got a job managing a research Linux cluster, so Linux is essential for me.  I now have four personal computers - 2 MacOS & 2 Ubuntu Linux.

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3 hours ago, Hannah Renee said:

I'm 70 years old, and until this very date one year ago, I had never heard of boxing day.

From memory, boxing day started as a reversal of roles day.  Rich people would "serve" and appreciate their servants on boxing day.  I wonder whether the practice is still in place anywhere?

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3 hours ago, Trans22 said:

From memory, boxing day started as a reversal of roles day.  Rich people would "serve" and appreciate their servants on boxing day.  I wonder whether the practice is still in place anywhere?

 

It is:  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boxing_Day

 

Astrid

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33 minutes ago, KymmieL said:

I first heard of boxing day from an episode of M.A.S.H.

It is mentioned in "A little Princess".

But I was aware of it.   Not really celebrated in the  US.   But we do (or did) do something similar.  You might leave cookies or a tip for the letter carrier.  

I worked collecting trash in public works for years.  At Christmas time some people would leave gifts or tips for the workers.  It was very much anticipated and appreciated.  Sadly over the years as things became more automated, it faded away.

I remember one lady who always baked one of her legendary pound cakes for each of my crew.  She took particular care that "her guys" got them - making that point at city hall even!  I know that my kids looked forward to this every year.  It was part of our Christmas.

There was a kind of personal relationship with each other that sadly I feel we are losing.

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My family started gathering on the 26th when one of my siblings would work on Christmas days decades ago and it evolved into a tradition even after that job was no more, so the growing knowledge of Boxing Day just gave us a different way to put it when we talk about it instead of saying 'the 26th' we now have some way to say it that sounds a little holiday-ish. 

 

We gathered again yesterday and so before that I came out (3rd calendar year now that I have been doing the 'coming out' thing headed to year 4!) to one more family member who somehow hadn't heard yet. 

 

 

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The support I have recieved has grown.The people that come in to work out have been there since the sexual assault happened to me.Boss banned the guy that did it to me from entering.Found out the police have finished their investigation,he will be charged with one count of sexual assault and a hate crime next month.Seen it was a hate crime as well.See the therapist today.I am happy with the progress,he is going away for a long time if convicted

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Good morning everyone,

 

It's the day after Christmas here in our house. The two youngest grandsons want to play with ever toy, and game all at once. We had a great family gathering last night.

 

This morning is moving slow.

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

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Good Morning

 

I didn’t get much sleep last night so I am definable behind.
 

 I don’t recall when or how I first learned about Boxing Day.  I believe you will find it celebrated in a good deal of the United Kingdom including Canada our neighbor to the north.  
 

@heatherd I am glad that so far things are working out (pun intended). I hope the guy gets all he has coming to him.  He should have to go on the registry as well as spend time in jail.  
 

now your task at hand is to start putting this behind you.  I know that won’t be easy.

 

Willow

 

image.thumb.png.b1e38544c96e0a24064c23fbe8395a98.png

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45 minutes ago, Willow said:

Good Morning

 

I didn’t get much sleep last night so I am definable behind.
 

 I don’t recall when or how I first learned about Boxing Day.  I believe you will find it celebrated in a good deal of the United Kingdom including Canada our neighbor to the north.  
 

@heatherd I am glad that so far things are working out (pun intended). I hope the guy gets all he has coming to him.  He should have to go on the registry as well as spend time in jail.  
 

now your task at hand is to start putting this behind you.  I know that won’t be easy.

 

Willow

 

image.thumb.png.b1e38544c96e0a24064c23fbe8395a98.png

Found he has done it in the past,got a plea deal doing a few years and on probation for 2 years.It is going to take one step at a time to recover from it.I want him to suffer in prison for a long time.

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Seen the therapist and know what has to be worked on.Plus she told me about a support group for transsexual and transgender women that are sexual crime victims.Plus I can bring someone that has supported me.My twin brother is going with me.The sexual assault I went through,he was outraged what this guy did to me

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Hi

 

Well I got my baking orders for tomorrow, another loaf of bread. At least  I’ve got a decent recipe to work with.

 

so I guess that’s on my schedule for tomorrow.

 

Willow

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@heatherd I'm glad you are getting the support you need.  The prosecution and therapy processes have got to be difficult.

 

My assault wasn't sexual in nature, but I'm feeling a bit apprehensive as the trial approaches.  Normal, I guess.  My family is angry at him, but I'm not really.  Frustrated at being injured and losing months of my artistic abilities, but not angry. Not sure how I will feel about it later, I just want it all to be over. 

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Good morning everyone 

 

the sun is out the temperature is rising it’s gonna be a good day.  Ok that’s enough partial song lyrics.

 

You know those times you can’t win, no matter what?  Well, I had one last night/this morning.  I was awake and our dog was on the floor next to the bed.  I patted the bed and whispered her name and she came to me. Laid on me and I was petting her.  This morning I said something about it and my wife complained about it and that I didn’t do it with her.  I commented that I can’t get to her because she is on the edge of the bed.  I got blasted for that.  Truth is we have a king bed with individual mattresses and adjustable.  What works for me doesn’t work for her and vice versa.  And there is a gap in the middle. I would have to lay in the gap.  Can’t win some days.

 

enjoy your day.  
 

Willow

 

 

image.thumb.png.7ae0f512bf271c424d3ebff9543a54f2.png

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Tough holiday this year. My mother died Christmas Eve after years of chemo.

No life insurance. Probably a couple bucks in her savings and no other family but me to take care of her affairs and everything.

I am managing.  She didn't want a funeral. I am cremating her. I have a close step-sister who is supportive and my bestie who I absolutely love with all my heart there if I need anything. Hoping this doesn't wipe my savings out but I will get by. 

With that other things have turned a corner too as my bestie who has PTSD, I am assuming from sexual trauma, finally came over to my place and we gift exchanged. She gets anxious even with being in cars with other people too. But I have never experienced this deep of a love that is still aromantic and yet delivers in so many ways.

Just goes to prove be patient and gentle, if it's worth having, it's worth waiting for.

Just life stuff...clouds, linings.

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22 hours ago, awkward-yet-sweet said:

@heatherd I'm glad you are getting the support you need.  The prosecution and therapy processes have got to be difficult.

 

My assault wasn't sexual in nature, but I'm feeling a bit apprehensive as the trial approaches.  Normal, I guess.  My family is angry at him, but I'm not really.  Frustrated at being injured and losing months of my artistic abilities, but not angry. Not sure how I will feel about it later, I just want it all to be over. 

Mine was in the genitals and breasts.The prosecutor is getting pressured to do a plea deal and drop the hate crime charges by the guy's lawyer.Has told him no,no plea deals

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8 minutes ago, heatherd said:

Mine was in the genitals and breasts.The prosecutor is getting pressured to do a plea deal and drop the hate crime charges by the guy's lawyer.Has told him no,no plea deals

 

The prosecutor in my case has no incentive for a plea deal.  The evidence is extremely solid.  I'm small enough I might have been killed, and from what I understand they considered a charge of attempted murder.  The prosecutor is going for the maximum sentence of 20 years, and I'm 99% sure the judge and jury will do it. 

 

My attacker could have been tried already, but his attorney has gotten the date pushed back and even attempted to get the case heard in another area.  There will probably be appeals later, so who knows how long this will drag on.  He was denied any bail...for his own safety, and for flight risk. Our judge knows my community would probably tear him to pieces if he didn't run. 

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@stveee, I'm so sorry for your loss. Particularly at this time of year. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. As well as for your bestie. PTSD is very debilitating and her progress is actually quite remarkable. I know from personal experience that it can take years to overcome. God bless you both.

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    • MaeBe
      1.  I think there are some legitimate concern.   2. Thoroughly discussing this will consume many threads.   3. I disagree partially with @MaeBe but there is partial agreement.   4. The context includes what is happening in society that the authors are observing.  It is not an isolated document.   The observation is through a certain lens, because people do things differently doesn't mean they're doing it wrong. Honestly, a lot of the conservative rhetoric is morphing desires of people to be treated with respect and social equity to be tantamount to the absolution of the family, heterosexuality, etc. Also, being quiet and trying to blend in doesn't change anything. Show me a social change that benefits a minority or marginalized group that didn't need to be loud.   5. Trump, if elected, is as likely to spend his energies going after political opponents as he is to implementing something like this.   Trump will appoint people to do this, like Roger Severino (who was appointed before, who has a record of anti-LGBTQ+ actions), he need not do anything beyond this. His people are ready to push this agenda forward. While the conservative right rails about bureaucracy, they intend to weaponize it. There is no question. They don't want to simplify government, they simply want to fire everyone and bring in conservative "warriors" (their rhetoric). Does America survive 4 year cycles of purge/cronyism?   6. I reject critical theory, which is based on Marxism.  Marxism has never worked and never will.  Critical theory has problems which would need time to go into, which I do not have.   OK, but this seems like every other time CRT comes up with conservatives...completely out of the blue. I think it's reference is mostly just to spark outrage from the base. Definitely food thought for a different thread, though.   7. There are groups who have declared war on the nuclear family as problematically patriarchal, and a lot of other terms. They are easy to find on the internet.  This document is reacting to that (see #4 above).   What is the war on the nuclear family? I searched online and couldn't find much other than reasons why people aren't getting married as much or having kids (that wasn't a propaganda from Heritage or opinions pieces from the right that paint with really broad strokes). Easy things to see: the upward mobility and agency of women, the massive cost of rearing children, general negative attitudes about the future, male insecurity, etc. None of this equates to a war on the nuclear family, but I guess if you look at it as "men should be breadwinners and women must get married for financial support and extend the male family line (and to promote "National Greatness") I could see the decline of marriage as a sign of the collapse of a titled system and, if I was a beneficiary of that system or believe that to NOT be tilted, be aggrieved.   8.  Much of this would have to be legislated, and this is a policy documented.  Implementation would  be most likely different, but that does not mean criticism is unwarranted.   "It might be different if you just give it a chance", unlike all the other legislation that's out there targeting LGBTQ+ from the right, these are going to be different? First it will be trans rights, then it will be gay marriage, and then what? Women's suffrage?   I get it, we may have different compasses, but it's not hard to see that there's no place for queer people in the conservative worldview. There seems to be a consistent insistence that "America was and is no longer Great", as if the 1950s were the pinnacle of society, completely ignoring how great America still is and can continue to be--without having to regress society to the low standards of its patriarchal yesteryears.    
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Cadillac parts are pretty expensive, so repairing them costs more.  But they don't seem to break down more than other makes.  Lots of Lincoln models use Ford cars as a base, so you can get parts that aren't much more expensive.    My family has had good luck with "Panther platform" cars.  Ford Crown Victoria, Mercury Marquis, Lincoln Towncar or Continental.  4.6 V8 and 5.0 V8.  Reasonable fuel economy, and fairly durable.  Our county sheriff's office was running Chargers and SUV's for a while, but has gone back to older Crown Victorias for ease of maintenance.  GF rebuilds them here.  But they are getting more scarce, since the newest ones were made in 2011.    1992-1997 years were different than the later years.  1998-2001 they did some changes, and apparently the best years are 2003 to 2011.  Check Craigslist, and also government auctions.  GF has gotten a lot of them at auction, and they can be had in rough-but-running shape for around $1,000.  Ones in great shape can be found in the $5,000+ range.  Good for 200,000 miles without significant rebuilding.  Go through engine and transmission and electrical systems, and they go half a million.    Some Chrysler models are OK.  The 300 mostly has the same engines as the Charger and Challenger, so parts availability is pretty good.  But they tend to get timing issues.  The older Chrysler Sebring convertibles were pretty reliable, sometimes going 200,000 miles without tons of problems, although after that they were pretty much worn out. 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I think I have read everything the Southern Baptists have to say on transgender, and it helped convince me they are dead wrong on these issues.  They can be nice people.  I would never join an SBC church.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      You come across as a thoughtful, sweet, interesting and pleasant person.    There are parts of this country, and more so the world, where evangelicals experience a great deal of finger wagging.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      It has been an interesting experience being in a marriage in a Christian faith community, yet being intersex/trans.  I stay pretty quiet, and most have kind of accepted that I'm just the strange, harmless exception.  "Oh, that's just Jen.  Jen is...different."  I define success as being a person most folks just overlook. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Well, I live in an area with a lot of Southern Baptists, Evangelicals, etc...  We've experienced our share of finger-wagging, as the "standard interpretation" of Scripture in the USA is that the Bible only approves of "one man, one woman" marriage.  My faith community is mostly accepted here, but that has taken time and effort.  It can be tough at times to continue to engage with culture and the broader population, and avoid the temptation to huddle up behind walls like a cult.    Tolerance only goes so far.  At one point, my husband was asked to run for sheriff.  He declined, partly because an elected official with four wives would have a REALLY tough time.  (Of course, making way less than his current salary wasn't an option either). 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      My bone structure is far more female than male.  I can't throw like a guy, which has been observed by guys numerous times, and moving like a woman is more natural.  It just is.  I'm not going out of my way to act in a fem. way, as you say, but I am letting go of some of the 'I am not going to move like that because I am a guy' stuff I have defensively developed.  The other breaks through anyway - there were numerous looks from people at work when I would use gestures that are forbidden to men, or say something spontaneously no guy would ever say.   At one point, maybe a year or more ago, I said it was unfair for people to think they were dealing with a man when they were actually dealing with a woman.    Girl here.  'What is a woman' is a topic for another day.
    • Willow
      Mom, I’m home!  What’s for lunch?   Leftover pizza .   ok.    Not exactly our conversation but there is truth in the answer.     @KymmieLsorry you are sick. Feel better soon.   Girl mode, boy mode no mode, not us. Nothing functional for either of us.   anyone here have or had a 10 year old (plus or minus) Caddy, Lincoln or Chrysler?  How was it?  Lots of repairs?  Comfortable seats? Anything positive or negative about it?  I need to replace my 2004 Ford Explorer Eddie Bauer, it’s eating $100 dollar bills and needs a couple of thousand dollars worth of work and that doesn’t even fix the check engine code.  Obviously, it isn’t worth putting that kind of money into a 20 year old car with a 174 thousand miles.   Willow
    • Ashley0616
      Oversized pink shirt, pink and black sports bra
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I think you mean the worst possible interpretation of 2025 situation.  Keep in mind that there are those who will distort and downright lie about anything coming from conservatives - I have seen it time and time again.  It's one of the reasons I want to read the thing slowly and carefully.  They want you to be very, very afraid. 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Here is where the expectation is that the stereotypical evangelical comes in finger wagging, disapproving and condemning.    Not gonna do that.   You have to work these things out.  Transgender issues put a whole different spin on everything and God understands what we are going through. I have enough trouble over here.  :)
    • Ivy
      You do you. You seem to be in a safe place if we end up with a 2025 situation.  But a lot of us are not.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Well, my marriage is different.  I'm actually part of a multi-partner marriage.  Like you see in the Book of Genesis.  My husband has four wives...and me.  I was kind of an accident, as our community sets the "reasonable maximum" at four wives, but that's a long story.  Plural marriage is approved in my faith community, with the exception of spiritual leaders, as described in 1 Timothy 3.  We believe that anything that isn't specifically prohibited is permitted.    The purpose of marriage is for people to work together, demonstrate the love of God, and to have children.  My faith believes in exponential reproduction - big families with lots of kids, both as a blessing and with the intention of using the size of our population for political ends.  Being intersex/trans and unable to bear children, I wouldn't have been a good candidate to be somebody's only spouse (the majority of our community tends toward traditional couple marriage).  Since my husband has other partners, I don't have to worry about the childbearing aspect, and I help out with raising our family's kids.  I'm a "bonus parent."    I'm not 100% open about my intersex/trans nature, although my community's leaders are aware of me.  Being transgender isn't condemned, but it is seen as a health problem derived from an imperfect, fallen world and an environment polluted with chemicals.  Since I'm married, I have a safe place to be, and I can live how I need to live.    I firmly believe the advice given in 1 Corinthians 7.  We don't totally own our bodies.  God gets a say, as I believe He created us to be male or female, not something outside the binary.  I don't think that transition without discussion with partners is OK....again, we don't totally own ourselves.  When I started to figure myself out, that was actually the main thing on my mind - will my partners accept me?  How will my position in the family change?  Since my partners don't really have a problem with the mild version of transition that I wanted to do, it has all been good. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Indeed.  While it seems like the majority of LGBTQ+ folks vote for Democrat candidates, not everybody drinks the Kool-Aid.  I'm a registered Independent, since I vote for individuals rather than party.  One of my trans friends is very pro-Trump - wears her MAGA hat and everything.  I find it interesting to see the reactions she gets... folks aren't always as tolerant as they claim to be.  Even on this forum, you get some real flak from Democrat voters....many will insist that the California way is the only way.    In my opinion, "Project 2025" isn't the real problem.  Check out UN "Agenda 2030."   
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      While Biden may be more friendly to trans folks, I'm not a single-issue voter.  I just can't choose a Democrat candidate, as I believe their actions will destroy my community and way of life.  Biden just announced that he wants to significantly increase capital gains taxes.  Maybe he intends to "tax the rich" but that is going to affect everything from land sales to grocery prices to the cost of electricity and even folks' retirement savings, as most companies make a large amount of their profits through investing in the market.  It is absolute lunacy to think that increased cost or reduced profits won't be passed on to the rest of us.  Things are going to get way worse at this rate.    Mostly, I vote in elections for state and local issues, as the national government is about as pleasant as a Porta-Potty in July.  So, either I'll do a write-in vote for president, or I'll check the box for Trump.  Anything but Biden.     
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