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KymmieL

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13 hours ago, HollyNG said:

My wife said she has planned a farewell to my male side get together Friday night.Plus she talked to her hairstylist about doing my hair on Saturday.Said her hairstylist will kindly do it.Wife is going to pay for it.I am more proud of my son,he has fully accepted it and said he wants to see me much happier as Holly

Way to go, Holly! This is awesome for you!

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3 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

 

Funny! My birth-giver said the same thing. I've apparently been tricked by Big Transgender. It's a whole pipeline from therapist to surgeon. Her thesis was really quite insane but she believes it right down to her toes.

 

Interesting @Jackie C.,Yesterday, a friend I've known for more than 30 years explained to me that this is all a big conspiracy concocted by a cabal consisting of QAnon, the Republican party, the AMA and the Christian right in order to seize power from the Democrats and kill democracy as we know it.  Who knew?

 

Like you, I've never been accused of corrupting anyone. But my friend's comments led me to do some research which was an eye opener. According to what I learned, the most recent polling (done by the Pew research Center in 2021) indicated that 76% of the adult population in the USA has never heard of QAnon, who seems to be the major proponent of the "groomer" thing, and of the 24% who have heard of them, only 17% actually support what QAnon believes. That would indicate about 4& of the total population supports this idiocy. That said, it's 4% too many; doesn't excuse their behavior--hatred, bigotry and ignorance are inexcusable, period and it's a sad and horrifying that as a community we have to endure this.

 

It simply reinforces my cynical belief that this country is either going insane or has already gone insane.

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1 hour ago, Marcie Jensen said:

Way to go, Holly! This is awesome for you!

Son has my old male Carhartt work coat for memories I gave him,it has helped him coping.Have most of my male wardrobe gone too.My mom,she is looking towards seeing her new daughter happy for the first time

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Glad to hear you gave the old Carhart to your son, Holly. And I get it about the male wardrobe. About the only thing I have left from that part of my life is my Class A uniform from my Army days. My daughter has said she wants it, but not until I pass.

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6 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

 

Are you sure? They get around. Like syphilis.

 

Anyway, I mean yeah. We go into therapy for problems we've been hiding because of stigma against mental illness and being trans. Can you even imagine coming out when I actually felt the first signs? That would have been 1973 or so. I didn't even have the WORDS to express what was going on in my head.

Then there were YEARS of social conditioning that being a... slur I'm not going to use... was just the worst thing even and that those people were sick. Then, of course, the realization that you're one of those people.

 

Then you go to therapy. Learn that you're OK after all. Your egg cracks and here we are. Some people though are still stuck in the past. They're convinced that you're unnatural and they need an explanation as to why you're like this. They don't care that you're happier, they just want you back in that box where they could deal with you. Heck, my birth-giver tried to blame it on asthma medication (it really was quite the unhinged rant). Then they focus on how they think it makes THEM look to have a trans spouse, child, whatever. It's kind of tragic when you think about it. To live in a world that small and dull? Horrifying.

 

Hugs!

@Jackie C. The same goes for me with my sister, at first she tried to act like she was ok with it then starts telling me that therapists cant be trusted and that they are leading me down a distructive path. That wasnt enough for then she sends me books about detransition and how these few non transgender people tell their stories of the horror of transition. I told her there is one big differance I always new I was transgender but in the 60's I didnt dare come out, and now that I have I feel good about my self. On another note next Monday I travle to Houston for my consult on FFS, I am so excited, and then the next week I go to Austin to do my name and gender marker change.

Hugs

 

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9 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

 Transitioning can be like swimming up a waterfall sometimes, you know?

 

Hugs!

nothing truer comes to mind right now. I honestly have nothing left in the tank right now and I;m about to start back on weekly electrolysis.  I'm almost in tears just thinking about it.

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1 hour ago, Bri2020 said:

nothing truer comes to mind right now. I honestly have nothing left in the tank right now and I;m about to start back on weekly electrolysis.  I'm almost in tears just thinking about it.

 

Sorry sweetie. I wish you renewed vitality and energy to go with your new, spicy love life. ❤️

 

Hugs!

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6 hours ago, Billie75B said:

then starts telling me that therapists cant be trusted and that they are leading me down a distructive path. That wasnt enough for then she sends me books about detransition

 

It's a firesale on tinfoil hats these days. A dozen for the price of one, free self-accredited PhD of Everything certification included with every purchase. 🙄

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13 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

Transitioning can be like swimming up a waterfall sometimes, you know?

 

Maybe if I'm lucky enough, that'll make me a natural! I think the last time I wasn't dealing with at least one kind of swimming upstream or another it was...umm...the 80's?

 

They claim practice makes perfect, but I only wish by now I felt like an expert at the upstream swimming event! Maybe I need to work on my breaststroke...

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My new work uniforms with Holly on them came in today.Start wearing them next week Monday.My employees said I am going to be treated the same calling me Holly starting next week Monday.

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While still not official. It looks like the other Assistant is going to move to the commercial desk. Our territory sales manager was in today. I heard him say. "Oh, ______ will be back here. " Of course, the store manager just tells me earlier in the week that we will be trying ____ on the commercial counter starting next week. Of course the other assistant is buddy buddy with everyone, including our district manager. 

 

screwed again, story of my life. Oh, well.

Still haven't received my eval yet. Maybe some century. I just may during the eval. the manager will say oh, you will get a $.50 raise. I may just say, Nope, I want a buck. After our previous commercial guy making $20 an hour, left. since they don't have that expense. They can afford giving me a buck raise. And the store losing 2 people in June and one in July, with one guy a manager. and another part time manager isn't going full time over the summer.

 

I need to look into increasing my VA disability, as I have been dealing with my major depression over 10 yrs. more like 14yrs. It is a chronic condition. Maybe I'll stop by the DAV office and look into it. They helped me with my other disability claims.

 

Sorry, I am a debbie downer right now. Can't sleep, I think my wife is pissed at me again. Nothing new there.

 

Try and have a good day. I hope to. I see my dermatologist today. get a couple problems looked at. 

 

big hugs to all

 

Kymmie

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At the risk of getting kicked off of this forum, I look at what is going on with the rhetoric of a supposed "political leader" that keeps trying to drum up support by picking on vulnerable populations, and the parallels to the the 1930s with a well known evil regime. The LGBTQIA+ population is being singled out as the cause of all that is wrong with America. Without any evidence to support this contention, we could be targeted.

 

The legislation packages being touted in these conservative states are very scary. I do not believe the majority of Americans wish us ill in any way, but there are some that are easily swayed. They will feel emboldened because of the messages that we are the evil ones. Is there a risk? Absolutely. When will we see these conservative areas controlled by the Republicans try to rollback the current level of protections we have? 

 

The idea that someone could try to overthrow and election, and then get away with it is just the beginning. If they do not do anything to this attempt, look out. The only thing missing is the establishment of a paramilitary force of their own to enforce the agenda. We saw this play out in the 1930s. Alarmist? I do not know, but in the last few days the Governor of Oklahoma signed off on a law barring anybody from changing their birth gender to non-binary. In Montana they tried to enforce the requirement of having gender affirmation surgery prior to having your gender marker changed on your driver license. The courts intervened for now.

 

We have already seen what DeSantis did to Disney. I wonder when DeSantis will attempt to take the park away from Disney using the eminent domain argument. The Governor of Texas declared that supporting your child in seeking transgender care was tantamount to child abuse, and as such, ordered these parents to be investigated for child abuse. The only hope is that the courts exercise better judgment. 

 

Imagine a vulnerable non-threatening group being rounded up, chastised, stripped of their dignity, rights, and property. It has happened before. A political leader using a vulnerable group as part of their climb to power. In the areas where this conservative tidal wave is advancing, we may see people thinking it is okay to assault or hurt us in other ways. Be careful.

 

Sincerely

Katie

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Good morning everyone,

 

By now most of you know I like my coffee HOT, black, and strong. After cooking myself breakfast, two large eggs in a bread nest, and one slice of pork sausage. I have a #HotSauce question. If you’re the only one in the house who uses #Tabasco. How long does your small bottle last? Mine seems to last 5 months. 
 

Hugs,

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

EAC062FB-CF13-44FD-9E03-987B8A6E74B2.jpeg

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Just dropping in to say Hi to everyone.  It has been a while since I logged in to the forum.  I hope that everyone is well.

 

Some definite adventures for me.  I'm down nearly 40 pounds since I last checked in.  Feeling great.  

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2 minutes ago, JamieGee said:

I'm down nearly 40 pounds since I last checked in.  Feeling great. 

That's Great @JamieGee CONGRATULATION!

 

This is a very good reason to check in, and say hello.

 

Best wishes, stay positive, and safe,

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

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1 hour ago, Katie23 said:

At the risk of getting kicked off of this forum, I look at what is going on……

You are raising some valid issues.  But perhaps we need a different thread to discuss it.

I also see a parallel to the 30's.

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47 minutes ago, Jandi said:

You are raising some valid issues.  But perhaps we need a different thread to discuss it.

I also see a parallel to the 30's.

Pee on the establishment pushing their BS regiment. I'm not going down without a fight, teeth and nails if needed.

 

 

021e3e1faf855e49093da9528aa5dd92.jpg

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1 hour ago, Mmindy said:

That's Great @JamieGee CONGRATULATION!

 

This is a very good reason to check in, and say hello.

 

Best wishes, stay positive, and safe,

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

Thanks.  Approximately 20 more to go for my goal weight.   

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Yeah there sure is much to unpack with the recent legislations, more reason than ever for visibility IMO. Imagine here in the States it being even more compartmentalized and divided than it already is. Trans refugees having to flee to "sanctuary states". 

 

My body's relationship to coffee and caffiene seems to have changed, switched from regular to instant, and now decaf instant. I still do not feel so well even with that. So I guess my body is really going through some changes, as my mother was always trying to modify her diet at my age too.

Looking back I realized her and my sisters either didn't take me seriously or thought I had gone bonkers when I came out to them and I guess just tried to be nice about it. Hence mom sending me misgendered birthday card a couple months after. But recent visits they are seeing the change I guess and now am finding out the various levels of acceptance and processing.

Am trying to keep friendships and make new ones but it's tough. I think I try too hard when meeting new people and need to just relax. The typical transing midlife trying to make up for lost time feeling thing...

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24 minutes ago, JamieGee said:

Approximately 20 more to go for my goal weight. 

That very cool, remember it's a lifestyle not a diet.

 

Eat healthy, portion control, and fitness are the key.

 

I'm happy for you and your progress,

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

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2 minutes ago, stveee said:

Recent visits they are seeing the change I guess and now am finding out the various levels of acceptance and processing.

Am trying to keep friendships and make new ones but it's tough. I think I try too hard when meeting new people and need to just relax. The typical transing midlife trying to make up for lost time feeling thing...

Good morning Stveee,

 

I read this as progress.

 

As for your body taking time to adjust to your morning wake up drink. Becoming caffeine free is a process that takes time. 

 

Hugs,

 

Mindy🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

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1 hour ago, KymmieL said:

Pee on the establishment pushing their BS regiment. I'm not going down without a fight, teeth and nails if needed.

 

 

021e3e1faf855e49093da9528aa5dd92.jpg

I LOVE the sign!!! Where can I get one?

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1 hour ago, Marcie Jensen said:

I LOVE the sign!!! Where can I get one?

I actually got the picture off line. but I am looking too.

 

Kymmie

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    • Ladypcnj
      Thanks Sally Stone
    • KymmieL
      Thanks, Mindy. It has been so far. Tomorrow, work some more on the wife's grand monkey. Got the right side of the hood primed, just need to do a little more work on the left then I can prime it. Then a 600grit wet sand.   I promised the wife we would take out the bike this weekend.   Kymmie
    • JessicaMW
      During my last visit with my psychologist (who has agreed to provide required letters of recommendation along with a colleague to provide the second) we discussed the shift towards my wife's acceptance. It was a long discussion but one point I mentioned was how much the two of us sitting down and watching this documentary helped:  The Kings | A transgender love story (2017)
    • Betty K
      Oops, I did not mean to post that comment yet! I was going to also say, having read a mountain of commentary on the Review, I think Julia Serano’s response (linked by Vicky above) is the most accurate and thorough. You can also read a non-paywalled version at Substack: https://juliaserano.substack.com/p/the-cass-review-wpath-files-and-the   To me the three key areas in which the review is deficient are:   1. As has already been said here, its views on social transition;   2. Its attempts to give credence to the “ROGD” theory (without ever actually mentioning ROGD because presumably a canny editor knows that would be too transparently transphobic);   3. To me, most crucially, its claims about trans youth and suicide, which are dealt with summarily in about five pages and do not stand up to any deeper scrutiny.    I will be writing about each of these issues in isolation over the next few weeks and appearing on a radio show and podcast to discuss them late in the month. I will post links to these on TP later if anyone is interested.   All that said, I actually think it’s dangerous for us to respond with outright vitriol and condemnation to the review since, like any effective piece of disinformation, it does actually contain some factually based and even helpful recommendations. The Tavistock Gender Identity Service really was underfunded and understaffed and certain staff were not adequately trained. Trans kids really were funnelled away from mental-health support once they started gender-affirming care too. So yes, more investment in youth psychology services would help, as would a less centralised model of care, more training in treatment of trans kids, and more research.   One last thing for now: beware the claim that Cass ignored 98% of studies. That’s not strictly true. She seems to have taken other studies into account but leaned heavily on the 2% that met her standards. Nor does she ever claim that only randomised controlled trials are good enough evidence to justify the use of blockers for kids; just as with ROGD, she strongly suggests this, but is too canny to say it, because she knows such trials would be impossible. For now, I think the best response to this comes from the Trans Safety Network: “[…] we believe there to be systemic biases in the ways that the review prioritises speculative and hearsay evidence to advance its own recommendations while using highly stringent evidence standards to exclude empirical and observational data on actual patients. “ (https://transsafety.network/posts/tsn-statement-on-cass-final-report/)   To me, the scariest aspect of all this is that, if it follows Cass’s recommendations, the NHS will very likely follow Finland’s recent model of trans care, which seems to amount to a prolonged form of conversion therapy. I can’t find the link right now, which is probably lucky for anyone reading this, but I bawled my guts out reading the testimonies of kids who had been mistreated by that system. Truly horrific. To me, at least from my Australian perspective, the Cass Review is the most frightening development in trans rights in recent years. To me, the safe care of trans kids is THE number one issue in politics atm.   Ruth Pierce has a good summary of responses from trans folk and their allies sk far: https://ruthpearce.net/2024/04/16/whats-wrong-with-the-cass-review-a-round-up-of-commentary-and-evidence/    
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      Welcome to the wide, wild world of transgender, M.A.  It can definitively be overwhelming, but everyone here is amazing, so no doubt you'll get bunches of wonderful support. I think you'll be happy you found us.   
    • Sally Stone
      @Ladypcnj  This is so true.  I think all of us here have had a post or two that didn't get a response.  Sometimes, it's as simple as adding to your original to post for a clearer explanation, or re-reading what you wrote originally, and rephrasing it.  But don't despair, we aren't ignoring you.   Hugs,   Sally 
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    • awkward-yet-sweet
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    • Cindy Lee
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    • awkward-yet-sweet
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    • awkward-yet-sweet
      I'd really love a professional stove.  There's actually one I want at Lowes, but its like $6k.  I've got plenty of money, the issue is that I'm not the queen (king?) of my den.  Or even of the kitchen.  My partner (husband's wife #1) owns that territory, and she's very attached to what she's got.  One of our stoves has 6 burners and a large oven, the other has 4 burners and a regular household sized oven.  And of course, there's always the wood-burning equipment.    Today was interesting.  We had the first campaign fundraiser for our sheriff and my sister.  My sister is running to be constable of our township.  Pretty sure she'll win, as her opponent is an old dude who is mostly running on "Don't elect a woman for a man's job"    What's weird is our sheriff is running as a Democrat, but he's conservative.  And his Republican opponent sounds like a leftist.  Welcome to Upside-down-ville   And of course all the kids got the chance to sit in a sheriff's car, and play with the lights.   We had a barbecue lunch and a dessert auction.  I baked three apple pies for it, and I was shocked that they sold for $20 each, since my cooking isn't that great.  My partner made her famous "Chocotorta."  It's like a chocolate layer cake with cream cheese, sweetened condensed milk, and it tastes amazing.  Usually we have it for Christmas and other really special occasions.  Two guys got into a bid war, and it sold for $175!!!    Yep, this is politics in the South.  Barbecue, pies, and police cars.  A great way to spend a Saturday
    • Davie
      Yes. That report is part of a conspiracy to torture and murder trans people. It is a lie. It is evil.
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