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How Did You Choose Your Female Name?


Guest Dr.Metropolis

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Guest LizMarie

Elizabeth was my grandmother's middle name, the most important woman in our family at that time. Fiercely independent, survived a divorce, raised 2 kids through the Depression, worked as a buyer for a department store, started her own grocery store, and finally built and ran her own hotel for the remainder of her life. If I had been born female I would have had her first and middle names but that fell to my younger sister when she was born. I fidgeted with middle names for a long time - Sarah, Anne, Angelica (Elizabeth Angelica is too much!), and finally settled on Marie as I like the flow and sound of Elizabeth Marie. Eventually I want to be mainly known as just Liz.

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Guest *Andrea*

I was timid to come up with a name alone. I asked a friend of mine to help me find a name that wasn't over the top girlish. I was afraid I might have come up with a name like that. As we talked about it, we kind of fell into a name that resembled my male name. It felt very natural to me and it makes me feel good to hear her call me by that name.

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Guest Cinnamon Girl

My counsellor asked me to pick a name that spoke to me, and this may sound a little bit looney, but since my real self has speaking to me for years, it was easy for her to speak up and introduce herself... myself as Chloe. It was a very unsettling but comforting experience!

So, hi, I'm Chloe!

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Guest VivienCutie

Well growing up I was always called by my middle name but my first name was Roy, and my mother wanted me to keep that in there since I was named after my grand pa. So I changed it to Rori and I go by my middle name Vivien, I got Vivien from old movies I use to watch and I looked up to Vivien Leigh :)

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Guest CandySweet

I always liked that famous Andy Warhol celebrity transgender girl named Candy Darling, and even though the name candy borders on camp, I liked it and Candy is my name when I am a girl.

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Guest Stuck

I haven't told anyone my name yet, way too far away from being able to it seems, but it is actually the name my mom would have named me, if I had been born cisfemale. It actually means the same thing as my given name, but she didn't know that until just before I was born, and my grandpa asked her what the final name candidates were, and he was like "... you know those both mean war/warrior?" and she was like "Uh... no."

I haven't even come close to settling on a middle name... they've always been kind of weird to me, and what little I've come up with doesn't sound right together, or doesn't seem like it fits.

Since I anticipate familial separation when I come out, I've got a last name in mind as well, the street I grew up on, which I sort of got from one of those "Find your pirate/pornstar/rockstar/gangster/etc name" games that people play.

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Guest Stormrider2112

I always liked that famous Andy Warhol celebrity transgender girl named Candy Darling, and even though the name candy borders on camp, I liked it and Candy is my name when I am a girl.

It's short for Candice, of course, right? :)
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  • Forum Moderator

First I used Kathleen for a few years. Got tired of it and changed to Caitlin. When I did the legal name change I wanted something new so I went with Mackenzie. My wife picked out my middle name.

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Guest Emilys_Heart

It was easy lol I took my birth named an added a feminine twist so from Emilio to Emily ^.^ ya kinda easy an sweet & simple

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Guest Elizabeth Marie

Mom said that I would have been named "Mary Elizabeth" had I been a GG. Since there are FAR too many Marys in our family anyway, I decided to reverse it and alter "Mary" to "Marie". I like the name much better.

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Guest paulam

I chose the feminine version of my male name(simple) and Anne as a middle name from a close and dearly loved relative. I like how Paula and Anne flow.

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Guest Robin Winter

I just spent some time thinking of names that I liked, and then spent some time with each thinking of it as my name. If I couldn't comfortably think of it as *my* name after a period of time, I moved on. I settled on Heather and it feels better and better all the time :) I even created a new e-mail and a few other accounts with that as my name, and I don't regret it.

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Guest elainamadisonc

i picked a first name i love and thought sounded girly elaina and the middle name went with the first name beautifuly (:

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Guest Elizabeth2014

When I came out to my GF (now my wife) that I dressed (little did she know), she chose Emma as my name. I kind of like it but... I have thought about Elizabeth when I transition, not sure yet. My mum thought she was having a girl when she was pregnant with me and would have called me Sally. Maybe I could have that as my middle name.

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I have the most wonderful friend. I was able to reconnect with a high school friend on FB after many years and she has been such a God send to me.

After I told her about being TS she said that she wanted to call me Audra. I love my name and I love my friend so much. I am truelyl blessed!

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Guest Lauren W

Mine's quite simple, really. I couldn't think of any names beginning with the letter of my male first name that I liked - admittedly I suck with names - so I looked to my middle name, which is Laurence, after my birth father. Within that is the name Lauren, which I like very much. However, I'm still undecided as to whether or not it'll be the name I end up sticking with. I haven't interacted with my father since I was... oh probably under 10 years old, perhaps 11 or so - I don't really recall - so I actually have no emotional connection to him at all. That added with the fact that he told my mum back before they separated - on multiple occasions I believe - that he would disown any of his children if they turned out gay makes me dislike taking the name.

But that's how I came up with the idea of my currently chosen name, even if it isn't permanent and changes some time in the future, as I'm sure my last name will. Kind of depressing, I know :).

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Guest LauraJen

Mine's quite simple, really. I couldn't think of any names beginning with the letter of my male first name that I liked - admittedly I suck with names - so I looked to my middle name, which is Laurence, after my birth father. Within that is the name Lauren, which I like very much. However, I'm still undecided as to whether or not it'll be the name I end up sticking with. I haven't interacted with my father since I was... oh probably under 10 years old, perhaps 11 or so - I don't really recall - so I actually have no emotional connection to him at all. That added with the fact that he told my mum back before they separated - on multiple occasions I believe - that he would disown any of his children if they turned out gay makes me dislike taking the name.

But that's how I came up with the idea of my currently chosen name, even if it isn't permanent and changes some time in the future, as I'm sure my last name will. Kind of depressing, I know :).

I really like Lauren also. It is one that I have experimented with at times as well. I changed to that last year as Laura does have a few (maybe minor) issues but I ended up changing back because the pull from Laura was too strong. It's no wonder, really - it has been the name I have identified with the most over the years, starting from a young age.

Other names I wouldn't at all mind having either are Lily, Lara, Lucy (or Lucie). That's a lot of Ls. There's also Jenna, Emma and Rachel.

I think I remembered how Jennifer came along as a middle name. I picked it when I registered here. As a username Laura was taken for obvious reasons, so I picked a middle name out of all of the other names I considered as first names and used part of it in the username. I liked the sound of Laura Jennifer and liked the username LauraJen.

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Guest Jocelyn

This a great topic. I chose my name with the help of my So, we looked up names and developed a short list then down to 2. I sat with them for a couple of days and Jocelyn felt the most comfortable to me. My SO first sujested the female version of my name, but my sister has it. My mother was hoping for a girl and pick a name but I cam out a boy so I got the male version of thr girls name. I changed my last name as well to my grandfathers last name because I felt like a wanted to have a nw start as Jocelyn with a new history. Marrie came later it just felt right.

thanks

Jocelyn Marrie

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Guest LauraJen

They're all wonderful names ^_^. I love your choice.

As is yours :) Thank you! They are pretty strong contenders, mind. Even to this day I sometimes find myself pondering having one of them instead. Names are hard :-/

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Guest Victoria71

I suppose Victoria Chose me more than me choosing her.

I used to get called Viki at School as a kid thanks to Vicky the Viking and my Surname from birth.

It has always been a Name I have loved and just feels right. It also has an air of Dignity and Royalnes about it.

My new surname I decided on using is acutaly the place I was Born in the UK

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    • Kay3Seven
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I started a new school, lost my couple friends, couldn't explain to anyone why I was sad, and mad and I started acting out. I got into trouble nearly daily. I was diagnosed ADHD, and stuffed full of meds. It just made things worse. I remember feeling like I could tell anyone anything that I felt inside. So I acted out more, getting into fights, skipping school to just wander around town alone. Then the summer between 3rd-4th grade came.. that summer was spent with my dad and step mom, and step siblings. That summer I was molested by my older step brother, he also molested my sisters and a couple neighbor kids. It messed me up in ways I didn't understand until I was much older.  I was scared, but finally told my mom just before Christmas that same year. Then it all unfolded, life was never the same. But not in the way you might think.  My step brother went away, and all of the kids including myself went into therapy. For years.  (Now, the part I didn't understand for a long time)  I knew that what happened was wrong, and I was not to blame. But, I also never felt like I was damaged from it. It was a thing that happened, but I moved on very quickly. I did not want to be in therapy, so I refused to cooperate for years. I went thru a handful of counselors and therapists. I tried to open up once, about wanting to be a female. They said "it must be a way to cope with a male taking advantage of me" and "you don't want to be a girl, your confused"... it really put me behind mentally having an adult tell me that I didn't know how I wanted to present externally. It was the first person I told anything to, really made me shut down.  I didn't get a passing grade in any class since that day. I kept my secret, and lashed out at the world.  My poor mom, I drug her thru the mud for years. She's the most amazing person, I wish I would have known that she would love me no matter what. But... I didn't. I got into fights, out past curfew, and ended up on probation, even did some time in juvenile detention. It wasn't all a bad childhood tho. My mom loved us kids, we grew up poor, but loved.  *Details you'll need later: I spent a lot of time cross dressing from about fourth grade on. Even more confusing, once I discovered my sexuality by myself, I knew I was very primarily attracted to women, but also learned that I very much enjoy an*l play... very confusing set of circumstances at a young age..  Back to it now. Once seventh grade came around my older sister came out as bi-sexual. She was in ninth grade, and she was my hero. And it nearly gave me the strength to talk to my mom about myself. But before I could I overheard a conversation between my dad and stepmom, tearing my mom down, saying that my sister would be "normal" if she had a better mom... it hurt my soul so much watching her get bullied, losing friends, and being the odd one out. I went deeeep back into my hole. I didn't come out of that hole for 22 years.  I dropped out of school the day I turned 16, and went to work. I found lifelong friends in the automotive racing community, I forced myself to be an alpha male type. It was the hardest years of my life. But at least I wasn't alone. I'm still great friends with a couple of them to this day.  Years after high school, and probation and all the woes of youth I found myself to be very lost in life. I had just gone thru a major heartbreak, I was 22 and spiraling into a dark place. My best friend talked me into moving across state to go to college with him, and so off we went. I would call boise Idaho huge, but it was big to me. That's where I met my now wife of ten years. She's amazing. We have a nearly nine year old daughter, finally this year bought a home. She has a great career, I'm still not super set on a career, but have always had a good paying job. 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I'm still not out publicly, if your from idaho you might understand. It's very hard to be different here.  But I'm coming up on 8 months on hrt, have had 6 laser sessions on my face, still working on my weight, I'm a chunker(sugary things are my weakness lol.. and I've been slowly over the last couple years wearing things I love. I paint my nails, I wear mascara, I'm not really hiding things from the world. But also not pushing it into the light. Wow... I can go on like this forever! If you've made it here, thank you for sticking with me!  It feels good to be able to put all of my nonsense somewhere.  xoxo, Kay  
    • Mikayla2024
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    • awkward-yet-sweet
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    • MaryEllen
      Rule # 4 of the community rules  4    Be supportive of all members. Implying that a particular member's problems are less pressing or valid than those of others is not allowed. Likewise, invalidating the experiences of another member or suggesting they're overreacting to their situation or faking a crisis is forbidden. If you feel unable to respond supportively to what a member is discussing, choose instead not to respond at all.
    • Nonexistent
      That's interesting, I didn't know that.   I do need to work on this with my therapist. I have so much self-hatred/embarrassment, and a lot of it relates to being trans. Thanks.
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