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Good morning All. Coffees on.


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To everyone you are all my friends


Rather than miss someone, instead of individually responding or wishing each of you individually, accept that our circle is growing each and every day.  That is one of the many things I feel blessed about with this forum.


I read all your posts and you all deserve my care, concern and love 💕 but I can’t always keep up.


please know that I am with you all each and everyday.  That I care about your pain and your triumphs.


Have a very merry Christmas and a happy new year.


your friend in all ways



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We had our "Family Christmas" already.  One Daughter invited me for dinner with her in-laws' family.  But they are a 2 hr+ drive from here.  I'm just staying home with my youngest daughter who has been staying with me lately.



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Well said @Willow,


Merry Christmas, I also think of the people here on Transgender Pulse Forums as extended family, because we do share a common since of being.





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So far I've been able to stay drunk most of the day/  Not the best solution but it works foe me.  At this point I have to look at a clock to know what time it is.  Seriously thinking thins may be my  last xmas.

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3 hours ago, LaurenA said:

So far I've been able to stay drunk most of the day/  Not the best solution but it works foe me.

I am familiar with the feeling.  But as you say, not the best.

There are people here - including myself - thinking of you and all the others alone today.

I have my daughter here, but that is mostly since she broke up with her boyfriend.  Still, I'm not alone this year.

Thinking of you Lauren.

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1 hour ago, Trans22 said:

I need to save up and buy myself a Mac, making too many mistakes with Acer laptop trackpad. 

Just need to get a separate mouse. I much prefer it over the finger pad.



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Christmas has been great for me.Was at my parent's place.My cousin Mike and I talked about something,said finally he understands why I transitioned now.We had a falling out at first after I came out and he knew the hatchet had to be buried.I saw the change in him telling him thank you.

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Speaking of computers and laptops and even notepads,


I have an iMac which I haven’t turned on in a few months, I have a MacBook Air which is my goto laptop but I can’t upgrade the operating system, it’s been several years now, (same with the iMac), I have a Lenovo laptop, Windows 2000 is as far as it goes, iPad Pro which is what I use the most.  

the Lenovo is my most hated.  Not because it’s Windows, my work life generally required Windows so I am used to that, but because of the touchpad.  I hate that touchpad!  One reason I have it is my wife has software for her embroidery that requires Windows.  And my MacBook Air has died on me several times and I can’t afford to replace it but I have managed to get it going eventually each time it died.


there are things I like about Apple and there are things I prefer about Windows. But I won’t ever purchase another Mac.



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@Willow  Interesting that you have a laptop so old that it runs Windows 2000.  My husband has an ancient Gateway Solo.  It takes floppy disks, and looks so chunky it seems military.  He never uses it, just keeps it along with a couple of desktops in storage from the 80's.  Those things are beginning to be collectible and worth money 😉


I use Mac for art programs, but that's it.  They just have better offerings for a professional, and most art/design schools train their students with them.  For any other use, I use Windows.

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2 hours ago, Trans22 said:

I need to save up and buy myself a Mac

Macs are probably overpriced, but I like them.  I can use windows when I have to, but don't enjoy it.  It's probably only that I'm used to the Mac.  I do most of my computer stuff (writing) on this MacBook Air.  It has the M1 chip (?) in it.  It is also just small enough to fit into the purse I normally carry.  I use a bluetooth mouse with it, although I often just use the trackpad.

I also have a iPad that my kids gave me since it was hard to see stuff on my phone.

I was quite late in getting into computers, and my daughter - a graphic designer - turned me onto Macs.

I like that all three of these work together in the cloud.  I can look at some files from the MacBook on the iPad etc.

That used to scare me for privacy issues, but hey, I'm online… I have no secrets.

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7 hours ago, LaurenA said:

So far I've been able to stay drunk most of the day/  Not the best solution but it works foe me.  At this point I have to look at a clock to know what time it is.  Seriously thinking thins may be my  last xmas.


I know what that feels like.  Back in my single days, I used to just take sleeping pills.  Life couldn't hurt if I was unconscious.  Especially the one year where my sister had her own life with a girlfriend and I was left totally alone.  I think we all have phases in life where the holidays can be miserable. 

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40 minutes ago, LaurenA said:

Wye shouldn't die?

Well for one thing, you don't know that things won't get better.  That's just what you feel at the moment.

I mean, been there, got the scars.


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It turns out I had enough money to buy an M2 Macbook Air & have just done so.  FYI:  I'm am most proficient on the RedHat Enterprise Linux operating system - manage a research Linux cluster environment at work.

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Continue to talk about Apples, my iPad Pro is the smaller one the 10” latest version.  I must say, I don’t like the multi screen and have been trying to get it turned off to no avail.


I too prefer the MacBook Air 256 ssd which is small by today’s standards and it’s probably about 10 years old.  Also, I believe I was mistaken one the windows version I believe it’s 10 but can’t go to 11?  It’s one version behind.  Anyway, I prefer Apple over windows and Android but I can operate either.  It’s the particular Lenovo touchscreen that gives me issues.  Even the slightest touch and it will do unexpected things.


at this point all computers would have to go to end of life for me to ever consider a replacement.


I am concerned about laurenA but I am not qualified to counsel her.  Perhaps someone with more experience could try to talk to her.



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@Trans22 I’ve been curious about Linux for some time now but what software runs on Linux?  Word processing/editing, spreadsheets, browser or email?


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Well I think I finally figured out what famous person I most relate to. It is Charlie Brown, Like him I don't have many/any friends, and sometimes I really F things up.



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Drunk last night, drunk the night before, I'm going to get drunk tonight like I've never been drunk before.

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I hope everybody had a good Christmas. @LaurenA I realize that it may not seem like you have no friends. You however do here on Transpulse.  I don't want to seem like a doogooder. Alcohol isn't the answer. It killed three of my brothers in laws. One probably never knew he had liver disease. That is what took him. 


On another note. My wife was able to finally get her inheritance.  While she had said she would share it. TO help with the bills. Not happened so far. Even telling her that after paying storage. Our joint account will have about $40 in it. She has already paid off the Yukon that we purchased and letting our middle son use.  She also wants to get our youngest a new phone, saying this very morning that she didn't want to get him he doesn't like.


I am going to rain on her parade. She is all excited about having our grandsons over the end of the week. I am going to tell her maybe 1 or 2 days. Right now we don't have a functioning furnace. Plus one of the portable ones we are using is a propane with an open flame. Not good with a rambunctious 14 month old and a 30 month old. 


She is in a subconscious (maybe) war with my daughter in laws mom. She has $$$ and the house they are living in was purchased by her.  They are paying rent (making the payment) on the house. So my wife has to buy them the Yukon XL I mentioned above.  


I guess it is part of living in a toxic relationship. My wife has said that because of her school (she's a custodian) has a gender neutral bathroom is why she has a problem with me being trans. I don't understand either.


Christmas hugs,



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@Willow There are many flavors of Linux, Ubuntu is probably the most user friendly.  There is an enormous amount of free (mostly OpenSource) software available under Linux.  Linux isn't as disk, memory, or CPU hungry as Windows - so you can play with Linux on old, but otherwise functional, hardware/PCs that are no longer supported by the latest version of Windows.  This is how I'd recommend most people enter into the world of Linux.
All of my transpulse interactions have been done from a Ubuntu operating system.  I use Google for documents, spreadsheets, Email, etc. - mostly because I've experienced disk and RAID volume failures.

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11 hours ago, KymmieL said:

Just need to get a separate mouse. I much prefer it over the finger pad.



Amen. Me, too. 

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Good morning to all.


As much oh the world celebrates Boxing Day, this could still be a part of your celebration. 

there are also celebrations that are not based on Christianity so what ever you celebrate this time of year, be happy and enjoy your festivities.



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