Lets Party By The Pool & Talk

[Guest Opal]

" Oh Sally !!!!! Look at that beautiful star cluster on your right!!!!!!

*comm to Dee Jay* *whispers* "Thank you Dear! Luv You! Huggs!"

[Guest Micha]

Medical-I need something for a headache! Stat.

It aint medical, but my cocktails can cure about whatever ails ya! *shakes shaker, pours, garnishes*

[Guest Opal]

It aint medical, but my cocktails can cure about whatever ails ya! *shakes shaker, pours, garnishes*

* comm to Micha * *whispers * " Hi Micha! Hope you are doing well. I think the Captain could use something alright. Please bring Dee Jay if you can. Luv Ya! Oh, and did a bunch of Tribbles and Alderaran shiskey suddenly beam into Ten Forward? "

" Sir! Fleet Admiral Ravenwood on a secure channel for your eyes only. Is that a relative, or you from the future???!!!"

[Guest Elizabeth K]

REPORT – (Stardate Autolog Referenced)

Captain, Sir: As Counselor I need to advise you the ship's crew list is in disarray as of 8300 hours Stardate previous log, and it is impossible to run a comprehensive security check prior to disembarkation as per REGULATIONS, so those aboard at that time must be considered as officially assigned crew for the entire voyage W/O security clearance. As the run-time for this mission is open ended, we as the executive crew, must be prepared to deal with a MOTLEE* selection of member's, some of dubious origin.

[*Mainly All Those Losers Easily Enlisted]

I ran a security check and records verification on those known to be included as crew - about 32% of the crew (base upon the projected total ship’s design criteria operational force) are in place. I found 31% are in CLEARANCEDAT - REJECTION STATUS indicated with the marker 'RED LEVEL CAUTION - UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES TO BE ALLOWED STARSHIP ACCESS. Only one person was found eligible - that person was the ship's HR Director who provided me this report (with suspicious corrections to her file).

NOTE: The HR was very rude to me at the time and I intend to ask for her to be written up by her supervisor. Part of my CLEARANCEDAT is incorrect. My application CLEARLY included in my Parole REPORT, those 32 hijacked vessels were not my direct responsibility! I also would like to protest the deduction of 2,667,788 credits out of my Fleet-pay for reimburse for that scuttled transport*.

[*My calculations show I will be required to stay StarFleet Commissioned for 234.6 years to satisfy that debt, which is unlikely to happen. I plan to retire in 150 years, depending on a shared booty disbursement of 10% of MILSAP* - so the fine reimbursement assessment voluntary donation is excessive. And my sources indicate most of the botcrew was salvaged and converted to washing mechs on the USS Compliant. I should not have to pay full damages]

(*Miscellaneous StarAnnual Pay)

In addition, I would like to note officially in this REPORT the fact that SEEKER is one-third staffed, and formally request my pay be tripled.

CONFIDENTIAL

Captain: Why was my position changed from “Executive Councilor” to “Le Conseiller au Capitaine? And why is the Intership Transport setting in my suite defaulted to “Le Capitaine?” Who reserve-stocked in my name, those 100 cubecartons of 60% Intense Dark – Evening Dream Cacoa Chocolates, with chili and cherry bits (coincidentally my favorite)???

[As a personal note; please! My default setting on the I.T. is “Lady Bug” and I wish it to stay that].

Captain, a discrete inquiry, FYE only. What are these red marked indications on your record for the responsibility of the destruction of the animal test lab on Planet Avon-Calling? Also what is the claim of your involvement for the elimination of the History Storage Records of entire Republican Party History of the historic USA? And what is a “georgebush” and why are there two separate species of this plant?? And is it accurate you cast a vote for M. Gandhi in 207 consecutive United Federation Presidential elections? And the newly discovered missing chapter of the Warren Commission suggests a direct ancestor of yours destroyed vital information – so what is a “grassyknoll? What is a “mafia?” Are these more plant references?

And the references to "crusades" in your resume’? How does the experience as a “nighttemper” apply to your current status?

Please note as LCAC (Le Conseiller au Capitaine) I have access to your personnel files and the vidrecords of your activities at my disposal. What is a Le corset lacé de torture ? And why all the noir Le corset lacé de torture and iron maiden references in the HOLODECK library? What is ‘La foire annuelle de Renaissance?’

Ummmm … An ‘amended report’ to StarFleet of the above information … um… is herein offered for considerations rendered on the 2,667,788 credits reduction to say , 1200 credits max?

Elizabeth Anne Jinkins–Jinklehymer–Schmidt-Loy, LCAC Starship SEEKER

[future consideration to abbreviate either as EAL- Conseiller (formal) or “Lizzy - B of NO” (informal) respectively requested]

END OF REPORT

[JJ]

Personal FYE to Lizzy-are you sure you prefer tat i address you as B of NO-I realize it is an honorific but I find myself personally reluctant to apply it

Until that medication from 10 Forward arrives let me just briefly address relevant points in your report

*Only 1 crewmember fit? and that's suspicious??Groan-Call to 10 Forward-Mhe tat a Double and keep 'em coming!*

Your designation of EAL- Conseiller seems reasonabe and is hereby instituted.

And that fine reduction-consider it done! You did say you did NOT keep a personal copy of that report didn't you?

Was that holodeck program intriguing??

Your ally

Captain James

[Guest jrm]

-finds a box of professional grade fireworks- oooooooooh fireworks

anyone got a lighter??

[Flint]

*passes you lighter*

[Guest jrm]

-tapes lighter so it stays lit without holding it -

hmmmmm should i throw it at the box??

[JJ]

Secutiry!! We need security for security on the double!! And wear your visor!

Everybody else DUCK!!

[Guest jrm]

-throws lighter-

BOOOOOOOOM

wooooooaaaaaaaah

-pushed box out airlock right before explosion-

[Flint]

I guess i'll be needing a new lighter........

[Guest Elizabeth K]

DONALD DUCK!

I mean... LOOK OUT Donna Jean!

Lizzy - "Beloved of No Other" (B of NO) may be too strong? What about NOLA instead - Ms Lizzy - "New Orleans Lady and Astrochick"

EAL- Conseiller (formal)

[JJ]

*Captain turns purple and starts to yell-looks at jrm and just sakes his head and drops it to his hands instead with a groan muttering "What have I done? What have I done??". Finishes off the double and calls 10 Forward for a replacement while despondently spitting out one of Dee Jay's black feathers.

Turns to Science Officer -You have the con-I need to go and lie down. Call me when we are approaching rendezvous.

[Flint]

I love Donald duck!

[JJ]

I love Donald duck!

We might as well add him to the crew he'd fit right in!

[JJ]

DONALD DUCK!

I mean... LOOK OUT Donna Jean!

Lizzy - "Beloved of No Other" (B of NO) may be too strong? What about NOLA instead - Ms Lizzy - "New Orleans Lady and Astrochick"

EAL- Conseiller (formal)

Ah-sorry I was referencing something else entirely-(you wicked, wicked woman0 so of course we will retail B of NO if that is your preference. Was there a problem with your welcome gift and cabin arrangements/ My error-I shhall rectify it immediately and reset the trnsporter to your prefererred co-ordinates.

All my person records did you say??

[Guest Sam_P]

In need of any more science officers? *reporting for duty*

[JJ]

In need of any more science officers? *reporting for duty*

*Captain James rushes out from his ready room when he hears those words*

Wecome aboad!! And in regulation uniform1 Congratulations Sir and welcome aboard. We have numerous vacancies in the science section and could also use someone with Starfleet knowledge to serve as Protocol Officer. That would be in addition to your official duties as Science Officer. When you make the acquaintance of our crew you'll understand the necessity.

Please stow your gear and report to the Chief science Officer for assignment

* When Sam's back is turned Captain James does a happy jig*

[Milly]

Hehe so that's where my fireworks went. :3

[Guest Opal]

" Sir, the rendezvous ship is hailing us. Sir?? "

[Guest jrm]

-starts moonwalking-

we're in space so i had to do it

[JJ]

Thank you Officer Opal

Actual rendezous has been arranged for 1 :47 minutes.

Astrogator Sally please downlead coordinates

[Sally]

Aye, Aye, captain.

We will be on schedule.

Sally

[Guest Jean Davis]

Whoo Hooo, I got some directions.

(Jumps in the drivers seat)

Let's see what this puppy can do shall we.

(Fuddles with controls)

What's this, it says "Warp" and it goes to level 10.

Ok let's try that, level 10 (presses button)

Hang onto your hats.

Whoo Hoo this puppy cooks.

LUV

Jean

[Guest Opal]

" Sir, Star Fleet Command on secure channel for you again, your eyes only "