A Place To Say Something

[Guest Mia J]

So true Cindy. You hit a point and you find you have so fit into who you really are that people just pick up on it. It helps one feel they have finally made it.

Mia

[StephanieVikingGirl]

About a week ago when my friend Jennifer was visiting, we went grocery shopping at the Safeway store in St. Helena. I was in the same skirt that I am wearing today, and as I went down one aisle a guy I know from work was coming down the aisle quickly, and he said "hi Gary!" as he went passed, and I kind of sheepishly replied in my now standard voice "uhh...hi..". It did seem a bit awkward hearing my male name, and not being able to use my old male voice anymore. Amazingly it didn't bother me being seem in one of my skirts by a co-worker, since I am actually "out" to the company now. I don't know if everyone in the company knows my female name yet though, but I kind of assume that word has gotten around about me being trans. Also, later when Jennifer and I were in the check out line one of the cashiers needed to get past us, and he said to us "excuse me ladies, I just need to get through". The lesson I take from that shopping experience is that while folks who see me frequently and knew me as him still find it easy to recognise me, I do pass okay as female otherwise. I just thought I would share, thanks.

hugs,

Stephanie

[Guest LizMarie]

People who knew us before have images in their heads with which they are often reluctant to part.

I find that among people I don't know or didn't know before transitioning, that there is no doubt, they see me as female. It's among those who knew me as male that seem to have trouble letting go, especially family when they don't want to let go.

[Cyndee]

My neighbor across the street, whom I have known for well over 20 years used my real name (quite nicely) for the first time this week. This was a very significant acknowledgement of my transition as he was a previous source and trigger of dysphoria with me, this small event provided a level of closure to this....sweet.

[Guest MostlySwell]

That's great, Cyndi. What a victory!!! Twenty years is a long time to invalidate a neighbor. My goodness. I hope they experienced some healing out of letting go.

Y'all have been posting about the difference in how we are seen by people who knew us before transitioning and those they didn't. I, too, had some pretty amazing experiences with that when I was out of town at a conference. Friends who were whole-heartedly supportive slipped with their pronouns in referencing me, but none of the hotel staff did. It was really fun to see my friends amazement when they witnessed how I was perceived by others. They quickly realized it was their own thing in not seeing me fully as male and not how I was presenting. I totally understand that these things take time and I don't blame them in the least. It was nice, though, for them to stop putting their misgendering me on me and to simply understand that they, too, are in transition (about me.)

Frederic

[Guest SnowCat]

Today is the holiday of college and university students in Bulgaria. So cheers to everyone who's in college or university.

[Guest LizMarie]

What made me happy today? Something perhaps absurdly silly - I got my first notice from my health insurer that I was due for a mammogram.

[Cyndee]

Those are great Cara, I received one too from my insurance, according to them, I am also due for my cervical exam

[Guest otter-girl]

For the first time ever the other day I passed when I least expected it. I was wearing tight jeans, trainers, baggy fleece (that did nothing to my shape as it was XL and I'm a medium), woolly hat. I was even holding my SOs hand, another pointer that would normally flag male to most folks. I also wasn't actually trying to pass. Yet someone referred to us in passing as 'ladies' plural, that meant me too. Took ages to get the smile off my face. I'm nowhere near pulling this off on demand but it does give hope. It also means I have to re-adjust my thinking about passing.

Hugs

Rach.

[Guest Claire-G]

So I am a mentor in work for a new program we are going to use in the near future.

Yesterday the roster came out when in january the teaching days are (it's one on one training just for a day)

And the weird thing was I wasn't on the roster at all but my collegea was teaching 4 people.

So I mailed to the person and asked why I wasn't on the roster.

I get this whole story about he was busy had to do it in between work etc etc.

However in the end he said he looked at the prefenrences of the people and they asked for the other collegea.

I've trained 3 people so far and it went fine no problems at all.

Sigh I can't help but think it's because I'm a transgender.

Silly problaby and I'll never be able to prove it but it's just this gnawing feeling.

Ok that was bit for today

[Guest otter-girl]

No more electrolysis for 3 weeks. Good as I hate growing it out but bad as its going to take forever.

[Guest Rose]

A few of my family members started calling me Rose as of yesterday. I'm not entirely used to it, but I like it.

[Guest odidurn]

oddly enough, i think MMORPGs might be the reason i didn't figure it out until my mid teens.

i didn't care about it at all when i was a kid, i just played MMOs all day.

i quit the last of them sometime in highschool, and then *mysteriously* started moping about it.

continued moping about it on a daily basis for the next few years.

returned to an MMO a few days ago and haven't been upset about all this Transgender stuff since.

i feel like this has to be the most laughable revelation i've ever encountered.

[Guest otter-girl]

Nearly started crying in a supermarket this evening. Thank God it was late and quiet. Blame it on some haunting Christmas tune that tweaked something. Jeeze Rachel get a grip!!

[Guest]

For the love of ........... Skirts.

Thank you my Dear Sister from this summer.

Huggs,

Joann

[gennee]

I received an increase in my SS and VA pension.

[Cyndee]

Simplify, when in doubt, simplify.....

We have the power within us all to reduce problems, not magnify them.

Tear the pieces apart, put them back together. Fix what's wrong, simplification is a powerful answer.....

[JJ]

Wish I had learned decades ago that my life and my happiness are in my own hands. That nothing and no one else can make me happy but I CAN. It is as simple and hard as making up my mind to do my best and then doing it without giving in to fears and excuses.

And knowing that makes me so much less afraid to live my life and face my world.

Funny thing is I had to learn to be happy too. It was-and sometimes still is - really scary. Like the world must be setting me up sometimes. But then I remember that I got through so much in my life and ultimately through transition and I know I can handle what comes. Not to mention I finally got it through my head that 99% of what I fear never happens, yet I have paid for it as if it did. And the 1% isn't the way I thought it would be, nor does the worry and fear help me deal with it. So much time and energy and happiness thrown away.

But that is water under the bridge. I thank my Creator every day I have learned and that I have another day to live. Too many people never find this peace - all in all in spite of everything I'd say now I'm a lucky guy

Johnny

[Cyndee]

I read Johnny's message above a few times over this morning, there is a real wisdom embedded in these words, just sayin'

[Guest]

Johnny is a wise man indeed.

Huggs,

Joann

[Guest Draco121]

I was referred to as sir today at the airport when I was buying food. It made me feel so great and released me of some of my negative feelings. I was so happy that I walked right past my gate and had to turn around.

[Guest Destiny Lynn]

I'm going shopping in Bowling Green today

[Cyndee]

Deep into the 21st century I will travel....

[Cyndee]

Enlightenment comes to the seekers, and those equiped to travel. Truth in and of your soul, and it's all too beautiful....

[Cyndee]

On my way to band practice last week, just after sunset, and the city lights were so beautiful in the twighlight, all the green and blue lights on the skyscrapers, it's looks surreal. We live in one of the most awesome places on this entire planet.

Go Hawks !!